5. Summer
5
SUMMER
I stared at the invoice in my trembling hands, my stomach sinking further with every line I read. The numbers blurred together, but the total at the bottom glared at me like a neon sign.
$18,750.
That was just the estimate for Ava’s surgery—not counting the follow-up appointments, therapy, or any potential complications. I’d known this wouldn’t be cheap, but seeing it in black and white made it all too real.
“Mommy, look!”
Ava’s cheerful voice pulled me out of my spiral. She was sitting on the living room floor, her knee propped up on a cushion while she built a tower with her wooden blocks. She’d been obsessed with them lately, creating castles, bridges, and entire cities.
“That’s amazing, sweetheart,” I said, forcing a smile as I set the invoice on the counter, out of her view.
“It’s a dragon castle,” she explained, holding up one of her toy figures. “This is the dragon who guards the treasure. He’s nice, though. He lets the princess visit the treasure whenever she wants.”
“That’s very kind of him,” I said, crouching beside her. I kissed the top of her head, inhaling the faint scent of baby shampoo. “You’re so creative, Ava.”
She beamed at me, her blue eyes sparkling, and my heart twisted painfully. She didn’t deserve any of this—the hospital visits, the surgery, the financial stress that was threatening to crush me. All she knew was that she had a “boo-boo” that Dr. Pearson was going to fix.
Dr. Pearson.
The thought of Enzo brought another wave of unease. He’d been asking too many questions lately, questions I wasn’t ready to answer. And now, with this enormous bill looming over me, I couldn’t help but wonder if I was making the right choice by keeping him in the dark.
“Mommy, are you okay?” Ava’s small hand rested on my arm, her face filled with concern.
I swallowed hard and nodded. “I’m fine, baby. Just thinking about grown-up stuff.”
“Like what?”
“Like how much I love you,” I said, tickling her gently until she giggled.
Her laughter eased some of the tension in my chest, but it didn’t solve anything. I couldn’t let her see me fall apart.
Later that evening, after Ava was asleep, I sat at the kitchen table with my laptop, staring at the hospital invoice again. I’d already checked my savings account, and it wasn’t anywhere near enough.
My job as a freelance graphic designer paid the bills, but barely. I’d been trying to pick up extra work, but clients weren’t exactly lining up to hire me.
I could apply for financial aid through the hospital, but that would take time, and Ava’s surgery couldn’t wait.
The other option was asking Enzo for help.
I buried my face in my hands, groaning softly. The idea made my stomach churn. He was already suspicious—if I asked him to cover the costs, it would only give him more reason to dig into our past.
But what other choice did I have?
The next day, I found myself back at the hospital with Ava for another pre-op checkup. She was chatting happily with one of the nurses while I stood by the reception desk, trying to muster the courage to bring up the financial situation.
I hadn’t seen Enzo yet, and part of me was grateful. The other part was dreading the moment he inevitably showed up.
“Summer,” a familiar voice said behind me, and I stiffened.
Turning, I saw Enzo approaching, his expression warm but tinged with concern. “How’s Ava doing today?”
“She’s fine,” I said quickly, glancing over at her. “She’s been excited about the surgery, actually. She keeps calling it her ‘super fix.’”
He smiled, his gaze softening. “She’s a brave kid.”
“She is,” I said, my throat tightening.
Enzo motioned for me to step aside, away from the busy reception area. “I wanted to go over a few things with you,” he said. “Nothing major, just some details about the surgery and what to expect afterward.”
“Of course,” I said, following him into a small consultation room.
As he pulled up Ava’s file on his tablet, I found myself studying him—the way his dark hair curled slightly at the ends, the way his brow furrowed in concentration. He’d always had this way of commanding attention without trying, and it annoyed me that it still worked on me.
“Here we go,” he said, turning the tablet toward me. “This is a breakdown of what the surgery will entail, including the recovery timeline and follow-up care.”
I nodded, trying to focus on his words instead of the way my heart was racing.
“And this,” he continued, scrolling to another page, “is the estimate for the surgery costs. I know it’s a lot, but there are payment plans and financial aid options available.”
My stomach dropped as he said the words. He knew. He could see it in my face—the panic, the helplessness.
“Summer,” he said gently, leaning forward, “are you okay? You seem… distracted.”
“I’m fine,” I said quickly, though my voice wavered.
“You don’t have to do this alone, you know,” he said, his tone soft but firm.
I looked down at my hands, twisting my fingers together. “I’m her mom. It’s my responsibility.”
“Her dad would say the same thing,” he said quietly.
My head snapped up, and our eyes met. For a moment, neither of us spoke.
“What are you trying to say?” I asked, my voice barely above a whisper.
“I’m saying that if Ava’s dad knew what was going on, he’d want to help,” Enzo said, his gaze steady. “And if there’s a reason he’s not in the picture, then maybe it’s time to reevaluate that.”
My chest tightened, and I shook my head. “You don’t understand.”
“Then help me understand,” he said, his voice firm but not unkind.
I opened my mouth to respond, but the words wouldn’t come. How could I explain everything—why I’d kept Ava a secret, why I’d never told him?
“I just… I need time,” I said finally, standing up abruptly.
“Summer—”
“I appreciate everything you’re doing for Ava,” I said, cutting him off. “But I can handle this.”
He sighed, leaning back in his chair. “If you change your mind, you know where to find me.”
I nodded, then left the room before he could say anything else.
Back at home, I sat on the couch with my laptop again, staring at the invoice. My mind was a storm of emotions—guilt, fear, frustration.
I’d always told myself I was doing the right thing by keeping Enzo out of Ava’s life. But now, as the weight of everything pressed down on me, I couldn’t help but wonder if I’d made the wrong choice.
“Mommy?”
I looked up to see Ava standing in the doorway, clutching Bunny. “What’s wrong?” she asked, her little brow furrowed.
“Nothing, baby,” I said quickly, forcing a smile. “I’m just tired.”
She climbed onto the couch beside me, snuggling into my side. “Bunny says you should take a nap.”
I laughed softly, wrapping my arm around her. “Maybe Bunny’s right.”
But as I held her close, I knew I wouldn’t be able to rest until I figured this out. For Ava’s sake, I had to.