31. A Long Month
A Long Month
Theo knew he was scowling, which was not his most attractive expression, but he couldn’t help it. “This is dumb.”
Dae gave him his seventh Theo-sigh that morning. “It’s only for a month.”
He almost kicked the suitcase sitting by the front door, but showed incredible restraint for a guy whose boyfriend was moving out. “You love that I hate this.”
The corners of Dae’s lips crinkled in his attempt to not-smile. “A little bit, yes.”
When Dae got a job as a language consultant on a movie, Theo brushed off the fact that they provided housing.
It didn’t apply to Dae, since they lived seven subway stops away from the shoot.
It took every mature cell in Theo’s body (so, not many) not to have a nervous breakdown when Dae told him he’d be taking it.
Dae’s reason, he had assured him an absurd amount of times, was that it was actually beneficial for him to be there for the late-night shoots and script rewrites.
And that it would be good for their relationship, too, since they’d never been apart.
When Theo practically screamed the word, Korea, he’d amended that they'd never been apart since they were together, which was a sentence that hurt his brain.
Theo stood in front of the door. “What if you fall in love with a sexy actor?”
“Then I’ll invite you to the wedding.”
“What if Stairway Bill hits on me again?”
“Then you’ll invite me to the wedding. Though,” Dae said thoughtfully, “Stairway Bill strikes me as someone who would want a small service. Something tasteful.”
It was evening, usually about the time they’d settle onto the couch, Theo snuggling into the crook of Dae’s neck to watch whatever nonsense they’d settled on.
Sure, they were stuck in something others might call a rut, but Theo liked their rut.
It was a cozy rut. He didn’t want anything messing with their rut!
He huffed. “Don’t go. I’ll miss you.”
“Yes, Theo. That’s the point.” Dae secured the last button on his jacket like that was it—the deciding button. Once it was done up, there was no going back. “I’ll miss you too, which again, is the point.”
Theo wrapped his arms around his middle and pulled him close, breathing him in. “You have to call me every night.”
A nod. “Deal.”
“And send me pictures.”
“Of landscapes?” Theo squeezed aggressively hard and Dae grunted. “Okay. Selfies. Got it.”
“With your shirt off.”
He squashed his smile, which only happened these days when he was trying to hide his amusement in favour of pretending to be annoyed. “Theo.”
“Those are my terms.”
He put his hand on Theo’s neck and pulled him in for a soft kiss, using his lips to tell him everything was okay.
Theo knew, logically, that this was nothing to be upset about.
It was a month. Dae would be seven subway stops away.
He didn’t even have to change lines. But Theo had been floating-on-sunshine-swinging-on-lampposts-over-the-moon levels of happy for a year, and he didn’t want anything threatening that.
Dae’s lips moved from his mouth to his cheek, then settled over his ear. “I love you,” he whispered, sending a shiver through Theo’s body.
“I love you,” he croaked back.
It was going to be a long month.
??? ???
wheres the closest public bathroom to our apartment
Perfect Dae
Why? What’s wrong with the bathroom?
theres a fly
So kill it.
cant
went into the toilet and disappeared
its one of those small ones i cant see
A fruit fly?
maybe?
You’re going to use the disgusting bathroom at Tim Hortons because there’s a possible fruit fly in the toilet?
tim hortons is the closest?
Theo.
It probably flew away.
theres no way to know
Just flush the toilet!
it can FLY dae
It’s not even a bug that bites. It can’t do anything to you.
what if it flies up my butt
The fruit fly is not going to fly up your butt.
oh so now ur a fly mind reader
my butt could look like the perfect place to settle down and lay eggs
I don’t think fruit flies lay eggs in butts.
‘I don’t think’ isn’t helping i need assurances
Okay, let’s indulge this ridiculous idea. Even if it did, they take time to grow. You would poo them out before that happened.
what if I had a lot of cheese?
You dont know my life
I do know your life.
You’re very regular.
come slay the beast
Theo put on his best pout and sent him a selfie. Dae sent back a picture of a flyswatter.
brat
You’re right. I’m the brat.
He followed that with a shirtless selfie, as per their agreement, with his hand in his hair and a bedroom smoulder.
delete that immediately
its for my eyes only
Too late. I’ve already sent it to all the sexy actors.
MY EYES ONLY
Your eyes only, Theo.
Always.
I love you a lot
I love you a lot.
Go to the bathroom.
??? ???
Jordan’s laughter knocked her onto Céline like a thrown spaghetti noodle and she slapped her leg, tearing up. Avery’s joke had been amusing, but it didn’t deserve a full meltdown.
Jordan had asked them to collaborate for her next single, and they’d gathered in Theo’s apartment to brainstorm and jam.
