Chapter 35 Greer
Chapter thirty-five
Greer
I stand on the sidewalk between my and Avery’s childhood homes. It’s been years since I’ve been here. Actually been here, anyway. The chipping door from my trip down memory lane is back to the new one. My parents kept the door I had gotten replaced for them.
It’s sadly funny that while I thought I bought it at the time for aesthetic reasons, it was more than that. Like I told Kai, Remi, and Sam, deep down, I did want them to love me, and this was my way to show them I cared.
She and my dad always complained about that old door, and when I finally got them one and they weren’t happy about it, I thought they were rejecting me, like my mom had with the ornament. But I think they thought I was rejecting them, the way I was raised and the home I was raised in.
My stomach swirls with conflict as I stare at the door in question.
I have a lot of anger and confusion over how to heal my relationship with my parents, and I understand it’s going to take time.
Just because I had a wild three nights in some magical town with beings that shouldn’t be real doesn’t mean everything will be automatically fixed.
But for the first time in three years, I want to try. I want to attempt to mend fences with them. Time is only moving forward, not back. I won’t have forever with them, just like they won’t have forever with me.
“Greer?”
At Avery’s shocked voice, I turn my head toward her. She’s standing at her parents’ front door, her mouth agape.
“Avery,” I say back.
She’s frozen in the doorway, blinking at me. After she regains her bearings, she steps back inside, and I think she’s going to close the door on me, but she comes back into view a few seconds later. She pulls the door shut and runs out in boots and a coat that are far too big for her.
“Avery.” I laugh softly. “What—”
She slams into me, cutting off my air supply as she hugs me tight to her body. “Oh my god, Greer. I thought you might be dead!”
I crinkle my brow in confusion as I regain my breath and pull back. “Sorry,” I say. “I should have texted you when I got reception back.” I meant to, but my mind was tangled with thoughts of Holly’s Restaurant and what to say to Avery and my parents.
And there’s also Tim. I want to call him to apologize and tell him I’m not going to ask for his job to be taken away. In fact, I think he deserves a bigger bonus and a raise for putting up with me. If Mr. Cross disagrees, I’ll use some of my bonus to pay him.
Avery grips my shoulders as her blue eyes stare into mine.
“I’ve been trying to reach you. I even attempted to check your location this morning, but I couldn’t get anything.
At first, I thought you were just ignoring me, but I got increasingly worried when you didn’t message me anything else about work or Tim.
Why didn’t you text me back or answer my calls or emails? ”
I think of the one text that came through in the hotel room, but other than that, I didn’t get any. She did say she’d been trying to call me in the present Remi showed me, but I was still doubting everything I was seeing at the time.
I pull out my phone as Avery drops her hands.
My eyes widen when I see the many missed notifications that have now come through, even a missed call from my mom and dad.
My heart pounds in my ears, and emotion swells in my throat.
I’ve tried to deny that the people in my life care about me, but they do, especially the woman standing in front of me.
Avery’s proved time and time again that she does; I’ve just been too blind to see it, too jealous of what I thought she had all these years that I didn’t—not to mention being stuck in the endless wheel of always trying to prove my worth.
I clear my throat so I can speak. “I’m so sorry—I didn’t get them. I didn’t mean to worry you.”
Avery exhales, the cold air of her frozen breath floating around us. “You freaking scared me. I thought I was going to have to tell your family you were missing on Christmas.”
“I’m here.”
Those two words transform her demeanor from worried to suspicious. “Wait. If you didn’t see my texts or missed calls, then why are you here? You avoid this neighborhood like the plague.”
Her loaded question is complicated to answer, but I settle for the easiest one. “Because I want to be.”
Avery’s brow rises, and she laughs disbelievingly. “Yeah, right. You don’t even like when I talk about coming here, much less on Christmas. You said as much when we last talked.”
I consider if this is where we should have this discussion—in the middle of the sidewalk between our two childhood homes, on Christmas Day, in the freezing cold.
My eyes drift to the spot where Kai showed me the memory of us playing in the snow with Cooper, and warmth fills my chest. Actually, we’re in the perfect place to talk.
I turn to look back at her, collecting my thoughts before I speak. “I’ve been a bad friend, Avery. More than that, I’ve been a horrible boss, daughter, coworker, and person.” I chuckle to myself. “Basically a bad everything.”
Avery’s eyes narrow, and she shakes her head, mouth opening to speak.
I hold up my hand to stop her. “No, you don’t have to placate me; it’s true.
I know it, you know it, the people in my life know it.
You were right to call me a Scrooge, and my parents were right to call me an Ice Queen, because I was.
I’m here not only because I wanted to see you but also because I needed to say I’m sorry.
