Chapter 38 Tray
TRAY
SEVEN DAYS AFTER TESSA’S ARRIVAL...
I was halfway through the bag of sour watermelon gummies by the time Tessa came back with a ‘healthier’ study snack. She placed the sliced apples with peanut butter down on the coffee table before plopping back onto the sectional.
“Did you study up while I was gone?” She waggled her eyebrows at me.
“You were gone two seconds.” I’d made a flippant comment yesterday about quitting college.
I’d only enrolled as a mode of keeping myself busy so I wouldn’t focus too much on my deteriorating mental state.
Crazy what a guy’s unmated Alpha nature could make him do when it started rearing its ugly head.
“I was gone ten minutes at least,” she countered, pursing her lips and giving me a disappointed shake of her head now.
“Told you I wasn’t a star student. Guess you’re just going to have to tutor me a lot. All the time. My college success depends on you.”
She rolled her eyes.
"You're insufferable," she muttered, though I caught the smile tugging at the corner of her mouth. “Fine, we’ll got through the rest of the flash cards, but you have to write them next time. My hands are still killing me."
“Your handwriting is so much neater though. And I liked watching you write them.” I grinned appreciatively.
She’d made the flash cards on the floor of my room.
Textbook open in front of her, on her knees in little athletic shorts, legs crossed at the ankles as she supported her upper body with one arm while she neatly wrote the questions and answers on opposite sides of pastel index cards.
“Flattery will get you nowhere,” she said, before picking a card. “Okay, ready?”
“I was born ready,” I said, but pitching my tone in a way that implied the opposite. She rewarded me with a dramatic eye roll before moving forward. “Coulomb’s Law.”
I mimed deep concentration, reaching into the bag of candy and popping another watermelon gummy into my mouth. I tilted my head back and forth, looked at the ceiling, down at the carpet, and then finally pretended to have an ah-ha moment.
“Is this the one about gravitational pull?” I asked.
“Nope.”
“Darn,” I snapped my fingers and scrunched my lips, acting like I was disappointed in myself.
“Is this the guy with the three laws that describe the whole planets moving around the sun thing?” I hesitated between words as I asked the new question, scratching the back of my neck.
“Tray, focus,” she urged me.
“Okay, just give me a minute.” I closed my eyes. Of course, I wasn’t thinking about Coulomb’s Law. I’d memorized that the first time the professor had mentioned it in class. “Oh! Electrostatic force between charged objects!” I shouted it, pretending hard-won triumph.
“Good!” A wide smile brightened her face. God, the entire room felt warmer now. She made it that way. Sunnier. Happier. The way she made me feel was like… every attraction I’d experienced with every random person over the years, had been rolled into one person then multiplied by infinity.
Before I could register what she was doing, Tessa closed the gap between us, leaning in with a suddenness that made my breath stutter.
She pressed a quick, soft kiss against my cheek, just at the hinge of my jaw.
Her hair fell against my neck, the scent of mango shampoo and her own Omega perfume hitting me hard.
When she pulled away, my skin tingled where she’d gently kissed.
I felt the gravity of her being here in the mansion, the promise of our future as a pack, and something in my chest tried to turn inside out.
Damn, I never thought I’d want to belong exclusively to anyone.
But here she was, challenging my long-set game plan for life.
Oblivion Haze forever.
My pack, and best friends, always with me.
Dixon at my side with whatever was between us eternally simmering but never boiling over.
“See? You don’t even need me. You could ace this easily all by yourself.”
I pretended to scowl. “I absolutely do need you. I’m highly reward motivated. If a right answer gets a kiss, I’ll study nonstop.”
She scoffed, scooting closer so her thigh pressed against mine. “You’re incorrigible. Has anyone ever told you that?”
“Every single one of my high school teachers,” I said. “Most of them, less nicely. They couldn’t give me too much crap though. My grades were good.”
“How good?” She quirked an eyebrow, suspicious of me.
“Good enough.” I sidestepped. “We should keep going. The old brain’s not going to learn all this without practice.”
