Chapter 3 #2
“You were gossiping about them with Miss Bingley over tea and coffee this morning. They spoke of you when I met them over tea. I expect you to tell me it is untrue. I expect you to say your promises mattered. I expect you to have meant it when you said I could make a friend, one I chose, rather than be in the exclusive company of a woman who uses me to her purpose. What I did not expect was to hear my brother, not once but twice, slighted a lady who had no cause to be slighted.”
“You go too far,” Darcy said, his eyes narrowing with the warning.
“Do I? I suppose only your opinion matters. And everyone should see all things as you do. But just how is that possible when you tell me nothing? How was I to know Mr. Wickham was not to be trusted? Or that I should have informed you or Richard if I crossed paths with him? How does anyone know what you think if you will not tell us anything?”
Fat tears rolled down her cheeks unchecked. He reached into his pocket to retrieve his handkerchief, extending it to her, though she worked to calm herself.
Darcy had never been so humbled in all his life. That it was at the hands of his sister, ten years his junior, was astonishing enough. That it was a truth he ignored for his convenience was humiliating.
“You are correct, Ana. I would not want everyone to think as I do. It would make for dull conversation. And I would not have you speaking or thinking of others as Miss Bingley does. I would know disappointment in myself if you were to emulate her. Above even that, I should have told you that Wickham was not to be trusted.”
“Thank you. Now, tell me I heard wrong. Tell me you did not look down on all those at the assembly. There are landed gentlemen in this society. I am certain Mr. Bingley said so at dinner last night.” Georgiana dried her cheeks.
“I do not know,” Darcy said in confession. “When we walked in, talk of our fortunes was rampant. I was angry at hearing my value bandied about.”
“You have claimed talk of your fortune from the first time you attended a ball. Tell who spoke viciously, as you complain about in Town. Tell me who tried to entrap you, which you claim occurs a few times each year. Tell me the cause of your disdain so I might understand why you acted in the way you did.”
“None of that occurred,” Darcy said with some concession.
“I then conclude it an evening similar to the better nights you have been out in London, yet you acted in the same condescending manner Lady Catherine would?”
Georgiana crossed her arms while waiting, her brow raised in expectation of a list. Her eyes narrowed the longer she was forced to await his reply.
It was an echo of their mother’s expectation that he would explain why he had committed some misdeed.
He swallowed around the lump in his throat, one formed from the emotions that surged with the thought.
“They are all below me in status.”
“Yet, if they are the families of gentlemen, they are above the Bingleys. You treated Miss Bingley with greater courtesy than those born of a higher status than she?”
His throat tightened when he first attempted to answer. Here again, she had exposed behavior he would have admonished her for.
“Yes, I failed to keep my promises, Ana. But Miss Bennet will make you an excellent friend. You will see.”
“We agreed I could choose my friend from amongst the young ladies here.”
“Is it safe to enter my study?” Bingley peeked in from the doorway. “A tempest whirled through the sitting room twenty-six minutes ago, and I do not wish to draw her ire.”
“Safe is uncertain, but please do join me.” Darcy motioned toward the chair on his left so they both faced Georgiana behind Bingley’s desk. “My sister takes me to task for breaking my word given yesterday.”
Darcy explained his sister’s hopes to make a friend and his promises on how to achieve it.
Bingley whistled through his teeth. “You failed rather spectacularly, my friend. You insulted Miss Elizabeth without provocation. She was sitting down, but there were four young ladies to every man willing to dance last night.”
“She heard your insult, Brother, and you hurt her exceedingly. Miss Elizabeth was sitting out so that other ladies could enjoy an opportunity to dance.”
“And Miss Bennet said it was her turn to excuse herself from dancing after Miss Elizabeth. I was unable to claim another set until the last,” Bingley said.
“Still, Miss Charlotte pulled Miss Elizabeth aside today, suggesting explanations for your twice slighting Miss Elizabeth, so she would not be so hurt. I would give a great deal to have a friend who would offer such ready comforts and tell me when I am foolish but not condemn or gossip about me for it,” Georgiana said, her longing unmistakable.
“I did not insult her.”
“You professed an unwillingness to dance when Miss Elizabeth asked if you enjoyed the activity,” Bingley said out of the side of his mouth.
“During my first set with her, Miss Bennet inquired if there was something she might do to make you feel more welcome after seeing how abrupt you acted with her dearest sister.”
“That was Elizabeth Bennet?” Darcy felt his head rear back, the revelation unwelcome.
“It was. The same Elizabeth Bennet you insulted for sitting down and claiming her not handsome enough to tempt you.”
Darcy could hear accusation in Bingley’s second rebuke. Well-deserved, considering how great the insult he had cast at Gardiner’s niece. But Georgiana heard the words he had spoken.
“Brother!” Georgiana’s expression was aghast.
“Thank you, Bingley,” Darcy drawled.
“Do you agree the ladies would not know who I was when we met in Meryton?”
“Had they, they would have been even more intrusive in their discussion,” Darcy said with derision.
“Let me clarify three points on which you are wrong, Brother.
