56. Calvin
CALVIN
Despite knowing it was the right thing to do, I spent all night regretting not kissing Sienna.
Every inch of me screamed to do so. But my needs aren’t the most important thing anymore. She is.
I rub the back of my neck as I walk down the hallway at the arena, dread churning inside me.
Today is the day we officially meet our newest player on the roster. I’m pretty sure we’re all feeling apprehensive.
I’m one of the last to arrive, and as I step into the meeting room, every single set of eyes in the room turns to me, quickly followed by a sigh of relief.
Safe to say Nash hasn’t arrived yet, then.
I scan the faces, each one of them pulled tight. But no one looks as tense as Kodie.
I get it. They haven’t seen eye to eye for years. I can only imagine how he’s feeling about stepping out onto the ice together for the first time since they were kids.
“Hey, how’s it going?” I ask as I take my seat with Monroe and Rett on my right, and Linc and Kodie on my left. Handsy is in his usual space right up front, ready to listen to whatever Coach has to say.
“Wonderful,” Kodie deadpans.
“Keep an open mind, man. This could be exactly what we need to secure the Cup this year,” Linc says, putting as much enthusiasm into his tone as possible.
A few other guys join us and settle in before the door opens again, and Coach strolls in with Nash and Fletch on his heels.
“Good morning,” Coach says, making a point of looking at each of us as Fletch slips into the space beside Handsy. “You all know Cooper Nash, right?” There’s a mumble of agreement and a couple of hellos, mainly from the rookies who are apparently unaware of the tension rippling through the room.
My teeth grind, anger shooting through me the second Nash’s dark eyes land on mine. I’m immediately taken back to that moment his big body collided with mine, sending me tumbling and causing a pain to shoot up my leg that I instantly knew was bad news.
I’ve spent way too much time thinking about ways to get him back for that hit. It’s immature of me, but hockey is my life. I gave up everything for it, including my family, and for him to be able to take it away so easily …
My fists clench where they rest on my thighs; it’s a movement that doesn’t go unnoticed by Nash.
When he lifts his head again, I see something flash in his eyes. Regret, maybe? An apology? But no sooner have I seen it than it disappears, and he moves onto the others in the room. I’m pretty sure every single person in here holds their breath when he finds Kodie.
Nash swallows thickly and quickly diverts his eyes.
Whatever happened between the two of them, they’re gonna need to find a way to deal with it, because we need to be on the same page if we’re getting anywhere close to the Cup this year.
They either need to get it out of their systems, or we may as well admit defeat now.
If anyone was expecting him to say anything, then they’re disappointed, because no sooner has he said his silent hello to everyone in the room, than he turns his back on us and drops his ass into an empty chair.
This isn’t the first trade we’ve experienced, and it won’t be the last, but it’s certainly the most controversial I’ve lived through, even more so than Rett joining us. Our GM has made a move here that could make or break us, and I guess only time will tell how it pans out.
Our meeting runs longer than it usually does, but I can’t say I’m surprised. The guys have three more games before going into the Christmas break, and everyone wants to ensure we bring home three Ws. It’ll put us in an incredible position going into the new year.
Once Coach dismissed us, the guys went to get dressed for practice, and I went to find Darcy, who was desperate to know how things went this morning.
I gave him the little information I had on Nash’s first appearance as a Viper, and we got to work. Of course, that wasn’t the only gossip Darcy wanted. He also demanded an update on my love life.
“Have you bought her a gift yet?”
“A gift?” I ask, my brows pinching.
“Oh my God, it’s worse than I thought,” he mutters quietly to himself. “It’s Christmas next week. You’ve bought her a gift, right?”
“Oh, right. Yeah, of course.”
Darcy’s lips press into a thin line as he sees through my lie.
“She’s going to her parents for Christmas, so I thought I’d give it to her after.”
“Before,” he counters.
“What?”
“You need to give it to her before she goes. Show her you’re thinking of her.”
“I am. Constantly. To the point I worry it might be an addiction,” I confess.
“So show her.”
I drag my hand down my face.
“Do you have any ideas?”
I’ve never bought a gift for a woman before. Well, aside from my mom when I was kid, but this is very different.
“I’m sure I can figure it out.”
“Jewelry, perfume, a day out, something sentimental. Do you have anything from all those years ago you can surprise her with, prove that she’s never been far from your mind?”
Ideas spark, and a smile twitches at my lips. “I’ll figure it out.”
“Good, and fast. She leaves on Sunday. What are you cooking tomorrow?”
“You really need to get yourself a boyfriend, you know that?” I tease.
“You’re telling me,” he scoffs. “All of this is being wasted,” he says, waving his hand in front of himself.
“Keep the advice coming, though, man. I’m sure the others will be grateful for it, too, at times.”
“Oh, don’t I know it. Linc’s always in here trying to find ways out of whatever stupid shit he’s done.”
I bark a laugh. “Conflict of interest there.”
“My point exactly. He waltzes in here all cocky like I haven’t already heard from his better half and agreed that he’s an asshole who needs to get on his knees and grovel for forgiveness.”
“No wonder Parker keeps forgiving him if your advice is to get on his knees for her.”
Darcy winks. “There isn’t much that can’t be forgiven with good head.”
I snort. “And there I was thinking you were different, man. But you’re just the same as us. The romance is a cover, huh?”
He attempts a look of pure innocence, but the way his dimples threaten gives him away.
“Is Sienna spending New Year’s with her parents as well?” he asks, circling back.
