Chapter 33
Chapter Thirty-Three
Naomi
S am’s hand curves around my thigh and meets my center and not a second too soon. I gasp and moan as he circles my raging nerves, bucking my hips forward against his palm.
“Eager are we, princess?”
“Yes,” I moan out shamelessly, still chasing contact by driving my hips forward.
“Well, I suppose there’s not really any time to waste, huh?”
I bite my lip and refuse to follow his words into dark thoughts about what comes next. About how everyone will come home, and our little paradise will no longer be ours.
“That feels so good,” I say, spurring him forward instead.
I get what I’m asking for.
His fingers splay, spreading my sex wide open. I gasp as the air touches nerves that are usually so protected. Sam slides one finger down and teases around my entrance, slipping inside just enough to give me a taste of what’s coming. Then up and around again, tortuously slow.
When he enters me again, he does it with at least two fingers, stretching me open and grinding his palm into my clit as he slides in and out. His other hand drifts to my breast and he manages to get my nipple between thumb and forefinger as he uses his grip to keep me pressed close to his body.
I let my eyes drift down to watch his hand fucking me, mesmerized by the view. I’m so wet he slides in and out easily, the only sound in the room the soft squelch of his fingers penetrating my soaked pussy.
I’m going to come. There’s no stopping it now.
“Sammy…” I get out through clenched teeth.
“Look straight at the camera when you come, princess.”
Well, hell. If I wasn’t already on the edge, those words alone might have put me there.
I suck in a deep breath and blink rapidly a few times to clear away the wetness that’s gathered on my lashes while watching Sam finger fuck me. My focus lasers in on my phone’s camera, and I hold my gaze.
Right over the edge.
It’s all I can do not to buckle at my core as my orgasm overtakes me, but Sam’s strong arm keeps me upright. I moan and spasm on his hand, still grinding my hips downward, chasing the wave of pleasure that threatens to drown me.
All the while, I keep both eyes open and focused on the tiny lens.
The moment I still, Sam releases me, pussy first and then chest. I fall forward onto my hands, still panting, my eyes dropping closed for the first time in what feels like ages.
He doesn’t give me more than a split second to recover before he's forcing my body to rotate, moving me around ninety degrees so our bodies are now perpendicular with the dresser and the camera.
I brace myself for impact, but he just sits my butt back and down so it rests on the tops of his thighs. I can feel his stiff cock resting heavily on my lower back.
Sam reaches forward and gathers my long hair in one hand, twisting it into a sloppy ponytail and winding his fist in it once, twice.
He uses his new leash to pull my head back far enough that I spot the ceiling.
“Tell me to fuck you,” he says. His voice comes from outside my field of vision.
“Fuck me,” I manage to get out through my angled throat.
“I meant beg,” he says, unimpressed.
I’m dying to see the look that accompanies that kind of statement, but he’s holding me too tightly for me to move my head toward him.
“Please, Sammy. Please fuck me.”
“More.”
“I’m dying to have your cock inside me. I’m so wet for you. You did this to me. Now you have to fuck me. Please don’t make me wait.”
I hear a huffed laugh behind me. “You’re awfully good at begging, princess.”
With his free hand, Sam pushes my hips back up so I’m spread before him on all fours. He lifts up as well, keeping my hair in his tight fist as he lines his tip up with my entrance.
“Yes,” I moan as I feel him start to press into me.
Have I ever wanted anything as much as I want his cock right now?
After the build up of not getting him inside me the last two times, I worried he might draw this out, make me wait, or, god forbid, decide not to go all the way again.
That doesn’t seem to be a problem.
No waiting, no discussion, no condom wrappers or discussion of testing, just his fat tip stretching my body open.
I think I moan the entire time he slides slowly into me. I’m a lucky girl to be able to verify that later. Maybe even with Sam by my side.
I moan louder at the thought of watching this whole scene on video, just as he bottoms out.
“How does it feel to have me inside you, princess?”
“So good,” I manage.
“I shouldn’t be doing this.”
I clench my lip between my teeth as he slides out an inch and then pounds back in.
“It’s so wrong,” I agree, happy to dive into his game.
“So fucking wrong.”
He lets my hair go and my head drops forward as he slides himself all the way out. I can feel his tip teasing a circle around my entrance. I drop down to my elbows, allowing my body to splay further, praying it’s not over.
My prayers are answered by his cock sliding back inside.
“You are so off-limits, princess.”
I smile to myself at this forbidden love game. “Completely.”
“I shouldn’t even be here. I shouldn’t be sticking my dick in you. My bare fucking dick.”
He’s got my hips in both hands now, giving my body a few quick pumps. I can feel the energy rising as he gets himself worked up.
“I wanted your bare cock inside me. I wanted you to fill me up.”
“You begged for it,” he agrees in a growl, slapping my ass with a sharp crack as he bottoms out once more.
“Please, Sammy, fuck me harder.”
He obeys, gripping my hips as he fucks mercilessly into my body, pressing my face hard into the mattress.
“I’m going to fill you up, princess. Just like you wanted.”
