Chapter 44 Kane
KANE
Otto’s Salvage Yard.
I didn’t greet Otto as Lucy and I walked past him.
I’d texted I was coming; he’d sent a thumbs up per usual.
When we talked more than that, it was about a part I couldn’t dig out of his treasure trove of a junkyard myself.
Though, when I got a part the easy way, it ended up gathering dust in the garage.
The tall gate leading into the back salvage yard hung ajar so I could come and go freely. The old hinges protested loudly as I pushed the chain link entrance fully inward.
The scent of old, road-worn oil and rubber filled my lungs as I inhaled deeply.
Even when I felt like I was losing my mind, I could come here and feel better.
Better enough not to do something drastic.
Better enough not to let my darker thoughts come to life.
Lately, I’d been either here at Otto’s or under a car back home tinkering away—usually making the problem worse.
I couldn’t pinpoint why I felt so restless tonight or why I needed Lucy here with me, but whatever crawled up my ass had bloated my body with manic energy.
So, here I was—tiny Omega in tow—venturing into the twisted mess of rusted metal.
I hadn’t planned it; I’d just woken her up on a whim.
Maybe it was the pressure from Nitro and Asher’s relentless ribbing about how I wasn’t living up to my reputation…
no, our reputation. DemonX had a certain vibe, and mercy and avoidance didn’t make the cut.
“Stop being a pussy, Kane. Look at her. You could petrify her with your eyes closed.” Nitro punched my arm with one fist; the vodka held in his other hand sloshed over the rim.
“Don’t ask him to do the impossible.” Asher joined in, glancing up from where he was burning old mail in the fireplace.
“True—” Nitro took a large gulp of Vodka— “once a pussy, always a pussy.”
“Shut the fuck up,” I growled at them.
They kept going though, hurling insults in my direction, making sure I knew what a disappointment I was being.
I was supposed to help terrify Lucy. As a pack, we wanted her to leave.
Only… every time I got near the woman, the last thing on my mind was chasing her away.
I mentally shook myself. If I started thinking about her scent, her smile, her strength, then I’d turn around, swoop her up into my arms, and march back to the truck.
Lucy trudged behind me, the borrowed boots clomping and slipping with each step.
At one point I heard her grumble under her breath, cursing the footwear…
and probably me too. I glanced back at her after a particularly loud stomp followed by a scuffle and small gasp.
She was walking fine now, as fine as she could in my boots. Had she tripped?
Slowing my pace until I was almost walking side-by-side with her—which was a dangerous thing to do, because her scent was the best kind of drug—I kept an eye on her from my periphery.
She was casting furtive glances to the left and right, her gaze intermittently traveling up the looming stacks of mangled vehicles.
Her expression was strained, mouth set in a shallow frown, brows scrunched.
Her arms were crossed tightly, as if she could hug this whole situation away.
I didn’t like seeing her like that, it gnawed at my guts.
She was uncomfortable, and the blame could only rest on one person. Me.
“Kane,” she whispered, her voice timid. “This place gives me the creep.”
I turned my head, meeting her wide, green-gold eyes. Fuck, she looked almost lost. A babe in the damn woods, with only the big bad wolf for company. I should walk her back to the truck and take her home. But my brothers had gotten into my head, their jabs well and truly adhered to my gray matter.
“Show some backbone,” I blurted, voice pitched aggressively.
She flinched.
Guilt shot through my stomach, trying to force up my esophagus and make me give Lucy an apology. I swallowed down the words of weakness before they could escape.
With a grimace, I pushed on, leading us deeper into the wreckage.
I swung right, walked a few feet, then curved around about a three hundred tires Otto would eventually sell in bulk. A local landscaping company usually snatched them up, shredding the old tires into recycled mulch for playgrounds. After one last turn, the wreckage stack I wanted came into view.
Beside me, Lucy was now rubbing her upper arms roughly.
The night air had cooled significantly since I’d dragged Lucy out of the house.
