29. Luna
Luna
T his apartment still feels unfamiliar. It doesn’t feel like home.
I don’t think a space like this will ever feel like home, no matter how much time I’ve spent in it.
It’s been a week since I was dropped off at the omega center by the police and six nights since I was given this apartment.
So technically, I’ve spent more time in this place than I did at the Ward pack house. But their home felt infinitely more like home than this place does.
It’s kind of funny, when I think about it. All I wanted when the pack first found me was my own place with my own things.
Well, here I am. And I hate it.
Maybe it’s because back then, I wanted to be free of alphas. Free of my status as an omega and the servitude I thought went along with it. And even though there are no alphas in this space right now, I know this place isn’t free.
The only reason why I’m being given a luxury apartment to stay in temporarily is because I’m an omega. There is a payment involved in the form of my time, my body, and well, me.
It isn’t as bad as I was led to believe—I won’t be chained down to a bed, forced to always be naked, presenting for every alpha that wanted me—but there is subservience in my position.
The Director said I’ll have a choice in who I choose, but I’m still being forced to meet other options even though I know the choice I want to make. I’m still not free from the desires of unknown alphas.
My doorbell rings, making me freeze in my seat on the sofa. My legs are stiff when I slowly and a bit cautiously make my way to the door.
That sofa is so much harder than the sofa in Kane’s study.
Of course, I’m grateful for the things I have here: the warm food, the private space, the roof over my head. But I can’t help but draw comparisons. It’s like my mind drifts to my guys whenever it has the opportunity to.
I peek through the peephole of the door, and my heart skips a beat.
I was expecting the director’s assistant, or maybe another omega who works at the center. Those have been the only visitors I’ve had recently and I’ve been grateful the Director has kept his word that this area and space will be as safe as he can make it.
But it’s not.
I wrench open the door to see Charlotte’s bright smile, her apple pie scent swirling around me.
“Surprise!” She says, stepping aside.
I blink quickly, feeling the burn of tears behind my eyes.
Standing there are my guys. All four of them.
I notice the dark circles under their eyes and how everyone but Chase hasn’t shaved in a while. There’s a sort of heaviness that surrounds all of them like a cloud that wasn’t there before.
Some of that heaviness lifts when they catch sight of me.
Despite that, there’s still a wave of uncertainty that keeps my feet rooted to the floor underneath me. There’s doubt of their feelings towards me, after everything that’s happened .
There are certainly other omegas they can choose from. Omegas that would be far easier to court. Omegas that wouldn’t require a lengthy selection process. Omegas without a dirty past like mine.
“Hey there, Moonlight,” Chase says, his voice warm and his smile bright as he opens his arms to me.
His smile melts away all my hesitation and I throw myself into his arms. I sink into his ocean scent as he spins me around in his arms, holding me tightly to him.
“You have no clue how happy we are to see you,” Chase whispers into my hair. “No idea. I swear, it’s been hell without you.” He pulls back and looks down into my eyes. “So no need to look at us like that.”
I bite the inside of my cheek. “Look like what?”
Am I that easy to read?
I guess I am. Plus, the four of them have always been able to read my emotions well.
“Like you’re expecting us to walk away from you,” Madden says from behind me, wrapping both Chase and I into his arms.
I feel instantly cocooned in both of their strength and melt into them.
“That’s not going to happen,” Madden adds.
I turn my head back up and look up at Madden’s face, diving into his warm chocolate-colored eyes. I reach up and slowly trace the space between his eyebrows, trying to brush away the tension I see there. His expression softens.
I turn to the side and see Kane, his smile soft as he watches Madden and Chase embrace me. I squeeze Madden and Chase and they let me go.
I instantly run into Kane’s arms too.
“I was just thinking about you. The couch I have in this apartment sucks. I miss your couch,” I sob, unable to hold back my tears any longer.
It’s such a silly thing to say to him, especially as the first thing, but I can’t help it. The words come spilling out before I can stop them.
He chuckles, slowly stroking my head as he tucks me into his chest.
“I’ve missed you so much,” I whisper under my breath.
I’ve missed Kane’s quiet companionship. Without his presence, silence is so incredibly overwhelming.
I pull back, seeing the tear stains I’ve left on Kane’s long-sleeved button-up shirt, and let out a small gasp, frantically wiping at the fabric. It doesn’t do anything and I let out a little whine of alarm.
