Chapter 56
Chapter
Fifty-Six
Sydney
“… s obering video from a fight that took place earlier today. Mathias D’Arc is definitely back and, as you saw, is abducting soldiers from around the world and converting them to zombies to make his army. He and his followers have attacked at least four Privileged families, killing many and abducting the women and children. Take precautions. Keep close watch on your family. Never stray far from your wand. Have some means of communication nearby. If you’re being attacked, contact Bram Rion. Updates will follow as necessary. I’m Sydney Blair. Stay safe, and good afternoon.”
With that, Bram waves a hand in front of the ancient, heavy mirror hanging in the library. Beside him, Sabelle stands with a smile, despite the strain on her face.
“Good job,” Bram praises, exiting into the hall. “Angry Council members will start screaming their displeasure in mere moments, but at least innocent people have been warned.”
“You’ve done the right thing,” Sabelle adds.
He nods absently and faces me. “Are you all right?”
Transcasting the news of Mathias’s return was both exhilarating and bittersweet. Without Caden here to cheer me on, hold my hand, and love me afterward…a part of me is missing.
“Right as rain.” I force a plastic smile to hide my melancholy and exhaustion.
“I’ll pretend I believe you and wait in my office for the deluge of messages. The rest of the warriors and I should plan our next moves.” He places a hand on my shoulder. “You’ve done magickind a great service at much risk to yourself. I appreciate you. I know the others do as well.”
Looking tired but determined, Bram retreats.
“I don’t know what he’s going to do,” Sabelle murmurs once he’s gone.
“Do?” I ask.
“He’s nearly out of energy and can’t locate his mate,” the witch explains. “Thus far, he’s only skimmed the barest amount from a surrogate. I hope he finds this mystery woman. Or takes more energy. He’s too important to the cause to go on like this.”
How horrifying. “What will happen if he doesn’t?”
“He’ll die. It’s why I’ve been tending Caden’s brother. Technically, he’s no longer mated since Anka broke with him, but he rejected all females until I duped him into believing I was her. His condition is still acute. He’s keeping his strength now, but his mind… I don’t know if he’ll ever recover.”
That’s what has Caden so dismayed? He never explained, but I see the truth he avoided telling me. Sabelle’s explanation makes all the pieces click into place. Lucan’s magical “divorce” caused Lucan’s condition. Caden is rejecting a future with me, not because I wrote in the diary, but because he fears becoming like his brother.
Suddenly, Sabelle spears me with a direct stare. “You’re right. Sorry to read your mind. Terrible habit. Caden is terrified of becoming like Lucan.” She shakes her head. “I hope Caden finds Anka before it’s too late.”
I have to see the man, know what spooked Caden. Trying to fight something I can’t see is impossible.
“When Caden left, I told him I would be by once they were both settled in at Lucan’s house. I think it’s time you see the dangerous side of magic,” Sabelle says.
I hardly need more proof to understand magic’s potential peril. But perhaps this will unravel the rest of the Caden puzzle.
“Please.”
“No pictures. No story. I simply want you to understand, not report.”
Naturally. If I reported on Lucan’s condition, it might spur Mathias to take the mates of other Doomsday Brethren.
“Just Bram,” Sabelle provides. “Marrok isn’t a wizard, and none of the others are fully mated.”
“ Fully mated?” I ask.
Graceful as always, Sabelle ascends the stairs. “Typically, when a wizard Calls to you, you Bind to him, and you’re mated. But sometimes a wizard Calls…and he’s Renounced.”
“How can he be partially mated if the bond wasn’t established?”
“To him it was. When a wizard speaks those words, his mate is imprinted on his heart, regardless of whether she reciprocates those feelings. He’s bound by that Call. Until the woman dies, he is hers exclusively.”
My jaw drops. “And one of these big warriors?—”
“Shock. He Called to Anka shortly before Lucan did. She eventually Renounced him.”
Another jaw dropper. Lucan and Shock quarreling over the same woman?
“For over a century. When Lucan slipped into mate mourning, we called Caden here to care for his brother. He’s afraid because he knows you’re his, but has seen firsthand the tragic possibilities of mating.”
Sabelle reaches the top of the stairs and heads for a corner room in the family wing, where I’ve never been. When the witch pushes her way into a glamorous space, my jaw threatens to drop once more.