She was probably freezing in the shorts and shirt.
My hands lifted, fingers capturing the front of my jacket.
Before I knew what I was doing, I had taken the leather coat off and wrapped it around Lucy’s shoulders.
It swallowed her small frame up, and the sight of her wearing my clothing almost made me come undone.
But it was her expression that really shattered me.
Eyes wide with surprise.
Mouth slightly open.
She was caught off guard, looking for the lie within the act of kindness.
Only there wasn’t one, not this time. My only consideration was, She’s cold. I can help her be less cold.
I strode away quickly, running away from the mistake I’d made and the mistakes I wanted to make.
When I stood beside the correct mound of salvage, I waited for her to catch up. When she did, I avoided her gaze, instead pointing to a narrow gap between two massive wrecks.
“Squeeze through there,” I instructed, not bothering to sugarcoat it.
She blinked at me, confusion wrinkling her delicate features. “Kane, I—”
I cut her off. “I need the steering wheel of a ‘72 Maserati Boomerang.”
“I don’t even know what that looks like,” she replied, her voice small.
“You don’t need to know,” I snapped, frustration bubbling. “Crawl through there, and you’ll find it.”
“But how am I supposed to remove—”
I cut her off again, mostly because she sounded so uneasy. If she kept talking, I wouldn’t go through with this.
“Go get what I want, Lucy.” My tone was sharp, bits of glass ready to embed inside anything they touched.
Lucy moved slowly to the entrance of the narrow passage. Her expression wavered between defiance, uncertainty, and abject horror. With one last pleading look, she glanced at me, searching for an out. I merely stared back, unwavering and unrelenting.
Finally, she gathered her courage, squeezing her body into the cramped alley between the mangled frames.
I couldn’t help but feel a thrill at the sight, even if a part of me twisted at the notion of putting her in danger.
How often had I wanted to share this with someone?
My brothers didn’t understand. But fixing cars and crawling through this junkyard meant to me what Nitro’s blades meant to him.
Lucy moved so slowly it was like watching paint dry. But she kept going. She didn’t complain or beg. She just kept going.
When she finally reached the Maserati, she was wedged so tightly it was a wonder she could still breathe.
A shout escaped her lips. “Kane! I can’t even open the door! How am I supposed to—”
“Use your fucking imagination!” I shot back, not letting her finish.
Lucy looked back at the car, her head just about the only thing she could freely move, and then back in my direction. The beam of her headlamp hurt my eyes, so I looked at the dark sky overhead for a heartbeat, trying to get rid of the small glowing auras.
When I’d blinked away the pale spots in my vision, I found Lucy slowly making her way out the claustrophobic tunnel.
I leaned against the mound, putting my full weight against the tower of scrap. My weight made the entire thing creak loudly.
“Stop!” This time, Lucy didn’t sound a bit timid. Her voice rose and fell, all manner of emotion shaking up the syllables.
Instead of relenting, I doubled down. I didn’t passively rest my body against the wreckage pile, I stood up, pressed my palms against the bent fender of an 80’s Lincoln and actively pushed.
Lucy’s terror reached a fever pitch as metallic creaks and deep groans from items long ago settled in place seemed to echo throughout the salvage yard.
“Kane!” She screamed desperately. “Kane, please! I’m going to get stuck.”
I don’t know what took over me. I could hear her panic. I felt it in my goddamn marrow. Yet, I pushed again. After this, Ash and Nitro will stop bitch’n. They’ll leave me the fuck alone.
By the time I realized I’d taken it too far, it was too late.
I angled my body, headlight ray tunneling into the dark space where Lucy was crammed.
She was holding her arms above her head, pushing against something trying to collapse inward.
My heart raced as I realized that the entire pile might come down soon…
on top of Lucy. I wanted to shut my brothers up.
I wanted to show that I wasn’t hiding in the garage and at Otto’s because I couldn’t handle a five-foot nothing Omega.
I wanted to toughen her up, not trap her.
My pulse was in my mouth.
