Chapter 36 Nelly #3
Wade immediately moved to clear fluid from the calf's nostrils and mouth. His movements were quick but gentle, wiping away the birth membrane with practiced efficiency. I sat back on my heels, feeling drained yet proud, my hands and arms stained with birth fluids. I couldn’t believe what I’d just done.
This couldn’t be me, the worthless ballerina, doing something so important.
Dolly was fine. And we’d saved her baby.
I turned, joy spreading my lips into a smile.
But my heart sunk and the smile died when I saw Wade's concerned expression.
“What is it?” The question felt hollow as I said it, my mind already fearing the worst.
"The calf's not as responsive as I'd like," he said, running his hands over the tiny body. "There's some swelling in the head and tongue. Probably from being stuck in the birth canal too long."
He checked various indicators, explaining each as he went. "I'm looking at the hair coat for meconium staining, checking if he can maintain sternal recumbency—that's the ability to lie upright on his chest—and assessing eye responsiveness."
The calf lay limp under his ministrations, occasionally twitching but not making the efforts to rise that Wade clearly hoped to see.
"There's a nursing bottle in there, Nelly," Wade nodded toward the bag which had, at some point, toppled over. "Can you grab it?"
I scrambled over, rifling through the bag again and wondering how the heck I’d missed the feeding bottle. It wasn’t filled with white milk though. The contents were bubbly, and a familiar shade of toxic green. I blinked in surprise, then looked more closely to confirm what I was seeing.
"Is this... Mountain Dew?" I asked, holding up the bottle with its unmistakable, carbonated, lime-hued contents.
Wade nodded, not looking up from the calf. "Caffeine perks up listless calves. It's vet-approved. Works better than a lot of the commercial products believe it or not."
I carried the bottle back, watching as Wade gently pried open the calf's mouth and inserted the nipple. The calf seemed reluctant at first, but after a few drops hit its tongue, it began to suckle weakly.
"That's it," Wade encouraged. "Good boy."
While Wade tended to the calf, Dolly began straining her neck, trying to reach her baby.
She was too far away, so she started struggling to move her bulk across the hay, unable to stand after the strenuous birth but nonetheless determined.
Boone helped her, gently lifting and adjusting the large animal until she was close enough to connect with her baby.
Dolly’s rough tongue began methodically cleaning the calf, licking away the stickiness with motherly persistence.
Boone, Wade, and I gradually backed away, giving mother and baby space.
Dolly's attention was entirely focused on her calf now, her earlier distress replaced by intense maternal focus.
The calf, energized by the caffeine, had begun making more purposeful movements; its head lifted occasionally as its mother's tongue stimulated its circulation.
" Let’s give them some bonding time. Vet should be here soon," Wade said softly.
We left the mother and son, ambling slowly across the grass. Just as we reached the edge of the paddock, a truck rumbled down the driveway. The sun had dipped lower, early evening replacing late afternoon. A station wagon bounced down the rutted path, horn honking briefly to announce its arrival.
"I’ll go meet Doc Simmons," Wade said, hopping the fence instead of taking the time to open the gate. After a few paces, he glanced back at me. God, his eyes glowed like emeralds right now with the way the sun splashed across his face.
“You did amazing, Nelly.” The smile that stretched his face was so damn bright. “I’ll be a while with the Doc. I’ll catch up with y’all after.” With that, he jogged away.
Boone and I watched as the vet climbed from his car and called out a greeting.
Wade shouted something back. I turned around to stare at the calving shelter, a sense of accomplishment coursing through every inch of my body.
Because of us—me and two of my amazing Alphas—Dolly and her calf were alive.
Was there anything else in the world that felt so affirming?
To save a living, breathing creature that way?
For the first time in my life, I set dance aside, and I realized that I could find a deep and lasting fulfillment in something totally different.
“You coming, Nelly?”
I blinked, turning back around in slow motion and finding Boone, glorious braid pulled over his shoulder, holding the gate open and waiting patiently.
Wordlessly, I nodded and began walking. When I passed next to Boone, a wave of juniper, campfire, and mint kissed my body and my inner Omega stretched and yawned inside of me.
I woke up for him, for my Alpha, perfuming the air and flushing with warmth.
I could tell he sensed the way I wanted him, the way my biological imperative told me to, ‘Touch him! Kiss him! Mark him!’
His hand tightened its grip on the top of the gate.
He inhaled deeply, eyes half closing.
But he didn’t comment. He didn’t push. He simply closed the gate behind us, and we walked in companionable silence. My mind kept replaying what I’d just done. My hands were still sticky from helping Dolly.
