Chapter 37
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Dahlia
“The one in which I love you.”
Dahlia had tried not to think of his declaration, but his words lingered in her mind. They were like a treasure she could unwrap and revel in when her memories grew too dark.
She could deny him nothing.
Lia went to him, standing between his parted legs. Even sitting down, he was still tall. He held out his hand. Lia stared at it for a beat before realizing what he wanted. She dangled the pendant in front of his face.
“Sit down.”
She spun around and slowly sat between his bent legs, her back ramrod straight. She stifled a squeak when he looped an arm around her waist and drew her against him, his thick thighs bracketing her round hips. His warmth immediately chased away some of the chill.
Goosebumps broke out across her arms when he pushed the braid away from her neck.
He lifted the necklace over her head, and the cool metal pendant settled beneath her collarbone.
Little shivers of pleasure skittered through her each time his fingers accidentally brushed her skin, securing the jewelry.
“Thank you,” she said in a hushed tone.
Every nerve in her body lit up when he brushed a kiss across the top of her spine, his lips lingering. It was a question. And Lia answered.
She tipped her head to the side, allowing him more access.
He didn’t devour as she thought he would.
Instead, he explored the contours of her shoulder, the slope of her neck, and even the hollow behind her ear.
A soft moan floated from her lips, and she leaned back into his embrace, eyes closing.
His hand slipped up her waist and cupped her breast before continuing its torturous ascent.
He caressed the pendant and then gently clasped her throat. She arched against him.
Dahlia blindly turned toward him, her lips seeking his own.
“Open your eyes, jaivelle.”
She scrunched them shut tighter. If she didn’t, reality would come crashing down and ruin the moment.
“Please.”
Helplessly, she followed his command. What she saw in his face was too much.
Desire.
Sadness.
Regret.
Hurt.
Need.
And something that looked a lot like love.
What could he see in her own gaze? She wanted to look away, to hide from him, but she was trapped in the moment.
“We are bound, little human.”
An ugly truth she wanted to deny but couldn’t.
“I know,” she admitted. Even though she’d run from what she’d done, run from him, Lia had carried Neve everywhere with her. She couldn’t escape him. At some point, the gruff, cold frost giant had become part of her.
He rumbled in satisfaction, but his expression was dark. “But we are far from okay.”
Her voice cracked. “I know.” They’d both made mistakes, but she’d been the one to attack first. “Why is this part so easy?” she whispered.
“Because your body already knows it belongs to me. We just need to convince your mind now.”
He brushed his thumb over her bottom lip. Things weren’t even close to being perfect, but maybe, just maybe, she could allow herself this. Lia kissed his thumb. His hips flexed, and her whole body shivered at his reaction.
His lips were so close but so far away. All she wanted was for him to devour her, to make everything disappear. But he didn’t move, just watched expressions play over her face, like he was trying to absorb every inch of her.
“Ask,” he said simply. Heat crept into her face. “I will not take from you. Not ever.”
Be brave.
The words wouldn’t come so instead, she twisted and crawled into his lap, his hands wrapping around her waist. She straddled his abs, which clenched deliciously beneath her.
Bracing herself against his chest, she leaned forward and kissed the space between his two hearts and whispered into his skin. “I’m sorry.”
Dahlia leaned back and swallowed hard. “I know it’s not enough to make up for what I’ve done, but I hold so much regret in my heart for my actions.” Please forgive me.
His left hand released her waist and slid into her hair, cradling the back of her skull. “I know.” He dropped a kiss on her forehead and then tipped her head back. “What do you want?”
Forgiveness.
Instead, she said, “A kiss.”
He slowly closed the distance between them and glided his lips across her own. It was fleeting and infinitely gentle.
It felt like forgiveness.
She tried to press harder, but he wouldn’t let her. Instead, he dropped kisses to her cheekbones, the slope of her nose, the stubborn point of her chin, and the corners of her eyes.
“Stop,” she rasped. It was too much. She didn’t deserve gentleness.
“No, you don’t get to leave me when things get uncomfortable.”
Her brows furrowed. “I’m right here.”
Neve shook his head. “I can feel you withdrawing. Hoisting your walls higher.”
“I have to.” If she didn’t, he would destroy her.
“No, you don’t. You just haven’t realized that yet.” He dropped one last sweet kiss on her lips. “Stop hiding from me and be brave. You never shied from me in the past.”
“You never had reason to kill me either.”
