Chapter 16 Robyn
“He’ll never admit it, but he cares about you more than you think… so don’t hurt him, his old heart can’t take it.”
I knew the moment I heard those whispered words from Sam, he knew.
I tried to keep my expression as unreadable as possible, but in that moment my own heart sped up with nerves I’m sure he could hear.
Not because I didn’t feel the same, but because I was surprised that within only a few hours of being around his friends, Sam noticed.
Throughout the evening I found myself only being more drawn to Jack. Seeing him so relaxed and open with his friends wasn’t at all like I expected him to be. A stark difference from the grumpy man I’d seen these past few days.
Jesus. Days, Robyn, how can you be feeling like this after such a short time?
The way he laughed and joked with them, how he was a completely different person altogether, even down to our physical contact being a lot more intimate than it usually is.
There were times his hand would rest on my thigh, twirling lazy circles with his fingers and sending the good kind of chills up my spine.
After the five of us had finished eating dinner, Jack draped his hand on the back of my neck, twirling individual strands of my hair as he and his friends caught up further with each other.
I started to feel things I know I shouldn’t, looking at him in ways I refused to accept because the moment I step foot out of this house…
it’s over between us. And that’s not to say I haven’t had fun with him, I have, there’s just no future for us afterwards.
Why are you even thinking like this?
Staying until Monday isn’t a good idea.
If it wasn’t so late, I’d leave now, but I literally have nowhere to go. So, I’m packing my case to leave for the airport in the morning—well, in around nine hours. If I stay longer than tonight… it will only be harder.
“He’ll never admit it, but he cares about you more than you think… so don’t hurt him, his old heart can’t take it.”
The same words Sam whispered to me keep running through my mind and I can’t get rid of them. The more I think about them the more I don’t want to go, but I know have to. I knew what this was a few days ago when he said it to me.
“When the snow thaws, little bird, it ends between us.”
And I plan to stick to it, no matter how I feel about him.
This is ridiculous. Crazy, even.
How can I fall for someone after only a few days. Shit like this doesn’t happen in real life, only in romance books and movies.
Sam was wrong.
He has to have been.
This is nothing more than sex.
Liar.
I remove tomorrow’s clothes and fresh underwear from my case, resting them on top of his dressing table and the moment I zip up my luggage, Jack walks into the bedroom and closes the door behind him.
I give him a half smile and before he has a chance to ask me why I’ve packed everything away, word vomit starts to erupt from my mouth.
“I figured since the snow’s thawed now, I should get going tomorrow, y’know…
instead of” —I clear my throat— “Monday. I just… I think it’ll be better, and I don’t know… ”
Easier.
I’m so busy trying to think of something to say I don’t notice him move from the door to stand directly in front of me. Jack cups my face with both hands, his gentle touch pulling me from my chaotic thoughts.
“If that’s what you want.” He presses his lips together, the look saying what he won’t verbalise. He’s disappointed. I can see it written all over his face.
“Unless you want me to leave now, I can—”
“Stay, Robyn, and if you want to leave in the morning… If that’s what you want, I won’t stop you.”
I swallow thickly, not sure what I want anymore. “This was supposed to be fun.” The words are so quiet I’m not sure I said them at all.
“Was it not?” The corner of his mouth curls up coyly, knowing the answer to that without me even having to say anything.
I don’t want it to end, but I also can’t tell him that.
His thumbs graze the apples of my cheeks simultaneously, my breath hitching with how gentle his touch feels now.
Nothing compared to how we have handled each other since the moment we agreed to…
whatever this is between us. “So beautiful,” he breathes serenely.
“Don’t do that.”
“Do what?” he asks.
“You’re not supposed to be—”
“To be what, baby?”
Fuck, why I can’t breathe.
As I stare into the bright green orbs of his eyes, I can feel myself becoming lost in the moment, my restraint swiftly leaving. I roll my lips together, wetting them slightly with my tongue before I speak. “Don’t call me that, either.” I can’t look away from him, it’s impossible.
Why is knowing I have to leave tomorrow so hard?
“You’re mine, Robyn.” Jack steps closer, a hairs width between both our chests now.
“Says who?” I murmur, transfixed by his sudden change in behaviour.
