10. Artez
The soulful melody of a love song hummed through the Bluetooth speaker while I scrambled eggs. Since the date with Mali last night, I felt like a new man. I woke up with a new joy in my heart. Something told me we would transition out of the friend zone soon.
“What’s got you singing like we’re in a nineties movie?” Mama asked as she entered the kitchen. “And you’re cooking? Oh, the world must be ending.”
A laugh filled the air. “Chill on me, Mama. I can’t cook us some breakfast?”
“Artez, you don’t even wake up for breakfast on your off days. This is foreign to me.” She examined the food as I distributed the scrambled eggs on two plates. The full meal included the eggs, crispy shredded hashbrowns, and thick cut hickory smoked bacon with the perfect crunch.
“Times are changing, Mama.” I kissed her cheek and grabbed our plates to sit at the table. She followed me with two glasses of ice-cold orange juice. We said a quick grace before we ate in a comfortable silence for a few moments.
“Who is she?”
“Ma’am?” I looked up from my plate to see her staring at me.
“You’re your father’s son, Artez. He was a very romantic man too. He would hum and whistle songs just like that. Who has my baby boy smitten?”
I laughed. “Nobody says smitten these days.”
“Well, it perfectly describes your action.”
“Her name is Mali. We’re taking things slow, but I have a feeling you’ll meet her soon.”
Mama’s face lit up. “I’m so happy to hear that. I feared you’d fall into the curse of the provider.”
I raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean?”
“Some people who take on the role of provider lose themselves while caring for those they love. They give everything to their loved ones and neglect themselves in the process. It’s why so many self-appointed caregivers often fall into a health crisis of their own when their loved ones pass.”
“Hold on now, woman. You tryna leave me here alone with Alana’s hardheaded ass? “
“Not too much on my daughter now. But seriously, Tez. You show up for me, Alana, and the boys naturally. I’m happy to see you letting someone come in and love you in a way your family can’t.”
“I don’t know how far it’s going to go, honestly. I’m letting her set the pace, but she told me no man has ever made her feel the way I make her feel, and that shit got to me, Mama. I think I’m . . . falling in love.”
“Aww!” Mama placed a hand on her heart and cooed.
“Chill.” I chuckled and finished the last couple bites on my plate before I sat back and smiled.
“Look at that goofy grin on your face. You’re gonna give me more grandbabies. I can’t wait.”
“Slow ya roll, Mama. I ain’t said nothing about kids.”
“You didn’t have to. A grandmother knows. I’m going to call it now: Y’all will have three kids, a dog, two cats, and a weird pet I’m not going to want to touch.”
I let out a laugh deep from the pit of my stomach. “Mama, you got to chill. Why you think my kids gon’ have a weird pet?”
“You had weird shit back in the day. Remember that weird-ass water thing?” she asked.
I raised a brow as I tried to remember what she was referring to. I had fish, a turtle, a parrot, and— “Oakley the Axolotl. My boy could play Tic Tac Toe and everything. Damn, I miss my dawg.”
We shared a laugh as Alana, Jordyn, and Jadyn walked into the room.
“Hi, Nana and Uncle Tez,” the boys said in unison.
“Hey, y’all,” I replied.
“No breakfast for us? I wasn’t even expecting you to be up this early.”
“I cook for who’s awake. You know, ain’t that what you told me?”
“Touché.” She went into the kitchen to feed her and the boys while Mama and I continued to talk about my old pets. It was funny recalling some moments in the Gillam household. My pops was strict as hell, but Mama balanced it out.
“Boys, can y’all go into the living room with your cereal so I can talk to Nana and Uncle Tez?” Alana asked as she walked over to the dining room table and sat down next to Mama.
The boys walked their bowls into the living room, and the low buzz of cartoons followed shortly after. Once all eyes were on her, her bottom lip quivered.
“Mama . . .”
“Oh dear, what’s going on, puddin’?”
She twiddled with her nails for a few moments, sniffling and building suspense.
“Lana, hurry. What’s going on? Somebody hurt you?” The protective brother instincts kicked in, and my leg bounced up and down in anticipation.
“I don’t want you to be upset with me, Tez.”
Alarms went off in my head. “What happened?”
“I peed on a stick this morning.”
“Oh dear.” Mama gasped. “What did the test say, baby?”
“I’m . . . I’m pregnant.”
I slammed my hand on the dining room table, making the plates rattle and both Mama and Alana jump.
“Damn, Alana. What the fuck you gon’ do with another kid?”
“Artez, please calm down.”
“No, Mama. I will not be calm. She’s just now getting back on her feet after the last nigga left her high and dry with twins.”
