17. Luna
Luna
I ’m surrounded by warmth.
My eyes flutter open and I see the light of morning sunshine filtering through the windows.
It’s morning.
And oh my god.
The heat surrounding me is coming from Kane. I’m instantly aware of every single part of my body. His entire front is pressed along my back, and one of his thick, muscular arms is slung over my waist, cradling me close to him.
That was one of the most pure, blissful nights of sleep I’ve ever had.
My chest gets tight. I really like this, being surrounded by all of Kane’s strength and safety. But I shouldn’t.
This was probably a one-time thing and doesn’t mean the same thing to him as it does to me.
“I can feel you thinking,” Kane says, his chest vibrating behind me with a purr as he buries his face into the crook of my neck. “Good morning.”
His proximity to the pulse in my neck makes me aware of how unbonded I am. Would I look as good as Charlotte did with her bondmates’ marks on her neck?
“Good—Good morning,” I squeak. “I’m sorry, I overthink a lot?—”
“Don’t you dare apologize. You have nothing to apologize for.” He pulls me tighter against his body.
My pulse picks up when I feel his hardness pushing against my backside through his sweatpants.
Holy shit. I’m not usually one to swear, but if anything warrants swearing, it’s the feel of him .
He feels gigantic.
“That was the best night of sleep I’ve gotten in years,” he murmurs, his warm breath tickling the side of my neck.
“Really?”
He turns me to face him and I duck my head, trying to hide my burning face.
“Really.” He cups my cheek in his hand, guiding my gaze up to meet his.
His eyes dart between mine and I feel a flutter in my belly as he leans closer.
That flutter moves lower as he softly brushes a quick kiss against my lips.
It’s pretty chaste in comparison to the kisses we shared last night, but I’m still grateful for the sign of affection.
It’s like he’s trying to tell me that last night wasn’t a one-off. That he’s still interested in me.
“I love how cute you look when you blush,” he teases, brushing a bit of my bedhead away from my face.
I just try and hide my face even more, groaning in embarrassment.
“That was supposed to be a compliment,” he laughs. “What’s going on in that head of yours that’s got you this embarrassed?”
I shake my head as I bury it in his chest. “I’m not telling you,” I say, my voice a bit muffled.
“Okay, I’ll stop pushing for now. But I want you to know one day I’d like to hear what’s got you acting like this. ”
“Mhmm, sure.” I don’t know if I’ll ever be brave enough to talk about how I imagined what he would feel like inside me. I take a deep breath, trying to collect myself before looking back up at him. “How long have you been up?”
“Not too long, I haven’t slept in this late in forever, but I didn’t want to wake you.”
“What time is it?”
“Eleven-thirty.”
“Oh my gosh, that’s pretty late, you could’ve left if you had something to do!” I say, pushing myself up and trying to hand-brush my hair away from my face.
“Don’t worry about it, I wouldn’t have wanted to be anywhere else.
” He pulls out his phone and checks something before looking back up at me.
“Chase left to go run some errands and Madden and Archer had some work to do, but they’ll be back for lunch around one-thirty if you want to try making something.
I know we talked about things last night and you mentioned wanting to try cooking something yourself. ”
An opportunity to make something for the pack again? To prove?—
No. Not to prove, but to show them how grateful I am for everything they’ve done?
“Yes! I’d love to do that.”
“Great, I can get some administrative work done on my laptop if you want company while you cook.”
“I’d really like that,” I say, reaching up slowly and petting his beard. It’s a bit thicker than a five o’clock shadow right now. I like the feel of it under my fingertips.
“Alright, how about I go get the things you need to change your bandages and then you can get ready.”
“O—Okay, thank you, I appreciate it.”
I feel the chill of his absence immediately after he stands from the bed. I was going to ask whether I could take a shower or not, but now I don’t want to just yet. I want to have his scent on my skin for as long as possible.
When he returns, he gestures for me to sit at the edge of the bed. He kneels at my feet and I feel the same warm flutters return with a vengeance. I wonder what it would feel like to have him kneeling in front of me doing something other than changing my bandages.
My cheeks feel fiery hot all over again. What in the world is going on with my brain right now? I’ve never ever thought this way.
The last time Archer changed my bandages, I was a bit too overwhelmed with all the things he was telling me about my place as an omega being nothing like what I’d been told growing up.
Now there’s none of that.
My existential crisis right now is a bit different.
