Chapter 67
My muscles hurt so bad. I try to swallow but my mouth is dry and my throat feels like I’ve been eating hot sand. When I stretch, I feel a tug on my left arm. Peeling my eyes open feels like I’m doing it for the first time. My head is pounding and everything swims around me.
Beep.beep.beep.
I squint trying to see something, anything around me. It’s so bright.
“Hey…Relax. I’m here.” Evan. Evan’s here.
“Where’s here?” I croak. My throat is on fire.
I grip my stomach and cover my mouth, the tugging on my arm is back.
“Hold on, here. ” Evan says, holding something in front of me.
I hurl into it, gripping my stomach, breathing through my nose as the nausea ebbs and my throat burns.
“I’ll get the nurse.” Someone else says. Was that Archer? Everything sounds like it’s a million miles away, behind a thick wall. It’s all muffled. And where the hell am I?
I hear footsteps approaching what feels like hours later.
“Yeah she was up and vomiting.” Archer…
“Olivia…Can you hear me?” The woman has a soft voice. I nod slowly, but the motion makes me dizzy and shooting pain up my back.
“Do you know where you are?” The lady asks me.
I shake my head, which causes my head to spin again, a wave of nausea falling over me.
I try to sit upright but my arms are so sore.
I can just make out Evan pushing the same object to me again.
Maybe it’s a trash can. A heavy, warm hand rubs circles on my back, just between my shoulder blades. It feels so nice.
I groan and slouch forward. The nausea subsiding.
“You’re at Haverhill Medical. By the looks of it you might have a concussion.” The woman, a nurse, finally says.
“Hospital?” I strangle out.
“Do you know what day it is?” She asks, bypassing my question.
I rack my brain. Monday, it’s Monday. I had class this morning. “It’s Monday.” My voice is hoarse.
There’s movement and someone clears their throat.
“Liv…” Evan is speaking to me now. “It’s Tuesday babe.”
I blink several times. The movement is slow, my eyelids heavy. I shake my head trying to clear the fog. Where did the rest of Monday go?
“No. It’s Monday.” I tell them. I swallow again and wince.
“Can she have water?” Silas’ pleading voice comes from my left. I look over to find him sitting in a chair next to me.
“Just a little, yes.” The nurse responds.
A white foam cup is placed to my lips and I take a small sip. The cool liquid runs down my throat, feeling like the first thing I’ve had since spending a month in a desert.
“Better?” A hand strokes down my hair, soft and gentle. It’s Archer asking so maybe his hand? Why is everything so blurry?
“I’ll be back with the doctor.” The nurse says. Her footsteps get quieter as she leaves.
As the door clicks shut, I glance around the room, squinting, my vision starting to work for me. Evan, Silas, Archer, Rafe…Their eyes flick between each other, but no one meets mine.
My chest tightens as I try to make sense of the room.
Evan…Rafe…Silas…Archer. They all feel different somehow, but I can’t place my finger on it.
My legs ache, arms weighed down by invisible force.
Small movements make me dizzy and nauseous.
The only noise to break the silence is the beep of my heart monitor.
My brows furrow at the sight of white bandages wrapped around my wrists.
I can’t help but notice the way everyone looks ready to bolt into action.
Evan is close, hovering. Archer's hand hasn’t left my hair.
Silas looks like he’s going to fall apart at the seams, and Rafe.
Rafe is standing by the door, arms crossed as if he’s guarding it.
But, it’s as if he’s guarding it from someone leaving, not entering.
I move to sit up straighter and wince. My fingers find my forehead and they flinch back as I touch something sore. I feel several stitches in a short line.
“What…what happened?” I ask, my voice weak and hoarse. I reach for the water cup.
I don’t miss the way no one answers me. Silas’ gaze has fallen to the ground, his fingers laced in front of him, his leg won’t stop bouncing.
Archer has stopped stroking my hair, his gaze towards Evan at the edge of my bed. Rafe stands as still as a statue, eyes trained on the tv that isn’t even on.
I look at Evan. At least he’s looking at me.
“We’re really glad you’re awake.” He tells me.