“Hey,” Kane says, gently grabbing my wrist and keeping me from pawing at him anymore. “It’s okay. Don’t worry about it.”
“Are—are you sure?” I whisper, wiping away at the tears still left on my face.
“I’d take this shirt and throw it into a fire right now if it would help you,” he whispers. “You have nothing to worry about.”
I relax into his hold, a smile appearing on my lips.
Kane takes a step back and nods towards Archer, who’s been standing back patiently this entire time, his hands in the pockets of his dark slacks. When I flash him a smile, his eyes light up and he rushes to me.
He wraps his arms around me, pulling me into his chest. He clings to me like he’s been stuck in a storm, swept away from shore by the currents and I’m his salvation.
“You’re here,” he whispers under his breath, almost like he’s trying to reassure himself.
“I’m here,” I say, dancing my fingertips along the fabric spread across his broad shoulders.
“I’m so fucking sorry.” His face is buried in my hair, keeping me from seeing his expression. When I try to pull back and see his face, he holds me tighter. “Wait. Please. Don’t—don’t go.” His voice cracks and part of my heart feels like it’s cracking along with it .
I’ve never seen Archer like this. I never even imagined Archer could be like this.
He always seemed so strong, so in control, so confident.
He’s felt a bit larger than life, ever since I first set eyes on him when he burst through the door of Madden’s bedroom, seeing me naked and trembling, presenting myself.
When he pulls his face away from the crook of my neck, I finally get to see his face and my heart breaks a little bit more.
All of them seem a lot more tired than usual. Archer though? He seems worn down to the bone. The shadows under his eyes are dark and combined with his sharp jaw, he almost looks gaunt.
I lift a hand to his cheek, my thumb lightly brushing over his skin.
“Are you alright?” I ask, unable to keep the concern from my voice.
“I should be asking you that,” he says, reaching up to keep my hand against his face and closing his eyes briefly. “You’re the one who’s been through hell and back.”
“I’m doing a lot better now that you all are here,” I say, taking a second to meet all of their eyes and memorize their scents.
“Sorry to break up this reunion,” Charlotte says, holding the door to my apartment open. “But I think we should move this inside. It’s a lot warmer inside.”
Archer still clings to me, not wanting to let me go, almost like he’s scared if he does, he’ll lose me. I lace my hand into his, giving him a reassuring smile before taking a step towards the inside of my apartment.
“You’ve got a good point,” I say to Charlotte, smiling brightly at her. “It’s really good to see you.”
“It’s good to see you too, Luna.” She says.
“What’re you doing here?”
“I’m your chaperone! Technically, you’re not supposed to be alone with any alphas unless supervised, but the director made an exception, so I get to be here instead of some random other person.” Her expression grows a bit more sober. “We have so much to talk about, Luna.”
The space in my apartment that felt so big just a couple of minutes ago now feels absolutely tiny. The little dining table I have has two chairs, which Madden helps carry to the living room so everyone has space to sit.
Archer pulls me onto his lap as he sits down in the armchair. His spicy cinnamon scent wraps itself around me, making all of my muscles relax like some sort of soothing balm.
Chase and Kane manage to fit themselves on the sofa. I almost let out a giggle when I see Madden balancing himself on the small dining room chair.
This apartment was definitely made with an omega in mind. There aren’t even any shelves that I can’t reach.
Despite how cramped everything is, it’s still so comforting having the pack here.
Charlotte makes her way to the second chair that Madden brought over, cradling her pregnant belly in her hands and huffing when she sits down. I’m so grateful she’s willing to be here, despite how far along she is. I bet she’d much rather be at home in her nest with her mates than here.
“This place is pretty nice,” Chase says, his head on a swivel, taking everything in. “How’re you settling in?”
I bite the inside of my cheek. “Not—not well. I—I miss you all.”
“We’ve missed you too,” Archer murmurs, his breath tickling my neck. “So much.”
“Really? Even—even after finding out everything that happened to me?” My eyes drop to the floor. I can’t meet any of their gazes. I’m too afraid the reminder of everything they know about me will make them angry at me.
“What? Why would that change anything?” Madden asks, his voice soft and hesitant, almost like he’s afraid I’m going to fall apart .
That’s when I notice my hands are trembling in my lap and my perfume has gone sour with my stress.
“You—you have plenty of other omegas you could have that aren’t—that aren’t damaged like I am.”