Chapter 4
GILLIAN
Istumbled a bit over my words, distracted by how surreal it was to be sitting across from him after all these years.
“I’d just told Grace about you, and then she saw you at Tyler’s game.
This is a small town, so they were naturally curious about the rumored billionaire.
They looked you up and saw you went to MIT.
Given that and your name, Grace thought you might be the Alex from my past.”
“That’s a smart kid.” His eyes held mine a beat too long, and a warmth radiated from my chest to my stomach.
“Yes, she is. But she’s also in trouble right now.
” I explained about the dating app scheme, how the kids had put their mothers on Second Chance without permission.
As I talked, I watched his hands on the stem of his wine glass—the same long fingers I remembered, though his hands looked stronger now, more lived-in.
“Apparently, they’re concerned about what will happen to us after they leave for college.
As if we can’t live without them.” I chuckled, shaking my head.
“So the kids looked you up, then showed me your photo at our family dinner. I was stunned. But I had to admit it was you. Then, I did the math on your kids.”
His eyes widened, then understanding crossed his face. “You thought I had kids back then and never told you.”
“And perhaps a wife too.”
He leaned forward slightly, closing the space between us. “Okay, yeah. I can see how you came to that conclusion.”
“It bothered me more than I care to admit.” Heat crept into my cheeks, and I had to look away from the intensity in his gaze. “But then I saw your profile, and it all became clear.”
“We both have raised children that weren’t ours,” Alex said softly. “Weird, isn’t it?”
“A little, yes.” The candlelight caught the warmth in his dark eyes, and for a moment I was nineteen again, dizzy with the newness of him.
“The only reason you were on the dating app was because Grace put you on there?” He was still leaning in, his voice lower now.
“That’s right.”
“She did a good job pretending to be you.”
“A little too good.” I tried for lightness, but my pulse quickened when I saw the hint of a smile playing at his lips.
“I thought you’d be married.” He took a sip of his wine, watching me over the rim, and the directness of his stare made my stomach flip.
“I haven’t even gotten close.”
“Again, I’m surprised.” His tone suggested he wasn’t just making conversation.
I swallowed, suddenly aware of how small the table felt between us. “It’s not really been a priority. Grace and my work have kept me busy. Being a single mom makes it hard to date. I have to keep Grace’s needs forefront.”
“I can understand that. If it hadn’t been for my wife, I’d not have been able to work as much as I did.”
A small silence fell between us. So much unsaid. So much to say. Yet words wouldn’t come. I reached for my wine glass to have something to do with my hands.
“Tell me more about your company,” I said, hoping for safer ground than talking about his dead wife.
He described the evolution from idea to product, inspired by his sister’s death.
As he talked, I found myself mesmerized by the passion that animated his features—the same intensity he’d had at twenty-two, but tempered now with experience and loss.
“What started out as two of us in a basement office eventually sold for a lot of money.”
“But it wasn’t the money that motivated you, was it?” I knew the answer before I asked. I’d always known what drove him.
“No, it never was. I’m grateful for my good fortune, but that’s not ever been my ‘why.’”
“What made you decide to sell the company?”
His expression shifted, grew more serious.
“After my wife got sick, it changed my perspective on things. I took a sabbatical to take care of her, and during that time an offer came in. I decided to take it, knowing Mattie wasn’t going to get better.
The kids needed me home, not traveling all the time or working long hours. ”
The grief in his voice was subtle but unmistakable. Without thinking, I reached across the table. My fingers stopped just short of his hand, hovering uncertainly before I pulled them back. The almost-touch hung in the air between us, heavy and moist like air before a thunderstorm.
“How did you find your way to Willet Cove?” I asked quietly.
“It’s strange, actually.” He ran a hand through his hair—a gesture I remembered from a lifetime ago.
“My wife suggested I move the kids to a beach town. This was when we both knew she wasn’t going to live much longer.
She suggested Willet Cove specifically.” A muscle ticked in his jaw.
“A few days after her funeral, I drove the kids up here from San Francisco, where we lived, and rented a few rooms at the inn. It was just what we needed. By the end of our time here, all three of us were in love with the town and the whole vibe. So I put our house in San Francisco on the market, bought a piece of property here that was already zoned for a house. A year later, we moved in. This is our first summer here.”
