Chapter 23
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
Sloane
“ R eady, Ms. Sloane?” Dante asks me, and I pull from my chaotic thoughts, looking at where he has the SUV door held open for me.
“Sorry, yeah.” I grab the flowers and chocolates Luca brought me and my bag, step out, and follow Dante inside the apartment building.
“You alright?” he asks as I open the apartment and push inside.
“Yeah, just…” I sigh, not having the words to explain what I am and what’s happening in my head.
He nods. “I understand. It can’t be easy to be falling for a man like him. One you can’t fully have unless you ruin him on his way into your arms.”
His words sink through me, and they couldn’t be more accurate. Emotion claws at my throat so thickly that I can’t swallow around it.
Dante picks up on the effect of his words, and his eyes grow apologetic. “I’m sorry, Ms. Sloane. I didn’t mean to… I have a way of putting my foot in my goddamned mouth every time I open it, or so my wife says.”
I smile, his admittance making me feel lighter. But he wasn’t wrong.
“It’s alright. You’re not wrong. Though I know I could never have him, it’s still… I’ve never felt like I do around him. And it’s stupid even to be having this emotional dilemma amidst the shit show my life is lately, but I can’t help it.”
Dante shrugs. “I think love comes when we least expect it. Turmoil be damned.”
I nod in agreement as I put the flowers into a vase. They’re beautiful, and I can’t stop looking at them. While it was the smallest gesture to some, I’ve had no one buy me flowers before, and my heart soared when he handed them to me.
“Orchids,” Dante says, approaching the island where I’m getting them into a vase.
“That’s what they are?” I ask.
He nods. “They have many meanings, one being love and one being strength. I think the father likely picked them because of that. Flowers are a language all their own,” he finishes, and my heart is pounding.
I work open the box of chocolates, taking a caramel-filled and sliding the box across the island towards Dante.
He bites his bottom lip as he decides which he wants, settling for a strawberry cream, popping it into his mouth in one go, and closing his eyes as the flavors hit his tongue.
While I know Dante is an enforcer for Ardesia and the Ricci family, I find him refreshing and kind—the contrasted opposite to his predecessor, who’s now the Don of the Ricci family.
“Why didn’t you tell me it was your birthday?” Dante asks when silence falls between us as I put the lid back on the chocolate box.
I shrug. “My birthday isn’t something I’ve ever celebrated. My parents were always high or fighting, and I usually bought myself a cupcake and sat outside the store down from our apartment with Mary…”
“Mary?”
I wince, knowing I’ve given him a scrap of my past I’ve never shared with anyone.
“A homeless woman who used to sleep in front of the store. I’d share my cupcake with her, and she’d sing me Happy Birthday.” I wipe a tear off my face.
Someone who’s turning twenty-one should be happier than I am, right?
So much dread lives in my bones, fight-or-flight swimming in my body twenty-four-seven. It’s no way to fucking live, but what other option is there in my world?
Dante rounds the island and pulls me into him. “I’m sorry you’ve had to grow up how you did. But that’s your past. You’re standing here today, strong and beautiful; your past makes you who you are. You wouldn’t exist without it.”
I nod, sobbing into his chest and throwing myself a small pity party as he holds me tightly.
His chest rumbles as he sings ‘ Happy Birthday’ to me. I cry into his shirt, which smells like spiced cologne and cigarettes.
His kindness only makes me cry even harder.
When he’s done singing, I pull back, look up at him through my blurry eyes, and manage a smile. “Thank you, Dante.”
He nods. “Of course.”
His phone goes off, and he pulls it from his pocket, walking toward the door as he picks it up. “Yeah, Boss?”
The apartment door shuts as he walks into the hall.
I look toward the orchids, emotion swirling deep in my gut at the gesture of two men who barely know me tonight, which has made my birthday the best I’ve ever had.
I climb into bed and open my phone to see that Myra hasn’t texted me Happy Birthday. Then, I curl into myself.
My phone dings and I quickly pull it back to me, sliding it open.
Hey, it’s Brynne. I thought you might want this. But if you don’t, I apologize.
There’s a contact with Luca’s name attached to the text.
Father Russo, it reads, and I swallow as I click open the contact link, saving it to my phone.
For the longest time, I lay on the bed in silence, letting the heavy moment I’d had with Dante settle through my body.
Grabbing my phone, I open the messages app and make a new one with Luca’s contact information at the top of it. I write one out before I can overthink it and hit send quickly.
Thank you for my birthday gifts. You have no idea how much they meant to me.
I don’t have to wait long; the bubble showing he’s typing pops up, and I pull up to sit with my back against the headboard. I chew at my thumbnail as I watch the bubble move up and down for what seems like forever.
You deserved more than I gave you. I hope you had a fantastic day, Sloane.
I still feel too raw from the moment with Dante, but it feels good to have my walls down some, even if I don’t like admitting it.
I did. And it was thanks to you. And Dante.
Dante? What did that fool do now?
I can’t help the laugh that barrels out of me. While Dante is sweet and kind, he seems to be the menace who’s a thorn in his boss’s side, too.
He helped me see I should be celebrated.
Well, then, for once, he’s not being a pain in the ass.
There you go, cursing again.
What’s my sin count at now?
I smile as I toy with what to say back.
I think your slate has been wiped clean, Father Russo.
Has it? Whatever for?
For giving a sad girl flowers on her birthday.
You’ve rendered me speechless, Ms. Collins.
Damn, I made a priest stop preaching? I should get some recognition.
Ouch, I don’t talk that much, do I?
I was joking with you. But I mean, it’s in the job title.
