30. Forget-Me-Not
Forget-Me-Not
T he inside of Talli’s house was all eclectic vintage decor with modern finishes. The kitchen, the first room we entered from the backyard, had butcher block countertops, light gray cabinets, and chef appliances like the oven and stove with too dangerous an amount of nozzles for someone like me who could barely make pancakes from the box correctly. It was homey like someone’s grandma’s house, but like the cool grandma who knows how to text without help.
After brief introductions to Simone and Maisie, all five of us headed inside. Seeing the manga series that Leah had been reading, I complimented it, starting a whole discussion of our favorite manga to read and anime to watch. Betty clung to Maisie and Simone, asking them both a ton of questions. I had to swallow a laugh when I saw her eyes almost fall from her head when Simone said she was a mermaid princess. For Maisie, her questions were all about witch-fae and her magic, as if her mom couldn’t answer the questions herself, which made Talli snort.
Inside, Talli directed us to take a seat at the breakfast nook. She used her coral magic to serve tea in an ornate teapot with mismatched tea cups and coffee cake on equally mismatched saucers. Even though I had watched her take the cake from the oven and slice it, the cake was already cool enough to eat. Oh, and it was so good .
“My oh my, Byrdie-Bee! I can’t believe how long it’s been!” Talli sat down in the breakfast nook across from me. “How were you even able to find me?”
“Maisie here was able to locate you using the grimoire.”
“Ah!” Talli looked from me to Maisie with the same warm smile and twinkle of pride in her eyes. “I knew as soon as you arrived that you were a fitch. And quite a powerful one at that! Using a locator spell on me without me noticing is no easy feat. I’m impressed?—”
“Holy crap, can you teach me how to do that?” Leah turned to ask Maisie. “It’s like Momma has eyes everywhere sometimes.”
“I don’t have to have any of that. I just know my kids because I was a teenager once, too.” Talli snorted. Leah rolled her eyes.
“Have you been so close to Blackbell the whole time since Pops and Max’s services?” I asked.
“More or less.” Talli shrugged one shoulder, reminding me of Quinn. She was super busy with work, so we hadn’t been able to talk a lot today.
Before I could really think of how much I missed my girlfriend, Talli continued talking about her life in a quick brief. She had settled down to be devoted to her own family. She didn’t travel as much for her work outside of going into Blackbell or nearby cities for those she knew who absolutely needed her help. While her husband was a fire elemental and traveled the country as a First Responder for months at a time, Talli homeschooled her girls, teaching them the basics as well as how to control their magic. Her life had both slowed down and maintained the same speed while caring for her twelve-year-old and six-and-three-quarters-year-old. Her life did seem peaceful and calm now.
“So, how have you been? I want to hear everything!” She eagerly asked when she finished.
I smiled, launching into how me and Uncle Everett had moved to Blackbell and had a condo there in the Southern District. I talked about Everett: how he was doing, what he was up to now, what his boyfriend was like, and how fun it was to live with him. I talked about my life: what college was like for my bachelors and masters degrees, what work was like as the Archive Library Manager, my lack of a love life but my abundance in friends. The entire time, Talli’s eyes were a glow with interest in the conversation. It was lighthearted and shallow, like old friends reuniting. But the deeper, heavier questions lapped at our feet like a rising tide. I had no idea how to tip-toe into the waters of it all.
“Oh, Byrd!” Talli beamed. “That is all so wonderful and amazing. Your mom would be so proud of you. I just know she would have had that sparkle in her eyes.”
I looked down to the table as I felt warmth surface within me, the same feeling I always got at the mention of my mom and how she would feel about me now. Mom was taken from me so early. I’m so different from how I was when she was alive. Still, she built a foundation. I am who I am because of her. Every decision I’d made and who I was a person was because of her raising me. I’m doing everything she would want me to do. Be independent. Take care of myself. Most of all, be happy. I knew she would be proud of the success that I had gotten all on my own. But there was something about hearing others who knew her say it out loud. I smiled. “Thank you so much.”
“Oh, my gods, I guess I will just freaking do it!” Leah mumbled under her breath next to me, slamming her fork down. “How on earth do you two know each other? Like, who even are you, Byrd? Why didn’t Momma even know you when you first got here? Why hasn’t she ever talked about you? Like, what in the hell is going on?”
“Leah Marie Walsh, you have the tact of a bull in a china shop.” Talli shook her head.
“I’m sorry! I have so many questions!”
“Yes, but there are better ways to ask them.” Talli leveled her daughter with a look before softening it. “But I know you have questions and you are owed answers. Byrd is, too.”
Talli took a sip of her tea and put it down in its saucer. She started speaking to Leah. “So, I want to start by apologizing to you both and Betty as well. None of you deserved to be in this situation, even if it was done at the time to protect all of you—even before some of you existed. I know it doesn’t make sense now, but all anyone who made these choices for you was your safety and your ability to find happiness in that safety. We wanted you to be able to make the choice to know the truth once the worst was over.”
“What do you mean, Talli? What are you saying?” I asked.