I smile to myself as I brush enough hair off my face to see the camera. When this man said he was going to surprise me, I really had no idea what I was in for.
Color me shocked. In the best possible way.
“I’ve been thinking about doing this for so long,” Sam says behind me, hips driving himself deep into my body over and over. “But I never imagined it could feel so good. I’ve never felt so good in my entire life.”
I offer a clench of my internal muscles in response and smile to myself as he grunts.
Sam draws his tip to my shallow front wall and starts a slow, short massage. “This is where I touched you before. You like it there?”
I like it so, so much.
“Yes,” I whimper out, forcing myself to take a breath. I’m not ready to hold it yet. I’m not ready for this to be over.
Especially since I have no idea if it will ever happen again.
His hand reaches around to my clit, and my eyes shut, knowing I’ll never survive this.
“I’ve been waiting so long to feel you come around my cock, princess. Don’t make me wait.”
“Sam, I…” I want to beg him to go slower, but I can’t. I want to come so badly the words won’t form.
“You’re going to come for me like a good girl.” His fingers press into either side of my clit as he rocks my hips forward and back with the motion of his cock against my g-spot.
I couldn’t hold on now if my life depended on it.
“Sammy…” is all I can get out as I succumb to my orgasm.
There really is something different about coming when you’re filled up with cock. My body grabs the soft, rock-hard flesh of him and holds on for dear life as I roll through spasms of pleasure.
I can hear him barely holding on himself as I hold him tightly. He moans and curses in the most deliciously uncensored way.
I know for a fact that in this moment, this is the real Sam. There’s no hiding your true self at a moment like this.
I release him from my pussy death grip and suck in a breath as the moment passes. I feel his hand, wet from my orgasm, slide back up my hip and grip me once more.
Never in my life have I been more excited to feel someone finish. The thought of him preparing to fuck me till he comes, spilling his pleasure and his seed into my waiting body is doing things to me.
Things I wasn’t exactly prepared to feel.
I’ll be damned if Sam’s wild side hasn’t rubbed off on me a bit. I was just acting before, but the craving I’m feeling in every cell is no act.
“Fuck, you feel so good, princess. Are you ready for me to come inside you?”
“Yes,” I cry out, feeding my hips back against his thrusts with a gusto that I know is appreciated by his increased pace.
“I’m going to fill your sweet pussy,”
“Yes, Sammy,” I moan.
“I love it when you call me that. No one else calls me that. Only you.”
And with those words, he’s buckling above me, driving his cock as far as it will go and pulsing there, emptying himself into the vessel of my body.
I hold my breath as I savor the feeling of being merged with him. I want to hold on tight, but I know it won’t do any good. My eyes close to further narrow down my senses, allowing my skin to ramp up the sensations of his hands on my hips, allowing my nose to dance in the sweet, musky scent of the man moaning and panting above me.
Allowing my heart to expand with a rush of completely inappropriate feelings.
Feelings I'll just have to dispose of later, but for now I let them have their fun.
He pulls out only to shove back in a second later, drawing a gasp from my lungs as his tip slides through my sensitive flesh.
“You feel so good,” he murmurs as he slides himself centimeters in and out, refusing to give up the territory he so mercilessly conquered.
I wait, chest flat on the bed, arms splayed over my head, eyes still softly closed, and allow myself to enjoy the last of the pleasure chemicals rushing through my brain.
This is the best kind of high, and Sam is the absolute best drug.
I’ll never be able to go back to the person I was before this happened.
He slides out and comes to a seat on his heels behind me, hands still holding my hips. One hand slides down through my spread cheeks and over my rosebud, down to where my entrance must be gushing with the combination of our orgasms.
His fingers press shallowly into my body, and I hear his breathing catch. I’m dying to see what he’s doing, what his face looks like, but I relax knowing I'll have the chance later.
“This is so fucking hot,” he murmurs, fingers still moving in and out of me. “I’ve never done anything like this.”
“I’ve never let anyone do that,” I respond honestly. It’s never even been on the table before.
“Good,” he says. “I want it to be just me.”
I don’t know how to respond to that, so I say nothing.
“I know I shouldn’t have done it. I should have asked. But I don’t know if you could have stopped me. I don't know if I could have stopped myself. ”
“That’s not true, Sam.”
His wet fingers finally give up their task and slide over the round of my ass, up to my lower back. “What do you mean?”
He’s leaning over me, brushing the hair out of my face. I get my first glimpse of his smiling face since this all started. I smile back. “If I had told you to put on a condom, you would have.”
His smile widens, turning sheepish. “That’s true. I would’ve. You didn’t, though. I hope that’s okay.”
It’s a little late to be asking now, but I really don’t mind. “It’s okay. It’s better than okay. It was amazing.”
His eyes drift back down my body. “Yeah.”
“I need to roll over. Or straighten my legs. Or something.”
Sam jumps to the side, and I press my legs out straight, moaning in pleasure as my circulation returns. I roll a bit side to side, eyes closed, enjoying the delicious stretch. My body stills when I feel his hand on my belly, tracing around my navel and up to the lower tips of my ribs. Glancing down, I watch his tanned finger outline my rib bones with slow, intentional movements.