Beating. Beating on my tongue.
Lucy’s terror came out in waves, carried on her heady Omega perfume.
I had to get her out!
Moving as fast as I could without further shifting the pile, I stuffed my much larger body into the narrowing gap. It was tight, and only two feet in I realized I couldn’t get closer. I was nearly wedged in place sideways.
“Lucy, take my hand!” I yelled, raising my right arm, fingers stretched towards her.
Fear was made of a hundred tentacles, and it was reaching into every part of me, using toothy suckers to gain purchase and rip… rip… fucking rip me apart.
“Lucy!” I shouted again. She was still reaching up, palms pushing against what I could see now was a chrome wheel still attached to a rusted axle. “Give me one hand, Lucy! Just one!”
She listened, reaching one small hand in my direction. We were separated by mere inches. I had to get to her.
I pushed further, ignoring the pain in my back and stomach as protruding scrap cut into me. I must have hit something sharp, because dampness bloomed to the right of my spine. Who cared if I got hurt. All that mattered was getting Lucy out.
I could hardly breathe, the air was like molasses, too thick to be swallowed down properly.
Finally, mercifully, my fingers grazed hers.
“Kane, I’m scared,” Lucy sobbed, tears streaming down her cheeks.
“Just look at me, Lucy. Don’t look at anything else.”
I gripped her hand and pulled us outward, inch by inch.
Slow and careful didn't matter anymore; the tower of twisted metal was coming down whether we tiptoed or sprinted.
We were plunged into darkness after only a few frantic steps, both our headlamps knocked away in the chaos.
The lamps could stay buried in that metal graveyard forever. Lucy couldn't.
The passage grew smaller by the second.
My chest was incredibly tight, and I didn’t think it would ever loosen again.
When we pushed out into the chilly night air, I didn’t stop pulling my Omega.
I moved us far away before I turned abruptly and yanked her into my chest. The groans and cries of the collapsing tower were deafening.
I seemed to last forever. When the cacophony finally died out, my mind seemed to turn up its volume and fill the void.
Lucy. Lucy. Shit, I could have lost you before I even found you.
Fuck. I can’t feel this way.
The others won’t understand.
The smell of her wrapped around me softened the choking terror still tenderizing my insides. Lucy was sunshine even at midnight. She was a wishing flower, holding hope in every white-topped stem. She was everything I didn’t know I needed, everything I shouldn’t want to keep.
This is why I stayed away.
This is why I kept to the garage and Otto’s.
Because from the moment she stepped out of that transport van, I knew it wouldn’t take much for me to fall in deep.
“I’m fucking sorry,” I growled lowly, angry with myself. She didn’t respond. Had she heard me?
DemonX had always been a lot of things—orphans, troublemakers, daredevils, Mavericks, nonconformist freaks, drunkards, and womanizers.
When had we decided that meant we also had to be cruel?
“I can’t believe you just did that,” Lucy finally murmured, face pressed against my chest. She squirmed, trying to pull away, but I only tightened my hold. I wasn’t letting her go, damn my brothers and their bullshit.
When I kept quiet, Lucy spoke again. “Kane, you can let me go. We’re okay now.”
“We’re not,” I admitted, voice thick.
Yes, we didn’t get crushed, but we weren’t okay. Everything had changed for me. There was no turning back.
“We really are safe, Kane,” she insisted. “And it’s hard to breathe like this.” Lucy managed to slip her hands between us, palms pushing into my abdomen.
It took a great deal of effort, but I dropped my arms. She took a half step back, looking up at me through pale lashes. When we locked gazes, I thought my body would collapse just like the junk pile.
“You saved me,” she spoke again, looking unsure.
“I saved you,” I agreed, turning my body to look over at the damage I’d caused.
The once neat stack of busted vehicles was now scattered in every direction.
One car stuck nose up out of the mess, windshield facing the starry sky.
I didn’t even know where Lucy had been standing, I only knew that she’d have died.
She’d have died… because of me.