“I suppose I’m getting ahead of myself, aren’t I? Okay, let’s start at the beginning.” Talli leaned back away from the table. She inhaled deeply before exhaling.
Talli maintained eye contact with her oldest daughter as she started. “I’m one of the rare witch-fae who have always known they were one and were raised in a happy home that supported my nature. I learned the basics quickly and moved on to other spells. I found my calling early, helping rare shifters who needed protection that only my magic could provide. I made a living off of it, but it had to be underground to work. Yet, word spread throughout the supernatural community. That’s how I met your mother, Byrdie, her hearing about my services and requesting I make the very necklace you are wearing now.”
“Wait, you made this?” I asked, reaching for the obsidian pendant resting on my sweater. “I always thought that it was a family heirloom or something.”
“Doe requested I make the necklace right before she moved to Blackbell after her mom had passed away. The very stone within it was made from her lava powers and imbued with my magic.”
“Do you remember why she wanted it? What the purpose of it was?”
Talli looked just past me, squinting as if she was trying to figure something out in her mind. When she wasn’t able to after a few moments, she shook her head. “I don’t remember it, I’m afraid. I believe it had something to do with what she was. Doe was a shifter. Even though I don’t remember what sort of shifter she was, I do remember that necklace serving as a door. It could contain, release, or even be a signal of something. What exactly, I cannot say.”
“So, you met her mom,” Leah said, chewing her cake. “Then what? How did you end up getting so close to her?”
“Oh, if you had met Doe, you would know.” Talli smiled nostalgically. I nodded in agreement. “Doe had this magnetic presence about her. You just wanted to be in her orbit to hear her next joke or see her next outfit or just be around her. She was just incredible. After I made her necklace, we stayed connected. I was a bridesmaid at her wedding, was there throughout her whole pregnancy with Byrd, and visited the family regularly as I traveled for work. She even asked me to be one of Byrd’s godparents, which I wholeheartedly accepted. My relationship with Doe’s husband, daughter, Max, and Everett all were formed because of her, but they were able to blossom because I enjoyed everyone’s company. Of all my customers, Doe and her family were my favorite. Going to visit them all wasn’t a job. It was just like going to check-in with family for me just to see how everyone’s doing. Those were some of the best times of my life.”
Talli shook her head. “Then Doe was murdered.”
“Murdered?!” Leah and Betty exclaimed at the same time.
“Yes, unfortunately. Nothing was ever the same after that. Byrd’s father, Forrest, never recovered after losing his wife. He just… he was never whole again afterward. He did his best to care for Byrd, but Max and Everett had to move in to help.”
I blinked back tears as the truth of Talli’s words and old memories I had forgotten hit me hard. After we lost Mom, Pops never went back to how he was before. He was so much quieter and reserved. He always had a lost look in his eyes. He seemed so hollow, an empty ghost just floating through life. My Mom had just been murdered, and now it was like I was watching Pops fade away. Pops forced a smile around me but he was adrift without Mom, and there was nothing he could do to hide it. I hated seeing him like that. It made me question which was worse: losing a parent suddenly or watching them be lost to you and there was nothing you could do about it.
Talli pressed on. “I visited more often to keep an eye on things, but… things were so different. It felt harder… empty and colorless. I think we learned to manage, to cope, and it seemed to work for a while. But then, Max and Forrest were murdered. I was close enough to know they needed my help, but I was too late to change how the night ended. That weighs on me every single day.
“After Max’s and Forrest’s funerals, I remember I was leaving the house, having finished packing it to send the items to Byrd and Everett. Suddenly, I realized I was not only being followed, but that I was surrounded by these heavily tinted SUVs full of passengers. A man in the vehicle closest to me rolled down his windows and spoke. I don’t remember what he said. What I do remember is that it was a threat, especially as he pointed a magicked gun at me to really cement his point. I had never felt so much fear in my life, and I haven’t since. He said that his group had used my magic to find the family, that I was the reason they were dead. He threatened that if I didn’t tell them where Byrd was and vow to stay away this time, I would end up the same way.”
“Whaaa-? Can someone trace your magic? Is that possible?” Betty asked around a mouth full of Simone’s cake that she had passed to the little girl.
“If they have a very, very powerful witch-fae, yes. But this witch-fae would have to be of equal or greater power to my own to locate me. And none of the guys in these vehicles were fitches. I would sense power like that, and they didn’t have it.”
“Do you know what they were?” I questioned.
Talli shook her head. “I knew they were similar to the ones that had attacked us before, and I knew what they weren’t—which is to say not human, fitch, vampire, or shifter.”
“What happened next?” Leah asked.
“Unsure what to do but certain this guy would act on his words, I cast a Forget-Me-Maybe spell.”
As my stomach sank learning that Talli had been in such danger because of me, Simone asked. “Uh, I’m sorry, don’t you mean Forget-Me-Not?”
