19 Tears And Kisses
E dward was in sombre mood that evening, dressing for dinner in silence, and steeling himself for the inevitable questions in the drawing room. No one in the earl’s household would be so crass as to say, ‘What are you up to, Lord Tarvin?’ or to ask when he might be leaving again — that question would come later, perhaps. But they would wonder, all the same, and he would be obliged to offer some explanation. Releasing Tom Shapman from prison was one thing, a mere charitable gesture, but arranging his marriage? Obtaining a licence, fixing a time with the parson and the families, ferrying people back and forth? The marriage of a woodworker and a poultry maid was not something with which a baron would normally concern himself.
Perhaps the time for secrecy was past. He had already hinted to Lady Alice that he had an interest in marrying Tess, but it could be useful to him now to be more open, and declare his intentions publicly. It was unorthodox, for Tess was officially engaged, but he would be a far more acceptable suitor than Ulric. If he could win Lady Alice’s approval, they could be married at once, and able to secure Tess’s fortune for her. If there were any fortune left to secure, that is to say.
The drawing room was already full when he entered it, and for a moment he panicked, recognising no one. Who were all these people? But then the earl loomed out of the crowd.
“Tarvin! There you are! Come and meet a few people. Let me see, you will not remember the Cathcarts, I expect.”
Edward let himself be herded around the room, smiling and making the polite noises expected of him, but all the time he was looking for a diminutive figure in black. Dinner was announced and there was a general movement towards the dining room before it dawned on him that Tess was not there at all. Shapman’s marriage had hit her hard, then. He had another burst of panic — had she run away? She was good at that.
He allowed himself to be seated beside Lady Alice once more, on her left hand this time, with one of the multitude of Cathcarts in the place of honour on her right. As the rest of the guests chose seats and settled themselves, he murmured in a low voice, “Is Miss Nicholson not joining us tonight, Lady Alice?”
“Is she not here?” she said. “One never knows what is going on with Tess, but if she had other plans for the evening, she has not intimated them to me.”
Mr Cathcart helped Lady Alice to several of the dishes laid out on the table, and then the two were engaged in conversation for several minutes. Edward attempted to talk to the young lady seated beside him, but she was monosyllabic and in the unquietness of his mind, conversation was too much effort and he fell silent, waiting for Lady Alice to turn her attention to him.
As soon as the opportunity arose, he said quickly, “Lady Alice, have you talked to Miss Nicholson at all today?”
“I have not,” she said, “but that is by no means unusual. Are you concerned about her, Lord Tarvin? She has her maid and footman to watch over her, you know.”
Edward knew perfectly well that Tess was easily able to evade her watchdogs whenever she wished, but that was not something her mother would wish to hear. Instead, he said, “I am a little concerned, it is true. Her friend Tom Shapman was married this morning to a poultry maid from Gowland’s Farm, and she was a little upset to discover it.”
“Married, is he? And to a poultry maid? I am very glad to hear it, since he will pester Tess no more, but I do not know why she should be upset about it. That business was scotched by my husband last year, and now she is betrothed to a much more suitable man.”
It was the opening Edward had hoped for. “I would not entirely agree that my cousin Ulric is more suitable. More fitting than a woodworker, certainly, for he is a gentleman and has an income sufficient to support a wife, but…”
“But , Lord Tarvin? You know of some flaw in his character, perhaps? You must know him well, and I would much sooner know the truth than to be left guessing. One hears… rumours, and I notice you have not expressed the flattering remarks usual in such circumstances — that he is the best of good fellows, a man of respectability who will make any woman an excellent husband. That is what I expected to hear from you, Lord Tarvin, and yet I did not. I conclude, therefore, that you dislike him.”
“No, indeed, I like him very well, but he is not a man who should ever marry. That is my considered opinion, Lady Alice.”
She raised her eyebrows a delicate fraction at this robust statement. “Oh. Then I must presume that he is a man of vicious habits.”
“Not that, no. Let me be very blunt — my cousin is simple-minded. He is happy enough if he has horses to ride and to care for, but he has not the intellect for family life. He has been cozened into this betrothal by his mother and Miss Nicholson.”
“Why?” she said sharply. “If he is all that you describe him, why would they wish him to marry?”
“When Ulric marries, he regains control of his estate, which his mother desires greatly. Miss Nicholson, of course, obtains control of her fortune, for although it would in law belong to her husband, he would easily be persuaded to cede control to her. As one of Ulric’s trustees, you will appreciate that I am doing all in my power to prevent this marriage from ever taking place. I have already taken the woodworker out of contention by arranging his marriage, and—”
“You did that?”
“I did, and I hope to intervene with Ulric, too, but that is… more difficult to predict.”
“Is your cousin’s welfare your sole objective, Lord Tarvin?” she said, with such a sweet smile that he could not take offence. “Or do you have some other plan in mind for my daughter?”
That, too, was an opening. There was no point dancing around the question, not any more. “I hope to marry her myself, Lady Alice.”
