Chapter 15
DORIAN
The morning after our date at the drive-in, the world was a more beautiful place. Blooms on flower bushes were brighter and the sky had never looked as blue. It almost hurt my eyes. And how had I never noticed how the breeze carried the scents of pine and sea as if they were an expensive perfume?
I got to the store early and zipped around the space straightening displays, dusting shelves, all the while singing to the radio. I never sang. Maybe an occasional hum, but no singing.
Even Poe was cuter than usual, sprawled out on the staff picks table with his face in his paws. He didn’t even turn away when I petted him. “I know, she’s great, right?”
Poe blinked as if he knew exactly who I was talking about.
This buoyant mood was not hard to trace back to the dark-haired woman and that cheek of hers on my chest as we watched the movie.
There was something just so easy between us.
The more time we spent together, the more I felt the undeniable connection.
Could this be it? Had I found my love at last?
Or was I getting ahead of myself? Regardless, I was too high to question myself for long.
Just enjoy the feeling, I told myself. Be grateful for the time with her, even if it ends.
The thought of that made it hard to breathe. Because, somehow, I couldn’t pinpoint exactly when, I’d fallen for the mysterious woman with sad eyes and guarded heart.
Annie arrived five minutes before opening, practically skipping in through the back door.
“Morning,” she called out as she stuck her backpack in the cubby I’d labeled for her.
“Morning.”
She pulled on her apron. “How’s it going?”
“I’m fantastic. You?”
She grinned, tying her apron strings. “Mom was in a good mood this morning. Looks like it’s going around.”
“That right?”
“Some kind of virus, maybe?”
“I do seem to have come down with something,” I said. “I’ve been singing.”
That made her howl with laughter. Making her and her mother laugh could be my full time job if they’d let me.
The moment I opened the front doors, tourists spilled in, mulling about, reading back covers.
We were busy for the next few hours. It slowed a little as people left for lunch, giving me time to restock shelves.
I had just finished when Nate’s widow, Becca, showed up at the store.
I hadn’t talked with her since our awkward conversation about her new relationship.
“Hey, Becca.” I gave her a quick hug. “You okay?” I stood back to take her in, noting how good she looked. She’d gained some weight in the right places. Her cheeks were full again. Shine had returned to her blonde hair. She’d gotten so thin after Nate’s death that I’d worried about her health.
“I’m fine. I should have called first, but I was in the neighborhood.”
“I’m always glad to see you,” I said.
Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed Annie watching us. I motioned for her to come over so I could introduce them.
“Becca, this is Annie. My new summer employee. And Annie, this is Becca.”
“I was married to Nate, Dorian’s best friend,” Becca said as if anyone had asked.
“It’s nice to meet you,” Annie said, a glimmer of relief in her eyes. Had she wondered who this pretty blonde woman was to me? “I’m sorry about Nate. I lost my dad. Same way.”
“Ah, honey, I’m sorry to hear that,” Becca said. “Sadly, I’m sure you and my girls would have a lot to talk about.”
Another customer came in and Annie excused herself to offer assistance.
I gestured toward the office. “Come on back to my office.”
Once there, I closed the door so we could speak in private. “Have a seat,” I said, sitting behind the desk. “How are you? I’ve been meaning to call.”
“I know it was kind of weird last time we talked,” Becca said.
“It was my fault.”
“I took you by surprise.”
“You did, yeah. But I should have been more encouraging,” I said.
“You loved Nate. I imagine it’s hard to see me moving on.”
I nodded, unable to speak for a moment. “I remember when you two met. And when the girls were born. It’s hard to think of you with anyone else.”
“He’s gone and he’s not coming back.”
“I know.”
“You still going to the support group?” Becca asked.
“Yeah, you?” She attended one in Cliffside Bay, a town just north of here.
“No, I was ready to stop. I got what I needed.”
“Good.”
“Listen, I wanted to talk to you in person instead of over the phone about something important.”
“Go ahead. I’ll try and be more gracious.” I braced myself though, knowing what she was going to say.
“I’m getting married.”
There it was. I drew in a deep breath. “Congratulations.”
“Thanks. You almost sound like you mean it.”
“I do.”
“I want you to meet him,” Becca said. “And I want you to come to the wedding.”
“I was at the first one, so why not?” I blurted out before I could think better of it.
I cringed as a wave of pain crossed her face.
“I’m sorry,” I said quickly. “That’s not what I meant.”
“It’s okay. I understand.”
“How are the girls taking it?”
“Maria’s all in. She was little when Nate died, and he’d been away for so much of her life.
I’m not sure how much she even remembers him.
She adores Mark. They’re tight already. But Luci’s struggling.
Her face looks like yours does right now pretty much all the time—like she’s trying to be happy for me but she can’t fully because she loved her dad so much. ”
“It’s dumb, but I never thought about you remarrying. I don’t know why. It was just always Nate and Becca, you know?”
“I know more than anyone,” Becca said softly. “I never thought I’d fall in love with anyone again. But Mark’s special.” She went on to tell me how they’d met through mutual friends. “At a Christmas party I didn’t even want to go to. He’s a marine biologist. Specializes in dolphins.”
“Who wouldn’t like a guy who studies dolphins?” I asked lightly. Inside, however, my chest had tightened to the point of finding it hard to speak.
