14. Rowan
14
ROWAN
“R owan? I have Lex Landry’s office for you.”
My head snapped up at Noelle’s announcement through my desk phone’s speaker. All I wanted was a quiet Friday after a hellaciously busy week and a night of broken sleep after the fight with Rhiannon and a text to Spencer which I knew must have hurt him. If only I didn’t care so much whether I hurt him.
Now, I had an unexpected call from a studio boss. Why would he call directly? It didn’t matter that I tried to tell myself there was nothing wrong. My stomach churned in the second it took to lift the phone receiver and tap the blinking button to the extension where Lex waited. “Mr. Landry. What can I do for you?”
“So that’s what it takes to get your attention?” Spencer’s voice held a sharp, bitter sort of humor. “I have to pretend to be somebody you feel like talking to?”
Son of a bitch. After his several attempts to reach out yesterday afternoon, I blocked him for the rest of the day. Clearly, we had different ideas about what it meant when a person requested space. It was never my intention to block him permanently. At least, not until now. “Not cool. You’re wasting my time now. I wasn’t kidding when I said I need space.”
“Listen to me. This isn’t about that.” After that came a shout. “Stupid fuck! Get off the road!”
“Excuse me?”
“I’m in the car,” he grunted out. “Traffic out of Malibu is a fucking nightmare. Something very big has come up. Very important. I need you to follow directions and not ask any questions. I’ll answer them later.”
“Uh , sure. ” I had to laugh off my discomfort. Noelle and I would need to have a talk about properly vetting my phone calls. “I’ll get right on that for you.”
“Rowan,” he barked loudly enough to make my head snap back. “This is serious. I need you to get Hannah out of school and take her to the Beverly Wilshire. I’m probably being overcautious, but I don’t want to take unnecessary risks.”
Dread slithered up my spine, but I tried to ignore it. “You want me to do what? Why? You’re out of your mind.”
“ Please, Rowan. Listen to me. I know it’s a lot to ask but there’s a good reason for it. I’ll explain when I get there.” A car horn blared in the background.
“You can’t call me and order me around like this. As if I can drop everything at a moment’s notice, all because you said so.” Was this his way of forcing us into the same room? Ignoring my needs? Rhiannon was right. I shouldn’t have brought him into our lives.
“Please, get mad at me later. Right now, I need you to get Hannah and get to the damn hotel. Don’t tell anybody where you’re going, and don’t stop at home for anything. We’ll figure that out.”
The dread was starting to spread, lighting up the darkest corners of my brain. This wasn’t a joke. No way he’d keep up the act for this long.
“I made the reservation in Lex’s name,” he continued. “There’s a standing order to keep a suite free for any big shots he wants to impress. I let the staff know you’re on your way. Use Lex’s name, not your own. Do you understand? That is critical.”
Suddenly, I was very scared. “I don’t understand any of this,” I whispered over the fear rising in my chest.
“I know. I’ll explain when I get there. Do as I say… please. ”
“All right.” He had me freaked out, to say the least. Were we in danger? How could we be? How long were we supposed to stay at the hotel? He had a hell of a lot of explaining to do.
In the meantime, I had to explain this to my daughter when I didn’t have the first idea what was going on. It was a good thing in retrospect that I’d been so busy earlier in the week, meaning fewer meetings scheduled for today.
After doing a little last-minute rescheduling with Noelle, I headed out under the pretext of an emergency, which might not have been a lie.
* * *
“Why are we doing this?” Hannah’s wide eyes sparkled with mischief as we walked to the car after I pulled her out of school for the day. It wasn’t something I’d ever done, meaning this was a big adventure for her. “Where are we going?”
Only a mother would understand what it meant to pretend everything was fine when inside, the opposite was true. “We’re going to have a special weekend. It’s going to be a big adventure. Spencer got us a penthouse suite at the Beverly Wilshire as a surprise, and I thought it would be fun to get there early.” What a lame excuse.
Good thing she was a very excited ten-year-old who wasn’t currently in the mood to think logically. “Really? Cool!”
“So you’re excited?”
“Mom!” I remembered being her age, unable to believe my parents didn’t get it. “Do you know how many famous people stay there all the time? There’s always pictures of people walking in and out of there. Maybe we’ll see somebody!”
“Wouldn’t that be neat?” Because yes, let her be excited. Let her focus on that and not on how strange all of this was. She could afford to be happy while I wrestled with a hundred questions, each worse than the last. What could possibly have happened?
