Chapter 4
Chapter Four
I love my daughter. I love my daughter.
Lauren kept those words swirling around her head like a tornado as she watched Reed examine her house. Again. This was the third time he’d looked at her space as though he was expecting something to jump out of a corner. She didn’t know how he could think that when her whole house consisted of three rooms. The room which encompassed all the living and eating spaces. A bedroom which she and Charlee shared. And the final room was a bathroom/laundry combo.
She’d been lucky to find it, and the owners of the main house were a lovely couple who hadn’t minded Lauren and her baby daughter renting the unit they’d built for Sally’s mother who’d passed away before she’d even lived in it. They also kept the rent at a rate she could afford.
Lauren wanted something bigger, something with two bedrooms. Sharing a bedroom with her daughter had been fine when Charlee was just a baby, but now she was growing up and needed her own space. An impossible dream at the moment. Lauren wasn’t qualified for much more than what she was doing at Tabby’s Café. She was saving as much as she could, but Charlee had needed new clothes and shoes recently because she’d had a growth spurt and she couldn’t go to school with shoes too small and skirts that were too short.
Some days Lauren wondered if she’d ever get out of this place. If there was a chance that she would be able to buy something that she liked the moment she saw it because money wasn’t an issue.
Now she had Patrick to worry about.
Him turning up out of the blue wasn’t what she needed right now. He also looked like he had the means to be able to give Charlee everything she wanted. His clothes hadn’t been from a thrift store like hers were. No, his clothes, while not designer, looked like they’d come from one of the men’s stores found in most of the shopping malls.
“What are you thinking about?” Reed asked.
“Nothing much.” No way was she going to tell him what was going through her mind. He didn’t need to know. “Are you ready to start making the pizzas?
Lauren hoped that Reed would jump on the change of subject and not question her further. She didn’t want to talk about what happened, although, they would probably need to touch on the subject of him announcing that they were engaged—thank goodness he hadn’t mentioned anything about it in front of Charlee.
Her daughter was getting to the age where she was more and more aware of what was going on around her. Of her friends who had both a mother and father, and she knew that she didn’t have a father. It hadn’t bothered her daughter in the past, but it was starting to become an issue now.
Something else to add to my list of failings as a mother.
“Ren, it’s going to be okay. Whatever is troubling you, we’ll get through it together.”
Irrational anger flared to life at the shortening of her name, as if he had a right to do it. Her hands clenched and she had to make a concentrated effort to not hit Reed on the arm. “My name is Lauren, and you don’t know anything,” she hissed. “There is no us to work through things. It’s just me. It’s always been me who has to sort through everything. Make sure Charlee has everything she wants and needs.”
Lauren turned away so Reed wouldn’t see that she was on the verge of losing it. That she wasn’t about to release all the emotions she always kept bottled down.
Warm hands landed on her shoulder. She should’ve known he wouldn’t sit in his chair while she battled her inner turmoil. When he turned her slowly and pulled her against his chest, she didn’t resist, even though she knew she should.
Would it hurt to let go for a few seconds? Let someone share her burden before she took it all back again?
“Is Mummy sad?” Charlee’s sweet voice burst the bubble she’d allowed herself to be engulfed in.
Taking a deep breath, she pulled away from Reed and smiled down at her daughter. “No, sweetie, I’m fine.”
“Are you sure, because it looked like you weren’t happy at all.”
Sometimes her daughter was too observant and too mature for her age. She should be like every other seven-year-old who only worried about what her dolls were doing. Or, playing dress-up with her friends.
“I’m sure. Now we’re going start making the pizzas.” Lauren squatted down and waved Charlee closer as if she was about to share a big secret. “Do you think Reed will get pizza sauce on him?”
Her daughter looked over at the man who still stood sentry in the middle of their small kitchen, the left side of his mouth quirked up in a half smile. Lauren hadn’t made any attempt to keep her voice low so that Reed would hear what she’d said. Hence his smile. He’d heard and if she knew anything about the men who worked for Power Security, they never backed down from a challenge—or good old-fashioned teasing.
“Nope, Reed’s too smart to get sauce on him. But he may burn the bottom of his pizza though.”
Reed laughed. “You think I don’t know how to cook pizza, munchkin? I’ll have you know I’m an expert at cooking pizza.”
“Frozen doesn’t count,” Charlee fired back, and Lauren burst out laughing at the shocked look on Reed’s face. Clearly he hadn’t expected Charlee to know her pizzas. Lauren had found that, because her daughter only liked cheese pizza while Lauren was partial to a Margherita style, it was far cheaper for them to make their own, especially as Lauren grew her own basil and tomatoes.
“What gave me away?” he asked.
Charlee lifted her shoulders. “Dunno.”
“Well, that settles that, I guess,” Lauren said, not entirely surprised by her daughter’s answer.
“I guess it does, but I’m going to prove that I can cook a pizza without getting pizza sauce on me and not burn it.”
“We’ll see,” Charlee sing-songed.
An hour and half later, Lauren’s small table was littered with the remnants of three pizzas. Reed’s plate was empty while both Lauren and Charlee’s had some pieces remaining. It would be lunch for them tomorrow. Or maybe Sunday dinner.
Charlee was yawning, and Lauren could see that her daughter was beginning to fade. It had been a busy day for her. “Time for bed, Charlee-Bee,” she said.
Her daughter sat up and tried to widen her eyes to give the impression she hadn’t been falling asleep just seconds ago. “I’m not tired, Mummy. It’s Saturday night. I don’t have to get up early to go to school tomorrow.”