“He has a beautiful home in Cliffside Bay.”
“No kids?” I asked.
“No, but an ex-wife. He hasn’t spoken to her in years though, so it’s nothing to worry about. And he’s really good to the girls, even when Luci’s rude.”
“When’s the wedding?”
“In two weeks,” Becca said. “We’re going to do it at his house.
He lives on the cliff, looking out to sea.
It’s beautiful. We’ll be moving in with him, so I have the house up for sale.
He wants me to be able to stay home with the girls if I want, so I’m thinking about leaving my job once we get married. ”
Becca had been working as an elementary school aid since Nate died. She said she needed the money, despite Nate’s pension, but I suspected she wanted ways to fill her days when the girls were at school.
I thought about the small house Nate had found for them after he left the Navy. He’d acted proud, but later I wondered if it had felt like a burden. Like a noose around his neck.
“There’s more,” Becca said. “I was wondering if you’d give me away. You know my dad’s gone and I have no brothers. You’re the closest thing I have to one, and I’d really like it to be you.”
“You … want me … to give you away?”
“Only if you’re comfortable.” She paled slightly, and I noticed a tremble in her hands. “You know what, never mind. Forget I asked.”
“No, it’s okay. I’m sorry. I’m just surprised. Yes, of course I’ll give you away. I’m honored.” I was, but I was also sick at the thought of giving Nate’s wife away to someone new. It felt wrong. But I couldn’t say any of that.
“Are you sure?” Becca asked.
“Positive. Just let me know what I should wear, and when I should be there.”
“Oh, this means so much to me.” Her eyes filled. “Thank you. I just couldn’t imagine it being anyone else but you.”
“Like I said, it will be my honor.”
She peered at me for a moment. “How are you? Something’s different about you.”
“No, I don’t think so.”
“Tell me the truth,” Becca said.
I opened my mouth to tell her about Delphine but the words wouldn’t come. I wasn’t sure why, other than I felt like a big fat hypocrite.
“I’m moving forward,” I said, purposely keeping it vague.
“You know I’m here if you ever need to talk.”
“I do know and thank you.”
She stood. “I should run. I have a dress fitting in an hour.”
I came around the desk to give her a hug. “I’ll see you in two weeks.”
She hugged me back. “Thank you, Dorian. I mean it.”
I walked her out to the front. Soon, she was on her way. To her wedding dress fitting. A dress she would wear to marry someone who wasn’t my best friend.
I returned to the desk to help Annie ring up customers, telling myself it would all be fine. It wasn’t like it was my life anyway. Becca deserved to be happy, and I wasn’t going to stand in her way.
Why, then, did I feel so bad?
The rest of the morning was uneventful, other than a busload of septuagenarians and octogenarians from a retirement community all coming in to the store at the same time.
They mostly browsed, but several bought books.
Annie convinced two of the women to try Seraphina’s new series and even told them to come to the book signing if they could.
One woman remembered my mother and asked after her. I had to break it to her that she’d passed away.
“Oh, that’s a shame,” she said. “But wouldn’t she be proud to see you carrying on the family tradition.”
After they headed out, bound for the ice cream shop, Annie and I let out sighs of relief.
“I never saw so many old people all at the same time before,” Annie said. “They were a handful.”
I chuckled at her old-fashioned description. “An hour with the elderly and you’re starting to sound like one.”
“I’m an old lady inside,” Annie said. “Just ask my mom.”
Since there was a lull in customers, we started straightening the display tables. Our elderly couples had made a mess of things.
“Becca seems nice,” Annie said.
“Without fail.”
She looked across the table at me, concern in her eyes. “Is everything okay? You were in such a good mood earlier.”
“Yes, it’s fine.” I moved a book from the wrong stack to the right one. “Becca came by to tell me she’s getting married. In two weeks.”
“Oh. How does that feel?”
“Strange. Hard. She asked if I’d give her away.”
“Yikes! Okay, nothing loaded there, right?” Annie asked.
“Right.”
“Did you agree?”
“I did. What else could I do? But she met him like six months ago too. I’m worried about her and her girls. However, it’s none of my business.”
“But it still hurts.”
“Kinda, yeah. Which is ridiculous. Nate’s gone. She can’t wait forever.”
“You can know something in your head and not your heart.”
A customer came in then and Annie went to greet them. I returned to the desk. A sudden urge to text Delphine washed over me.
Dorian
Hey! Hope you’re having a good day. Thinking about you.
Delphine
Good day so far. Thinking about you too.
Dorian
Do you want to get together tonight? We could make dinner together. With Annie too.
Delphine
That sounds wonderful. Your house?
Dorian
Works for me. I can bring Annie straight from work and meet you there? We’ll stop at the store for supplies.
Delphine
You make this too easy.
Dorian
Make what too easy?
Delphine
Everything.
Dorian
I’m glad.
Delphine
See you around seven?
Dorian
Can’t wait.
I put the phone aside to ring up a customer buying a parenting book.
I should feel happy, I told myself. Delphine Delacroix would be in my house later.
I had a lot to look forward to. My mother used to say it was a choice to be happy.
She was right, even if it took a little white-knuckling from time to time.