“No, you’re thinking of the flower,” Maisie corrected. “There are many different Forget-Me spells. A Forget-Me-Forever will make someone forget about you no matter what. There’s no spell to break that. You would have to change someone’s entire essence to break it by turning them into a vampire, shifter, or by killing the caster. A Forget-Me-Never makes someone remember you and think about you always. It’s an obsession spell, kinda like a love potion. Depending on the intention, it can be broken. A Forget-Me-Maybe spell is the most complex of all those spells. It’s also one of the few spells a witch can cast on herself. There are multiple parts to it: what someone is forgetting, how long they will forget, the trigger to make them remember, a trade to ensure the spell isn’t broken accidentally, and consent from the main folks involved. So, say, you just broke up with someone. You cast a Forget-Me-Maybe spell for them and yourself to forget until they tell you that they are sorry for hurting you. You trick them into consenting—easier than you think. You trade part of your magic to ensure no one remembers your ex or reminds you of them. Then one day years later, someone bumps into you, making you fall. They apologize for hurting you. Guess who it is? Your ex and you remember everything all over again.
“A Forget-Me-Maybe is a very powerful kind of Forget-Me spell and highly technical. It can get unruly and too much to handle very quickly. That’s why they usually recommend witches not cast such a spell.”
“Well, witch-fae by nature are not recommended, darling. Stick with me long enough, and I will teach you plenty that I’m sure you were taught not to do as a witch but can do as a fitch.” Talli winked at Maisie, who smiled mischievously. “I can even teach you a hack to cast a Forget-Me-Maybe spell without it backfiring, even if it’s on yourself.”
“So, that’s how you didn’t remember Byrd when we first arrived? You cast that spell?”
Tall nodded to Maisie’s question. “Exactly. After I did the spell, we all forgot what we were doing there and went our separate ways, but I had this uneasy feeling about going straight home. I left for Morgaine then. I met my husband and the rest is history. My point is: Witchcraft is always about intention. Most spells require consent if you are casting them on someone other than yourself, but that can be skirted around if you have bad intentions or your intentions are to protect someone from harm. So, I made them forget about me, Byrd, and Everett. As an extra measure, I made myself forget about Byrd and vice versa. I tied the trigger to another Forget-Me-Maybe spell I had cast before, so they were linked together. You break one, you break them both?—”
“Wait, wait, wait, I’m so sorry, Talli, but I have so many questions,” I interrupted. My anxiety was rising by the second as more and more questions sprang into my mind. “Why were there people after you? Why were there people after me and the rest of the family? What did they want?”
Talli’s eyes looked off into the distance again for a moment. “I can’t say. Although I remember who you are and who your mother was, there are still gaps in my memory. It’s like I woke up from a lucid dream and I’m trying to remember all the details, but my mind is pulling them away from me the more and more I try.”
“How is that possible? I thought you said the spells are tied together?” I asked.
“They are. It’s how I was able to remember you after you said you were ready to know the truth. But there must be something still hindering the release of all the information. If I had to guess, it must be because you are mentally ready, but you may not be physically ready. Or there’s another element to the spell that I don’t even remember. Or it’s a combination of the two. We won’t know until it’s broken, which isn’t the best answer, I know. I’m so sorry.”
“Is there anything we can do? To figure out how to break the spell and remember?” As I fidgeted with my necklace, a loose skin tag caught on my sweater. I moved to pull at it under the table. Distant alarm bells went off in my head at how long the pull was and how many more strands I could feel appear in their wake. But I ignored them. My questions were more urgent than whatever my body was doing to act out right now.
Talli thought for a moment. “I don’t have any concrete answers. But I’m sure that whatever started this path toward the truth will be what brings you to its end. It’s vague, I know.”
“The grimoire got us here, and it’s really what started this. Maybe now that we have Talli up to speed, she can help us decipher more of it to get answers sooner?”
“Simone, you are a beautiful genius!” I declared before turning to Talli. “Would you mind?”
Talli’s smile was wide enough to make her eyes crinkle on the sides. “Why, of course not!”
“Can I help?” Leah quickly asked.
“Oh, me too! I want to help Miss Maisie and the princess!”
We all laughed at Betty’s eagerness. Talli kissed her head. “Yes, yes! I think working with a grimoire would be excellent lessons for both of you.”
“Of course you find a way to make something cool about schoolwork.” Leah rolled her eyes.
As Talli admonished Leah for her attitude and Betty jumped with excitement and talked about her love for learning magic, I couldn’t help but smile even as a rope tightened around my heart feeling like it was strangling it. I missed my mom. I wished she was here for me to ask these questions. What was she? Why were there people after her? Had she done something? Why were they after me? Were they the same ones that killed Mom? Were they different from the ones that also killed Pops and Max? Why threaten Talli and Everett? I picked more and more at the skin around my fingers as the questions swirled around in my head. But there was something that Talli said that I also couldn’t shrug off.
I know it doesn’t make sense now, but all anyone who made these choices for you was your safety and your ability to find happiness in that safety. We wanted you to be able to make the choice to know the truth once the worst was over.
I know Mom would do anything to make sure I grew up safe and sound. She had fought for that. I knew that Aunt Max and Pops had died for that. Uncle Everett was prepared to die for it, too. Everyone wanted me to be safe.
But at what cost?
Why couldn’t I get rid of the feeling that I had lost so much more than I really knew?