37. Chapter Thirty-Seven
Chapter Thirty-Seven
C ody had crashed in Brooke’s bed. Again. Another long workday. Another night thinking about Brooke and a future without her that had him dreaming about her. Only this time, things turned dark.
Kristi was holding his hand as he tried to reach for Brooke, who stood just out of reach of him, facing a bright, sun-filled horizon, while Kristi stood behind him, a turbulent storm approaching.
Even in the dream he understood the imagery. If he was with Brooke, he’d be happy. If he stayed with Kristi, he’d forever be fighting to get to Brooke and living in a storm of emotions and a life fraught with conflicting feelings about Kristi.
They were good together, but their relationship wasn’t easy. He was forever trying to be what she needed him to be and falling short in her eyes. With Brooke, he could simply be himself.
Both of them loved him for who he was.
But Brooke loved him as is.
Kristi wanted him to be more and do more. He tried. But in doing so, he failed because it was never enough.
The cold hard truth was that Kristi fit him and his life in many ways, but she wasn’t the woman he loved and wanted to be with forever.
Over the last many months it had become clear he and Kristi could have a good marriage. One built on mutual appreciation and support of the other. But that would only take them so far and make the things lacking between them more obvious and necessary. The marriage would fall apart, leaving them both bitter, more than likely.
And it would be his fault because he loved another. More than anything.
Kristi felt it. She knew it.
Both of them had spent the past six months ignoring it.
He couldn’t do that anymore. Not when he felt this emptiness growing inside him. Not when the closer it came to Brooke graduating and coming home, the more he thought about what a life with her could be like.
Not when he woke up from that dream of him trying desperately to escape Kristi’s grasp, so he could grab hold of Brooke and hold on to her forever in the light and warmth and love she offered that left him with her name on his lips and tattooed on his heart and soul.
He knew what he needed to do.
Maybe Brooke had someone else. Maybe she didn’t anymore. He didn’t know. All he knew was that he needed to go after Brooke, tell her that he loved her, and only her, and do whatever it took to get her back.
I can’t live without her.
She’s mine.