Chapter 20 Elias
ELIAS
All focus should be on Indian Wells this weekend. And what am I sitting in bed researching? ‘Delayed gratification’ and ‘cockwarming.’
When Ben came over after the Harvard match, we did much of the same, and it was clearly not a one-time thing—all that ‘stay inside me and don’t move until I beg you to.
’ I haven’t figured out if it’s a delayed gratification thing, the sensation of me being still, him being full, or all of the above.
I’ve never been with someone who liked this stuff before, and I’m surprised by how into it I am. Every other guy I’ve slept with has wanted it fast and a little rough. Definitely no delayed gratification.
There’s something so intimate about just being inside someone, watching them lose it under you, and being completely still. I get it. But I’m not an expert, and the competitive bastard in me wants to be the champion of delayed gratification/cockwarming.
My research on cockwarming is a little confusing and contradictory.
I only do a surface search. It’s not exactly something I want to go too deep into the rabbit hole with on the shared Wi-Fi.
In a nutshell, it’s possible that Ben is into that, though I don’t think I have enough primary evidence just yet to make any solid conclusions.
I would ask Ben what it is about me being still inside him that he likes, but I don’t want to push him back into shyness. He opens up more easily when we’re doing the thing and then he gets bossy. So I should just let him tell me in his own time.
The delayed gratification thing makes a lot of sense. When we do it as a prelude to fucking, that’s what we’re doing, we’re delaying a promised moment of gratification.
I get hard just thinking about it. Who would have thought Ben Harris would push me to learn new things?
One thing I know without having to Google it is that I cannot get enough of hooking up with him.
I can’t wait for him to come over again so I can practice some of the things I’ve learned, but my heart drops into my stomach when he tells me he has a paper due.
Can you write it over here?
Desperate, I know.
Those little dots appear to tell me he’s typing something … then disappear. Watching flashing dots appear and disappear will be known to future generations as what thumb screws and the rack were to the medieval people.
I don’t think I’d get much done.
I hold back a groan before typing:
I promise I will make sure you finish your paper.
An idea pops into my head and all the blood rushes south.
And I’ll make it way more enjoyable.
I wait while he types and deletes some more. Ideas surfacing now that make me grin. I hope this isn’t a bad idea. I really don’t want to get in the way of his studies, but I think this might work.
Okay. But if I can’t get it done, I’ll have to go home.
Deal.
While he’s on his way over, I rush around my room, throwing dirty socks and underpants in the laundry hamper, making the bed.
I rush into the living room and find Chad and Jesse glued to another ‘shoot ‘em up’ video game.
Pizza boxes are strewn all over the coffee table and sweaty tennis shoes lay in a pile by the door.
“Come on guys, can’t we tidy up a little in here? Don’t you ever have any girls over?”
They both look at me with vacant stares and I remember them asking me for pictures of sorority girls. I guess the answer to that is no.
“Hey, is that guy coming over again?” Jesse asks.
“Yes, why?”
Chad elbows him in the ribs and Jesse shakes his head. “No reason … hey, I think we’re gonna go out for ice cream. You guys want anything?”
“No.” Good, if they go out now I can tidy some of this mess up so Ben doesn’t think I’m a slob.
Ben arrives as I’m trying to shove two pizza boxes down the shoot they use as a bin here.
My heart’s racing as I invite him up, apologizing the second he steps inside. I swear he wrinkles his nose.
“If it smells like sweaty shoes in here, it’s my roommates, not me.”
He laughs. “I live in a frat house with a ton of guys. Some of the freshmen haven’t perfected their hygiene routines yet. Don’t worry.”
Fuck, he’s so nice.
“So....”
He pats his laptop bag, a backpack slung over his shoulders looks heavy with books.
“Your paper, right … let’s go in my room, the desk is clear. You should be able to work in there.”
I’m starting to have second thoughts about my idea. This sweet guy just wanted to get his paper done and I have all sorts of sexy plans for him.
While he gets set up at the desk, I close the blinds and watch him from the bed.
“What are you going to do while I work?”
“Ben, I have an idea. You might not go for it, and it’s fine if you don’t … I just thought you might like it.”
He chews his bottom lip before nodding.
“Would you like me to be inside you while you work?”
His eyebrows shoot up, cheeks flushed. Is that good or bad?
“I … don’t know if I’d be able to concentrate.”
