Chapter 13 – You Had No Control Over Your Brain
Monday
“It’s normal to have sex dreams,” Sophie said. “You were just all turned on from what you’d done with Jacob earlier.”
“But I was having illicit thoughts about his friends,” I groaned.
“It kinda makes me want to go skiing.”
“What?”
She crouched down a bit and put both her hands out like she was grabbing onto ski poles... I sighed. Nope. I got it. She was pretending she was holding on to penises.
“Wait, were they lying down?” Sophie asked. “Or standing?” She adjusted her hands. “Classically they’re lying down I think.”
I ignored her. “Soph, this isn’t a weird funny skiing situation.”
“Isn’t it though?”
I slapped her arm so she’d stand up straight. “No. And I still didn’t tell Jacob about Axel spending the night.”
Sophie blew out an exasperated breath. “Girl, it’s fine. Jacob doesn’t need to know about that. It’s over.”
“Well, the thing with Leo happened before Jacob and I were official. And he was pretty pissed about that.”
“That was way worse. Axel was just sleeping next to you. Nothing happened. At least, nothing like in your dream,” she said with a smile.
I groaned again and let my forehead fall against my locker with a satisfying bang.
Sophie laughed. “It’s fine. I have sex dreams about Mr. Halifax like every night.”
“Not helping.”
“I’m totally helping. Plus, you were high. It hardly counts. You had no control over your brain.”
Huh. I slowly lifted my head. “Is that true?” I asked.
“I think so.”
I nodded. “That sounds right. I mean, I was going to let Leo cum in my hair and I don’t even know if I’m into that.”
She laughed. “Well, Single Girl Rule #27: If he makes you come, he can cum anywhere he wants. And he definitely made you come at homecoming.”
I sighed. “Is there a rule #47?”
“No, why?”
I shrugged. “I may have made one up the other day and I kind of liked it. Single Girl Rule #47: Always give your boyfriend a blowjob when he’s upset with you.”
Sophie laughed. “I’m obsessed. But why would there be a rule that mentions boyfriends in rules for single girls? But I guess technically it seems like Russians think you’re single until you say ‘I do.’ Either way, you can’t just go adding random rules.”
“All the rules seem super random,” I said.
“Still. They’re set in stone.”
“If you say so.”
She smiled. “I do.” She laughed again. “I can’t believe you skipped hanging out at my place for the Giants’ game yesterday because of this.”
“You’re acting like it’s not a big deal. But it’s a huge deal!”
“It’s not. And speaking of your fantasies, on a scale of one to ten, how excited are you to see Axel after imagining blowing him?”
“Zero.”
“Then don’t look behind you.”
Oh no.
I felt Axel put his arm around me.
He pulled me into a hug. “Hey,” he said as he tucked my head under his chin. He ran his hand up and down my back. “How are you holding up?”
What exactly was he talking about here? He couldn’t know about my dream. I’d only told Sophie. And that was only like five minutes ago. “I’m...great.”
“Yeah?” He pulled back to look at me.
And I looked up at him. My dream had seemed so real. Just thinking about it made me feel all sweaty.
“Your face is a little red, but you have nothing to be embarrassed about. Don’t worry about what people are saying.”
“What are you talking about?” I asked. “Why would I be embarrassed? What are people saying?”
“I’m saying you shouldn’t be embarrassed. I honestly don’t know why anyone is embarrassed after a breakup. People gossip about everything, just ignore them.”
That was easy for him to say. He was always the one breaking up with people. But how did this have anything to do with me?
“I’m so confused,” Sophie said. “Are you saying that you broke up with Gigi? Because that would make my day.”
“No, I’m talking about Scarlett and Jacob,” Axel said.
“We didn’t break up,” I said.
Axel lowered his eyebrows. “What are you talking about?”
“What am I talking about? What are you talking about? Who told you that Jacob and I broke up?”
“Everyone basically saw it happen on Saturday,” Axel said.
“We had an argument, but...”
“And then you guys left all angry at each other. I just assumed...”
“We talked it out.”
He just stared at me. “Really? You talked out cheating on him?”
“I didn’t cheat on him!”
Axel laughed. “You went on a date with your...what did you call it? Your kiss thief?”
Sophie gasped.
I’d totally forgotten that I’d told Axel about my kiss thief. If my face wasn’t actually red before, I knew it was now.
