37. Dameon
Chapter thirty-seven
Dameon
T he whiskey burns its way down my throat, the familiar warmth settling in my stomach. I’ll need all the help I can get tonight. Because tonight marks the end, the final nail in our coffin.
I’m constantly drawn to this place, like a moth to a flame, all because of her . Hoping for just a glimpse as she moves about the bar, mingling with patrons, serving drinks. It’s starting to feel like a cruel ritual, and I’m beginning to resent it. But tonight, it’s over. It has to be.
I had thought our final fuck at Le Jardin last month would be enough to get her out of my system, but it only made it worse. It’s as though she’s carved out a spot in my heart. Dr. Avery would be furious with me if he knew what I’d done. The devastation on Hailee’s face as I walked away will haunt me forever. I’ll replay the sight of her broken expression in my mind for the rest of my life.
I had hoped time would ease the fear of betrayal embedded deep in my bones. But it hasn’t. It lingers, a constant presence. I want to trust her, I do. She holds my heart, my body, my soul. Yet, that niggling doubt that sits in my gut like a tapeworm, burrowing deeper, refuses to let me have what I want: her . Rebuilding trust isn’t as simple as I thought. Despite confronting the pain in my past, I’m unable to move forward. I have no idea if I’ll ever trust Hailee, or any woman, again.
It wouldn’t be fair to keep her hanging, clinging to false hope. She deserves the chance to move forward too. Even though I walked out on her at Le Jardin, she hasn’t let go—Cora keeps me informed. It’s time for both of us to move on.
Hailee glides into the lounge, effortlessly commanding attention as she steps onto the stage to begin the introductions. Her black gown does little to hide the swell of her tits and the faint outline of her nipples. I down the last of my whiskey, swishing it around my mouth and swallowing it in one smooth gulp.
“Good evening, gentlemen…” I let her familiar introduction fade into the background, focusing instead on absorbing every detail. This will be my last visit to Eden, and I’m determined to imprint her image on my memory. Her lips, naturally pouty and soft; her long white-blonde hair, glittering like snow under the subdued lighting; and those radiant emerald eyes, sparkling brightly.
“It’s time to commence your selection.” Hailee’s soft voice pulls me from my thoughts. The token in my hand is marked with the number eight—almost last in line. One by one, men walk onto the stage, each choosing a goddess.
When it’s my turn, I stroll to the front of the room with a hand in my pocket, in no rush for this moment to end. Each step brings us closer, yet it’s also a step closer to the expiration of us . When our eyes meet, what shines back at me nearly brings me to my knees: understanding, compassion, regret. She knew I’d be in Le Jardin tonight; my name would’ve been on the register. I smile, hoping to convey how I wished things were different. Her expression, filled with love, only makes this moment that much harder.
I tear my eyes away and gesture to the nearest goddess—it doesn’t matter who I choose, they’re all the same if it’s not my kitten. Without looking back, I lead the goddess to suite eight. It’s time to move on.
Shutting the door behind us, I lean against it and blow out a deep breath. In front of me is a beautiful brunette, naked and kneeling in the middle of the bed, waiting for me. But she’s not the one I want. Not even my dick is on board. I stare at her, ready and willing to serve me, but there’s no movement whatsoever. Zilch. My cock knows it’s not Hailee and it’s punishing me. It only wants that leggy blonde, my bubbly ball of sunshine. I get it dude, I get it.
Closing my eyes, I sigh and tilt my head to the ceiling. What the fuck am I doing?
The words tumble out before I can stop them. “Listen,” I hear myself say, “this isn’t going to work. Sorry.”