With Reed occupying the chair next to her daughter, Lauren wasn’t the least bit surprised by what she said.
Reed yawned, stretching his arms high in the air. “Bed sounds like a good idea. I should probably head off.”
There had been nothing real about Reed’s yawn, and Lauren appreciated his efforts to convince his daughter that it was indeed bedtime.
“You go to bed this early?” Charlee asked.
“Yep. I get up really early each morning and do my PT.”
Like always when she didn’t understand something, Charlee’s nose scrunched up adorably. “PT? What’s that?”
“Physical training. I go to the beach and meet up with all the other guys from Power Security and we do exercises. Run up and down the beach. Then take a swim.”
It didn’t take much for Lauren to imagine Reed wearing low slung board shorts or tight fighting swimming trunks. His muscled chest on display. The chest she’d been resting against a couple of hours ago. She’d felt how hard it was beneath her cheek and now she knew how it got to be that way.
“You do that every day? And on weekends? Even if it’s raining or really cold or really hot?” The incredulousness in her daughter’s voice had Lauren biting her lip to refrain from laughing.
“We sure do.”
“Wow. I don’t think I could do that.”
“It comes with practice, but to be able to do that I need to go to bed and let my body rest. Sleep is the best way for our bodies to grow.”
“Oh,” Charlee said. “Okay. I guess I’ll go to bed.”
“Good idea and maybe one day in the school holidays, your mum may let me take you to the beach and you can watch us all work out.”
Her daughter whooped as she ran into the bedroom.
“I wouldn’t mind that,” she muttered under breath, as she started to clean up the table. The very idea of watching the men from Power Security work out, all bare chests glistening in the early morning sunlight, sounded like a great way to start the day.
Had Tabitha gone and watched Steve workout? Did he even workout? Of course he did, he wouldn’t expect his employees to keep in shape and not do it himself.
“I’m sure that can be arranged.”
Reed’s voice was close to her ear, and she had to again try and control her body’s response to his closeness. She should be embarrassed that he’d heard what she said, but if she was being honest, she was hoping he had.
“Someone has to watch Charlee so she doesn’t bother you,” she replied, primly.
Reed laughed, but Charlee returned, so he didn’t say anything—something Lauren was glad for.
“Can Reed tuck me in, Mummy?” Charlee’s request didn’t shock Lauren in the slightest. Her daughter was smitten with the handsome former soldier, and Lauren had to admit, Reed had been nothing but accommodating to Charlee and her questions all evening.
“Is that okay with you, Lauren?”
How many men would ask that question? Lauren didn’t know the answer, only that she appreciated that Reed had checked with her. “It’s fine. I’ll come in after to say goodnight. Is that okay, Charlee?”
“Yep!” The little girl yelled and grabbed Reed’s hand, dragging him to their shared bedroom.
A flash of embarrassment hit her when she realized Reed would see the room they slept in. What would he think when he saw the two single beds that took up the small space?
Did it matter what he thought? She was doing the best she could and she was providing her daughter with a roof over her head. While Charlee didn’t have a vast array of clothes, what she had were clean. The most important thing Lauren provided was love and security.
Determined not to think about Reed’s impressions of her house and bedroom, she finished clearing up the table and putting the plates into the small dishwasher. There were other dishes she would have to handwash but she’d deal with those after Reed had left.
She was wiping down the table when Reed came out. “Charlee says she’s ready for you.”
Lauren chuckled. “She really said that?”
“Those were her exact words, I promise.” Reed placed his hand over his heart. “I had to bite my cheek so I didn’t laugh. She was so serious.”
There was so much about her daughter that amazed Lauren, the words and ideas that came out of her mouth was one of them. “I don’t know where she picks these things up, but I guess I better go in before she complains.”
She brushed past Reed and itched to slide her fingers across his chest, but she kept her hands firmly at her side. She walked into the bedroom, and Charlee was on her side, looking at Lauren’s empty bed. According to her it was her favorite way to sleep because she could see her anytime she woke up.
“Did Reed do a good job at tucking you in?” she asked as she came up and sat on the edge of the bed.
“He did. I had fun today at Marcia’s place but tonight was even better. I like Reed.”
Charlee’s eyes shone with hero worship as she talked about Reed, worrying Lauren. The only reason Reed had been around them today was because of Patrick. If Patrick hadn’t turned up it would’ve just been the two of them. Lauren had to remember that. This thing with Reed wasn’t because he wanted to be there of his own free will. It was because he was being the protector his job required him to be.
While tonight had been fun, Lauren couldn’t make a habit of it. She couldn’t let Charlee get attached to Reed, only for him to walk away when he decided he was bored with her annoying him. Or if Reed found being around Charlee was too much. She loved her daughter with her whole heart, but the enthusiasm she’d displayed tonight toward Reed was only a fraction of what her daughter was capable of.
“I’m glad you had a good time today and tonight. Now it’s time to sleep.” She leaned down and brushed her lips against her daughter’s cheek. “I love you, Charlee-Bee.”
“I love you, too, Mummy.” She yawned and snuggled down under her covers. It wouldn’t be too long before her daughter was in dreamland.
Lauren got up and went back out to the main living area, leaving the door open a crack so she could hear if Charlee needed anything—which she doubted but it was something she’d always done and Lauren didn’t think it was a habit she’d break anytime soon.
She stopped in her tracks when she saw Reed standing at the sink, washing the dishes she hadn’t been able to fit into the dishwasher.
Who was this man? He was too good to be true. Lauren had been fooled by a nice guy once, she wouldn’t let herself be fooled again.