Lowering his left hand to the side of my neck, he brushes his thumb so lightly against my jawline I almost whimper at his touch. He brushes a few strands of hair from my face, tucking them behind my ear and smiling down at me as he does.
“Says the way you breathe. How your body reacts to me. That’s who, little bird.
” He angles his head lower, so our lips are barely touching, his closeness tempting me to rise up to my tiptoes and press my mouth to his, just to see what he tastes like.
But I think better of it and wait—kissing him would be a mistake.
It’s too intimate. Too… romantic.
His breath coasts along my desperate lips when he speaks again.
“I never knew what desire was until I touched you.” His voice now dripping with fervour, an intense tone that sends shivers over every inch of my skin.
“And now I know what it feels like to have you… I’m not sure I’m willing to give that up.
So, for however long I have left with you, I’ll call you whatever I want. So yes, Robyn, you’re mine.”
“You shouldn’t say things like that,” I murmur feebly, my lips so close to his.
“Why, baby?”
There’s that word again.
His words swirl with an intensified passion, and I can’t catch my breath. “Afraid you might like me? Or more?”
“No, I hate you.” I try to sound convincing, but I know it’s a lie. I’m pretty sure he knows it is, too.
An extremely slow smile grows on his face, and he dips his head to the side. “Then show me, Robyn, show me exactly how much you hate me.”
I’m unable to stop the words freefalling from. “Kiss me,” I murmur, “please.” My hands move to his wrists. “Before I change my mind.”
“Finally,” he rasps deep from the depths of his chest.
When we kiss, it’s not messy, or… chaotic, it’s tender.
Like both of us are pouring every ounce of what we feel for the other into it.
His hands hold my face while his lips slowly brush over mine, the stubble of his soft beard meeting my skin.
I move towards him, and even if there’s no space left between us it’s as though his body is a magnet beckoning mine closer.
I let go of his wrists, flattening my palms to his warm, muscular chest and sliding them up to his shoulders—but he still doesn’t let go of my face.
I poke my tongue out and flick it over his top lip, inciting a deep groan from him before he presses his mouth to mine, and I release a muffled moan into his mouth the moment I feel how soft his lips truly are.
Everything about this is warm, passionate, and I don’t know why I’m so drawn to him the way I am.
His tongue glides over the crease of my mouth, silently beckoning me to open up for him and when I do, he slides it inside, meeting mine in a kiss that could rival any period drama love story.
His kiss sends electricity through my body, igniting an unfamiliar feeling in my gut that has me briefly questioning why I’m allowing this to happen when it will only end in some form of heartbreak, but not being able to stop it, either.
As our tongues intertwine, I curl my fingers under the hem of his black T-shirt and lift it, our lips parting so I’m able to yank it off his incredible body and before our lips join once more, he lifts my sweater over my head and tosses it somewhere in the room, but as his lips fuse with mine again I’m lost within him once more.
Our breathing becomes a little more hitched as we share control of the kiss. He reaches behind my back and unclasps my bra, torturously working the straps over my shoulders, the tips of his fingers following them down my arms.
Jack bends slightly at the waist and takes hold of the underside of my thighs, hoisting me in his arms with minimal effort and I automatically wrap my arms tightly around his neck, bringing our bare upper bodies together.
The world around me melts away as he carries me to his bed, my fingers threading through his thick salt and pepper hair, him swallowing my various moans as he lowers us both down.
When my back rests on the soft silk mattress, I unlock my arms from his neck and my legs from his waist, allowing him to get to make light work of the button and zip on my jeans.
His mouth leaves mine and he laughs softly as a whimper of disappointment leaves me, because I don’t want to stop kissing him, I can’t. “Let me get these off.” He stands from his position above me.
“Hurry.” I sulk, down turning my lips into a sad expression and poking my bottom lip out.
“You really are greedy.” He chuckles, tugging off my jeans.
His smile is so beautiful to look at.
“Only for you,” I breathe, licking my lips to try and chase the remnants of his kiss.
I watch as he stands there for a few seconds, staring down at my naked form, taking every inch of me in as though this is the last time—and it is.
He’s looking at me with a level of adoration I’ve never experienced before, and I try my hardest to lock up the way it makes me feel to have his eyes on me like this.