“Uh…No, I think she’s home.”
Darcy picks up some stretching bands and turns his back on me while he folds them up. “What about her brother?”
I narrow my eyes at him.
“What about him?” I ask, although I have a very good idea.
“Oh, we…uh…hung out when he was here before.”
“Oh, really? Might I not be the only one with a thing for a Wentworth sibling?” I tease.
His shoulders tense. “We had a good time. I’d be down for a repeat, is all I’m saying.”
My smirk grows. “Let me off the pull ups and I’ll see what I can find out,” I promise as I climb off his table and shrug my shirt on. “Or you could message him,” I suggest.
“Don’t have his number.”
“And what a shame it is that that’s the only way of contacting someone these days,” I deadpan. He finally turns around and scowls at me.
“Shut up,” he mutters, although he does so with a smile playing on his lips. “It was a one-night thing. If he’s here for New Year’s, then cool. If he’s not, I’m sure I’ll find someone else to kiss at midnight.”
“You coming to the team party?” I ask, rolling my shoulders, testing out his handiwork.
“Haven’t decided yet, but if I want a kiss at midnight, my options are going to be significantly limited if I’m celebrating with the team, huh?”
“Oh, I don’t know. Garrett reckons there’s at least one gay player on every team.”
Darcy thinks for a moment. “Well, I’m yet to discover which one it is, and I gotta say, I’ve got a pretty good gaydar.”
“Well, hockey player or not, your man’s out there somewhere.”
“Aw, Killer, are you going all soft on me?”
“It’s your fault, encouraging all this romantic shit.”
“You were doing a pretty good job all on your own.”
“Until I fucked it up,” I grunt.
“Everyone makes mistakes, Killer. The stakes are always higher when it involves someone we love, and it makes everything more intense.”
“You sound like you’re talking from experience.”
He shrugs as he moves across the room.
“I guess I’d better go shopping then, huh?” I say when it becomes obvious that he isn’t going to share anything. “See you tomorrow?”
“You got it.”
As I walk out of the trainers' room, movement to the right catches my eye, and I turn and head that way.
Kodie and Fletch are standing at the end of the tunnel, still wearing their training-session gear. I glance around them at the ice to see the D-men still out there.
“Hey, how’s it going?” I ask, stepping up beside them as they watch Nash shoot around the ice in a Vipers training jersey.
Fuck, yeah, that’s weird.
“I think it’ll be fine,” Fletch says after a beat.
Kodie just grunts.
“He’s a beast of a defenseman. He’ll strengthen whatever line Coach puts him on, and he’ll protect Handsy with his life.”
“Yeah, until his anger gets the better of him.”
“Maybe it won’t,” Fletch says, although there isn’t a lot of conviction behind it. “Maybe it was Vancouver that fired him up like that. We’ve all seen the difference in Rett since he became a Viper.”
“I’m not sure this is the same,” Kodie mutters. “Nash has hated the world and everyone in it for so long, it’s got to be ingrained by now.”
“Then we need to figure out what the fuck his issues are sooner rather than later, so we can get this team together.”
Kodie lifts his hand and squeezes Fletch’s shoulder. “Good luck with that, man.”
As if he knows we’re talking about him, Nash looks up and directly at us. When he sees Kodie, his eyes narrow.
“Fuck this,” Kodie grunts before spinning around and stalking off.
“Seems like you’ve got your work cut out for you there, Cap,” I tease.
He sighs. “It’s bullshit that stems from their college days; it can’t be all that hard to bury, right?”
“Hmm, rather you than me.”
“Fucking hell.” Fletch groans, dragging his hand down his face.
It’s only now that I glance over at him. The dark circles under his eyes catch me by surprise.
“Is everything okay?” I ask, concern tugging at me.
“What? Yeah. The last few weeks have just been a lot of travel, and with the holidays coming up and everything it adds a lot of pressure, especially on Reese, who’s left here holding down the fort.”
“Man, I haven’t seen her in ages.”
He quirks a brow, and I know exactly what he’s about to say before the words leave his mouth.
“Don’t,” I warn, aware that I’ve avoided the last few events she’s hosted.
The first couple were just after my injury, and I wasn’t in any mood to put on a smile and fundraise. And then, well, Sienna happened, and there wasn’t a chance I was missing out on spending time with her.
“You guys are good though, yeah?”
Stepping away from my player ways and opening my eyes to what being in a real relationship is really like for the first time gives me a different perspective on how the married guys on the team are forced to divide up their time.
It can’t be easy. While I might be gagging to get back on the ice, the thought of next season approaching, knowing that I’m going to spend months on the road and away from Sienna, fills me with dread.
Assuming, of course, she’s still interested in me by then.
“Yeah, we’re great,” he says, a smile appearing on his lips as he thinks of his wife, but unlike usual, it doesn’t quite meet his eyes.
I’m about to ask more when Ridgeway, our defensive coach, calls time on their session, and all the guys turn toward us.
Fletch is immediately swept up into a conversation with Rett and Monroe, while the other guys stomp past us, pulling their helmets off.
Nash, though, lingers at the back, and the second our eyes meet, I know he’s heading my way.
“Hey,” he says, his deep voice rumbling through the air.
“Hey.” I fight to keep my expression neutral, but I have no idea if I succeed.
“How’s it going? With your rehab?”
“Honestly, it fucking sucks. It’s long and painful and fucking torture.”
He winces. “For what it’s worth, I’m sorry.”
“Yeah,” I muse. “I’m sure you are.”