I shake my head. This all feels like a foggy dream. “I …I don’t understand. What happened?” I ask again. “Why am I here?” I repeat a little more frustrated. I’m laying in a hospital bed, no idea how I got here and no one will tell me anything.
Evan’s eyes search mine but he stays quiet. Silas’ hands are now tangled in his hair. His leg is bouncing so furiously I’m worried he might put a hole in the floor. I don’t bother to look at Rafe. He hasn’t moved. Archer’s hand is no longer gentle. It feels more like he’s fighting to not let go.
“What happened?” I demand but my voice is so weak and fragile. I can’t remember anything after I got off the phone with Rafe. My hands have turned to fists at my side.
“WHAT HAPPENED?!” I shout.
A soft knock lands on the door before anyone can answer. The door swings open and a nurse, maybe the one from before, steps in with a doctor just behind her and my parents just behind him. They close the door behind them. I watch as Rafe steps away, still not looking in my direction.
The doctor steps around the nurse and stops at the end of my bed.
His clipboard in hand, he flips a page scanning the information.
“Olivia, do you remember what happened Monday?” He asks me.
He barely even looks up from his clipboard, pen at the ready.
When I don’t say anything he finally looks up at me.
I’m confused at first, my brows furrowing.
“I went to school with Morella like usual. Made it through most of my classes. When I came out for lunch.” My throat tightens and burns at the memory.
Tears sting at the edges of my eyes but I blink them away.
“There were posters all over the school about a tragic event from my past.” I manage to choke out.
“Anything else?” He asks.
I hate this. Why do I need to relive all of that? I take a deep breath and continue. “I left school because I was upset. I went to the cemetery. Rafe called to check on me but I hung up.” I look down at my lap. “That’s all I remember.”
The doctor studies me for a moment. He writes a few more things on his clipboard and then rests it in front of him, crossing his hands.
“You were rushed to the emergency room Monday evening. You were suffering from severe blood loss and a possible concussion. You received several stitches to both wrists where the cuts were made. Luckily they were not deep and did not do any irreparable damage. You also received a few stitches for the head wound.” He points to my head with his pen.
I look down at my wrists. The clean white bandages starting to stain red. Most likely from my erratic movements.
“We’ve already spoken to your parents about treatment options. We’re placing you on a 72 hour hold. It’s mandatory based on the condition you came in for.”
“Treatment?” I shout. “I don’t need treatment!” My throat is raw at this point and my voice breaks.
The doctor just nods, turning to my parents. “I’ll let you have a moment with her.” My parents nod back at the doctor and thank him as he exits the room.
My dad steps to the end of my bed and looks around the room. “Boys, can you give us a moment with our daughter please.”
I see Rafe nod at my father as he uncrosses his arms and steps out of the room. Archer's hand falls away from my head, leaving a cold spot where his warmth was. Evan rises off the bed and looks at Silas. Who hasn’t moved.
He’s shaking his head. His fingers are laced and pressed to his lips. His leg is bouncing erratically still.
Evan steps over calmly and places a hand on his shoulder. “Come on man.”
Silas shakes his head again. “I’m not leaving her.” I see the pain in my dads eyes. My mother is wringing her hands at the foot of my bed. Eyes bloodshot, cheeks puffy and tear stained. She looks heart broken and completely torn apart.
“It’s just for a minute. We are only going right outside the door.” Evan gently tugs on Silas’ arm.
Silas sighs angrily and stands but doesn’t leave right away.
He looks down at me. The pain swirling in his eyes that are not sage green today but emerald green, breaks my heart.
He leans down and places a gentle kiss on the top of my head.
He stays like that for several seconds. Then walks out of the room with Evan. The door closes softly behind them.
“I didn’t do this.” I say softly. I lift my gaze. First to my dad, eyes red and puffy, hair wild. Then to my mother who is silent and watching.
“I didn’t do this.” I plead. “I was upset, yes but I didn’t do this.” I motion to my wrists. I’m grasping at air. “I…” My eyes bounce back and forth as I search my brain for fragments but there is nothing.
“Honey please.” Dad starts but mom cuts him off.
“You’re going to get treatment.” She says stiffly. “After your 72 hour hold you will be going to the treatment center.” Her eyes are rimmed red just like dads. Her lower lip wobbles but she holds her composure.
