Chapter 3
Farrow
I don’t usually take human stuff, not even to fuck with them.
I have friends who like to souvenir, especially when the kid grows out of needing a bridge guardian.
Some like to move things around or leave messages on bathroom mirrors.
I didn’t intend on picking up the underwear, but when he left the room, my tail snagged them, and then I’d bounced to the closet in the kid’s room and slipped under her bed, cum-damp underwear stuffed in my pocket.
My mind was re-living every moment as I checked the last of my bridges.
When I returned to the port, I still needed to write my report for my boss before clocking off.
I stared at the screen, not sure what to write about that house, beyond the fact that the kid had moved and there was a dog called Bunny.
If I was sick or on leave, the monster covering me needed that info.
“Want to grab a drink after?” Crispin leaned his hip against my desk, a tablet in one hand.
“Sure.” I needed to tell someone about my night, and I wasn’t ready to make a call about the blue and gold dragon.
But I had mentioned that a young man also lived there.
If he hadn’t been naked, I wouldn’t have seen the ink.
I needed to research sorcerers, as most of what I knew was little more than tales designed to scare young monsters from crossing into the human world for a bit of fun.
It would be impossible to watch all the bridges I was assigned to all the time.
Truthfully, we were looking for early warning signs that a child might be getting curious about crossing into our world, or that a sorcerer was using them to access magic.
I shuddered.
Crispin’s long ears swiveled. “Are you all right?”
“Yeah, I had a run-in with a dog.” Note to self for future bridges: do not assume an animal based on its name.
Crispin’s eyes widened. “Santa, did it bite you?”
“Do I look like I’m leaking magic? I was too quick.” And had ended up getting a private show. Humans were a bit weird looking, no tail, no horns or claws, but watching someone be all caught up in desire…that was hot, regardless. “I’ll tell you the rest later. Give me a handful, and I’ll be done.”
I detailed the rest of the night’s activity, or lack thereof, and the reduced strength of one of the bridges due to the kid getting older. However, given that the mother was pregnant and there were two younger siblings, I’d be checking that house for a while.
I submitted my report, changed out of my uniform and shoved it in my bag, then scanned out of the port and met up with Crispin outside.
I drew in a breath and lifted my gaze to the lilac sky.
The stars weren’t out yet, though the sun had dipped behind the trees.
“What a day…” I shook my head. “How was yours?”
“Routine. So dull, I had nothing to report. One of the kids has a sleepover in a couple of days, so that will be a nightmare for them.” He laughed.
I joined in. Sleepovers were dangerous. That many kids in one room…hyping each other up…shit could go sideways in a blink. Then there’d be human children in our world using magic and killing us with only a thought.
Working in Bridges, we joked about all the shit that might go wrong. It was the only way to get through it. Bunny could’ve killed me.
The man with the dragon ink could have killed me, or worse.
It was a dangerous job, but I liked the rush.
“So what didn’t you put in your report?” Crispin gave me a look as we walked toward our favorite bar. It’s one branch up and overlooks the sports field. If we’re lucky, there’ll be a game on. If not, there’ll be a game on the screen.
“Kid’s mother moved in with her boyfriend, who has an adult son. The adult son was very occupied.”
“How occupied?”
“Didn’t realize I was in his closet, watching every stroke.” My tail whipped around, and I gave the end a stroke to make it clear. I’d show him the video, but the dragon will be rather too noticeable, and not reporting that shit will drop me in the shit, something I’d rather not do.
Crispin nods. “Nice. Will you pop in to check on him again?”
“Definitely. It’s a small perk—”
“Was it a small perk?”
I roll my eyes. “I don’t know. Unlike you, I don’t spend my downtime watching clips on Scream and Steam.”
“You should record him next time, become a creator. Content like that can rake it in.”
“Speaking from experience?” My tail flicks his arm.
“Ha! I only post scream content. I got a good clip of a pet cat two nights ago. It was hissing and making all kinds of noises as it stalked along the kitchen bench.”
I stared at him. And I thought I liked the rush… “And where were you?”
“Overhead kitchen cupboard. Father came to see what the fuss was about and carried on. Then I knocked his liquor bottle out of the cupboard. He almost fainted. I popped out before he gathered up the courage to investigate.”
“And people pay for that?”
“Yeah…I post the first bit as a teaser, then they pay to find out what happened. Easy money.”
Easy money.
Bridges didn’t care if we posted content, though there were guidelines.
The Scream stuff served as a warning about the dangers of the human world, and the Steam stuff enabled other monsters to feel as though they were the ones crossing into the human world and sneaking through houses.
From what I’d read, anyway. And while I’d seen a few clips on social media, I wasn’t a member as a creator or subscriber.
For one, I didn’t want to put myself in the path of a pet that might tear me apart, nor could I come up with cool scare-pranks. Until today, I’d never considered the other side of the site. I’d seen humans fucking before. It wasn’t anything special.
We had directives on what to do if an adult was harming a child.
We didn’t harm kids; we just didn’t want them in our world.
They were too dangerous. Those reports sucked, and a special team then dealt with them.
The Bridge Guard was moved on, as we couldn’t start caring about the kids.
That rule had come about because a tender-hearted monster had let the kid escape into our world… It had not ended well.
“You should check out the site, get a feel for the content.” Crispin motioned for me to go up to the bar first.
I followed the spiral staircase up around the tree and entered the bar that stretched across several trunks. Stone and glass mixed with living wood, unlike the human houses, which are all static and dead.
“I’m not going to start posting.” I shook my head. “It was a one-off.”
Crispin laughed. “If you catch him again, record it, and I’ll show you how to post.”
“I can figure out how to post,” I snapped.
“You’ll be able to afford your house sooner. Or do you want to keep living with your brother?”
As a brother, he was fine. We got on great.
As a roommate, he was a fucking nightmare.
Worse than a human toddler. Santa, I might prefer to share an apartment with a human toddler.
They were less messy and less inquisitive.
He did not understand personal space or boundaries, and I swear if he took my clothes one more time because he needed something to wear, I was going to throw him through a portal that led to the woman who bred cats—she needed checked on because she still saw portals.
There was a special team for those people who never grow out of believing in magic, but we’d all heard about her and others like her
I sighed. “I’ll consider it. And since you’re getting the easy money, you can buy the first drink.”