“I need to wash my hands,” I commented. Though as soon as I said it, I realized that my skin, coated with the afterbirth and beginning to dry into something crusty and unpleasant, wasn’t the most important thing.
“Stables,” Boone said simply, “Got a sink and soap in such in there.”
“Okay,” I agreed, “I’d like to see Ghost anyways.”
A few steps.
A light breeze.
Sunshine warming my back.
"That was..." I trailed off, searching for words that could encompass what I'd just experienced. "Incredible. Terrifying, but incredible."
Boone nodded, his profile strong against the darkening sky. "Birth always is.”
I’d helped bring new life into the world. God, I wished Grandpa was still alive. I wished Grandmother knew who I was. Maybe I would call her. Even if she didn’t remember who I was, maybe she’d still listen to me tell her about Dolly and her calf… and about Sagebrush and my Alphas.
"I've never felt anything like that before," I admitted. "It was like... like being part of something bigger than myself."
The walls around my heart crumbled a little more.
God, how quickly I was forgetting my anger.
How rapidly I was abandoning my plan to leave at the first opportunity.
How easily I was slipping into the rhythms of ranch life.
How naturally I was falling in love with these men.
I glanced at Boone, suddenly desperate to fill the silence, to distract myself from the war raging inside me. "I haven't thought about Eros in days," I blurted out, immediately regretting the admission.
Boone's stride didn't falter, but I caught the slight tensing of his jaw. "Is that a bad thing?"
The question hung between us, deceptively simple.
"I don't know," I said finally, my voice small. "Part of me is angry at myself. It’s been five days and I’m—” I cut myself off, kicking a stone in my path, wishing I could kick away my feelings as easily. “Have they really not emailed?” I changed the subject.
“They really haven’t.” He answered, voice firm and honest.
I sighed. “That makes me…”
“Makes you what, Nelly?” Boone said my voice like a prayer. Like he was crossing everything he could—fingers, toes, silken hair—that my next words would be what he’d been waiting to hear, whatever that might be.
My heart beat several times before I could answer.
Thump.
Thump.
Thump.
“Part of me wonders if no answer from Eros is the answer. If maybe…” I let that ‘maybe’ hang in the air, completing the thought only in my own mind.
If maybe I was meant to be here after all.
The thought terrified me. Not because I couldn't imagine staying, but because I could imagine it.
I could imagine it all too easily now. Could picture mornings in the kitchen with Cooper's pancakes, afternoons helping Wade with the animals, evenings reading with Levi.
I could see myself becoming part of this place, this pack, in ways that seemed impossible just days ago.
Give me the strength, I thought, to not kiss this man beside me. I really, really want to right now.
"What does it say about me," I blurted out, not really expecting an answer, "that I could so quickly forgive and forget?
That I could so easily start to feel at home here?
" I swallowed hard, unwilling to fight the fire blooming in my chest when I thought of these five men, this ranch, this unexpected life.
Was it just my Omega nature? Were these unstoppable feelings manufactured by biology or were they real?
Boone remained silent for several steps, his expression unreadable. Then, so quietly I almost missed it: “It says you’re strong, Nelly. And that you belong here. You’ve always belonged here, even when none of us knew it.”
His words made my throat tighten. In my head, I’d been calling myself horrible names. Weak. Worthless. A waste of oxygen. He saw it differently.
Desperate to change the subject before tears threatened, I said the first thing that came into my head. "That language you were speaking to Dolly was beautiful."
A small smile softened his carved features. “Arapaho. Not many know it these days.”
"Wade said you grew up on a reservation?" I prompted, genuinely curious.
Boone nodded, his pace slowing as we approached the stables. He reached out, pulling one of the doors to the side. “Wind River. I still have family there. Our Northern Arapaho tribe shares it with the Eastern Shoshone. It’s been that way for over a hundred and fifty years.”
"Do you miss it?" I asked as we pushed into the stables, Boone leading me to the very back, and a door I’d never explored for some reason. When he pushed it open, a half bathroom came into view.
As I walked inside to wash up, Boone finally responded.
Only, it wasn’t to answer my question but instead ask one of his own.
“Take a ride with me, Nelly? The sunset is beautiful by the big lake.” His voice was so soft, so suddenly unsure.
By his expression, I could tell that Boone expected me to refuse him.
And that was fair, given that each time one of the men brought up riding, I turned them down.
I knew going riding with him meant more attachment, more reasons to want to stay when I should be planning my exit strategy.
Yet, things were suddenly different.
The second Boone had asked me, every part of me had instantly wanted to say ‘yes’. I had to fight myself to hesitate, to not show eagerness.
“I’d love that,” I found myself saying.
And the smile he gave me…
So Dazzling and surprised…
Shot through my heart.