Chapter Six
A warm night breeze ruffled Clay’s hair as he sat at the edge of the pool, dangling his legs in the water.
Hawaii was so goddamn beautiful, and he let himself dream again that he could live here full time.
He might be trained every bit as well as any other Bosi guard, but Clay didn’t truly have a fighter’s soul.
Everything inside him craved quiet, peaceful beauty.
A life of violence had been given to him. Clay never would’ve chosen his path.
A shadow grew bigger on the water.
Clay smiled. Fabrice might be a calm, soothing person, but Clay always felt him when he was near. His presence was too familiar to Clay for him to hide.
Fabrice filled the space beside him and put his bare feet in the water. Hip to hip, they sat in silence. Clay didn’t know what Fabrice had going on, but he could be here.
“I forgot to ask what happened to that guy who brought Beau scrambling here.”
Clay leaned his shoulder against Fabrice, soaking up the only real connection he had in the world.
“In one of the world’s craziest ‘it’s a small world' stories, it turns out the guy had stopped once to help Kylo change a flat tire like three years ago. I guess he was probably in town, stalking the Agafonov brothers. It was just one of those random-ass things.” Clay shrugged.
“Or maybe he had been meant to meet Kylo and have his life spared now. You know how life can be funny like that. Beau took out his kneecaps and sent him home to Russia as a failure. From what Henry tells me, they’ll either kill him for failing his mission or they’ll dump him in some freezing back alley to die from his injuries and the elements.
Either way, Jay gets a horrible death, and Beau can still say he didn’t kill the guy. ”
Fabrice blew out a soft sigh. “Well, that’s a new leaf for Beau. You really should have seen him. We’ve seen him in some deeply dark places over the years, and this was still epic—like the kind of explosive rage he flew into when Boone tried to kill himself.”
Clay shook his head. He couldn’t believe that. Boone was Beau’s oldest son. When he had nearly succeeded at taking his own life several years ago, Beau had been inconsolable, and his temper had sent them all into hiding. Clay couldn’t see Beau being the same for him.
“Can’t picture it.”
A soft chuckle rumbled from Fabrice. He turned his head and kissed Clay’s forehead. “You’ve always been too blind to realize how much people care about you.”
Clay wanted to laugh off the words, but they cut too close to the bone. He had never been good at spotting love. The only person he knew who loved him for real was Fabrice.
Fabrice cleared his throat. “So, Scout, huh?”
Truthfully, Clay didn’t want to answer that.
He would end up looking like a fool all over again when Scout found his person.
Clay didn’t speak. He knew—in itself—silence was an answer.
But he couldn’t open his mouth and have happiness fall out when he knew Scout only wanted to be friends.
Scout had reiterated that point at breakfast.
Fabrice blew out a slow sigh. “I suppose I should’ve seen that one coming. When he kissed you at Affinity, I was standing there. But you hadn’t really said anything else about it, and I thought you had a crush on Zeus.”
Clay smiled. “You just made me sound like I’m twelve.”
Fabrice’s mouth lifted in one corner. The half-smile fell away as quickly as it appeared.
“I thought you wanted quiet freedom. You have a better shot at that with Zeus. With Scout, you’ll be trapped with the family forever.
Beau might actually let you move on to a happy life if you’re with someone powerful and connected to the family. Zeus could save you.”
Every word was like a punch to the chest. They knew each other too well.
Something about everything Fabrice said hurt his heart.
“I hear you, but you missed a key detail: Zeus doesn’t want me.
That guy doesn’t want anyone. Not really.
” Clay’s gaze moved to the gorgeous tropical trees and flowers surrounding the pool.
He felt like he was in a hidden paradise.
Clay needed a balm on his soul before he finished his thought. “No one really wants me.”
Silence met his claim.
Clay turned his head and found Fabrice staring at him with fire dancing in his eyes. “That’s not true, and you know it.”
