27. Adrian
TWENTY-SEVEN
Ten Months Later
“Hey, hey! Where did you get that lighter?” Zach shouted at his daughter, hurrying away from the grill after a giggling preteen girl waving a lighter and bottle rockets over her head. I laughed, watching him take off while I kept an eye on the hot dogs and hamburgers in front of me.
Our backyard was full of people laughing and yelling, and my chest was fit to burst. After getting Nataliya back from Ian Hayes, after everything we’d gone through, we’d promised to come together a few times a year to remember that we were a family, found as it was.
I wanted them with me on the 4th of July. It was my favorite holiday growing up, before my parents passed, and I hadn’t allowed myself to enjoy it in years. During my time in the SEALs, it was easy because we were mostly away on missions, but even the few times I’d been in the States, I had gone to ground and avoided the whole celebration.
This year, I wanted my family around me when the fireworks went off. “Do these look good?” I asked Drake as I poked at the hot dogs.
“Half of them look burnt.”
“Then they’re perfect,” Nate said and handed me a plate. “Pull them off.” I moved the hot dogs off the fire and put cheese on half of the burgers. “Dinner’s up!” Nate hollered, bringing everyone running for the picnic tables Nataliya and I had set up.
There were so many people gathered around. When Nataliya came to sit beside me, I smiled as she leaned into me, almost as if on instinct. “This is nice,” she said.
“Loud,” I pointed out.
“That’s all right,” she said with a shrug. “It’s been a quiet couple of months, after all.” She nudged my shoulder. “I wouldn’t want you to get bored.”
I snorted. “Being bored is not something I’m worried about,” I said.
Drake, who was across from me holding one of his sons while the toddler ate a hot dog that had been cut into pieces, laughed. “Seriously, Adrian?” he asked. “You’re not bored being stuck at a desk?”
Admittedly, I’d worried about boredom myself. But it felt right. I liked coming home at the end of the day to Nataliya and Elias. I liked all of us having dinner together and hearing about Elias’s day at school.
Being an analyst, too, was surprisingly fulfilling. I liked digging into the information and helping to put together a plan of action. Even as a SEAL, there was this underpinning of flying by the seat of my pants at all times, like no matter how trained I was, I always had to be ready for shit to hit the fan. Being an analyst made me feel solid, like I knew exactly what to expect.
I bit into my hamburger and chewed it, thoughtful. “I like it,” I said finally, deciding that the simple answer was enough.
“More than field work?” Nate pressed. He’d been the last of us to leave the SEALs, and he still struggled with it sometimes. He would never say it—he was more than happy to be settled down with Emily and Matty—but he was the youngest of us. He still had something of a wild streak.
I nodded. “Yeah, Shaw, more than field work.” I slung an arm over Nataliya’s shoulders. “I’m looking forward to spending time with a cute new coworker too.”
There were soft whoops all along the table, and Nataliya flushed with pride. “I haven’t even started my classes yet,” she said. “You’ll be waiting awhile.”
It took a small miracle to untangle the mess that Nataliya was in because of Ian Hayes. His trial had been relatively fast, and he’d been found guilty of treason. He wouldn’t see the outside of a maximum-security facility ever again. The men who conspired with him were also facing charges, but Nataliya and I both suspected that those trials would be far more drawn out.
But after he was arrested, Nataliya had to face Immigration since even though she’d come to the country legally, she’d been living in the US under a false identity. It took months of us leaping through the bureaucratic hoops to get immigration paperwork refiled, which allowed her to get proper identification and a residency permit.
By then, she’d met my boss, and once he’d seen what she could do on a computer, he’d encouraged her to enroll in FBI training. They were in desperate need of capable agents in the cybersecurity division. It wasn’t what Nataliya had imagined she’d be doing, but I could see how much she loved it.
She leaned her head against my shoulder for just a moment, and the conversation moved on around us. When the food was gone, everyone made their way back to the lawn to spread out blankets. We were going to set off some fireworks for the kids.
As everyone got settled, Nataliya helped me pass out beer to the adults. “Before we get started,” I said, “I wanted to raise a toast to Kyle Cuddy and Roger Gentry.” I raised my beer into the air before I took a sip of it, and the others followed suit. “Cuddy was everyone’s little brother. He just wanted to do his job well and be with his family. Roger was the other side of the coin: he was everyone’s big brother, always looking out for us.” Tears stung behind my eyes, but I blinked them away. I had been focused on getting justice for my fallen teammates for so long that I hadn’t let myself properly mourn. “I applied to get their names added to the memorial in DC for service members lost in action, and they approved it. Their parents are coming in for the dedication, and I’d like it if you guys could make it too.” There was a ripple of agreements, and that burning feeling was back again. I cleared my throat.
