Chapter 19 – Nathan
CHAPTER 19
NATHAN
S al’s voice sounded far away, echoing through the darkness like a distant memory. It felt like it was coming from another world, a world I was no longer part of. I ached to respond, to call out to him, but I was trapped in this abyss, unable to break free. His words were urgent, filled with a desperation that mirrored my own, but they were just sounds, lost in the void.
Then I heard Emma. Her voice was trembling, breaking through the haze, and I could hear her saying... her goodbyes?
Panic surged within me, a fierce, burning need to reach her, to tell her I wasn’t gone, not yet. But no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t pull myself back. The void was a relentless grip, a suffocating presence that kept me anchored in its cold embrace.
Emma’s soft hands touched my face, a gentle, familiar touch that sent a jolt of warmth through me. Her fingers were trembling, and I could feel her tears falling onto my skin. She was so close, and yet, I was powerless to comfort her, to let her know I was still here, fighting. The darkness was a cruel barrier, mocking my every effort to reach her.
In my mind, I could see her clearly. I envisioned wrapping my arms around her, pulling her close, whispering reassurances as I swam us both up–up-up to safety.
But it was all a mirage, a cruel trick of the mind. The reality was far more brutal. My body was unresponsive, heavy with the weight of the impending oblivion.
Her voice grew fainter, her touch slipping away. Panic morphed into a profound sense of loss, a deep, gnawing emptiness.
I strained with everything I had, trying to hold onto the sensation of her touch, the sound of her voice. But it was like grasping at smoke. She was slipping through my fingers, and there was nothing I could do to stop it.
The darkness grew thicker, colder, and the last remnants of warmth from her touch faded away. My heart ached with a sorrow so deep it felt like it would tear me apart. She was gone. The void closed in around me, an inescapable blackness that swallowed all hope. The realization that there was no going back was like a knife to the soul, a final, brutal severance from the world I knew and loved. All I had left was the echo of her voice and the memory of her touch, as the darkness consumed everything.
As the seductive weightlessness of death beckoned, I tried to clench my fists, focusing on the pain in my side where the shrapnel tore through my ribs.
Here… Now… This is where I am–I don't want to go anywhere else.
As I floated in the void, fragments of my life flashed, a random slideshow of feelings and thoughts. I remembered my first day as a rookie cop, the pride on my father’s face when I graduated from the academy. I thought of Emma, the way her eyes lit up when she laughed, and the nights we spent talking about our future together. Regrets surfaced too – the arguments, the missed moments, the things I should have said, my stubborn ways cocking things up. God, why am I so stubborn sometimes.
Pain sliced through my core as I summoned all my strength to sit up
My scream was muffled by something, and I tried to spit it out, but it was stuck to my mouth. Flashbacks of every alien movie I’d seen as a kid raced through my mind as I ripped the face-spider off my lips, gagging as a long tube emerged from my throat.
“Emma!” My voice, ragged and hoarse, was unrecognizable in my own ears.
Machines and monitors beeped and alarms went off all around me as I frantically scanned my surroundings for her face.
Harsh fluorescent lights above were blinding, and the sterile smell of antiseptic filled my nostrils, mingling with the sharp, metallic scent of blood.
“Woah, take it easy.” Scotty’s calm hands were firm yet gentle as he pushed me back down. I fell against the lumpy VA hospital pillow, my body sinking into its rough, uncomfortable surface.
I groaned, cradling my bandaged ribs. “Where’s Emma? Is she–”
“She’s fine, Nate.” Scotty patted my chest and finally, I surrendered, laying back as nurses swarmed in. “Emma brought your plane down off-shore near Martinique.”
“She… she was able to land the plane?” I panted as the nurses fussed over the IV I’d ripped out and tried to get me re-situated.
“Ehh…” Scotty squinted one eye, wrinkling his nose. “‘ Landed’ might be a strong word. I'd give it... one out of ten to be honest. That tail of yours was shot to hell. It's amazing she got as far as she did. But the highlight reel is that she walked away with cuts and bruises. Tough little cookie, that chick.”
“Yeah.” I chuckled, looking down at the leopard’s bite mark on my forearm. “You have no idea.”
“You can definitely tell she’s Jax’s sister.” Scotty chuckled. “I can’t get over how much they look alike.”
“What are you talking about?” I grimaced. “They look nothing alike.”
“The guys are all calling her girl-Jax .” Scotty laughed. “She looks like Jax with a smaller nose and a wig.”
“Gross, dude.” I frowned. “No way.”
“Wait a sec.” Scotty narrowed his eyes. “Tell me you didn’t.”
My stomach dropped.
“Didn’t what?” I pressed my head back into the pillow as the nurse examined my bleeding stitches.
“Oh, Nate.” Scotty pinched the bridge of his nose. “No.”
“What? Ow–” I started to shrug, but suddenly the slightest movement felt like I was being torn in half.
“Your whole face is red.” Scotty crossed his arms. “Tell me you didn’t violate the bro code.”
“Bro code?” I sucked air through my clenched teeth as she fixed the bandage. “I didn’t violate shit.”
“No fucking exes, moms… and NO SIBLINGS.” He held up his hands. “It’s like... the goldenest of golden rules.”
“Dads are okay though?” I gestured. “Just making sure before I– OW!”
“Hold still!” The nurse snapped at me as she reinserted the catheter for my IV.
I let out a long irritated sigh. “Okay so… maybe I messed up a little.”
“Dammit, man.” Scotty sank into the chair next to my bed. “Jax is gonna freak out.”
“You don’t say shit.” I held up my pointer finger in a warning. “I’ll talk to him myself.”
“What the hell were you thinking?” His eyebrows pinched together. “Your job was to keep her safe ... from even you if necessary.”
“I did keep her safe!” The words came out sounding more hostile than I meant for them to. “There’s... NOTHING... I wouldn’t do to protect her.”
Scotty’s expression softened as the nurse scurried out of the room, and he leaned forward, bracing his elbows on his knees. “You okay, Nate? It almost sounds like–”
“Yeah, I know.” I swallowed hard, huffing as I looked out the window. “I’m fucking screwed, aren’t I?”
“Well.” Scotty took a deep breath. “If you really like the girl, you’d better be ready to have that talk with Jax. Convince him that you plan on treating her right. And that you're free of STDs. And that you're no longer a lady's man.”
“You think he'll kill me?” I raised an eyebrow.
“Oh, worse than that.” He leaned back, interlacing his fingers behind his neck and kicking his feet up on the edge of my bed. “That’s his baby sister, you know? He's gonna rip your liver out with his bare hands.”
“Thanks.” I rolled my eyes. “You always know just what to say.”