Here they were again. Clay desperately wished he had never acted on a moment of weakness and kissed Fabrice, stepping over an invisible line two years ago.
Now all either of them did was act like nothing changed and do every act of friendship as over-the-top as possible.
It was as if they fought to convince each other of some lie.
This time, Clay couldn’t back away from this conversation. “You’re the one who said you didn’t want us. You’re the one who said everyone would flip out since we had been raised like brothers. Please don’t look at me like I’m killing you. I already had to mourn you.”
Fabrice looked away. “Never mind. Forget I said anything. You’re a grown man. Get your heart broken. Lose your chance to get away. What do I care?” Fabrice stood and headed for the house.
A growl of frustration rose in Clay’s throat. “Fabrice.” He couldn’t stop himself from calling out.
Fabrice turned. He looked closed—like he had withdrawn all care from Clay.
Clay’s shoulders sagged. All he ever did was somehow end up alone. “I heard what you said. You know I love you and value your opinion. I’ll keep every word you said in mind. You know I can’t take you being mad at me.”
Fabrice seemed to deflate. He dropped his defensive stance and moved back to Clay. Fabrice bent and kissed Clay’s forehead again. “I’m not mad at you, beautiful. I’m mad at myself. Just be happy, okay?”
Clay nodded. His throat tightened. He wanted to tell his best friend that he didn’t know how to find joy in anything.
But Clay had a bad feeling Fabrice wasn’t his best friend any longer and hadn’t been for a while.
Like everything else, that was on him. Clay might have no choice about living with Fabrice, but he could stop making things worse by showing up.
It was like ripping out his own heart, but Fabrice would be better off without him in his life.
Red and black makeup ran down the drain.
Thankfully, Scout had gotten good at washing off the clown face in record time.
Anytime he had to get too close to a target, Scout chose a clown persona.
Not only did the move hide his identity, but clowns made people uncomfortable.
Nothing could make people cross the street and not look directly at someone like an evil-looking harlequin.
It was harder for a witness to pick him out of a lineup if they refused to look at him.
While technically Scout hadn’t left the Bosi estate, he didn’t take chances.
If anyone saw him, he might draw too much attention to the property.
He would never jeopardize the family just to soothe his jealousy.
Unfortunately, eavesdropping only left him with more questions than answers.
He had heard every word said between Fabrice and Clay.
He wished he hadn’t caught the part about Scout keeping him tied to a family Clay seemingly wanted to leave behind.
Clay had never acted anything other than happy with the people in his life.
Now he knew Clay wanted something more than this life, and he couldn’t unlearn that.
With his face clean, Scout tossed his shirt and towel into the laundry chute before stepping out into his bedroom.
Clay sat on the edge of the bed, waiting.
Emotions overwhelmed him, the way they always did when he saw Clay.
His gorgeous hazel eyes always stole Scout’s breath.
His blond hair was a windblown mess. Scout would find a way to make sure Clay got the life he wanted, even if that meant Scout didn’t get to keep him.
“Hey. I didn’t think I’d see you for a while.”
Clay smirked. “I can’t tell if you’re a terrible liar or not. But I know you had to know I was on my way, since you sat in the bushes watching me all night.”
Damn. That looked bad. He climbed onto the bed and settled on his back.
Scout didn’t want to look Clay in the eye and lie again.
“I was worried about you. Fabrice is your best friend, but he’s in love with you.
I didn’t know what would happen tonight.
Jealousy is a hell of a motivator.” Okay, so maybe he didn’t intend to lie as boldly as he thought.
Clay’s shoulders expanded like he drew an overly deep breath. “You don’t want to hear anything about all that.” Clay never looked Scout’s way as he made the claim.
Scout brushed the tips of his fingers down the small of Clay’s back. “You can talk to me about it. I’m your friend too.”
Clay shot to his feet and tore off his shirt. “Yeah, I know. You’ve made it abundantly clear we’re friends. I get it.”