34 - Haley
34
Haley
It’s a date .
Lucas’s parting comment stayed with me all night, and then through the weekend. Sara came home from the hospital. Harper and I divided up the house chores so she could take it easy, per the doctor’s orders. We got groceries and meal-prepped enough food to last us two weeks, and then I took Bran to the zoo.
But despite all those distractions, I couldn’t stop thinking about what Lucas had said.
He wanted it to be a date. I wanted it to be a date, too. We were on the same page.
But it felt like a massive step forward.
Did that mean he wanted to have a relationship with me? Because that also meant being a father figure to Bran. I’m sure he’d considered that, but I knew I wouldn’t be comfortable with moving forward until I heard him say out loud that he understood.
There was also the bigger issue: the fact that I needed to tell him the truth. That was an even bigger priority than before, now that he’d spent time with Bran.
God, I felt so guilty about it now. Lucas had helped take care of Bran for two days without knowing the boy was his son. His flesh and blood.
“Did you have a good time with Lucas?” I asked him after an open house on Sunday.
Bran nodded while coloring in his book. “He’s nice. He taught me all about cars.”
“He did?”
“I know about car engines. And car transmissions. And, um, car tires. And lots of other car stuff.”
“That’s great. Where did Lucas sleep when he was here?”
“On the couch. I woke up to go potty in the middle of the night and saw him.”
“Did he ever go into Mommy’s room?”
“I don’t think so. We mostly played in my room. He bought me a bunch of new books.” He looked up from his coloring book. “Will you read the one about Dash to me tonight?”
“Didn’t Lucas already read that one to you?”
“But I want you to read it now. So you can learn about Dash, too.”
“Okay,” I promised him.
My ovaries were twitching like crazy. Lucas, the man who’d knocked me up and then disappeared from our lives, was an honest-to-God father figure. Genuinely so, and not just because he was trying to impress me.
If I could travel back in time, the high school version of me would never believe it.
I was excited for our date on Monday night. But beneath that excitement was a growing sense of dread.
Sara was right. I had to tell Lucas the truth, and I needed to do it soon. The longer I waited, the worse it would be.
Fortunately, I had other distractions. Rather than take Bran to Kindergarten on Monday morning, I dressed him in his little suit, combed his hair until I was almost satisfied with how he looked, then drove him across town to the Worthington Academy. It felt like we had walked onto a college campus. The buildings were all red brick and white columns, with perfectly-manicured grass in between. Students of all ages hurried from building to building in their cute little uniforms.
I was trying not to get my hopes up, but I could definitely picture Bran going to school here. It would give him such an advantage when he eventually applied for college.
When I walked into the administrative building, I found Shay waiting inside. He was wearing a three-piece suit and was tapping furiously on his phone.
“I didn’t expect you to be here,” I said.
“I thought you might like some backup while talking to admissions. One second.” He typed even faster. Then he shoved his phone in his pocket, chest heaving with a sigh. “Sorry. Prepping for court later.”
“If you need to be somewhere else…”
“There’s nowhere I’d rather be right now,” he said with a grin. “You must be Brandon. I’m Shay, a friend of your mom.”
“My friends call me Bran,” my son replied, shaking Shay’s hand. “But if you’re one of Mom’s friends, you can call me Bran, too.”
“That’s really nice of you.”
“You’re not going to stage a sit-in, are you?” I teased.
Shay smirked. “We’ll see how the interview goes. And if you bribe me with more photos like what you sent while you were in Vegas.”
“That can be arranged,” I said with a suggestive little smile.
His eyes sparkled with unspoken thoughts, but then he asked, “Do you trust me?”
I furrowed my brow. “Depends on what we’re talking about, but in general? Yes.”
“Good,” he said. “I’m going to let you do most of the talking, obviously. But if the opportunity comes up, I think I have a good angle of attack.”
“I’ll take all the help I can get!” I said truthfully.
We spoke with the administrative assistant behind the desk, and were led through several rooms before reaching the one belonging to Juliana Vortsch, the head of admissions. Even though she had a warm smile and a kind disposition, I couldn’t help but feel intimidated. This meeting might affect the entire course of Bran’s life.
Shay’s presence was definitely comforting. I wasn’t in this alone.
“Ms. Mercer, I’m thrilled you and your son were able to come in on such short notice,” Juliana said warmly from behind a massive oak desk.
“We’re thrilled you invited us,” I replied.
“I want to emphasize that this isn’t any sort of test, or interrogation,” she went on. “This is just a casual discussion to get to know you and your son. To put a face to the name, and to make sure he would be a great fit at our school. Can you tell me about your son’s personality and interests?”