“And then made out with him in front of Jacob at the party,” Axel said. “Do you not remember that? How high were you?”
“I didn’t make out with Leo. He kissed me. It was all a big misunderstanding.”
Axel just shook his head. “You’re seriously still together?”
“Yes!”
“Does Jacob know that?”
God, I hope so... I heard the click of Gigi’s heels on the floor before she appeared right in front of me. And I’d thought my morning couldn’t get any worse.
She pecked Axel’s cheek and turned to me. “Sorry about the breakup,” she said. “Although I heard that Olivia is quite excited.”
That was a low blow. “Jacob doesn’t like Olivia. And he’s still my boyfriend.”
Gigi laughed. “If you say so.” She turned to Axel. “Shnookums, walk me to class?”
Axel shook his head. “Gigi, I’m in the middle of a conversation...”
“It’s bad enough we have to sit with them at lunch.” She stuck out her lower lip in a pout that looked creepily childish.
So gross.
“I have to go,” Axel said. “But this conversation isn’t over.”
Wasn’t it though?
“Sorry that you’ll be single for the Sadie Hawkins dance for the millionth year in a row.” Gigi blew me a kiss before pulling Axel away.
I watched Axel walk off with his arm around Gigi’s shoulders. Had she not heard me say that Jacob and I hadn’t broken up? She needed hearing aids.
I rolled my eyes when I turned around.
“You told him about your kiss thief?!” Sophie asked.
“I was high. I had no control over my brain.”
“You still had control of your brain!”
“What?! You just told me that I didn’t. That my dream wasn’t my fault...”
“Gah.” Sophie sighed. “You’re right. Fine. But I can’t believe you told him without consulting me.”
“Why does it matter? We already unmasked Leo.” Thinking about Leo in my dream had me feeling all sweaty again. “I feel guilty about my dream. Do I need to tell Jacob?”
“Tell me what?” Jacob asked and put his arms around me. Similarly to how Axel just had. But Axel was comforting me from an apparent breakup. Jacob was doing it out of affection.
“Apparently there is a rumor going around that the two of you broke up,” Sophie said.
I guess that meant she didn’t think I should tell Jacob about the dream. And now that he was right here, I really didn’t want to anyway. What did a dream when I was high matter? It meant nothing. And Jacob meant everything.
“Well, let’s silence that rumor then.” Jacob leaned down and kissed me.
I stood up on my tiptoes to deepen the kiss. What was I worried about a dumb dream for? I’d much rather fantasize about this nonstop.
My dad cleared his throat.
Darn it! He popped up as much as RJ. I pulled back.
“Go to class,” my dad said. “Doing this in the hallway is entirely inappropriate.”
If he thought an innocent kiss in the hall was bad, he would have really hated hearing about my dream. I almost laughed thinking about Sophie pretending to ski.
My dad nodded when Jacob dropped his hands from my waist. He turned and walked to his classroom.
“Catch you at lunch,” Jacob said. “Try not to flirt too hard with Mr. Halifax.”
I laughed. “I never did that! I only flirt with you.”
He looked both ways and then lifted me up and twirled me around in the middle of the hallway.
I laughed when he kept turning in a circle. “Stop it, you’re making me dizzy!”
“Only if you promise to never flirt with anyone else but me.”
I laughed. “I promise.”
He stopped spinning and slowly lowered my feet back on the ground. I tickled his side and he laughed.
“Oh. Before I forget,” I said. “Put the Sadie Hawkins dance into your calendar. I’m officially asking you.” It wasn’t until next month. But I wanted to shove it in Gigi’s face so badly.
“I would have been very upset if you’d asked someone else,” Jacob said. “For a reveal or something.”
I shoved his arm. “Stop it. I’ve been dreaming of asking you.”
“Is that why you were moaning in your sleep on Saturday night?”
Kill me.
“I’m just kidding.” He leaned in closer and whispered: “I know you were dreaming about me because you kept moaning my name.” He lightly slapped my butt and walked to class.
Oh God. I was lucky I’d moaned his name and not Axel’s or Leo’s.
“You guys are almost too adorable,” Sophie said. “And see? Why would you go and ruin a perfectly good morning by telling him about weird fantasies and bedmates that don’t matter?”