“Ah,” was all she said, and began enquiring about Edward’s estates, very much a mother with an eye on her daughter’s marriage prospects.
Edward was quietly pleased. Lady Alice’s approval would not weigh with Tess, naturally, who would always go her own way, but it could do no harm.
When the ladies withdrew, Edward made a point of asking if any of the gentlemen had seen Tess that day.
“She came to see me this afternoon,” Lord Rennington said. “We had a pleasant little chat. She is to write to Lady Rennington to tell her about her betrothal.”
“Is that what she wanted to talk to you about?” Edward said, puzzled.
“Oh, no. She wanted money for her wedding clothes, but it is a little premature for that. Frankly, I am not sure she will stick with your cousin, Tarvin. Is he much smitten with her? She can be a taking little thing when she sets her mind to it, but lately I cannot tell what is in her head, not at all. First, this Shapman fellow, who is not at all suitable, and now this man at Durham, which is a very sudden start and I have a feeling her heart is not engaged as it should be. Will he be much upset if she bolts, do you think?”
“I imagine he would bear up nobly under the loss,” Edward said carefully.
“Of course, of course. What gentleman would not? But she can be flighty, very flighty, I fear. You might perhaps put it to him that… she has something of a reputation for changing her mind. I would put it no stronger than that, for she is very young… very innocent, naturally. And her mother being so… well, not able to supervise her as a mother should, perhaps. She has had a little too much freedom. Nothing that marriage to the right man would not knock out of her, but still, she is a little flighty yet.”
Edward was offended on Tess’s behalf at so cavalier a disregard of her concerns. “I think she knows precisely what she wants,” he said with some heat, “but she is not yet certain of the best way to achieve it.”
“She wants marriage, of course,” the earl said dismissively. “What woman does not? All she needs to do is settle on the man — an eligible man, naturally, not Shapman. Not suitable at all. Strong, are you shooting tomorrow? How is your new gamekeeper settling in?”
Edward was too restless to enter into a discussion of game birds and the prospects for good sport, so he quietly slipped away to the great hall, where Wellum, the under butler, was loitering, directing footmen into the dining room or drawing room, as required.
“Do you know where Miss Nicholson is?” Edward said. “She did not come in to dinner.”
He looked startled. “No, my lord. Is she in the castle? There were no instructions to the kitchen for a tray to her room, or anything of that nature. We assumed she had gone out for the evening.”
“Was the carriage ordered?”
“No, my lord.”
“She would hardly go out to an evening engagement on foot, would she?”
“No, my lord.”
“Then find her maid and footman, and see what they have to say about it.”
“Yes, my lord.”
“At once!”
“Yes, my lord!”
He dispatched two footmen to the nether regions to find the two servants, while Edward paced impatiently back and forth.
Captain Edgerton emerged from the dining room and crossed the great hall to intercept Edward. “Are you concerned about Miss Nicholson, too, Lord Tarvin?”
“I am. She was distressed when she discovered that Shapman had married, and it would reassure me to know that she is not still suffering on that account. She is usually very good at shrugging off disappointments.”
“Indeed. Is she still about the castle somewhere? Although it is a very large castle, and she is a small person, well able to hide herself away if she wishes it.”
“I have sent for her maid and footman, and if they assure me that she is still within the confines of the building, then I shall start at the attics and work my way down until I find her.”
Eventually, the maid and footman were tracked down, but both were confident that Tess was within the castle.
“She’s not in her room and she’s not asked for any food, but all her outdoor clothes are still here,” the maid said.
“Even the old cloak she keeps by the garden door,” the footman said.
“Where might she be?” Edward said, but neither had any idea. When they had been dismissed, he went on, “Well, then. The attics first. Then the bedrooms.”
“If I might suggest,” Edgerton said quietly, “there is a place she might be.” He pointed to a small balcony overlooking the great hall. “She has been known to hide there.”
“We would see her, surely.”
“In a black gown? At this time of night, the light is so poor that if she sits below the rail and keeps still, she would be invisible. It would be worth a try, anyway. I shall wait here. If she is not there, wave down to me and I will help you search the rest of the castle.”
Edward nodded and made his way up the stairs. The balcony was not hard to find, once one knew of its existence, hidden by an innocuous velvet curtain. Flicking that aside, Edward stepping into the dark space beyond. Very little light penetrated, for the great hall’s chandelier hung below the level of the balcony, and the glass roof above was dark at this hour.
She was there. At first, it was a muffled sob which gave her away but as Edward’s eyes adjusted to the darkness, he made out her outline sitting on the floor, her knees drawn up and her face buried in the folds of her skirt. In one hand she held a tiny square of lace, with which she dabbed ineffectually at her tear-stained cheeks now and then.
“Ah, Tess,” he murmured, settling on the floor beside her and reaching one arm around her shoulders. “My poor darling. He is not worth so many tears, I assure you.”
Her head shot up. “Tom? That is not it.”
