Chapter 34
THIRTY-FOUR
DALLAS
Despite how good things have been this past week since I finally dealt with my shit and apologized to Haven at Noah’s birthday, there’s been a gnawing feeling in my stomach that I just can’t ignore.
It’s been there since I woke up this morning, almost warning me of what’s to come.
I just can’t figure out what that could be.
Since we have a game in a few days, today’s practice is going to be a real bitch because we’re going up against a team that has a perfect season so far.
But so do we. So, on Friday, we’ll have to determine who really is the better team.
Coach feels the pressure of that, and when he feels pressured and a game means a lot to him, I think the rest of us all feel that too.
Coach looks at all of us, sweeping his eyes around the half circle we’ve formed around him. “Go get some water, boys,” he finally says. “You’re all moving about as fast as my grandmother today.” His eyebrows lift. “She uses a walker.”
I wait for the first few to break away from the group before trailing behind. Noah and I are both playing fine, as are about half the others. But a bunch of them? They downright suck today.
“Next time, take it easy on the shots, would ya man?” I hear one of them say in front of me to his buddies. “When I left that party at ten, you two were ripping.”
He shakes his head, smirking at two of our main defensive backs, and my fists ball up at my sides. Pulling my helmet off, I can’t stop my mouth from running.
“Real fucking cute, you dumbasses,” I growl from behind them, making them tense.
“We’ve got a huge game this week. Practice is going to be hell anyway, and now we can add an extra layer of shittiness because you want to party like you’re frat guys.
” I can’t even look at their faces, so I walk around them, heading for my water.
“Sorry, Rivers,” one says nervously, but I don’t acknowledge it.
I understand that for some, this shit is all about memories and having fun. It’s not like that for me, though, because being here means so much to me and my parents. I just want to do well, and this is a team sport. I can’t have part of the team fucking off.
“Jeez Louise,” Noah utters, nudging my side before grabbing his water bottle. “Who pissed in your Cheerios this morning?”
Noah may take football seriously, but he’s also the guy everyone can count on to bring a good time. He tries his best and is one hell of a player, but if a few plays get fucked up along the way, he’s not going to get shaken up over it.
I wish I was like that.
“No one,” I say honestly, because up until practice began, I was in a great mood. I should be now, too, but I want to win the game. And to do that, we need to be prepared.
“Now that that’s settled, I have a question for ya,” he rattles off, grinning like an absolute idiot. “Since I was cool with you dating my sister and all, even though it’s pretty gross …”
“Get to it, King,” I mutter.
“Right.” He nods. “Okay, so, Gigi is cute. Actually, she’s smoking, but she’s also cute. And I just wondered, well, I was curious—”
“You can’t hook up with Gigi Jacobs, Noah,” I say, cutting him off. “She’s a good girl. Like … a really, really good girl. She’d never go for it.”
“What is that supposed to mean?” he asks, sounding insulted. A tone I’ve rarely heard on him.
I’m quiet for a moment, not really sure how to go about saying what I mean without hurting his feelings. He may be the happiest-go-lucky dude, but he’s sensitive too.
I know what type of girls my best friend likes. The ones who leave the next morning without being asked. The ones who use him just as much as he uses them. He likes a woman who’s okay with him calling her when he’s drunk, even if he hasn’t called in months.
He’s … a bit of a playboy on campus, but he has the biggest heart. Still, he isn’t what Gigi is looking for. That much I know.
“She isn’t going to be the type to just hook up, Noah,” I say, shrugging. “I don’t know her all that well, but the time I’ve spent at The Nest? Well, I know that much about her at least.”
I swear his head almost hangs and his shoulders slump slightly. Finally, he sets his water bottle down and plasters on his usual shit-eating grin, though it’s less broad now.
“All right, enough serious talk. Let’s go finish this practice,” he says, smacking my arm. “Try not to suck.”
“Fuck off,” I mumble, rolling my eyes at him but chuckling.
We walk back toward the field, well aware that the teammates I scolded minutes ago are trailing behind with their tails between their legs.
Good, maybe next time they’ll take their spot seriously.
HAVEN
I dress quickly, knowing I probably should blow my hair dry so that it’ll look good tomorrow too, but I’m too damn lazy to actually do it.
Glancing at my watch, I have an hour until I need to meet Dallas for dinner, but before that, I’m in desperate need of a run to the sporting goods store for some new turf shoes because mine are so worn out that it’s actually pathetic.
As much as he rolled his eyes for this, Dallas also smiled when I told him that I wanted to take him out to dinner tonight to celebrate him taking the first step to set up testing to see if he qualifies for any accommodations.
I just wanted to make sure I kept it a very positive thing and remind him how proud I am of him.
So many of his self-esteem issues when it comes to his ability to learn come from his childhood.
I hate that his father made him feel like he isn’t smart and question his own abilities, but I’m going to do everything I can to make sure he knows that he is intelligent and capable.
And that it’s okay to need some extra help because not everyone learns the same way.
If everyone did, how boring would that be?
Because at the end of the day, it’s the out-of-the-box thinkers who are pushing boundaries and making names for themselves.
And as nerdy as it may sound, I can’t wait to see how great Dallas does once he finds the learning plan that he should have had years ago.
After brushing my hair out, I squirt some product into my palm before I drag my fingers through and scrunch it.
I sort of look like a drowned rat, but it’s fine.
Next, I apply a quick layer of moisturizer, a touch of bronzer, a few sweeps of my favorite mascara, and complete this I am rushed look by smearing gloss over my lips as a finishing touch.
Looking at myself once more, I shrug. “That’ll do it, I guess.”