“It’s strange we haven’t run into each other.”
“Not when you consider how I kind of hid out for the first eight months we lived here. Peter talked me into volunteering as an assistant coach on his baseball team just to get me out of the house.”
“I’m glad he did.” The words came out softer than I intended, and, from the way his eyes darkened, he heard what I wasn’t saying.
Hunter arrived with our hummus plate, breaking the spell.
“No entourage tonight?” Hunter asked me.
“Not tonight, no.” I was grateful for the interruption, for a chance to catch my breath.
“I thought you ladies ran in a pack,” Hunter said.
“We usually do.”
“Good idea in this crazy world,” Hunter said. “Friends who have your back are hard to find.”
After he left, I said to Alex, “My girlfriends and I are in here at least once a week. In fact we were here last night. When they talked me into messaging you back.”
He looked slightly hurt. “Was it a question?”
“Mostly because Grace put my profile on the site without me knowing, not because it wasn’t good to hear from you.” I held his gaze, wanting him to understand. “I simply wasn’t sure what to do.”
“It’s a strange situation. But I’m glad you responded.” The warmth in his voice made my stomach flutter.
As he scooped some hummus onto his plate, I let myself really look at him.
He was even better looking than he’d been fourteen years ago.
His dark complexion had aged well, and he still had a thick head of dark hair.
His eyes were just as kind as they’d been back then, but now a sadness dimmed their light slightly.
I wanted to reach across the table and smooth away the grief etched in the corners of his mouth.
“Do you remember the day we met?” Alex asked, his voice pulling me from my thoughts.
“Of course I do. That coffee shop on 83rd. I looked up and there you were.” The memory was so vivid I could almost smell the coffee, feel the summer heat through the windows.
“You were so beautiful, sitting there, so innocent.” He wasn’t looking at the past suddenly. No, he was looking at me and only me with an intensity that made my breath catch. “I thought in that moment—this is the girl I’m going to marry.”
My throat tightened. “You were wrong about that.”
The words fell between us like stones. For a moment neither of us moved, the weight of all the years—all the paths not taken—heavy between my shoulder blades.
“Those months that summer were some of the best of my life,” Alex said quietly.
“For me too.” I had to pause, had to push past the constriction in my chest. “Perhaps it was like that because we knew it had a shelf life. We knew at the end of that summer you’d go back to Boston to finish school.
I’d continue at the academy in Manhattan.
Maybe that’s why it felt so fun and easy. We knew it would end.”
“I was too young and stupid to realize how rare it is to fall in love so hard and so fast. Or to find someone as extraordinary as you.”
He held my gaze. In fact, I couldn’t look away from him.
“I was waking up to your smile one minute and changing Grace’s diapers the next.”
“We had no choice but to part ways,” Alex said. “I had no permanent job and another year of college to pay for. There was no way I could take care of a family.”
“I knew that. I mean, we were so young.”
“Did you ever think about me?” He leaned forward again, his voice dropping. “Wonder what became of me?”
“I did. I thought about looking you up a thousand times.” The confession felt dangerous, like opening a door I’d kept carefully locked.
“Why didn’t you?”
I took a breath, steadying myself. “Because I didn’t want to know … if you were married. It sounds stupid, but it would’ve crushed me. It was easier to just leave my memories of our short time together alone.”
His expression shifted to surprise, maybe, or recognition. “I understand.”
The moment stretched between us, electric and fragile.
“Tell me how you met your wife,” I said, needing to ground us back in reality.
“She came to work for me as an admin when I first started the company. She was a single mother of two. Five years older than me.” He traced the rim of his glass with one finger. “But we just clicked. By the time I met her, I felt ready to take on the responsibilities of a family.”
I wanted to ask a hundred questions. Did he love her the way he’d loved me? When did he stop thinking about that summer in New York? But I kept my voice neutral. “Was their father in the picture at all?”
Alex shook his head. “He bailed before Bella was even born. Mattie was raising them alone when she came to work for me. Peter was six and Bella was four.”
“I don’t know how anyone could leave their child.”
“Me either. But for their sake and mine, I’m glad he did.”