Chapter 39 – VALENTINA
Thirty-Nine
VALENTINA
Love.
I…love him?
I love him.
After a night of tossing and turning, hyperventilating into my pillow, and counting the tiny grooves on my ceiling like a lunatic, I came to one terrifying, exhilarating realization.
I’m in love with Maksim Belov.
I feel things for him I’ve never felt before. That I want everything with him I never thought I’d want. That I belong to him. Born to be his.
It’s crazy. I’m crazy…Maybe both.
But I don’t care. Keeping us a secret isn’t something I’m willing to do anymore. I’m too old for the sneaking around and pretending I don’t want to spend every waking second in his arms.
Fuck what everyone thinks because nothing else matters but us.
And that’s exactly why I’m here.
I slide my helmet off, tuck it under my arm, and take a steady breath as I stare at my childhood home. Memories of birthdays and holidays with Maksim flood back, and I can’t help but laugh. He used to think I was annoying, too loud, too wild. Now look at us.
I punch in the code, and the familiar scent of home greets me. Living on my own might be freedom, but this house will always be home.
“Already bleeding before you’ve even stepped on the mat?” I tease, leaning against the kitchen counter where my little brother is pricking his finger, checking his glucose before practice.
Like Mom, Madden was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes after fainting during his first-grade Christmas concert.
It was a terrifying thing to watch. But he was such a little trooper, and Mom guided him through it all.
Though the memory of finding her crying in the bathroom, blaming herself, still leaves an ache in my chest to this day.
Madden smirks without looking up. “Yeah. Pump’s off. I don’t need someone’s knee crushing it mid-roll.”
He’s focused, feeding the strip into the meter like it’s second nature, and I take a moment to admire my baby. So grown up now. He has Mom’s eyes but looks so much like Papi. Where AJ is chaos and impulse, Madden is calm, thoughtful, and a perfectionist in every way.
“120. Good enough.”
“You got a match today?”
“Nah, just training.”
I tear a banana from the bunch and toss it to him. “Did you remember to pack your kit? A snack? You’ll tank your blood sugar if you don’t eat something.”
He catches it one-handed and grins. “I could still take you down.”
“In your dreams, little man.” I tousle his hair, longer now, brushing past his ears because he insists on wearing it like Uncle Silas’s.
Madden puffs his chest and plants his feet in front of me. “I’ll be taller than you some day.”
His tone is light and teasing, but there’s something deeper in his eyes.
That same flash of awareness I see in Papi’s.
The one that stares back at me every time I look in the mirror.
It’s that unspoken knowledge of what’s out there, of what could come for us one day.
But that’s exactly why we train. Why we stay ready.
I hook an arm around his neck and kiss the top of his head like I always have. “Stay alert. And remember to put your pump back on.”
Like a typical teenager, he rolls his eyes, pretending to be disgusted by affection, even though he’s still holding onto me.
“Yeah, yeah. Okay, Mom. Or should I call you Hummingbird now?”
He snorts, breaking into a laugh, and I can’t help but join him. But his teasing reminds me of exactly why I came home today.
“Where’s Mom?”
“In the garden.” He grabs his bag and throws it over his shoulder. “Tell her I’m getting picked up in five.”
“Got it,” I say, watching him head for the door.
He turns at the last second, flashing me that handsome grin that is sure to break hearts one day—Maksim suddenly comes to mind—or mend them.
I blow him a kiss, and he rolls his eyes again but doesn’t hide his smile this time.
The screen door creaks as I step out onto the back patio, where sunlight breaks through the clouds in soft streaks.
The scent of basil and jasmine hangs in the air, and I smile, remembering the day she came home with potting soil and her first plant.
Two days after her retirement from the force.
Apparently, she needed a way to keep busy. As if wrangling twins wasn’t enough.
I spot her, in her element, crouched by the flowerbeds with her hair tied in a loose bun, and dirt smudged across her cheek. A pair of shears dangle from her fingers.
“Hey,” I call, resting against the doorframe.
She glances up and stands, brushing the soil from her knees, her eyes lighting with that warm smile I love so much.
“Vali! I wasn’t expecting you today.”
Her arms are around me in the next second.
“Didn’t want to miss you before you disappeared into your little jungle,” I tease, giving her a squeeze in return, and lingering a little longer than normal.
“You okay?”
That’s the thing about Mom, she asks so simply, but somehow it feels like she’s already read the answer before I can speak it. Already knows when there’s something I need to get off my chest.
I open my mouth, close it, and settle for a shaky breath. “Yeah. I think…I am.”
She studies me quietly and tilts her head. “You have that look. The one your father gets when he’s trying to avoid something.”
I laugh under my breath. “You mean the I’m totally fine but actually want to stab someone look?”
“That’s the one.”
I pick a leaf off a nearby bush, roll it between my fingers, and exhale. “Well…I think—No, I know I’m in love.”
Her hands are still, but she’s not surprised or shocked, just a soft nod, as if she’s been waiting for me to say it. “With Maksim.”
It’s not a question.
“Yeah.”
She hums, thoughtful. “I wondered when you’d tell me.”
I sink into the old iron chair beside the garden table and laugh. “Is it that obvious?”
“To me, always. I know you, Vali.” She sits across from me.
“You’ve loved that boy in one way or another since you were little.
Even when you didn’t know what it meant.
Wherever Maksim went, there you were, like his little shadow.
” She chuckles, her eyes distant with the memory.
“He hated it most days. But you grew on him eventually. Like a little sister.”
I grimace. The words Maksim and little sister together in a sentence make me cringe.
“You know what I mean,” she says, waving me off.
If anyone knows exactly how I’m feeling, it’s her.
Mom was a cop who fell in love with a man she should’ve cuffed and locked away for life.
But her heart had other plans. And I’m grateful for that.
For her bravery, for the choices she made, the love she and Papi built.
A love as strong today, if not stronger, than it was before I was born.
But just as Mom understands that the heart wants what it wants, he should be even more sympathetic toward Maksim…for more reasons than one.
“He’ll never accept him,” I whisper.
Mom sighs, wiping her hands on a towel. “Your father’s heart is protective when it comes to you, baby, not cruel. He sees Maksim’s ghosts, sees himself. As parents, we always want our kids to do better than we did.”
“Maksim is everything, Mom.”
Why am I crying?
She reaches across the table and takes my hand. “Then he’s worth fighting for.”
Those words hit me deep, the truth in them igniting an ache in my throat.
“I know this won’t be easy,” I admit, voice shaky. “But it feels…right. Like it’s always been supposed to happen. I’m just afraid of the fallout with Aunt Leni.”
“Aunt Leni loves you like you’re her own. And there’s no one good enough for her son, except you, in her eyes. I promise.”
The warmth of her hand anchors me. And for the first time since last night, the chaos in my chest settles. I don’t know what’s coming next, what the world will throw our way, but I know what I feel. And that’s enough. It has to be.
Mom’s phone buzzes in her pocket. She opens the text message, and her eyes widen.
“Shit. I completely forgot AJ was staying after school today.” She rises and starts for the house. “Stay here. I’ll be back.”
I follow. “I can pick her up for you.”
“Are you sure? I saw you roll in on your bike.”
Of course she did.
“There’s an extra helmet in the garage. She’ll be fine.”
She nods and cups my face, placing a kiss on my forehead. “Don’t worry yourself too much, baby. It’ll all work out in the end. It always does.”