Alana burst into tears. Her shoulders shook as deep sobs filled the air. Mama stood up and comforted her, but I couldn’t. I thought she would have learned from the last time she got pregnant by an ain’t-shit nigga. Since I hadn’t met this new man, he probably wasn’t shit either.
“I didn’t want you to be upset with me, Tee. I’m the big sister, and I should know better than to go through the same cycle again. I should have been more careful. I know, and I’m so, so sorry.”
Alana crumbled in front of me. She buried her face in her hands and sobbed. I let out a breath. The anger dissipated instantly. I stood up and took Mama’s place beside my sister. I held her while she cried against my stomach.
“I’m so sorry, Tee.”
“You good, crybaby. I got you through whatever. You know that. I just hate we got to go through this again.”
“Maybe I’ll fetus deletus this baby and keep our lives the way it is. I don’t want to add any more stress to you or Mama’s lives.”
“Do what you feel is right for you and your body.” I gave her head a comforting pat.
“We support whatever you decide,” Mama finished.
Alana wiped at the corners of her eyes and let out a deep breath. “I don’t want to tell the guy until I go to the doctor to get my first ultrasound and decide what I want to do.”
“That’s a good idea. He’ll definitely have questions. You’ll be okay, puddin’,” Mama responded.
My phone buzzed in my pocket. I pulled it out and stepped away from the table as I read the text message from Captain Moore.
CAP:
All hands on deck.
I liked the message.
“I’m getting called into work. I love y’all. Keep your head up, Lannie.” I kissed Mama on the cheek before I headed up the stairs to get ready for work.
I could have handled the conversation better, but my emotions were high.
I was by my sister’s side, taking her to appointments, buying diapers, raising her boys, and being her support system because the first nigga wanted nothing to do with the kids he lay down and made with her.
Black women had the highest maternal mortality rate than any other race in the United States—I’d read up on all the statistics and had to advocate for my sister frequently.
The shit was stressful, and it might have been selfish, but I didn’t want to go through that again with her.
As I hopped off the truck, I let out a deep sigh. Since I came in, we’d gone on two calls, and my body needed a break. I took a shower and pulled on a clean uniform before I made my way to the lounge area to kick my feet up and rest.
My phone buzzed in my pocket. I couldn’t fight the smile as I read Mali’s name on the screen.
Mali :
Hey! Just wanted to check in. I haven’t heard from you today.
ME:
Hey beautiful. This morning was hectic in the Gilliam household. Then I was called in. We’ve had two calls in the last three hours and I’m exhausted.
Mali :
Oh no! I’m sorry to hear that. How much longer do you have left of the shift?
ME:
Hopefully Cap will let me out before dinner. Probably not, though. We’re understaffed this weekend.
Mali :
Aww man. I hate that for you. Would y’all like some company? I can whip y’all up a snack. Maybe make some homemade fish sandwiches? Anybody allergic to fish?
ME:
I don’t think anybody here is allergic to fish. I’d really love to see your face.
Mali :
I can’t wait to see you, too. I haven’t been able to get you out my head since our date.
ME:
I miss you too. Send me your grocery list. I’ll go get what you need so you don’t have to spend any money and can get to me sooner.
Mali :
Oop. Say less. I’ll let you know when I’m headed your wayyyyy
ME:
Perfect. Be safe and see you soon.
“Must be texting Mali. Look at the goofy grin on his face,” Juliet teased.
“Let him make it. Our boy is in love.” Bradlee patted my shoulder as he made kissing noises.
“Grow up.”
“What’s the future Mrs. Gilliam doing today?” Juliet quizzed.
“She’s coming by the station to do a fish fry since we’ve been so busy. I’m actually about to head to the store to pick up the stuff she’ll need.”
Connor appeared out of thin air. “Someone said fish?”
We all laughed.
“That’s some big back shit, Cee,” I joked.
My phone buzzed with the ingredient list from Mali.
“Anybody wanna ride?” I tossed the offer into the air. Of course, all three of them wanted to join me. We let Cap know where we were headed before we took one of the SUVs to the local H-E-B.
It wasn’t a surprise we got more than we needed to, but it was always good to keep the station pantry and refrigerator stocked.
When we got back, Mali was in the kitchen with Captain Moore. Her unmistakable laugh filled the air as the four of us hauled the groceries into the lounge area.
“Hey, Flame.” She greeted me when I set the bags on the counter.
“Hey.” I pulled her into a tight hug, burying my face in the crook of her neck. She giggled.
“Your breath tickled me,” she stated as she rubbed my back.
“My bad,” I replied. I stepped back and took in her appearance. She had her hair pulled into a low ponytail with a headband that matched her floral printed sundress. Her body looked amazing, and she smelled delicious.