He blinked slowly, his jaw flexing. “You really think I would do that?” No, but it was what she deserved. “Answer me.”
“No.”
“Then why say such a thing?”
“Because I deserve it,” she whispered.
“No, jaivelle, you do not.” He glanced away, swallowing hard.
“For the longest time, I wanted to hurt you for what you had done. I knew you had not chosen the marriage, but I thought you’d grown to care for me as I’d grown to care for you.
” He half chuckled. “It wasn’t about the act.
Assassins try to kill me on a weekly basis. It was the fact that you left.”
Dahlia bit her bottom lip to keep from crying. His words were like a physical blow. “I’m sorry.”
“I know. I can smell it on you. And I also know that you are not a naturally violent person. You only strike when you or someone you love is in danger.” His gaze strayed to Cosmos and back to Lia. “They tied your hands by using your brother.” A statement. Not a question. “Tell me the truth.”
The time for lies was over. What did she have to lose?
He already figured out part of the truth.
“We’ve never been safe. Allium and Randa are negligent, selfish reprobates.
Allium delights in hurting Randa’s bastard born children.
Randa doesn’t care for them.” Adder was proof of that.
She battled back a shiver at memory of the Giver.
“As I said before, Cosmos and I didn’t have capable mothers, so I stepped in.
He became my whole family. The monarchs knew of my attachment and used it.
They beat him, imprisoned him, and planned on sending him to the Asterium fields. ”
Neve sucked in a sharp breath.
“I was given a choice. Comply or watch one of the only people I’ve ever loved die.
I couldn’t do it.” She shook her head as tears tracked down her cheeks.
“I managed to get him out and planned to run, but the Loriian delegation showed up early.” Lia shrugged.
“As luck would have it, that is when we first met.”
Neve’s lips parted. “That is why you were dressed as a maid.”
“It’s easier to wander the palace as a servant.”
He gave her a droll look. “As I well know. You drove my warriors mad. They were always searching for you.” He cocked his head. “Why didn’t you leave sooner? There were plenty of chances for you to run.”
“Because I received a sign that my brother never made it to safety. That my plan had failed. I had no choice but to move forward with their plan, even if part of myself died that day.”
He inhaled deeply, scenting for the truth. “So it was not because of anything I did?” he rasped.
Her eyes widened. He thought she chose that moment because she didn’t want him?
To fend off his affections? Dahlia caught his cheeks between her palms. “No,” she breathed.
“I have never been touched with that much love or reverence in the whole of my life. You didn’t pursue me that night. I pursued you.”
“Why then?” His voice cracked.
“Because I’m selfish. I had made so many sacrifices, and in that moment, I just wanted you for myself.
I felt safe, loved, and seen for the first time in so long.
You made me feel that way,” she whispered, looking away and dropping her hands to his chest. Her cheeks heated in shame and embarrassment at her admission. “I wanted you, but I had little time.”
He crooked his finger beneath her chin and lifted, his sharp gaze roving her face. “You could have come to me. You’d already spared Lumi. I would have understood your situation.”
She laughed softly and wiped the tears from her face with her forearm. “I couldn’t risk his life on a gamble that you might care enough for me not to kill me on the spot.” Lia exhaled. “And now look… my whole world is in this tent.” She swallowed hard. “In your hands after everything.”
“And there is no one else they hold over you?”
A lone tear dripped down her cheek. “Not anymore,” she admitted.
He inhaled and some of the tension drained from his shoulders. “Thank you for telling me the truth.” He wiped her tear away. “You are extraordinary. Did you know that my mate?”
Mate. Her wet lashes stuck together as she rubbed her eyes. “Flawed, more like it.”
“As we both are. Today, we move forward, no more secrets. No more games.”
She still had two secrets. Hidden truths that would ruin everything. “Are you saying you trust me?”
He arched a brow. “As much as you trust me, wife.”
Which was not much if the chains from the last several weeks were anything to go by.
Neve pulled Dahlia closer and held her. She wrapped her arms around him as much as she could, her fingertips flexing against his muscular back. Lia leaned her cheek against his chest; his chin pillowed on the top of her head.
It was perfect.
I love you.
Lia squeezed her eyes shut. Be brave.
“I love you,” she murmured.
Neve’s chest rumbled and he held her a little tighter. The Frost King pressed a kiss to the top of her head. “I know.”
But was it enough?
Dahlia didn’t know.