I know it’s not much, but it’s where I want to start. ”
Avery stares at me without blinking, and for a second, I think she’s going to fall over. But then she reaches out and places her cold hand on my forehead. “Are you okay? Did you get into an accident or something and hit your head?” She says it so seriously I laugh.
Her features wrinkle deeper at the sound. I know it’s because I don’t usually laugh—or at least, I hadn’t laughed. Not until I found my way to Elysian Pines.
“I didn’t hit my head, but I did do a lot of thinking.”
Avery drops her hand, eyes not leaving mine. “At the Roads Motel?”
“Would you believe me if I told you I stayed at the cutest inn and met some people who helped me see a few things about my life I wanted to change?”
“Did you just describe an inn as cute?”
I smile. “I did.”
“And did you say you talked to people? Like actually talked to them and made friends?”
Her disbelief would almost be comical if it weren’t true. I don’t make friends. “Um,” I start, thinking of the three Nephilim and all the things they did to me. A coy smile works its way onto my lips before I continue. “I don’t know if you’d exactly call them friends.”
Avery cocks her head to the side and stares at me, taking in the curve of my lips and the way I said friends. After a long pause, her eyes bug out of her head. “Wait, you became ‘friends’ with more than one at the same time?!”
The way she says it makes me flush, and I duck my chin. “Yes, that’s what I’m saying.”
She clicks her tongue against her teeth before a breathless laugh leaves her. Her eyes glimmer with amusement, and I can see she wants to tease me. It’s been a long time since we’ve acted like friends, however, so I understand her hesitance.
“Well, then, maybe you can tell me about it sometime?” The hope in her voice fills my chest with warmth.
“I would love that.”
Avery shivers, and I nod to her door. “You should get inside; it’s cold.”
She nods and turns toward her house. When I don’t follow, she looks over her shoulder and stops, a little smile at the corner of her mouth. “Aren’t you coming?”
My heart thuds in my chest. “You want me to come in?”
“You told me you’d tell me about the ‘friends’ you made sometime. This is ‘sometime,’ isn’t it?”
I nibble the inside of my cheek. “I suppose it is.”
“It’s also Christmas, and your parents are inside. I’m sure they’d love to see you. Josh will never admit it, but he’d like it, too.”
I lift a dubious brow because I know she’s just being nice.
“Like I said.” She smirks. “He’ll never admit it.”
I shift my gaze to her left hand, seeing the diamond ring sparkling on it. I had accepted that what I saw with Kai, Remi, and Sam was real, but this only confirms it beyond a reasonable doubt.
“Congratulations,” I say. Avery looks confused, and I point to her hand. “On your engagement.”
Realization lights her features, and she plays with the band. “I wish you could have been there.”
I want to say “I know,” but how do I explain to her I was there but not really? “I’m here now,” I say quietly.
“So that means you’ll join us?”
I look at the outside of Avery’s family’s house, the large front window filled with their glowing tree.
Memories of Christmas Past and Present, of the future I might have with people who care for me, people I care for in return, crowd my mind.
The idea is nice compared to being alone, more than nice. Yet, I hesitate.
Avery steps close to me and takes my hand. “I know a lot has happened, Greer. But if you’re really sorry, if you really want to talk to me, to your parents, come inside. Spend Christmas with your family.”
My family. Including Avery, the one person who has never given up on me, who’s always stood by my side even when I was awful to her. Even when I did everything in my power to push her away, to convince her I was an Ice Queen.
“I know you’re saying it, but…” I swallow. “Do you really want that?”
She grips my hand. “You came here, on Christmas, the holiday you hate more than anything. We’re standing outside in the cold, and you’re apologizing. I may not completely understand why, but you’re my oldest friend. I’m always going to give you the benefit of the doubt.”
“Why?”
“Because I love you, Greer.”
“Even after how horrible I’ve been?”
“I won’t pretend you’ve made it easy, that I haven’t wanted to give up sometimes.”
“But you didn’t, even when you could have.”
“When I love someone, I stay, through the good and the bad. Especially when that person needs love, even if they don’t think they do.”
I step forward and throw my arms around her.
Her surprised squeak hits my ear, but a moment later, she’s hugging me back.
We stand there for a bit, just holding each other, and the little girl who still lives inside me heals as she hugs her friend again.
She pushed her away because she didn’t know what else to do.
Heat blooms behind my ribs, and my eyes fill with tears. I pull back to see that Avery’s are suspiciously glassy as well.
“Are you sure you’re alright?”
I nod and swallow the lump in my throat. “Never been better.”
She drops her hand to mine and tugs me toward the house. “Come on. Everyone will be wondering what’s going on, and your parents will be glad to see you’re alright.”