Dad sighs and hangs his head.
“Don’t make me go. I don’t need to.” I beg. “What about school? I’m almost done and I’m doing so well. My grades…” My words trail off as my voice trembles and tears collect in the corners of my eyes.
“I’m sorry sweetie. But you have to. We need you to go.” Dads eyes are pleading.
I hang my head and say nothing. I didn’t do this but I can’t stand to see him hurt any more than he already is. After I say nothing else they leave, my dad placing a kiss on my cheek before he goes. When they leave I finally hear my moms strength break and she sobs into my fathers arms.
The guys reenter the room, all taking their places from before.
When Silas takes his seat he takes my hand in his and just looks at me.
I look back scanning his face. He looks like he's been through hell. I keep looking him over and that’s when I notice the blood smeared all over his hoodie. My lower lip wobbles. What happened?
“They’re making me go to a treatment center.” My voice is quiet. “After my 72 hour hold.” Silas’ hand squeezes mine. No one says anything for a long time. “I didn’t do this.” I beg. After a long silence, Evan says, “Treatment is good.” and my brow knits.
“I don’t need treatment,” I snap at him.
His mouth opens like he wants to say something. He rubs the back of his neck then sighs. “Everyone can benefit from it. It’s not that big of a deal. 30 days is nothing.”
He’s trying to justify my parents' decision and I’m in utter shock.
“You’re allowed visitors and phone calls.” Archer chimes in. “It’ll fly by.”
I can’t believe what I’m hearing. My mouth hangs open for a split second. “I didn’t do anything.” I state matter of factly. I look around at all the guys, the men who are supposed to be mine and my composure slips again. The tears fall and I just let them. “Say you believe me…” I whisper.
“I didn’t say you did.” Evan retorts. “I just think it’s best if we get your parents off your back by you going.”
“Get her parents off her back?!” Rafe shouts. “Are you kidding me?!” He’s facing Evan, hands clenched. “Look at how we found her!”
Evan turns to Rafe. “She doesn’t need anyone upset right now, just calm down.”
“Calm down? Calm down? Are you fucking kidding me?!” Rafe runs his hand through his hair looking at Evan in disbelief. He throws one hand out in my direction. “Evan she was dying! Dead! They had to revive her! I don’t care, she needs help!”
A tormented sob is ripped from Silas' chest. His head drops to my hand as he holds it tight. His shoulders shake with his cries.
“Get out.” I say over his shouting.
Both Evan and Rafe look at me with shock written all over their faces.
“What?” I hear from my left.
“I said, get out. Evan, I want them out.” I yank my hand from Silas’.
No one moves, no one says anything. I can feel my tears hitting my blanket that lays across my lap.
A small strangled noise comes from my left. “Liv..” Tears are streaming down Silas’ face. “Please. I lost you once. I can’t lose you again.” His voice is tight and he reaches for my hand again but I pull away.
Evan lets out a breath and moves to stand at the door.
“Come on Si.” Rafe says, dragging him up by his arm. He’s reluctant to go and fights Rafe the whole way out. They leave the room without another word.
Archer hovers for a moment but I don’t look at him.
“Leave.” I say softly.
He doesn’t say anything before he turns and walks out of the room. Evan closes the door behind them, resting his forehead against it after it’s shut. We’re both quiet for a long time.
“Liv..” Evan waits but I don’t say anything. “Don’t be too hard on the guys. They’re just really scared and want what’s best for you.” He shakes his head, his eyes closed.
I look at him bewildered. “They’re scared?
” I raise my voice and fight against all the pain.
“They’re worried?” I repeat. “I’m the one who woke up in a hospital with my wrists stitched up, having no idea how it happened or how I got here?
!” I lift my arms and point my wrists at Evan.
“All I know is I didn’t do this! And I need them to trust me enough to believe what I’m saying, but they don’t.
” My voice breaks. “None of them believe me.”
He finally lifts himself off the door and looks at me with so much sadness it makes my emotions spill over. I drop my arms and cry into my hands. Evan comes to my bedside, sits with me and holds me until I fall asleep from exhaustion.