Chapter 13 #2
He nodded us forward, so I sat, leaving room for him to sit between Jessica and me.
Awkward.
My darling class put on little red noses and sang Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. They did their hand actions perfectly, and I almost teared up. Then they started a song about snow and snowflakes.
Danny frequently looked in our direction, probably at Adam to make sure he was watching, and every time Danny waved, Adam waved right back. They finished with Frosty, including the clapping/stomping part that was Danny’s favorite.
I loved being a teacher. It was seriously amazing.
My class sat, and my heart warmed in my chest as I stared at their cute faces. Jessica’s class stood, and Adam leaned closer to me. I smelled citrus and spice and felt his warm breath on my neck.
“Thanks for getting me today, and sorry Danny was difficult.”
I turned so I could look him in the eyes. His face was inches from mine. I tried to swallow. “Danny is okay. He just got overwhelmed when he didn’t have his Santa hat and had a hard time shifting focus.”
Adam rolled his eyes. “That kid is so stubborn.” He ran a hand through his hair. “I don’t know what I’m supposed to do.”
Do I bring up testing again?
Will he get mad?
I sat in silence.
He tilted his head and looked at me. “You can say it. I’m a mess. I have no idea how to parent, and it’s all my fault.”
I leaned back in surprise. “Wow, that’s a lot of loaded language. Adam, you’re doing great. Trust me. You care way more than my parents ever did.”
His eyes held questions I could tell he wanted to ask.
I didn’t want to talk about myself, so I guess I’m going to bring up testing. “Do you remember the first meeting I set up?”
Adam raised his right eyebrow. “The one where you made me sit in that tiny chair and I threw a tantrum?”
I blushed. “To be fair, there was an adult chair too, I just got too nervous to say anything once you sat.” I shrugged, I’d opened the conversation, and now I would not push it. Adam’s eyes went wide and then he laughed.
“Shhh!” Jessica leaned forward and glared in our direction.
I flinched and mouthed sorry as I shifted back in my seat and returned my focus to the stage.
“Are you sure being neurodivergent doesn’t just mean you had bad parents?” Adam continued.
Didn’t he see Jessica’s death glare, or did he not care?
I rolled my eyes. “It for sure doesn’t mean that.
It isn’t something anyone did wrong. They aren’t bad or wrong either.
” My brow furrowed as I tried to think of how to describe it.
“It’s maybe like basketball versus football.
They are both sports, but different. One isn’t better than the other, but they focus on and practice different things… but both are good?”
His eyebrows raised, and he smirked. “Did you just give me a sports analogy?”
I chuckled. “Well, I tried to anyway, with my very limited sports knowledge. Did it work?”
He folded his arms across his chest. “I think so,” he whispered, and his arm brushed against mine, and I held my breath.
I nodded. “Let me know if there is anything I can do to help.”
“Are we still meeting about the fundraiser today after school for thirty minutes?” Adam asked.
I gazed into his eyes. “If that works?” I whispered.
“Yeah.” He stared at my lips.
Energy pulsed between us, and the connection from Christmas trees snapped back into focus, like it never left. I met his eyes as he stared into mine.
The moment stretched and pulled. The corner of his mouth raised up into a smile.
“You better be frickin’ joking me.” Jessica growled as she pushed Adam’s shoulder. “Is this why you haven’t been returning my calls?” She gestured to me.
The gym lights flipped on, and my body flinched at her anger.
Adam closed his eyes. “No, look, Jessica,” he turned toward her. “I was trying to stock up Mom’s firewood last time.”
“Mmm Hmmm.” She scowled.
“I promise.” He shifted closer to her.
I stared at the ground, my hands feeling clammy on my lap. Then my class came off the bleachers. Hallelujah, a distraction. “I better go,” I called over my shoulder as I rushed toward my class.
“Okay, kids, if you have parents here, you can go say hi. When the bell rings, we are going to meet by the exit sign.” I pointed to the green sign above the door.
Some started to run. “Wait, where are we meeting?” Several kids pointed up to the sign and repeated the instructions, half ran off. I shook my head and shrugged.