Rushing around the room, I find my phone and my Birkenstocks, but before I can turn to leave, the sound of the door gently closing has the hair on the back of my neck standing up because no one else is home. At least, last I knew, I was alone.
Whirling around, I don’t even know the feeling that’s washing over my entire being when I’m met face to face with Tabor. He leans with his back against the door, almost as a silent way of telling me I’m trapped.
“You look so pretty when you’re fresh out of the shower, baby,” he says, his eyes roaming my body and making my stomach hurt. “It’s almost as if you knew I was coming to see you.”
Unhurriedly, and not wanting to tip him off, my eyes peer to the side, looking at the window to gauge how many steps away it is. But of course, I’m too fucking obvious, and when my eyes move back to him, his are narrowed.
“Don’t even think about trying to run, Haven,” he demands darkly, reaching into the front pocket of his hoodie and pulling it back, just enough for me to see that he has a gun. “The only way you’re getting out of here is with me.”
My teeth chatter together, and tears sting the backs of my eyes. I’m a brave person—at least, I think I am. Right now, though, I’m so scared that I feel like my body is stuck in one spot.
He has a gun. I’m so screwed.
“So grab a bag and pack your shit,” he commands me coldly, but when I don’t move—because truthfully, I can’t—he pulls the gun out a little more.
“I said grab a bag and pack your fucking shit, Haven. I’m not playing around.
You’ve made a fool out of me already, so I suggest you listen and follow along like a good girl unless you want this to end badly. ”
A whimper slips from my lips, and even though it feels like my feet are in quicksand, step by step, I walk to where my suitcase is sitting in the corner of my room and grab it. With shaky hands, I put it on the bed, but once again, I freeze.
If I go with him … will anyone find me? Will I ever see my family again?
Will I ever see Dallas again?
That last thought alone rips a sob from my throat because he needs me. After everything he went through with his parents as a kid, I can’t bear the thought of him thinking I just … left him one day.
Suddenly, the barrel of the gun is pressing into my back, and his chin is pressing into my shoulder.
“Hurry the fuck up, Haven,” Tabor spits.
When he inhales against me sharply, I want to throw up.
“It’s going to be so good for us to be away from everyone else, baby.
I promise.” The gun remains pressed into my back, and he speaks against my ear.
“Just throw some shit into the suitcase so we can go, and I won’t hurt you, okay? ”
The last thing I want to do right now is cry in front of him, and yet here I am, crying so hard that my entire body shakes. My teeth chatter together as I walk to my dresser, him still right behind me, keeping the gun against my shirt.
I throw random things into the suitcase mindlessly. I don’t even know if it’s stuff I actually wear or need because my vision is blurred as my mind swirls. I feel like I’m on a spinning ride that’s turning out of control, and there’s no way off it.
“Good, Haven,” he murmurs against my ear before suddenly, he drags his nose down my jaw and kisses my neck.
Everything inside me is saying to scream, but there’s no one home. The same thought keeps running through my head. And that’s how much it will hurt Dallas if I die today.
I don’t want to be another thing Dallas Rivers has to survive. And if I never agreed to tutor him … if I’d never let him get close enough to love me, it wouldn’t have affected him nearly as much as it will now.
When one hand snakes around, fingertips digging into my waist, I want to throw up. I never imagined that Tabor would be this type of monster, but until today, I didn’t think he’d hold me at gunpoint either. I hate that I have to do what I do next, but I fear what will happen if I don’t.
“Hey,” I say, gently nudging my shoulder upward to push him back.
“We’ll have plenty of time for that later, but I should probably finish packing before someone gets home.
” The words don’t come out nearly as strong as I wish they would, and when I crane my neck to see if he bought it, for a second, I think I’m screwed.
His eyes roam my face, looking for a sign I’m lying, no doubt. Finally, his lips turn up at the corner slightly, and his smile itself makes me cringe.
“One kiss then?” he murmurs, dipping his face closer to mine, and my teeth chatter so loudly that I have to force my mouth to stay shut before I nod.
Closing my eyes—because there’s no way I can kiss him let alone watch him during it—he brings his mouth to mine.
He tries to intensify it, but I keep my mouth firmly closed, though I press my lips to his to sell it as well as I can before I pull back slightly.
Swallowing back my own vomit, I do my best to smile at him, though I’m not sure how well I sell it.
“I’ll finish packing so we can go,” I say, my voice squeaky.
He moves the gun from my back, though he still crowds me, as if he thinks I’ll run. Which is smart, because if I had the chance to, I would.
I have one of the fastest times from home plate to first base in college softball. Once I get my opportunity to bolt, I’m going to take it. Unfortunately, right now isn’t it.
“Okay, baby,” he mutters, kissing my cheek.
“Finish packing so we can get out of here.” Shocking me, he steps back and takes a seat on the bed, though he keeps the gun right beside him.
“You’re going to love the place I found for us to go.
No one will bother us. We can finally be happy—just the two of us. ”
I turn back toward the dresser, grabbing a few more items and inhaling a quiet, deep breath to try to calm myself down.
“That sounds great,” I whisper, though my voice cracks, so I know I need to get my act together and add onto it. “I can’t wait.”
While he talks about this place we’ll be going all alone, and how good it’ll be for us, I let my mind take me away, just for a moment, to this morning when I was safe in Dallas’s arms. It seemed like it was going to be such a great day even though I didn’t want him to have to get out of bed because we were so comfy.
When my eyes open, and I look down at the suitcase, I’m reminded of how this day changed so quickly. It went from being an ordinary one to now … the worst day of my life.