I lie down, turning on my side with a massive smile as I snuggle in. I feel more connected to him now that I’m texting back and forth, even if it’s mundane and nonsensical. Sometimes, those are the best conversations to have with a friend.
I guess it is. Well, I’m glad you liked your gifts, Sloane. I wish I could give you the world.
I don’t think God would like you to give away something he worked so hard on.
I can almost see his smile through the phone.
No, I think you’re right. He wouldn’t. Happy Birthday, beautiful girl. Goodnight.
Goodnight, Father Russo.
I feel a million pounds lighter as I lock my phone and close my eyes. I’m toying with fire, and I know it. I need to leave him and the entire situation alone. But I can’t.
I decide he and I can be friends as sleep comes for me.
And that’ll have to be enough.
The next few days go by, and I’m in a haze. I text with Luca every moment I can. There are miles between us, and it feels less like we’re breaking some unbreakable covenant. I tell him things I’ve told no one else, and he confides in me how he was already wavering in his faith before he learned I was missing.
Even though he’s on the other side of the city, I feel closer to him now than I did before I climbed out of the rectory window and returned to my life.
Dante swaps in and out with Lorenzo, the other bodyguard charged with watching me. Lorenzo doesn’t seem to enjoy having to watch me when I have shifts at the club, but the girls love him, to his dismay.
He’s very solemn and grumpy, but he’s kind to me when it’s just him and I.
“Do you want the last egg roll?” I ask Lorenzo as I pack the Chinese boxes to take to the trash.
“No, Ms. Sloane, I can’t fit it in my belly even if I tried.
I smirk, taking it to the counter to put in the fridge.
I hear Lorenzo pausing the television. We’ve been watching The Walking Dead together, and even though I think it’s boring, his banter as we move through the seasons is enough to keep me watching it.
Luca has been preoccupied with remodeling and repairs at the church today, and we haven’t texted because of it. I can’t deny I feel anxious each time I check my phone, and he hasn’t texted. I’ve become addicted to my phone, which I’ve never been to before.
Myra remembered it was my birthday two days later and swore she would come and make it up to me, but half of me knew she said that to make herself feel better.
My life feels better without her in it, if I’m honest.
Though, I can’t pinpoint why. Maybe we’re just growing apart, and I’ve been going through too much lately that she can’t understand.
“Boss?” Lorenzo says, picking his phone up on the first ring. He stands, and my heart sinks as I stare at him for any sign of what’s wrong. “On it. I’ll be there as fast as I can.”
“What’s happened?” I ask as Lorenzo grabs what I now know as my go bag. Dante made me pack it the first day he was assigned to me.
“Barone made a move on a few of Brynne’s men. We have to move you. It was only two blocks away. We can’t risk it,” he says, and as he grabs my arm and makes for the door with me in tow, I grab my phone off the counter as we pass.
“But we have to shut the apartment down. Lorenzo, slow down. You’re scaring me,” I admit.
Fear shoots through me like a lightning storm, and there’s not much I can do to tamp it down.
“Look at me, Sloane. You’re to stay behind me. Do you understand me? If I fall, you take my gun and run like fucking hell. You got me? You’re a survivor; I saw it in you the day I met you; you can do this.”
I swallow over a lump building in my throat as I nod.
“You ready?” he asks as the elevator he’d shoved me inside opens on the first floor.
Even though I haven’t answered, he pushes out into the lobby, gun drawn.
“Whoa, man, what the hell?” the desk man says, his hands raised in defense.
I reach for Lorenzo, grasping at him for safety, holding onto the back of his shirt as he moves us toward the door.
I can see the SUV parked on the side of the street, but the few steps it’ll take to get there in the open air have me the most nervous I’ve ever been in my entire life.
We exit the street, and the first crack of a gun sounds through the night.
Lorenzo grabs and opens the door to the SUV, shooting his gun over the top of it blindly in the direction the gunshot had come from.
I jump in and slide over to accommodate him.
“Get in, Lorenzo!” I shout, tears streaming down my face as his breathing grows ragged.
He manages to get inside and slumps into my lap. The door is still open as the driver speeds off from the curb, and I hold on to Lorenzo for dear life.
“Help!” I shout to the driver. “Where is he hit?! Fuck! Help!” I cry in shrieks as my hand finds a wound at his side and presses into it with every ounce of strength that I have.
Lorenzo’s eyes frantically meet mine. “You’re going to be okay. You’re a survivor. Do you hear me? You’re going to be okay!” I shout as I press into his wound.
He nods at me, eyes locking on mine.
His phone rings in his pocket as the driver takes a corner quickly. I work it out of his front pocket, and I slide it open, blood swiping across the screen as I do so. “Ardesia, help!” I sob.
“Where is he hit?” he asks, already judging what’s happened by the tone of my voice and frantic pleads.
“His side, beneath his armpit. We need help.”
“We have to make sure you’re safe first,” he starts, but I cut him off.
“No! He needs fucking help. Fuck my safety, Lorenzo needs help, aren’t you listening to me?!” My body is shaking as I try to press into his wound as I hold the phone in my bloody hand.
“Alright, instruct the driver to take you to safe house F. I’ll have the surgeon meet you there.”
I shout the instructions to the driver, and he nods once, turning around and nearly hitting a truck in his wake.
Lorenzo looks as if he’s growing weary, and I scream at him to stay awake.
“Stay with me,” I cry, tears mixing with sweat from adrenaline on my skin.
The door still lies open, the chilly air of the coming winter rushing past, but it’s not enough air to breathe. Because in this SUV, barreling down the city streets, I’m holding a man who’s toeing the line of death.
“Hurry!” I scream as the driver gases it.
Lorenzo keeps his eyes on mine as I let the phone drop from my face.
I close my eyes and pray for the first time in my life.