Chapter 16
A Frank Conversation Between Anne and Charlotte
“Miss Lucas, thank you for agreeing to take a stroll with me through the gardens,” Anne said.
“It did seem you were quite intent on talking with me, though if it has anything to do with what happened—” Miss Lucas eased when Anne shook her head no. “Then I am at your disposal, Miss de Bourgh.”
“There is one aspect I want to discuss. It will break all rules of propriety, as we are only new acquaintances. But if we are to be dearest friends, and I know we shall, I ask you to call me Anne.” She felt Miss Lucas tense when she linked her arm through hers.
“While my curiosity is engaged, I am uncertain I can appreciate a conversation that ignores all rules of propriety.”
“But I mean to break them all,” Anne said with humor. “I promise, however, to stop speaking should you feel too scandalized.”
“True, we shall be friends. With this in mind, I invite you to call me Charlotte. I confess again, I am intrigued…Anne.”
Although her new friend stumbled over her Christian name, Anne clasped Charlotte’s arm to her side to show her appreciation for the concession.
“Charlotte, you must prepare for what I am to tell you… I have been married to Richard for these four years.”
Anne held fast to her arm when Charlotte attempted to pull away.
“Please, allow me to explain. Your attraction to my cousin was unavoidable, even had you known. It was instant, and may even be mutual, I would not presume to know. But, for my own sake, I am glad to know you. I understand you are an excellent friend.”
“I… I do not understand.”
“I would be shocked if you were not confused. My mother was adamant that I marry Darcy, but he is too stern and quiet, and I am too reticent. If he and I were to marry, we might exchange good morning and goodnight, but nothing else said between us each day for weeks on end.”
“There are worse circumstances,” said Charlotte.
“But I cannot bear an heir, which both Pemberley and Rosings Park require.”
Charlotte looked away with embarrassment.
“I know it is an intimate detail, but necessary for you to know the truth.”
“It is the hope of every man to have a son. I see my father’s pride in being able to give my brother Lucas Lodge. I cannot imagine the pride a master of Pemberley or Rosings Park might claim,” Charlotte said, cautious in her allowance for the continuing of this conversation.
“Indeed. But my marriage to Richard is…in name only. Our uncle Saul is an archbishop. The one request I ever made of him was to perform our ceremony. Once done, I could not marry Darcy.”
“True.”
“Richard has a safe in his room at Rosings Park where the papers are kept. If my mother had attempted to force Darcy’s hand these years while Richard had been away, I would have opened the safe.
But only if he or Darcy were present, so even if she had destroyed them, someone other than our uncle, who has many matters to consider for the church, would know the truth.
The marriage would have been exposed, and she would have given into a tirade the likes of which I never want to witness.
Still, there are times I considered telling my mother just to end her claims that I was to marry Darcy. ”
“I am certain it would cause you unimaginable heartbreak to lose one who is both a husband and your cousin in war.”
“Oh, I am not explaining myself well, so I shall resort to risking offense in favor of clarity. Richard will inherit. As a wife in name only, I asked him to be discreet while conducting any affairs in case our marriage must become known.”
“I am not certain I should be the one you discuss this with.”
“You are the one person with whom I wish to have this discussion. Do please agree to be by my side when I face my mother. In return, you will have your own apartment at Rosings. Decorate it to your preference. Live with me, help me manage her with the kindness I feel less inclined to show by the day. I will bequeath you my dowry upon my death. Whatever you choose to do once I am gone, you need never fear destitution. You can then live life on your terms. When Richard comes, we will enjoy our time all the more. Meals filled with wine and excellent conversation every evening he can spare with us. He is a consummate gentleman.”
“That is a great number of suppositions on your part,” Charlotte said with a thread of temper.
Anne understood her friend’s frustration, for this would upset many once it became known.
“Then I shall have Richard sign the annulment papers I have on hand at Rosings. My mother never ceases in her attacks, never compromises, always wants submission. I need someone who can advocate for me or explain why something must be, beyond just stating what she wants. Even my companion takes her part, given that my mother pays her salary.”
“Pardon?” This time, Charlotte was successful when she pulled away from Anne.