Shifting my gaze to his face, my breath is taken away by what I find there. Gone is my dirty talking, bossy bedmate, replaced once more by the sweetest man who’s ever lived. And the look that he’s giving my body right now could only be described as reverence.
How come every time we’re together, it feels like he’s about to say this thing between us is real? Maybe that’s just wishful thinking on my part.
“What are you thinking about?” I ask, just to break the silence, the spell of this heavy moment.
Sam’s eyes drift up to mine, and when our gazes meet, I know I made the wrong choice. Nothing he’s about to say is going to lighten the moment one bit.
“I was thinking about when we were out raking in my yard. I was watching you, you know. Whenever you weren’t looking in my direction.” His gaze drops back down to my stomach as his hand resumes tracing circles around my navel, one side and then the other.
“I’ve been working alone in that yard for a lot of years. It felt good to have someone out there with me. Someone to shower with and curl up on the couch with afterward.” He bites his lip as he watches his finger travel across my skin. “I’ve just been alone for a long time.”
I shift so I can see his face better, see where his hand is resting on my stomach. My heart aches with longing for this man, but there’s no denying the wall that seems to be standing strong between us. If it wasn’t there, if it wasn’t so goddamn solid, his voice wouldn’t be so sad.
I close my eyes and sigh, unsure of how to respond. I can’t shake the feeling that this whole thing is out of my control. Like he’s a puppy I found lost in the woods and now I have to convince my parents to let me keep him. I somehow have to convince him it’s safe. Even when I don’t know that for sure.
I’m not used to letting such big, important decisions about my life be at the whim of other people. I’ve been independent for a long time. Too long. Much longer than I should have been at only thirty-two. It’s always been me looking out for myself.
Maybe this crazy, indecisive anxiety is just what it feels like to finally care about another person as much as I care about myself. I want Sam. I want him so badly it’s burning me alive.
But I also want him to be safe and happy and not crushed under the weight of my baggage.
I focus on the slow, steady movement of Sam’s finger on my belly to ground myself. As I watch, however, I start to see that he’s not drawing circles at all.
He’s tracing hearts.
I shift my hips suddenly so that I’m laying on my side, effectively tossing his hand from my stomach. He stretches out on his own side, gaze finally making it up to meet mine.
And it’s time to be brave.
“I’ve been alone for a long time, too. Most of my life. My mother…well, you know what happened to her. And my father never looked at me. I assumed it was because I look so much like her, but I’m not her. Dom was whatever, gone, busy. It was just me. I made it work. I made myself a life. I finally had something going. I trusted people.” I pause as my voice breaks, rolling back to my back, using both hands to wipe my face. Sam just waits for me to calm down. I can feel his gaze on me. “I don’t know what to do now. But I do know this. It feels good here. It feels safe.” I finally drop my eyes to meet his. “You feel safe. But I need that to be true for both of us.”
For a minute, I think Sam might cry as well, but then his deep look turns pensive. “I don’t know what happened to your mother.”
I feel the surprise hit my expression at his words, and I struggle to find a response.
“Do you?” Sam asks, seeing my hesitation.
This is not something I talk about often. Actually, I’ve never talked about it before.
No one has ever asked.
After a long moment and a few deep breaths, I nod. “She died of…me, I guess.”
Sam visibly flinches and I leap in to save him. “It was a long time ago.”
“My mom told me something vague about complications with childbirth, and I always just imagined a wound that never healed.”
“I suppose that’s correct.”
Sam shifts closer and pulls me into his body, curling around me until I’m wrapped in his warmth. “I always knew that your house wasn’t a safe place for anyone to talk about their feelings.”
“What did Dom say about it?” I ask, suddenly curious. In addition to my father never mentioning my mother’s name after her death, my brother also seemed to just forget about her.
Sam is quiet for a moment, considering. “It wasn’t exactly something he brought up often. But before you were born, when your mom was pregnant with you, he talked about you a lot. He was really excited to have a little sister.”
“Until that sister stole his mother away.” I don’t mean to sound so bitter. None of this is Sam’s fault, and it really was a long time ago. I’m over it.
I feel Sam shake his head against my body. “It wasn’t like that. It was almost like he was scared of you. Or scared you would get hurt. He never wanted you to come with us because what we were doing was too dangerous, even if it was something simple like riding our bikes to town. He would yell at you to go back home, and when one of the other guys would ask him why he was so mean, he would just say that you were too little to come. What if you got hurt, he would ask?”
“Protective since day one, I guess.” I huff. “I guess that explains our current predicament.”
“We protect the things we love the most, Naomi. Not the things we don’t care about.”
Sam’s words hold so much truth, I can’t bear to have them land on me. I’m not ready to forgive. I’m not ready to admit that the two men who caused me the most pain in life were just in pain themselves. Instead, I just snuggle deeper into Sam’s arms and close my eyes.
I have no idea when he gets up and stops the recording, but when I wake the next morning, my phone is plugged in beside the bed.