Sabelle’s bedroom is a symphony of luxury. Sumptuous cream silk bedding, kissed with golden accents, spills across the bed like liquid sunlight. Rich, melted chocolate hues provide a sensual contrast, warming the pristine walls and elegantly swagged drapes. Crystal candlesticks catch the light, scattering prismatic sparkles across plush, inviting furniture. Every inch exudes opulence and femininity—a perfect reflection of Sabelle herself. It’s the kind of room that I’d never want to leave.
“It’s lovely,” I say.
Sabelle smiles. “My haven. I just need to grab a few things. Should only be a moment.”
Why not just summon objects?
The beautiful witch sends me a chiding stare. “I’m saving my energy for what’s to come.”
She grabs a cape, a length of silk rope, and a pair of handcuffs. My brows raise.
“I don’t know what I’m facing over there,” Sabelle explains. “Here, we had Lucan well restrained so he wouldn’t be a danger.”
Suddenly, I’m not sure I want to see Lucan. But Sabelle grabs my arm. Blackness and that topsy-turvy feeling invade my stomach. A weightlessness leaves me at odds and ends.
Then the floor appears beneath us, and we zoom into a room straight out of Tuscany, with walls like an autumn afternoon and drapes the color of wine, accented by a gleaming hardwood floor.
The only thing out of place is the snarling man secured by padded cuffs to all four corners of the bed. His dark hair has been pulled back, revealing a face that would normally be considered handsome. It’s so like Caden’s with high cheekbones, a wide mouth, and a sculpted jaw. But instead of the familiar vibrant blue, Lucan’s eyes are angry black pinpricks. No warmth or passion, as feral as a wild wolf’s.
Lucan snaps his unfocused gaze in our direction and roars, struggling against his bonds. The bed groans in protest. Surprise zaps me. I step back—way back.
“Losing Anka did this to him?” I ask.
Sabelle nods solemnly.
I’ve never met Lucan, but I ache for him and the pain he is obviously enduring.
“Because she’s no longer mated to him? Doesn’t that release him? Or does he suffer because the break was against his will?”
“It doesn’t matter why the mating ends. Magic makes the ties between mates stronger than humans. Unlike divorce, there’s a magical connection that doesn’t simply disappear because the union is over.”
“Even under all his madness, he misses her?”
“Lucan doesn’t remember who he is, but he knows Anka at a core level. I can only give him energy by tricking him into believing I’m her. I use her soap and shampoo, wear her clothes, whatever I must.”
Under all that torment, Lucan waits for his one true love. And she might be gone forever. Tears well in my eyes.
“But if Anka is free of Mathias and she left Aquarius, why hasn’t she returned to Lucan?”
“She doesn’t remember him. Magic’s way of ensuring survival of the species, I suppose. She’s currently mateless and in need of a male with whom she can recharge her energy. If she remembered Lucan and suffered as he does, she would never allow another to mount her and potentially impregnate her. Conceiving is possible but difficult if unmated. But if she had Lucan in her memory and heart, she’d likely never mate again.”
“Nor will Lucan.”
“Men who have been well mated usually emerge from their mate mourning with a strong yearning to mate again.”
“Usually? I hear uncertainty in your voice.”
Sabelle winces. “Lucan may be different. They were perfect together. So in love…”
I dare to glance at Lucan again. His gleaming chest and shoulders ripple with each strain against the restraints. His growl is a threat that sends shivers down my spine. His love must be powerful, indeed. And Sabelle has to trick him into bedding her?
“It’s the only way to keep him alive.”
Caden’s reluctance to mate makes sense now. He grips so tightly to his control. Lucan’s descent into madness because of magic would be the worst horror to a soldier with so much self-command.
I need to talk to him, if only to say that I understand. “Is Caden here?”
“I’m sure. He doesn’t know we’re here. Lucan long ago allowed Bram and me to visit without chiming in.” Sabelle hands me a little white rock. “I’m leaving, since Lucan’s energy is holding and I’m not needed. When you’re ready to return, just toss this stone in the air and say my name. I’ll return for you.” Sabelle hugs me. “But fair warning: given everything, Caden will be on edge.”
Caden
Behind me, I hear a shuffle and the clearing of a feminine throat. I twist around in the leather recliner, expecting to see Sabelle. The sight of Sydney punches me with a breathless rush of thrill and need.