Danny came over to me. “I remembered the actions this time!” He fist-pumped and looked over my shoulder.
“You did great!” I put my hand up for a high-five. “I’m so glad you decided to come.” I would have been heartbroken if we were singing and Danny was sitting in the classroom sad.
He nodded. “Me too. Where’s my dad?”
So much for ignoring Adam and Jessica. I turned to point to where we were seated, but Adam was now a few feet behind me.
“Oh!” I placed a hand over my heart. “I guess he is right here.” My eyebrows lowered, my stomach turning sour from the image of him leaning toward Jessica and talking to her.
No, I wouldn’t let it.
Because you and Adam are just friends. He is a parent to one of your students, I reminded myself.
Plus, I had no idea if there was something with Jessica.
If so I would feel like a jerk. Also I would feel like Adam is a jerk.
How dare he look at me like that if he is dating Jessica!
Don’t be weird. I took a deep breath. It’s not like you’re dating or something.
Ugh! I was getting a headache.
I closed my eyes.
Danny ran up and gave Adam a big hug. Adam’s body stiffened in shock and then his face lit up as his eyes met mine.
“Nice job, Champ!” He ruffled his hair. “I’m so proud of you.” Adam leaned toward me and whispered, “So, is the neurodivergent one basketball or football?”
I raised my right shoulder. “I don’t think it matters.”
His eyebrows lowered in thought as he slowly nodded. “Could we talk more later?”
Did he mean he wanted to talk about Danny and neurodivergent things?
I mean, that was probably totally what he meant.
“Sure.” He kept looking at me, and I wasn’t sure what to do with my hands, so I reached over and rubbed Danny’s back.
“I’m so glad you came to the performance, Danny. Everyone was so happy to see you.”
He showed his big gap-tooth grin as the bell rang. I sighed in relief, grateful for the reason to add distance between Adam and me.
“Ms. Faith’s class,” I called over the voices, “to the exit sign, please.”
Danny grabbed Adam’s hand in his. “Can you walk me back to class?”
“Sure, Champ.”
Danny stepped up next to me and grabbed my hand with his free one. “Sorry I threw your hat, Ms. Faith.”
I looked into his blue eyes. “Hey, it’s okay, Danny.” I raised my eyebrows. “It’s not okay to throw,” I said, “but it’s okay to get overwhelmed.” I squeezed his small hand in mine. “We’ll just have to come up with some different—”
“I know, strategies.” His brow furrowed.
I wanted to hug this little boy until he popped. “Yep. Strategies.”
If I had known how much my own therapy lessons could help my future students, I would have tried to learn even more.
Someone loudly cleared their throat behind me. I turned to see Jessica glaring angry daggers into my soul. If looks could kill, I’m pretty sure I would need a sub tomorrow. She fumed with her arms folded over her chest as she looked at the three of us.
We continued to walk down the hall, and I leaned toward Adam and lowered my voice. “Hey, so, um, about you and Jessica?”
Adam closed his eyes. “I swear, we’re just friends.”
“Does she know that?” I looked over my shoulder, making sure no one was behind me as we made it to the classroom. “You go ahead, Danny, I will be right in.”
He nodded and gave his dad another hug and left Adam and me in the hallway. I leaned against the doorway cubby leading to my room. “It’s just that I’m pretty sure she is planning my funeral.”
Adam sighed. “I mean, I told her I wasn’t ready to date anyone, and that I wanted to be friends.”
I pursed my lips together and released them with a pop.
“I see…” I scrunched my nose. “That’s not exactly the same thing.
But I guess it’s none of my business.” I looked at the ground.
“Because, I mean, it’s not like we’re dating…
We are also just friends.” I looked up into his brown eyes and they held me captive.
He shook his head slowly. “Right.”
“Right…” I waited, unsure what to say, and the English language completely failed me between what was spoken and what was left unsaid. I quickly exhaled. “Mkay, well, I better go.” I turned and rushed into my classroom.