She hesitated, still studying me as if she could figure out the game I was playing if she just waited a heartbeat longer. Eventually, she gave up.
Tessa rolled her neck a little and then pulled a pillow under one arm so she could lean more comfortably. She looked so beautiful, dark hair framing her face, the curls especially glossy today. She’d done something to her eyebrows, and I even thought there might be a touch of blush on her cheeks.
“Can you tell me more about Coulomb’s Law?” She stared at me, those blue eyes of hers sparkling. My heart thudded. My mouth felt dry suddenly. I felt completely disarmed, and I forgot to keep up my ruse of being academically defunct.
“It’s got four basic principles,” I began rattling off, “Opposite charges attract, same charges repel. The action happens at the line between charges. The force size basically has to do with the inverse of the square distance. And its size is proportional to charge value.”
Her smile wavered, and I realized what I’d done.
“I don’t get it, Tray. You know this stuff. Why are you acting like you need help?” She pouted a little. Had I lied to her? Was me playing around like this tantamount to a lie?
I gave her a sheepish grin, caught red-handed. There was no point in maintaining the charade when she'd seen right through me.
"Maybe I just wanted an excuse to hang out with you," I admitted, grabbing another gummy and avoiding her eyes. "And maybe I like the sound of your voice when you’re asking me questions.”
She bit her lower lip, the cards held limply in her hands now. She’d only been here a week. Maybe I was coming on too strong.
"Tray..." Her voice was softer now, uncertain.
The playful energy that had filled the room moments before shifted into something more charged. Her delicious Omega scent took on a spiciness as she searched for what to say to me.
"Sorry," I said quickly, setting the candy bag aside. "I didn't mean to make things awkward. I know you’ve only been here a week. I know you need more time.”
"No, it's not that." She set the flashcards down on the coffee table, her movements careful and deliberate. "It's just all still so new. You guys are so great. You’re everything any sane girl could want. It’s like someone reached into my wildest teenage dreams and yanked it into reality.”
I watched her fidget with the hem of her shirt, and I had to clench my hands into fists to keep from reaching out to her.
The unmated Alpha in me was practically slamming its body at the cage holding it back.
I wanted her so badly. Every part of me wanted every part of her.
She just kept watching me with those impossibly clear and bright sapphire eyes.
“I’m so glad you’re in my reality now, Tessa." The words spilled from my mouth, no time to think them through.
She stayed quiet and I could hear my own heartbeat thundering in my ears. Finally, she had mercy on me. She reached over and wrapped her hand over mine. That wasn’t enough for me. I shifted my hand, moving slowly, and knitting my fingers with hers.
“I’m glad I’m here too, Tray,” she murmured quietly.
I never wanted to stop holding her hand, but Mac walked into the living room then, eyes taking in the scene. The flash cards. The sliced apples. Our position on the sofa.
“Is our resident boy genius showing you that eidetic memory of his?” He moved to the coffee table and snagged an apple.
“Those are my study snacks,” I said in annoyance. Though I’d messed up my act, I hadn’t expressly told Tessa I could pass a class with my eyes closed. Well, no. Not my eyes. Can’t really use a photographic memory without eyes. But, whatever.
“What do you mean boy genius?” Tessa’s voice was dubious. “Tray was really struggling there for a minute. I mean, before he magically knew an in-depth answer without even pausing to think.”
Mac laughed. “Straight A student. Probably would have been valedictorian if he’d given it a morsel more effort. He can pretty much memorize anything if he reads it once.”
“I spent an hour making these, Tray.” Tessa brandished the flash cards at me, then proceeded to toss them unceremoniously into the air. I tried to grab them as if it was a game of 52 card pick-up.
“Not my cards!” I protested.
"Your cards? I made them!" Tessa crossed her arms, trying to look stern but failing as her lips twitched upward.
"Fine, our cards," I conceded, scrambling to collect the scattered flash cards from the floor. "And I wasn't completely faking it. Physics isn't exactly my strongest subject."