For a while, Bran was the focus of the discussion. Juliana asked about his favorite books, activities, and subjects. I talked about his personality, and how he handled social situations with peers. How he responded to structure and routine, and what kind of learning environment suited him best.
Then, to my surprise, Bran was sent to the adjacent room to play, and the questions shifted to focus on me. How I supported his learning at home. What values were most important to me when raising my child. How he responded to discipline and guidance, and the kinds of activities we did together as a family outside of school.
“Well, we have a small family,” I admitted. “Bran’s father isn’t in the picture, but I have a lot of support from my sister and her husband.”
“Oh, I see,” Juliana said. Her smile didn’t waver, but I detected a note of surprise in her tone. And after that, her questions became more curt.
Was she judging me for being a single mom? I glanced at Shay, who was stone-faced while he listened. There was definitely a shift in the whole vibe. I began to feel my hopes slipping away.
“I don’t think I have any further questions,” Juliana finally said. “Do either of you have any questions for me?”
Shay cleared his throat. “The Worthington Academy has quite the reputation around town. Students who graduate here are fifty percent more likely to be accepted into their first choice for college.”
Juliana smiled proudly. “I see you’ve read the most recent article in The Oregonian. Yes, our college acceptance rates certainly speak volumes.”
“I was struck by another part of that article, actually.” Shay slowly crossed one leg over the other, and it felt like he was going into Attorney Mode. “There are some class-related issues that are concerning. The median income of students admitted to your academy has gone up four hundred percent in the past five years. The Worthington Endowment Fund, which was originally created to help lower-income families afford the tuition here, has since been repurposed for renovations on the school’s new athletic facility.”
Now Juliana’s smile did waver. “We pride ourselves on admitting students from a wide variety of backgrounds. Through no fault of our own, our prestige has led to more families moving from Seattle and San Francisco. That is likely the cause of the rise in median household income for our students.”
“Of course.” Shay dipped his head like a lawyer conceding a point. “However, the price of tuition has risen over the same period. I’m concerned that such changes will further price out students who would make valuable additions to your great school. Especially if the endowment fund continues to be used for renovations, rather than its intended purpose.”
Juliana nodded along. “Absolutely. Your concerns are valid, and I assure you this is an important issue to me and the rest of the faculty.”
“I’m relieved to hear that,” Shay said. “Personally, I think Ms. Mercer’s son would make an excellent candidate for both admission to the school, and for its various scholarships. And what better way to combat the accusations of elitism than by admitting a struggling single mother?”
Struggling single mother? His phrasing made me bristle, but I kept my mouth shut.
“We value your input in this area,” Juliana said. “As we value the support of you and your former firm.”
The three of us chatted a little longer, and then the meeting was over. We collected Bran from the play area, then walked out to the parking lot.
“Sorry for framing your situation that way,” Shay immediately said when we were outside. “I know you’re not struggling , but it was a good angle of attack. Especially since there’s a lot of public pressure on the school to broaden their admissions.”
“Don’t apologize!” I said. “I’ll beg, borrow, and steal if it means getting Bran into this school.”
Bran looked up at me. “You said stealing is wrong.”
“It is wrong. Mommy was just making a joke.”
“I don’t get it.” Bran frowned.
“It wasn’t a very funny joke,” Shay agreed.
“Thank you for being here,” I said. “It was a huge relief having someone else with me, even without the argument you made. Can I repay you with dinner?”
“I like to eat,” Shay smirked. “How about tonight?”
I cringed. “Tonight’s the one night I’m not free. I’m…” There was no use lying, so I spit it out. “I’m taking Lucas out to dinner to thank him for watching Bran while my sister was in the hospital.”
A funny expression came over his face. I opened my car door and helped Bran inside, then slid the door closed.
“Did I say something wrong?” I asked. “You’re not jealous of Lucas, are you?”
Shay shook his head. “Not at all. But… can you tell me what this is, Haley?”
“What do you mean?”
“Are we just having fun, or is there something more here?” Shay shoved his hands in his pockets. “If this is just meaningless sex and naughty texts, that’s fine. I make a great fuck-buddy. But if you want something more, I’m interested in that, too.”
“Oh,” I said. “I don’t know…”
He put a hand up to stop me. “Don’t answer right now. I’d love to get dinner with you, but before we do, I need you to answer that question. Sorry for the bluntness, but I wanted to make my intentions very clear.”
He knocked on the car window and waved at Bran inside, then smiled at me and went to his own car.
I thought about what he’d said the entire way home.
What do I want?