After that first kiss with Kane last night and how much I liked it, I’ve seemingly opened the floodgates of the possibilities of what physical touch with my alphas could look like.
My alphas.
For the first time since I’ve gotten here, the thought of calling them my alphas doesn’t seem blatantly wrong.
“I can feel you thinking again,” Kane says. He seems familiar with all the supplies as he opens up the first aid kit.
“I—Can you really feel me thinking?” I stutter.
“No, not technically,” he chuckles. “But you do get this furrow right here.” He gently taps the place between my eyebrows. “It’s quite cute.”
“You call me cute a lot.”
“It’s the truth.” He says, finishing his prep with all the supplies. “This is going to sting.”
I nod, reaching down to grip his shoulder. The physical contact with him seems to soothe something inside of me.
I don’t know whether the contact genuinely made things better or whether it’s just because they’ve healed a bit more, but it definitely makes things easier.
He takes a bit more time to rub in the antiseptic cream, working his way up my legs and looking up at me with a mischievous twinkle in his eye like he read my mind earlier when he first got down on his knees in front of me.
“Can you read my mind?” I blurt out.
He bursts out laughing. “No, little one, I can’t read your mind.”
“It really feels like you can sometimes,” I grumble.
“I mean, you are easy to read. You’re not that good at hiding your feelings.”
“So you can read my mind!”
“No,” he says, leaning in, his hand a lot higher on my thigh than any of them have ventured before.
“But you’re forgetting that your perfume telegraphs a lot of your emotions.
It was pretty easy to piece together what you were thinking when I went down on my knees in front of you and your perfume got so sweet I wanted a taste. ”
I cover my face with my hands.
“Okay, okay, I get it.”
He reaches up, tugging gently on my wrist. “This really isn’t something you have to be embarrassed about. It’s just your body’s natural reaction. No shame necessary.”
That’s easier said than done.
“I—I don’t know about that.”
“Okay, baby steps then.” He finishes applying the antiseptic cream and starts applying new bandages. “I’ll be downstairs in the kitchen.”
When he leaves my room, I take a second to catch my breath.
It really does feel like I’ve opened the floodgates of dirty thoughts in my brain.
And I guess I’ve opened the floodgates for Kane too, he’s the last one out of all four of them that I would’ve thought would say things like that to me this early on .
I brush my hair and teeth and try to make myself a bit more presentable before grabbing my tablet and heading downstairs.
The scrapes I have feel a bit tight against my skin as I walk and my ribs are still tender to the touch, but that night of rest seems to have really helped with the pain I’ve been feeling.
I’m still grateful when I see a bowl of washed fruit next to a glass of water and my pain medications next to Kane, who’s sitting at a barstool typing away at his laptop.
“Thank you,” I say.
“Of course, you’re welcome.”
“What’re you working on?” I ask, turning on the tablet and looking through the digital library of cookbooks Madden talked about earlier.
“Just some administrative stuff for the security company. Some emails to manufacturers and that sort of thing.”
I nod, getting started on the bowl of fruit. Blackberries this time. I go to the one-pan recipe cookbook because I don’t know if I’m brave enough to try some of the more complicated dishes.
I find a chicken casserole dish that I think we have all the ingredients for and get started.
As I make my way through the instructions, I get lost in all the steps. I feel the weight of guilt starting to lift from my chest. I don’t think I noticed it until now, but I’ve been getting a bit stir-crazy without having anything to do.
Before I know it, I’m popping the casserole in the oven.
“All done?” Kane asks, standing from his seat.
“Yeah, fingers crossed it turns out okay,” I say, leaning against the countertop. It wasn’t necessarily the most complicated thing I’ve ever cooked in my life, but it definitely had the best and freshest ingredients I’ve ever used. I would hate for it to go to waste if I messed up.
“We’re used to eating like shit, so anything other than charcoal is still going to be a hit with us. No need for you to worry.” Kane starts moving as if he’s going to start cleaning the mess I’ve made .
“Oh, it’s okay!” I say, moving to grab his arm as he starts reaching into the sink. “I can clean, I made the mess.”
“You cooked, though. It’s only fair that someone else cleans.”
“But—“
“I really would like to help.” He looks so sincere that I can’t say no.
“O—Okay, thank you.” We trade places, with me sitting at the bar and him in the kitchen. “Did you get to finish some of the work you wanted to get done?”