The check-in process was seamless. Certain names earned respect in this town, and Lex’s was one of them. Hannah was too enamored of our surroundings to notice the name I gave, looking around the lobby like she was hoping to spot a celebrity. By the time we headed for the elevator, she was bouncing on the balls of her feet. “This is so cool. Everybody at school is going so jealous when I tell them.”
Instinctively, I knew this was a bad idea. “I don’t think you should do that,” I told her on our way up to the suite. When she shot me a confused look, I explained, “This is a secret adventure. What happens if they find out at school that I pulled you out to take you to a hotel to have fun? No, this is going to have to be our secret. But secrets can be fun, right?”
“Yeah. I guess so.” It seemed like I had popped her balloon.
Her disappointment didn’t last long. All it took was opening the door onto a spacious, gorgeous suite to leave her squealing. “There’s a piano! Right in the living room!” She ran to it, then turned to me. “Do you remember how to play?”
“I haven’t played in years,” I told her, and I was a little disappointed. It wasn’t like I had a lot of opportunities to practice as the years went on. Life had sort of gotten in the way.
There was so much more to admire—the spa-like bathroom and the king beds in both large, sunny bedrooms. “King-size! It’s huge!” I knew before my daughter finished kicking off her shoes what she was about to do.
“Please, be careful,” I begged, but there was laughter in my voice as she climbed onto the bed and started jumping. At least one of us was happy.
The lock on the door buzzed, signaling someone was using the keypad to enter. I left Hannah to her jumping and strode out to the living room, where Spencer just about launched himself through the door with his head on a swivel, looking for us.
When his gaze landed on me, it softened. “You’re safe. Thank God.” He reached for me, touching my cheekandtaking my hand in his. Dammit, why did he have to touch me that way? I needed space. I needed time. I needed to make sense of the past and decide how much of a place it deserved in the present.
All of that flew out the window the second his skin touched mine.
I held a finger to my lips, looking down the hall to where Hannah was still bouncing her heart out. “We’re having a big adventure,” I told him.
I motioned for him to follow me onto the terrace, where small sofas and chairs were clustered together so people could sit and admire the view of Rodeo Drive. It was stunning and would be even more so once night fell and everything lit up.
At the moment, I couldn’t have cared less. “What is going on?” I whispered, leaving the glass door open a crack so I would hear if Hannah called out.
He looked like a man who had been through the wringer. His hair was a mess, as if his fingers had raked through it endlessly. His eyes were bleary. There were sweat stains under his arms when he stretched, his hands around the railing, bending at the waist and staring at the tile under our feet. “This is all my fault. I didn’t tell you everything, and I lost sight of the big picture.”
I knew it. I knew there had to be a catch. When would I ever learn to listen to my instincts? No, I had to go and ignore them, making excuses, telling myself it was better for me to control the narrative and bring him into our lives.
Leopards didn’t change their spots. He was never going to be completely honest with me unless there was a catastrophe and someone forced his hand. It seemed like we had reached that stage.
“Are you going to tell me what it’s about?” I asked. “Do I get to know why it was so important I take my daughter out of school early today and check into this hotel under a different name?”
“Please.” He held up a hand, still not looking at me. “You have no idea what’s been going through my head the past two hours. I have to catch my breath and think.”
“You had better do it in a hurry, or else I’m taking her out of here?—”
His head snapped up, eyes blazing, jaw clenched. “No. Not until I know for sure it’s safe for you to do that.”
“Why would it not be safe? What have you gotten us into?”
First, he blew out a deep breath. “You remember when we first went out, and I told you there was somebody looking to undercut me and my business partner?”
“You mean when all you wanted was to make sure I wouldn’t spill my guts?” I rolled my eyes. “Yeah. I remember that.”
“That piece of shit has also committed arson against his opponents prior to this.”
The late morning sun was warm, but it did nothing for the sudden icy cold that washed over me. “He what?”
“Not that we’ve ever been able to confirm it was him,” he continued. “But it’s a pattern. Before dawn this morning, my headquarters were vandalized. My office was torn to pieces.”
How did that tie into anything? It sucked, certainly. “That’s awful. I’m sorry.”
He swallowed hard, going pale. “Whoever did it left behind a photo of the three of us. From the sound of it, the photo was taken while we were leaving dinner last week.”
Finally, we were at the heart of the matter. He had taken the long way around, but now we were seeing eye to eye.
And there was one second, no more than that, when I saw myself pitching him over the railing and letting him fall after putting my baby in harm’s way. Now I understood the urgency. The secrecy. The fact that we had to go straight to the hotel without even stopping off for clothes.