Drake and Zach jumped up to take over setting off fireworks, and I settled myself on the blanket Nataliya had spread out. “Are you okay?” she asked. “You got a little misty-eyed there.”
I nodded. “I’m just…happy,” I said. She hummed in agreement, and we watched the first few smaller fireworks that were sent into the sky. “Where’s Elias?”
Nataliya giggled and gestured over to where our son had settled himself next to Zach’s daughter, Lacy. Matty was sitting on his other side. When we’d all gotten together for the first time a few months ago, Elias had been thrilled to reconnect with Matty . . . and he’d fallen head over heels in puppy love with Lacy. The little girl was older and tolerated him civilly enough, but it was plain to see that he was enamored with her. He sat beside her bravely, barely flinching at the loud pops and bangs of the fireworks as they went off overhead.
“I think she’s holding his hand,” Nataliya said. “She called him and Matty ‘the sweetest little brothers’ earlier.”
I snorted. Poor kid. “It probably wasn’t fun to be compared to a six-year-old.”
Nataliya shrugged. “I think he’s just glad she wants to spend time with him. Besides,” she said, leaning into me, “I think there’s a little girl in his class he’s got a crush on. Her name is Mia. Every time he mentions her, he turns bright red. It’s so cute.”
I chuckled. I’d heard the name “Mia” a time or two myself. Ah, young love. He had just turned ten; it was still adorable. Nataliya and I were going to enjoy teasing him.
We sat and watched as the fireworks display went on, but I knew the end was coming. “Drake said they wanted me to help with the finale,” I said, getting ready to stand.
“Wait,” Nataliya said. She passed a paper to me.
I looked down, but it was too dark to see what was on it. “I can’t?—”
“Go help out,” she said nonchalantly…which was as suspicious as a man walking around with a trench coat on. “Let me know what you think after, okay?”
“All…right.” She leaned forward and bused my cheek with a kiss, and I stood and made my way over to where Drake and Zach were holding torch lighters.
They handed me one of the lighters, and together, we set fire to the various wicks on the big box of fireworks. We rushed back to a safe distance as balls of fire shot off into the sky. Everyone’s eyes were drawn up; I could hear the soft oohs and ahhs behind me, but I was distracted by the paper Nataliya had handed me.
“Hey, give me a light,” I said to Drake, who pulled out his cell and turned on the flashlight. He aimed it at the paper in my hand, and my heart leapt into my throat.
It was an ultrasound. With Nataliya’s name across the top.
“Holy shit,” I said out loud. Drake slapped me on the back.
“Congrats, dude!” I barely heard him over the roar as the final burst of fireworks started.
I turned and scanned the crowd for Nataliya. She must have gone back inside. “Watch Elias for me?” I asked. “Make sure he doesn’t run off and elope with your daughter?”
Zach let out a flat laugh. “Ha ha. So funny, asshole.”
Drake slapped him on the back again. “We got him,” he said. “Go see your girl.”
I jogged up the lawn and slid the patio door open. Nataliya was leaning against the counter, smirking. “It took you long enough,” she said.
I held up the ultrasound. “Is this for real?”
She cocked her head. “Do you think I would fake something like that?” It wasn’t a question whether she could or not. We both knew that she could.
But I also knew that she’d never prank me about this. We’d had far too many conversations about the possibility of more kids. We’d gone as far as to get testing done to anticipate the risk of a new baby being affected by Loorer’s. Even if Elias had made a full recovery, it was a fear that lived in the back of both of our minds.
I smiled. “Really, sweetheart?”
Nataliya nodded. “Really, really.” I crossed the kitchen in two strides and grabbed her up, spinning her. Nataliya giggled against my neck. “Does this mean you’re happy?”
I set her back on her feet but didn’t let her go. Beneath the dazzling smile was a thread of apprehension. While I had never met Nataliya’s ex-husband and probably never would, I’d long since decided that if I ever did, I would punch the bastard in the face. She wasn’t gun-shy about a lot of things, but I could always tell when something opened the old wound that he’d made when he abandoned them.
I kissed her, long and deep, and she sighed into my mouth. “I’m so happy,” I murmured, sliding my hand over where she was still flat and tried to picture her round with our growing child. I couldn’t wait. “You’re amazing.”
She kissed me again. “I love you, Adrian.”
Looking into her deep, hazel eyes, it struck me that this was my actual life. That I was lucky enough to have found the woman of my dreams…even when I didn’t dare to dream about her myself. “I love you too, sweetheart,” I said. “I always will.”