Chapter 30 #2
After I finish, I glance around at the cave behind me and realize that he, of course, just has the one bed.
I don’t want him to be more upset with me than he already is and knowing that I’ve displaced him from his bed since I’ve been here, I decide to find my own place to sleep.
I quickly realize this is something I should have done earlier in the day, as there are no options without me creating something.
I think I could create a hammock out of some of his vines, but with the lack of light, it was going to be extremely difficult.
So for tonight I would just settle down by the fire and tomorrow I would make my hammock.
Setting my plan in motion, I look at the pile of clothing he has in the cave and grab one of his extra tunics. I bring it out and hold it up so he can see it. “Can I use this tonight?”
He looks at it, then nods, turning back to look at the fire. I let out a breath, realizing he truly hates talking to me. But at least he was still kind, letting me borrow his shirt.
I pull it on over my dress and I head into the trees to find a bush with large leaves.
I pull a few of them from the plant and bunch them up to make a makeshift pillow.
It's barely two inches thick, but it’s better than nothing at this point.
I place my back to the cave so I’ll feel somewhat protected, not that there seem to be any predators in this tiny oasis.
I lay down facing the fire with my head resting on my leaf pillow.
After a few moments of silence, Apollo finally speaks. “What are you doing?”
I tilt my head up to look at him. I frown as I answer, “I’m going to sleep, what does it look like I’m doing?”
“But why are you laying there? Use the bed,” he says roughly, motioning his head in the direction of the cave.
I shake my head as I answer, “No, that’s your bed. You’ve already let me use it the past few days, it’s not fair that just because I’m here you don’t get to sleep in your own bed. I’m fine here.”
I drop my head back down and watch the fire, not really wanting to talk anymore. Apollo was exhausting to try to talk to. He never says what he’s really thinking, and always leaves me frustrated, wanting more.
After a few minutes, I hear him stand up and assume he’s heading to bed, but a surprise yelp escapes me when I’m suddenly scooped up in his arms. “What are you doing?”
He says nothing as he walks into the cave and gently sets me on the bed. Then he just turns around and goes back and settles down by the fire.
“Apollo!” I yell in frustration, getting out of bed and storming over to him. I stand in front of where he’s seated with my hands on my hips. “I said I don’t want to sleep there, it’s your bed,” I tell him adamantly.
“I’m not going to sleep in my bed while you’re out here laying on the ground.”
“Why not? Why do you care? It’s not like you even like me,” I shoot back, crossing arms, feeling a little vulnerable admitting I know how he feels about me.
“You are my brother’s wife. He can’t be here to take care of you. So until he gets here, it’s my job. Now get into that bed,” he demands angrily.
“So that’s what I am to you, a job? A burden to take care of?” I ask, feeling hurt by his words.
“Yes, now go.” He narrows his eyes at me and points inside the cave.
Not wanting him to see me cry, I turn and quickly walk into the cave, climbing onto the bed and turning my back to him as I curl into a ball, trying to muffle my cries into my hands.
I barely know him, why does his dismissal of me sting so much?
But I do know the reason, because deep down I thought he might be my mate too.
In a way, my husbands have felt like they were my fated mates, if such a thing existed.
I’ve read lots of romance books with shifters in them, and fated mates were something they always talked about.
They often referred to it as a pulling sensation towards that person.
Which is what I felt to Ry, Brax and Indy.
But also to Silver and now Apollo. Why was I having this reaction to so many people?
Maybe with Apollo it was because he was so similar to Indy.
Although their personalities seem very different.
Indy was charming and flirtatious, looking at me with heat and lust since the moment I met him.
But Apollo, he looked at me with contempt, like I was a disruption to his perfect lonely life out here.
What was he doing out here all alone, anyway?
This was no way to live. But there was no way in hell he’d listen to my opinion on anything, I can tell he’s made up his mind about me.
I was an annoyance. Like a pet he didn’t want to keep, but was forced to take care of.
Well, I could take care of myself, I didn’t need him.
Tomorrow, I would make my own bed and no matter what, I’d refuse to sleep in his bed, even if it meant we’d both end up sleeping on the hard ground.
I hated the feeling of being lonely, being cast aside and ignored.
But a far worse feeling was being a burden.
It’s what I feared my mates saw when they looked at me.
No, I wouldn’t be a burden on Apollo. My mates might show up tomorrow, or it could be weeks from now.
I know I can’t go out looking for them, but I can take care of myself while I wait.