One, Miss Bennet is all that is gracious.
Their mother wants her daughters to have some kind of security because of an entail.
Still, you will find neither Miss Bennet nor Miss Elizabeth to be fortune hunters.
Neither will marry without love or, at least, esteem.
Miss Charlotte and Miss Mary are more pragmatic, asserting that consideration of wealth is necessary to ensure that their family will not struggle to eat or find shelter.
“Two, Miss Bennet is known to be the sweetest of ladies.
I saw evidence of this even in her reprimands.
Despite her sisters' teasing, she denies that you are her Mr. Bingley.
I suspect she does not wish to raise hopes, either her own or those of others.
She spoke in tones more indicating hope than denial.
I declare you will find few who know equal graciousness.
“And three, gentlemen, is this. Though the youngest sisters are not tempered and act indecorously, I would dare anyone to insult their family. They are sisters. I would give a great deal to claim any of them as friends.”
“I would hope, under my influence, they would have proper comportment,” Darcy scoffed.
“My point is, I would have had someone lively to laugh with. Someone to keep me from acting irrationally, be with me in my moments of joy. I would not have suffered loneliness and would never have been so foolish. Tell me what harm they caused?”
Darcy stayed silent. In that light, he could no longer deny being in the wrong.
“I see. Is it better if someone attempts to compromise you, or grasps at your unoffered arm? You seek a woman who feigns sincerity to gain your approval? Should I seek those ladies who calculate how low they might bend to gift men a better view of the swells of their breasts? I must be disagreeable indeed, owning my own opinion then.”
“You go too far,” Darcy ground out through his clenched jaw. “You know I value none of what you describe.”
“Yet, in a room filled with people excited over newcomers to their society, you disdained the one who asked if you liked to dance? What would you do if it were I who was so insulted?”
“I—” Darcy found himself at an utter loss for words.
“Because she has no brother to protect her, is it acceptable to insult her publicly?” Georgiana asked, her tone gentling when she recognized she had, at last, shaken him.
“No.”
“I am glad you agree. We will go to Longbourn, and you will apologize this afternoon. You would expect it of anyone who acted the same toward me or Miss Bingley. And though I saw enough of Miss Elizabeth’s character to suspect she would accept any apology, she deserves better than perfunctory words.
Mr. Bingley, I presume you wish to spend more time with Miss Bennet.
Everything I witnessed and heard her say supports the notion that she is everything lovely. Do come with us.”
“I will be ready in minutes, Ana,” Bingley said.
“Excellent. One last thing? Inform Miss Bingley you intend never to make her an offer of marriage, Brother. I fear her interference when you decide to pursue someone you find worthy of your affection.”
“True, Caroline can know no hope in your quarter that she might seek her future elsewhere,” Mr. Bingley said.
“You have always said you would consider a woman who cared not a whit for your fortunes or connections, Brother.
One who saw in you the man you truly are.
I wish you luck. Your road to being worthy of such a woman is longer than I believed this morning.
Gentlemen, I will meet you in ten minutes in the entrance hall.
“That young lady is a fearsome thing to behold, Darcy. She will make you keep your word. You have done well in raising her. She is upset because you were unkind to Miss Elizabeth and those of the neighborhood. My sister is unkind to all unless they have a title or she knows they belong to the first circles,” Bingley said, patting his shoulder.
“I do not intend to be late to meet her at the door, for then your sister might scold me.”
Darcy rubbed his eyes, then ran his palms down his face.
He did not know if he appreciated this side of his sister, but he loved that she had taken him to task for his bad behavior.
His memory of their mother was of a woman who would face down any man with but the sheer strength of her will and truth on her side.
He had acted opposite to the way a gentleman should and had insulted a woman who had done no wrong.
His actions had been unworthy of the Darcy name.
Having always believed his parents were watching over him and his sister, Darcy was filled with despondency.
If true, they had witnessed his behavior. His conscience filled with shame.
His sister’s question of what he would do if a man spoke to and of her with such condescension before any, let alone all their family, friends, and neighbors?
It required no contemplation. He would give the one spouting such of his sister the cut direct.
That same man would be fortunate to escape his cousin’s fists once her other guardian heard of it.
It was what he deserved, but the Miss Bennets had no brother. Where was the lady’s father the previous evening? More, why had he not come that morning to demand satisfaction?
Speculating that his status in the first circles was the cause of the man's inaction, He felt all the worse.
While Darcy believed it would not matter to him what rank or status a man had if they slighted his daughter, he was aware that not all men could afford the same opinion.
It was, therefore, up to him to render an apology.
He knew he should not, rather, could not expect Miss Elizabeth to be so charitable as to forgive him since he had shown none. Still, Darcy prayed he might gain it. And not just because his sister would be there to bear witness.
Georgiana was correct in every way regarding his behavior.
If she was also correct about Miss Bennet, he hoped he had not damaged Bingley’s prospects.
And while the woman Georgiana described as Miss Elizabeth matched everything he claimed would be the sort of woman who would suit him in essentials, he did not leave the study with any hope of redemption.