Mac snorted. "Yeah, right. You got a 99 on that test you took two weeks ago and then complained about that one point for two days."
I shot him a murderous glare. Traitor.
"You have to admit, acting dumb was a brilliant strategy to spend time with you." I flashed her my most charming smile.
Mac shook his head, biting into another apple slice. "I'll leave you two to sort this out." He looked at Tessa, addressing her directly. “Tray’s Achilles’ heel is tear-jerker dramas. If you want payback, put on ‘Love Story’ or ‘Brian’s Song’. He’ll cry like a baby for hours.”
“You and I need to have a talk about pack brother loyalty, Mac.” I glared at him.
Mac just grinned at me before walking out.
“So, more studying?” I asked hopefully.
“No way,” she shook her head slowly, head tilted, and chin jutted out. “I’m going to find the saddest movie with the most horrible ending and make you watch it right now.”
"Wait, wait, wait," I said, grabbing her hand as she reached for the remote. "I'm very fragile emotionally. You could traumatize me."
"Oh, poor baby," she cooed mockingly, but her fingers stayed wrapped in mine. "The big bad Alpha can't handle fictional characters meeting tragic ends?"
"It's not my fault! I get invested!" I protested, inching closer to her on the couch. "Besides, wouldn't you rather do something more fun than watch me sob into a pillow?"
Tessa pretended to consider this, tapping her chin thoughtfully. "Hmm, tempting, but I think I deserve some payback for wasting an hour making flash cards you didn't need."
"They weren't a waste," I said, my voice dropping lower as I moved closer still. "I got to watch you make them, didn't I?"
She rolled her eyes, but the blush creeping up her neck told me she wasn't as unaffected as she wanted to appear. "You're impossible."
"Part of my charm."
"Is that what you call it?" she asked, but there was no bite to her words.
“Charm, mojo, charisma, sheer animal magnetism.”
She picked up the pillow and I braced for impact. She hit me square in the chest.
“You got me!” I pretended to die, flopping forward against her. She giggled, and tried to push me off.
"Get off me, you big oaf," she laughed, but her hands lingered on my shoulders instead of pushing me away with any real force.
I propped myself up on my elbows, hovering over her where she'd sunk back into the couch cushions. The playful atmosphere shifted again, the air between us crackling with tension. Her laughter faded as she looked up at me, those blue eyes darkening.
"Tessa," I breathed, my gaze dropping to her lips before snapping back up to meet her eyes.
"Yes?" she whispered, her hands still resting on my shoulders.
“Is this okay?” It wasn’t the question I wanted to ask. It wasn’t—Can I kiss you? Can I hold you? Can I have you forever?
She nodded slowly, her fingers tightening on my shoulders. The smell of her was making my head spin. I lowered myself carefully, giving her every chance to change her mind, to push me away.
She didn't.
When our lips met, it was gentle at first—tentative, exploring.
But then she sighed against my mouth, and something inside me snapped.
I deepened the kiss, one hand sliding into her hair, cradling the back of her head.
Her arms wrapped around my neck, pulling me closer, and I felt her heartbeat racing against my chest.
Time stopped existing. There was only Tessa—her soft lips, her warm breath, the little sounds she made when I changed the angle of the kiss.
I wanted to devour her, to mark her as mine, but I forced myself to go slow.
To savor. When my right hand began to move down her side and toward her hips, I felt her body stiffen and I smelled the way her scent began to shift.
From enjoyment to hesitation.
I was doing too much. Too fast. Too soon.
It took everything in me to pull away from her. Tessa’s cheeks were flushed, hair mussed where my fingers had tangled in it. She looked dazed, her lips pink and slightly swollen.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to kiss you like that. I only meant to…” I didn’t know what to say. I felt like I’d done something inexcusable. We’d all vowed to not rush her.
“It’s okay.” She lifted a hand to cup my face. “Can you move? We have a movie to watch.”
I was grateful when Josie padded into the living room, hopping up onto the coffee table to sniff the apples and peanut butter. It gave me and Tessa something else to focus on in the wake of the kiss.