“My cousin was his ever-gallant self when he extended his protection and agreed to marry me. He did not know, does not know, I had already every intention of naming him my heir, but he will not mind that my dowry is to be yours. Rosings Park is mine. Everyone says I will live many years more, but I fear it untrue. To know Rosings is secure and my mother is to receive the best care which can be found, meaning yours, is what every heir must do,” Anne said.
Charlotte slipped her arm through Anne’s, and Anne accepted the simple kindness.
“Perhaps you could start at the beginning, Anne?”
“I have been alone these many, many years, but for the visits made by my cousins. Many times a day, my mother speaks of my impending marriage to Darcy but refuses to allow me to learn any duties a mistress should know. I love my cousin Darcy. Now that I am older, I understand he protected us both when he gave me the slightest acknowledgment in her presence. Mother would have taken any attention as encouragement. When I was younger, I was certain he hated me. It was Richard, it was ever just Richard, who allayed my fears.”
“You are fortunate for their company. In the little time I have spent in his presence, Mr. Darcy is an excellent gentleman,” said Charlotte.
“I now know my cousin Darcy to be the best of men. That Easter visit, when my mother’s demands were so forceful I feared he might give in, I went to the conservatory.
Richard came to find me. I begged him to marry me before he left with his regiment, though I did not think he would agree.
To my greatest relief, he understood my desperation.
No heiress wants to be forced into a marriage she did not look upon with any pleasure. I was certain Darcy disliked me.”
“That would have been difficult, but any mother would wish to claim Colonel Fitzwilliam for a son.”
“Mine would not. She is officious in the extreme and may attempt to throw me off my estate. In marrying Darcy, I would not usurp her position as mistress of Rosings. She is cold, demanding, and single-minded. It is her happiness she considers. My enjoying the estate my father left me is not in line with her wishes,” Anne said, unable to conceal her pique.
“I am sorry for your disharmony and her lack of consideration.”
“Mr. Collins is her new pet. She makes him desperate to know her approbation, revels in his supplication. After a period of time, she allows him to believe he is in her good graces until she wishes to repeat the cycle, so she knows his will is hers to bend,” Anne explained bitterly.
“His visit to Longbourn was brief.”
Anne straightened. “I ask from you a great deal in keeping my confidence. But it was not Darcy who protected me. Nor was it my uncle who saw me three times throughout my life. It was not my aunt who came to check on me. Her letters, sent every other month, are cursory at best, nearly identical to those she sends Ana when they are not in London. Why? Because she knows nothing of me. Nor was it Sebastian, their son and heir, currently the viscount. I met him the day my father’s will was read.
I was the sole heir, but I was not allowed to attend the reading.
“It was Richard. At but fifteen, Richard informed my mother that if she ever had me bled again, he would express to his father that she needed to be remitted to Bedlam, as the it was not helping me. It was Richard who inquired after me, ensuring I had the freedom of fresh air in a phaeton. And though on his own fields of battle, it was Richard who wrote me letters with regard to my interests, the single other person who ever cared to learn them beyond Georgiana.”
By the time she was done, Anne’s chest was heaving, and she struggled to draw breath. But she saw understanding in Miss Lucas, and that was a welcome change.
“I am grieved for you.”
“Georgiana, dear Georgiana. She tries so hard to know me at his encouragement, but I keep her at a distance. Richard knows it is to protect her from my mother but hopes I will relieve our mutual loneliness. Lady Catherine went to Pemberley the day after my uncle Darcy died to take her from her home, intending to act as her guardian so that my cousin felt beholden enough to her so would wed me.”
“I am saddened that you know such circumstances and loneliness.”
“Perhaps you now understand why I leave Rosings Park to Richard and no other. While he is an intelligent man, he is not presumptuous. I think he would protest if I were to tell him my intentions. But it is done, and it is done for the best.”
“As he genuinely cares about you, I cannot fault your choice.”
“Now, we start again,” Anne said. “I see you are surprised at the quickness with which I regain my composure.
When one lives with Lady Catherine, one learns to mask or correct one's expressions as quickly as possible to avoid being berated. One cannot have a differing opinion, nor react to any contrivances my mother wishes to throw tantrums over any given day, you see.”