I left her four bloody hours ago, and it feels like an eternity. I miss her with a frightening intensity, like a junkie craving his fix.
After settling Lucan into his room, I’ve done little except mindlessly stare at the telly and wish I could hear or smell or touch Sydney. No, I want to taste her, repercussions be damned.
Impossible. I have to get my desire under control so I can protect her. But my fucking energy is waning now that the battle and the adrenaline rush is over. As an unmated male, I could bed anyone—and must soon. In theory.
But I only want her.
Then my brain kicks in. Why is she here? Sabelle, I realize. And the only reason for the witch to visit is Lucan.
Anxiety buzzes in my blood, and I rein in the curse on the tip of my tongue. Sydney now knows far more about my objections. That fact softens her face.
Damn it, she feels sorry for me.
“I know you’re not expecting me.” She takes a hesitant step into the room. “I don’t mean to barge in, but I had to see you. Why didn’t you tell me about Lucan and his mate mourning?”
I take a step closer—but not too close. That would be dangerous. “Because it doesn’t change anything.”
“But your refusal to share with me does.”
She rushes across the room to me. Her smell blindsides me with hunger and longing. I clench my fists to stop myself from hauling her into my arms.
“I understand your fear,” she murmurs. “Why you’ve avoided mating with me. Your brother has lost all control, and that’s something you strive to retain. I’m sorry for him, but you don’t know that Lucan’s condition would become yours?—”
“Given the way you’ve thrown yourself into a war, I sure as hell do. Your bravery is commendable, firecracker, but it’s placed you in grave danger. You don’t take precautions, and I know you’ll try to refuse my protection, even if I insist you follow my rules?—”
“Your rules? I’m hardly a child.”
I step closer, toe-to-toe, towering over her. That spicy-sweet scent of hers infiltrates and intoxicates my senses, tightening my gut. My cock springs to turgid life moments later. I have to get rid of her quickly. My resistance is weakening.
“You met Mathias face-to-face and duped him. Angered him. He won’t forget that. Or the fact you revealed him to magickind. He will hunt you down and torture you. You were warned, but you didn’t use caution or bow out,” I growl. “Now it’s too late. My desire for you has grown far beyond rational. If we mated, I would end up like my brother.”
“I’m clever, and you’ll protect me. Bram and the others will, too.”
“I’m no longer involved, remember?”
“You should be. Strength in numbers. If you stayed together, everyone would be safer while we make a difference. If we mated, we’d have each other. I don’t need more than you.”
“If we mated, I could probably count our days together on one hand. This is war. Mathias is magickind’s ultimate sociopath. Evil, determined, smart, charismatic, powerful, and willing to kill. And he won’t die by a simple bullet, as you saw in his warehouse.”
“We’ve weakened his army,” she argues. “Taking the fight to him was the right thing to do, and using the book as bait was perfect. Maybe peace will come soon. Then we’ll have wasted precious time we could have spent together.”
I rake a frustrated hand through my hair. We’re talking in circles, and still she refuses to understand. “Peace? Last time it took decades to vanquish Mathias, along with an army of experienced wizards. Many died. Too many were sacrificed.”
“The same is true in human wars. And like those, we don’t have any control over who lives or who dies. We only have control over what we do with our time on this earth.” She squeezes my hand. “If Lucan and Anka’s separation has shown us anything, it should be that, while lovers can suffer, love itself endures. Even without remembering Lucan, Anka missed someone dear like a physical pang. She spoke about it more than once.”
“And Lucan has been reduced to an animal.”
“You fear becoming like Lucan so much you would rather skip whatever time we might have together? If that’s the case, you don’t love me as deeply as I love you.” She sniffs. “And maybe I’ve no one to blame but myself.”
“Are you mad, woman. I love you. As deep as the oceans. As vast as the universe. But I won’t be able to endure the pain of losing more. Of losing you!”
“People live, they love…and they die.”
“But I lose over and over again.” A well of memories and fears rises inside me, drowning out logic and caution. Opening my past to Sydney will change everything.
But continuing to hide the truth is hurting her, and I can’t bear that anymore.
“I can’t find Anka, and Lucan is likely going to die. Today, I had to kill one of my old marine buddies in Mathias’s warehouse. It was one of the hardest fucking things I’ve ever done. And still not as difficult as the day magic ruined my life…”