I groaned. “Why do I keep forgetting to tell him about Axel?”
“Because it didn’t mean anything.”
That was the whole problem though. It had meant something while it was happening. It had meant a lot to me. And I was pretty sure that made it significantly worse than just an innocent bedmate.
“Do you really think it was a good idea to ask Jacob to the Sadie Hawkins dance though?” Sophie asked.
“Why wouldn’t it be?”
She shrugged. “It’s a month away. That feels like a jinx.”
“People make plans a month out all the time. I’m pretty sure my parents plan date nights that far in advance.”
Sophie laughed. “Fair. But I don’t think your couple goals should be like your mom’s. Or else you’ll end up sleeping with Mr. Halifax for sure.”
“Stop it.”
She smiled. “Speaking of our hot teacher...” She turned around and started walking backward. “Shall we?”
I no longer thought Mr. Halifax had a crush on me. But I still felt so awkward around him. I really needed to ask him about that A he’d given me on my quiz. I knew I didn’t deserve it. And I didn’t want weird special treatment.
I kept my head down as I walked into class.
Sophie sighed as we both sat down. “I really love his ass in khakis. It’s better than the feathers of his mascot costume.” She made a face. “Confession. I’ve been having weird dreams too recently.”
I laughed.
“Do you think I should ask Eli to be my boyfriend?”
“Where the heck did that come from?”
“I don’t know,” Sophie said. “Nothing I do is working with Mr. Halifax. The note I left him would have been so easy to respond to. I basically just said I was good at doing what I was told. He needs to tell me to do something now, right? The ball is in his court?”
Sophie didn’t usually ask me for advice like this. She was the one with all the experience. But I guess I did have a serious boyfriend now.
“What did his note say again?” I asked.
“That he’d confiscate my phone again if I used it in class.”
“Well...” I stared at Mr. Halifax writing an equation on the board and then back at her. “Maybe that was his move. Maybe he wants to keep confiscating your phone.”
“You’re a genius,” she said. “He can’t get enough of my pictures. Okay, good call.”
I couldn’t believe I was actually encouraging this... But we did know for a fact that he’d looked at the pictures on her phone. There was clearly something going on between them.
The bell rang and Sophie kept her phone out. She was pretending to text someone. Or maybe she was actually texting someone. I had no idea.
“Miss Hunter,” Mr. Halifax said. “What did I tell you about using your phone in my class?”
“Sorry, sir.” Sophie leaned forward a bit, revealing the top of her cleavage. “Am I going to be punished?”
“Yes. I mean...no. That’s it.” Mr. Halifax walked down our aisle. “Hand it over. You can pick it up after school again.” He held out his hand.
Sophie dropped it in his palm. “Darn it, I keep forgetting to set a password.”
Mr. Halifax ignored her comment. He pocketed the phone and walked back to the board.
“Do you think he has sex dreams about me too?” Sophie whispered.
Honestly? “Yeah, probably.”
I wasn’t sure I’d ever seen her so happy.
Mr. Halifax was just about to start class when the speakers turned on.
“We have a very special announcement this morning,” the principal said. “The results for student council have been totaled.”
I didn’t even know when the voting for that was.
“By an extremely wide margin, let’s congratulate our new school president, Scarlett Hunter!”
Um...what?
A few of the people in my class clapped for me. The principal kept announcing the other student council winners.
I leaned toward Sophie. “What the heck? I didn’t run for president!”
She just shrugged. She looked totally confused by the news too.
“Congratulations, Miss Hunter,” Mr. Halifax said with a smile.
Normally I’d be concerned about that smile. But I was finally starting to shake it off. “Um...thanks.”
“Everyone open up your books to page 83,” Mr. Halifax said and turned back to the board.
My phone buzzed. I pulled out my glasses to unlock it and then looked at my phone under my desk.
I had a message from RJ: “Ooooooh. That makes sense. LOL.”
“What the heck are you talking about?” I texted back.
“The student council ballot box must have been the one Liam and I stuffed. Instead of the one for the homecoming court. Sorry about that.”
I sighed. I remembered Liam and RJ said they were high or drunk or something when they’d stuffed the ballot box. Great. Now I’d accidentally cheated to become school president.
Another text came through: “But also...you’re welcome. Congrats on the presidency, baby doll.”
What the heck did a school president even do?