Not that Theo could provide anything other than snacks and praise, but his place was the most central, and he loved watching musical babies being born.
The session had dissolved into hanging out, and Theo had cracked the bottle of wine he’d won at an agency raffle, so everyone was purple-tongued and rosy.
“Wait, wait, wait, what was that guy’s name again?” Jordan’s voice boomed. “The one who kept proposing to Trisha?”
Avery let out a dreamy sigh. “He had the prettiest ponytail.”
“Gavin,” Caleb said. “I didn’t know he proposed to Trisha, but I remember that ponytail.”
“It was a thing of beauty,” Jordan sighed wistfully.
Theo was jealous he never got to behold the apparently majestic ponytail.
“Trisha moved, by the way.” Avery scooped a healthy amount of cheese dip without breaking the cracker. Girl had skills. “She and her wife live in Cabbagetown now.”
“We should invite them over!” Jordan scrambled for her phone and attempted to send a text while they laughed at how many tries it took to get it right.
Theo checked his own blank phone, feeling as happy and bubbly as he could when part of his heart was missing. It had been a week, and he still wasn’t used to sleeping without Dae. He wasn’t looking forward to when his friends would go home, and he’d have to crawl into an empty bed.
“Did you get the new Bob is Not Your Neighbour sticker? I have an extra, if you want.” Caleb handed Theo a sticker with two cactus-like aliens with their needles stuck into each other and the caption, Guess it’s fate.
Theo had pitched the caption, Get to the point, but Dae vetoed it. “Cute.”
“Yeah, have you noticed the pictures seem…” He drummed his hands on his knees. “What’s the word?”
“Happier?” Avery said. “More hopeful too. I think Bob might be going to therapy or something.”
“Yeah.” Theo contained his smile with Herculean effort. “Or something.”
His phone buzzed and Dae’s face popped up on his screen—his contact photo still the same rosy-cheeked drunk teenager it had been since their first year of university.
“Go.” Jordan pushed his shoulder. “Take it.”
Theo closed his bedroom door and swiped to answer the call, but Dae didn’t appear on his screen, so he put the phone to his ear like they were in the nineties. What would be next, twirling the phone cord?
“Dae?”
“You’re not allowed to die before me.”
A perfectly normal greeting. “You can’t decree something like that.”
“I just did, though, and it’s binding.” His voice was sleepy. A bit raspy. Sexy.
Theo crawled onto the bed and flopped onto his back, staring up at the ceiling. “Then you have to eat more refined sugar or something, because there’s no way my heart is outlasting yours. You jazzercise every day…”
“CrossFit.”
“So it’s just not logistically possible.”
“You could exercise more.”
“Who’s to say a meteor won’t crash into the gym.
It’s probably safer not to go.” Theo pictured him in a hotel room wearing the comfy pajamas he’d packed, lying on a bed made with tight hospital corners.
He wanted to touch him. “This is a weird conversation we’re having.
Why are you suddenly worried about my death? Did Halmoni have another dream?”
Dae’s grandma had prophetic dreams. Not, like, you will meet a tall dark stranger kind of bullshit, but spooky specific stuff like, you’re going to bruise your tailbone and need to sit on a donut pillow for two weeks. Which he did. It was very embarrassing. He still had the donut pillow.
“No.” Dae sighed heavily into the phone, and Theo felt it in his chest. “The movie I’m working on is sad. This guy’s wife dies and—”
“Whoa! Spoilers!”
“You’re never going to watch this movie.”
“Why?”
“It’s just very…French.”
“Hey, I’m cultured.”
Guitar notes floated from the living room, and Jordan and Avery’s voices harmonized words he couldn’t make out. The song was upbeat but mournful. Perfect for this conversation, apparently.
“It’s about a man who finds out at his wife’s funeral that she had multiple lesbian affairs.”
“Ohhhh, juicy.”
“He cuts off his penis in some kind of retaliation against her ghost, who haunts their garden and makes their vegetables grow with maggots in them.”
“Ah. Well.” There was absolutely no way he would ever watch that movie. “Could be a lazy Sunday afternoon watch.”
“Promise me.”
“Fine. I’ll watch the penis-magot movie.”
“That you’ll never die, Theo.” His voice had an intensity Theo hadn’t realized the conversation warranted. “You can live without me; I can’t live without you.”
Theo barked with laughter. “In what world is that true? I could barely handle you going seven subway stops away for a month, and you think I can live without you?”
“Then let’s die together, same day, same time, eighty years from now.”
“Sure, you jump, I jump, Jack.” He thought about it, trying to do math with his wine-logged brain. “Eighty years would make us one hundred and seven.”
“Yeah. You should probably stop eating sugar.”