A shockwave rolled over me, making me grip the railing to hold myself upright. “What you’re telling me is…” I whispered, shaking. “Hannah and I could’ve been in danger because of you. And that if you had left us alone, we wouldn’t be in danger. Does that about sum it up?”
“He might have found you either way.” Just when I was about to scream, he added, “But yes, I sped up the process. I know that. I should have known he would get desperate once we squashed all the shit he dug up on Miles.” He raked a hand through his hair, groaning.
“You knew this man was dangerous, and you neglected to add that part when you told me about him?”
“I didn’t think?—”
“That’s right! You didn’t think! You pulled our daughter into this, and you didn’t fucking think about it! How could you be so oblivious?”
I wanted him to fight. To shout and defend himself. I wanted an excuse to tear into him. What he gave me was a resigned sigh and slumped shoulders. “You’re absolutely right. I lost sight of what mattered.”
“That’s a nice way of saying you dropped the fucking ball,” I muttered.
“You think this isn’t killing me? Do you think my stomach didn’t drop when I heard about that photo?”
“Poor you,” I retorted, shaking my head and looking him up and down. It was like I had never seen him before. Just when I thought I understood him. “It’s killing you? I have a child in there who depends on me, and you put her in danger. Sorry if I don’t pity you.”
He straightened slowly, his features twisting in disappointment when he looked down at me. “She’s my daughter too. You don’t think I’m afraid for her? You don’t think she was my first thought?”
My heart swelled despite me very much wanting it not to. I needed it to harden, not to melt over a few empty words. “How would I know?” I countered. “You can decide at any point that you would rather walk away.”
He threw his arms into the air, barking out a laugh. “What do I have to do to prove I’m not interested in walking away? I don’t do that unless I’m forced into it by asshole parents, or have you forgotten?”
When he reached for me, I backed away, refusing to be touched. No matter how much I wanted to be in his arms and rest my aching head against his chest. This was all so much, and I needed something to cling to.
But this was also his fault. “What do we do?” I asked, wrapping my arms around my trembling body. “How am I supposed to give her a life if we have to worry about this guy following us, maybe hurting us?”
“I swear to you, I’m working on that. This is going to end soon.” He lowered his brow, nostrils flaring, teeth grinding. It was both chilling and strangely exciting. “He’s going to regret ever drawing his first breath by the time I’m finished with him. The point of getting you two here was making sure you’re safe while we figure out what comes next. I’m going to arrange for security in the meantime.”
His hands cupped my shoulders, and this time, I couldn’t fight him off. Not when I needed his nearness more than anything. Something real, solid, strong. For too long, I’d had to rely on myself and my family for Hannah’s needs. But what about me? For once, I just needed the physical support, the comfort for me. And here he was, offering me what I so desperately wanted. And as I let my body take what he was offering, my mind drifted back to how we got here, the frantic phone call. It was enough to know he was in this. That he cared.
I let him pull me in and wrap his arms around me tightly enough to squeeze the air from my lungs. His heart pounded wildly under my ear when I touched it to his firm chest. The throbbing in my head eased like magic. We would get through this. How did the impossible seem possible now that I was with him?
“I’ve got this. I’ve got you. ” His lips pressed against my forehead, then my temple, turning the iciness in my veins to something warmer and very familiar. Maybe it was so many days spent without his touch, his kiss. Maybe it was the heightened emotion and excitement of the day.
Whatever it was, it convinced me to tilt my head back and be kissed by him. To let him sweep me away with his lips, with his soft, urgent breaths. With his tongue, once it stroked mine, delving into my mouth, claiming it the way he had so many times before. I would never get tired of it.
What was happening to me? This was the man I should’ve resented to my last breath. Instead, I was clinging to him, kissing him hard, searching for some connection in the middle of so much confusion. He buried a hand in my hair, his touch tender and passionate. My pussy warmed and went moist as deep desire flared to life. Pleasure replaced fear, promising escape. Oblivion. I craved it with all of me.
There was one problem.
“I’m walking into the living room now!” Hannah’s voice rang out, echoing in the suite thanks to the way she raised it. “So if any grown-ups are kissing, they should stop!”
She must have already come out and spotted us. We laughed together before I ran my hands over my hair, putting it back into place. “Good thing nobody’s doing that!” I called out, extricating myself from Spencer’s embrace and opening the door further. It was time to put on a happy face again. “I have an idea. Let’s order room service. I skipped breakfast, and I’m starved.”
Hannah and Spencer exchanged a glance that contained a thousand words. “Do they have ice cream on the menu?” she asked.
For once, I wouldn’t put up an argument. Not this weekend.