“That’s fine, it was just an idea, I—”
“Maybe we could give it a try?”
Everything in me soars. I try to tamper down my excitement, just in case he wants to change his mind.
“Sure.”
“So … how do we do this?”
I take a seat in the desk chair and open my pants.
“There’s lube and condoms in the drawer beside my bed.”
Ben nods and grabs the supplies. I’m already hard enough to put the condom on. Once I’m suited up, I squeeze some lube out onto my hand and start stroking myself, but Ben stops me.
“Let me.”
He climbs into my lap and takes over, his breath minty, like he brushed his teeth before coming over here. It gives me a rush to think he did that for me.
I lean close enough to kiss him as his hand slides over my cock.
Ben’s hand feels so good my eyes roll. It’s not even that Ben is some sort of hand job expert or has a special technique. Just that I want him, and I’m beyond excited to try this thing I’ve been thinking about all day.
“I’m ready, are you?”
He nods. Those big brown eyes make me melt. I get the feeling he’s waiting for my instruction. So he can be bossy, but he likes to give up control sometimes? I can definitely work with that.
“Turn around.” I keep my voice gentle and he obliges without hesitation. I make him wait before giving my next instruction.
“Pull your pants down enough to sit on my cock.”
He lets out a little gasp and my hips try to buck off the chair.
Cool it, I remind myself. You’ll need a lot more patience than that if this is going to work.
When Ben drops his trousers and pushes his underwear down to his knees, I’m treated to the sight of that gorgeous ass and can’t wait to get my hands on it.
“Hold onto the desk.”
He does as I say. I scoot closer, the wheels on the chair helping me to slide in effortlessly.
I’m too tall to lick him from this angle, so I use my fingers to open him up, enjoying the sight of him squirming and the sounds of his moans as his knuckles get white holding onto the desk.
I can’t resist. I have to sink to my knees and taste him. His legs shake while I hold him in place.
“Are you ready?”
He’s breathless when he replies with a shaky, “Yes.”
I slide back up onto the chair and guide him into my lap.
His thighs are strong enough from all the training to keep him hovering steadily in place as I line myself up.
He starts to sink down while I guide him.
I can tell he’s biting his lip from the way his moans sound.
Once I’m halfway in, I can stop guiding him and use one hand to stroke his back.
I know he likes it when I touch him like that.
He sinks all the way down and lets his head fall back on my shoulder. His neck is right there so I kiss it. He sighs, hums. Knowing he won’t be moving for a long time is weirdly comforting.
“Okay?” I whisper in his ear.
“Mmm, this is perfect.”
Yes, I was right.
“Now, do you think you can write your paper?”
He lets out a breathy laugh. “I don’t know. I guess we’ll see.”
“Okay, get to work.” I try to sound authoritative, but there’s a smile in my voice. I love seeing him like this. His inhibitions thrown to the wind and a sexy flush on his cheeks because I’m filling him up.
We have to wheel ourselves a little closer to the desk. Even this small movement sends thrills through me, and I can tell it affects Ben too. He bites his lip and wriggles in my lap.
“Hey.” I grip his hips … tight. “No moving, remember?”
“Mm,” he hums, closing his eyes and letting his head fall back again.
I give him this moment to adjust and enjoy the sensation. Stroking a hand over his smooth throat.
“You look so good right now.”
“Everything you say in that accent sounds sexy.”
I laugh. “No one finds the German accent sexy.”
“They must be crazy.”
“Get to work.” I manage a more authoritative tone this time and am rewarded with a filthy moan.
He flips his laptop open and logs in. I hadn’t considered the fact I’d be watching him type out his password, open up his word document and research tabs. It makes the moment even more intimate.
At first, he opens his word document with about five hundred words already typed out and just sits there staring at it. The cursor flashing as his fingers pause over the keyboard.
He’s breathing so hard he clenches slightly around my cock and I have to bite my lip to hold in a moan.
I’m supposed to be still. Silent. It’s hell not being able to touch him except to hold his hips still.
Not being able to kiss the back of his neck now we’ve started the game.
I’m sure I can hear him wriggling his toes in his socks under the desk.
I think he’s about to tell me he can’t do it. That we need to have sex before he can focus. Or he needs to leave and go back to the frat house.
But then he starts to type.
Hesitant at first. And then with a steady rhythm. Only stopping to consult something in an open tab every now and then.