Chapter Three
BF: I trust there are no recyclable items inside?
Male: Of course!
BF: So no wine bottles in there? There weren’t any last week either and that’s unusual for your house.
Male: I’ve really cut back on drinking.
BF: Your wife certainly hasn’t. When I informed her yesterday that your grass had grown past regulation height, she was sloshing back a large glass of red when she asked me to “Go measure my dick, not her lawn.”
Male: (Laughter.) She has a great sense of humor.
BF: I’m keeping my eye on you both.
Previous investigation of their bin confirmed household waste (including two empty boxes of Maltesers, one empty Ben and Jerry’s Phish Food carton and four wine bottles).
Note—BF spotted observing their house on three different occasions and writing notes in black notepad. Potential problem.