Chapter 27 #2
“All right. Last weekend in the Shadowlands, Anne and I planned to discuss our relationship.”
Z nodded, unsurprised.
“We didn’t.” Ben sipped his drink, unsure how much to say. “I saw her back with Joey and lost my temper. Told her I was done.”
Jessica’s eyes widened, but she didn’t say anything.
“That seems unlike you.” Gaze on Ben, Z pulled Jessica closer and put his arm under the baby for added support.
“Maybe. But we’d been…” Ben rubbed his unshaven face. “I’d told her a few days before that I wasn’t a slave. She wanted to think about it. We were going to talk that night.”
“Ah.” Z eyed him. “She said she was taking Joey back instead?”
“I didn’t give her a chance to talk—but yeah, that’s about right. Only now I think I might have fucked up.”
Jessica’s snort sounded like a sneeze.
Ben glanced at her. “You got something to add, blondie?”
“She wouldn’t go back to Joey. He’s a heavy masochist and she…well, she’s not that sadistic any longer. She told me that.” Jessica shook her head. “Could you have misread the situation?”
When Ben had called, Joey hadn’t had a clue where Anne was. Had seemed surprised that anyone thought he would.
Did I pull the trigger without taking in all the details? He scowled at the table. No problem bringing up the image burned into his brain. Anne bending down to Joey, his chin cupped in her hand, looking into his face…for fucking ever.
But that was all Ben had seen, really. A long look. Had his own insecurity made him read more into the body language? “Maybe I…was hasty.”
“If you made a mistake, you’ll talk to her, whether she wants to or not, even if you have to tackle her at her workplace,” Z said with no doubt in his voice. “I can’t imagine you doing less.”
“Roger that.”
Z lifted his eyebrows, silently asking what advice he wanted.
“There’s more information you need to know.” Ben felt his gut clench. “Earlier that night, she’d fought with her family and then quit her job, too.”
“Nooo.” Jessica shook her head. “She loves her job. And her family.”
“Yeah. And that’s the problem. No one—family or friends—has seen her since she left the Shadowlands that night. Have you?” He looked at Z.
“I haven’t heard from her, no.” Z gazed at the darkness outside the lanai. “She’s strong, but her heart leaves her vulnerable. How many blows can she take before breaking?”
A delayed realization dumped guilt on Ben’s shoulders. If she hadn’t taken Joey back, then…one of those blows could have come from him. What the fuck had he done?
“And Cullen said…” Jessica pressed her hand to her mouth, tears in her eyes. “That’s not fair; she’s had too much.”
“Shhh, little one.” Z lifted his wife and daughter into his lap, pulling them close.
“What did Cullen say?” Ben asked.
Z shook his head. “Cullen apparently thought the same thing you did, that she’d left you for Joey. He was angry on your behalf.”
“Jesus, I don’t need help.” Had Cullen come down on her when she was hurting and pissed off? “Is that where she is? In jail for leaving bloody chunks of a dick-headed, dumbass Master all over the bar top?”
“Benjamin.” Z’s voice was dry. “Before Anne returns, you might work on the respectful language considered appropriate for a submissive.”
As long as she returned, he might do that.
Z stroked Jessica’s hair. “I wish Anne had reacted with violence. Instead, she quit.”
“Quit what?”
The lines beside Z’s mouth deepened. “She terminated her membership. And, yes, I’ve tried to reach her with no success.”
She quit the Shadowlands? The sinking feeling in Ben’s chest was new, as if his heart had bottomed out. What the fuck was she thinking, cutting every tie she had? Was she crazy?
No, but she had a hell of a temper when she actually let it loose.
She’d worked her ass off to be an outstanding fugitive recovery agent and Mistress. To have everything she’d built questioned by idiots like her uncles and father. And Cullen. Hell, he couldn’t blame her for blowing her stack.
Travis said she tended to retreat when wounded. But she wouldn’t stay away from her family and friends. Not long. “She’ll be back to her friends—and the Shadowlands—when she’s ready. Anne doesn’t lack courage.”
If she was all right.
She had to be all right. “When she returns…” Ben hesitated. “Z, I’ve seen you step in when things get fucked up. Will you help out?”
“No,” Z said gravely.
Both Ben and Jessica stared at him.
“Benjamin, you have all the talent and determination required to see this through. Whether you two part ways or not, I know you’ll support her until she’s steady again.” Z’s smile was fleeting. “Whether she wants you to or not.”
“She won’t,” Ben muttered. But, dammit, if she needed help, he’d see she got it. And she’d take that help, like it or not.
Although, it’d be easier on him to simply kill everyone who’d hurt her. He’d start with her cousin. Meantime, he had to find her. “I’m going to have Ghost take over the desk this weekend. Okay with you?”
Z nodded. “Of course.”
Ben finished off his beer and rose. “Sorry to have cut into your evening, Jessica. I’ll get out of your way now.”
“I’m glad you came by,” she said. “I’ll talk to the other Shadowkittens and try to give you some ideas.”
“Thanks.” As he let himself out, he saw her turn and bury her head against Z’s chest.
Anne had done that too, taken comfort from Ben. Had made him feel needed and powerful, as if he could keep the world from harming his woman.
Fuck, he missed her.