“Then what?” What else had happened that day? “You wanted money for wedding clothes? I can give you money for clothes if—”
“I want my money, Edward! Mine! The money my father left me, and now it will all go to him , to my uncle, who has more money than he knows what to do with already, and I shall have nothing at all. It is so unfair!”
“Why do you think it will go to the earl?” he said cautiously.
“I heard you talking, you and Captain Edgerton and the lawyer from London. My father stole it all, filched the tenants’ rent money and bought those gold bars, so it has to go back to my uncle, and I know it is the law, I understand that, but it is so hard! I hoped to get my hands on it before anyone realised anything about it. But that lawyer is too thorough. He asks too many questions.”
“So you knew? That your father was embezzling from the late earl’s estate?”
“I knew he was up to something, and guessed the nature of it. So much money, and it should have been mine. He intended it to be mine, and now I shall be penniless.”
That brought another flood of tears. Silently, Edward handed her a handkerchief.
“I have one,” she sobbed, waving the scrap of lace.
He laughed. “That little thing is useless for a real crying session. You need a man’s handkerchief for so many tears.”
That brought a wan smile to her face, as she accepted the offered handkerchief. “At least Ulric is safe from me now. There is no point in marrying if I have no dowry.”
“Oh Tess, I am so sorry,” he said. “I never wanted you to marry Ulric, but I truly wanted… I still want you to have your fortune. At the risk of being boringly repetitive, would this be an appropriate moment to remind you that you can still marry me? I would give you your fifty thousand pounds, free of all conditions, so you could do as you pleased.”
“But it would still be yours . You could change your mind at any time, and I would have no freedom with a string of babies to tie me down.”
“Well, a trust fund for the money, then, and a marriage of convenience, so no babies. Would that be acceptable?” He despised himself for the pleading tone in his voice, but surely she would marry him now? What alternative had she?
She turned her tear-streaked face to look at him. “You still want to marry me, even though I have nothing?”
“Dearest, I have never cared a straw for your fortune, except that it was of interest to you. I have a large fortune of my own, as it happens, which I should be delighted to share with you.”
“Would you do that for me? Why?”
“Because I love you, Tess. Surely you know that now. I want you beside me for the rest of my life.”
“But I do not love you. I could never love you.”
Oh, if she only knew the pain her words gave him! “I do not ask for love,” he said with what dignity he could muster. “Am I truly so unpalatable to you, Tess?”
“You are stuffy, like all men of your rank… like the earl, denying me even a thousand pounds of my own money. So patronising! He barely even listened to me.”
“Is there nothing about me that you like?” he said in desperation.
She whipped round to face him, mischief written on her face. “Why, yes! I like the way you kiss me.”
And to his delight and astonishment, she curled up against his chest and pulled his head towards her.
Edward melted. She was a minx, of course, and should have been reined in years ago, but he adored her waywardness with all his being. At first, he simply allowed her to have her way, her lips, salty with tears, warming him and sending hope fizzing through him. She could think him as stuffy as much as she liked if she would only kiss him like this more often. But gradually, when she made no move to break away from him, he could not help himself from responding to her with more passion. And she matched him every step of the way, until he was dizzy and shaking with the multitude of nameless emotions roiling through him.
When eventually she pushed him away, laughing, he gasped at the sudden change, like a drowning man suddenly reaching the air at the surface.
“That was fun!” she said happily.
Fun! That was not the word he would have used. Incredible, perhaps. Exhilarating. Magical. Good Lord, mere fun did not begin to describe it.
Breathlessly, he said, “Well, you can forget the marriage of convenience. If you are going to kiss me like that, there is no way I shall be able to keep my hands off you.”
She beamed at him. “Now that is better than Tom. He tells me it is most improper when we kiss, and there can never be anything between us. Or he used to,” she added sadly.
Edward almost pushed her away in disgust. “I wish you would not compare me with Tom Shapman. It is most unhandsome of you.”
“Jealous, are you?”
“I am not jealous of a common labourer, Tess.”
“He is not a common labourer, he is a skilled craftsman, an artisan, someone to be respected, as he respected me.”
“Tom Shapman is a working man who respected you because you are the niece of an earl. If you had ever had the misfortune to become his wife, you would have found out just how much he respected you. As his wife, he would have owned you, body and soul, and you would have had to do whatever he wanted. Not much freedom in that, is there?”
“If I had had my money—”
“He would have owned that, too. Tess, the only man who will treat a lady with the respect due to her rank is a gentleman . No working man, however worthy, can truly appreciate the world you inhabit, the restrictions society places on you. Your father understood that, and it is time you did, too.”
She jumped to her feet, obliging him to stand, too. “Go away, Edward! Go back to London or wherever you were, and stop meddling in my life. What you need to understand is that my life is my own, and I will not be pushed around by you or anyone else. You are just like my uncle — you think all I need is a suitable husband, and suddenly everything will be wonderful. Well, it will not. If I cannot have my own money, then I shall not marry at all, and certainly not you!”
With a swirl of her black skirts, she was gone, leaving Edward torn between anger and despair.