12. Sienna
twelve
Sienna
When your childhood crush—who’s also your first kiss, mind you—asks you to use him, what do you do? Because me? I’ve been up for the past two days thinking about it.
I groan as I scroll through the endless threads of Reddit users, all discussing their childhood crush, and I sigh as I come up empty…again.
On the one hand, I want to laugh in Jace’s face for playing such a prank on me. But on the other, I want to give in. I want to do as he asked and use him, but what does that make me? An asshole? A bitch? Crazy?
I feel overwhelmed…I need to write. Ever since I was a kid, writing has always helped me to feel better. I would write letters, knowing I’d never send them, and vent all of my frustrations.
“Fuck…” I mutter, my nose burning after my phone falls from my hands, smacking it.
“Don’t you have practice or something today?” Georgia asks as she walks into the living room.
I quirk a brow at her clothing choice of an off the runway Asteri couture three piece cropped pantsuit. I’d only been aware of what it was because the blonde wouldn’t stop talking about how she’d gotten her hands on it.
Georgia sees my obvious perusal and grins brightly, doing a small spin for me.
“Like what you see? I had to find a good strapless bra for this top or else my tits would be on display for Fashion Forecasting.” She grins, hoisting up her breasts before heading to the front door. I watch as Georgia pauses in her tracks, looking back at me before she sighs, slouching a bit .
“Is something going on with you? I feel like we haven’t had a chance to talk to one another lately, and you know I’m always there for you, Si Si,” she pouts, her plump lips frowning. I stalk towards her, grabbing my dance bag.
“I’m fine, G. Now, let’s go…Wouldn’t want to keep your admirers waiting,” I say jokingly as we exit the apartment.
Cleo left earlier this morning for one of her courses, and since I purposefully made my schedule to where I didn’t have courses on Friday, I’m free today except for work and practice with Daisy.
Daisy’s been acting so odd lately, dodging eye contact with me and making snooty remarks when my back’s turned. I just hope she doesn’t turn into one of the girls from my old university and becomes a raging bitch. It’d suck to lose a new friend after just meeting them.
When I get to the small studio on campus that Daisy and I rented out for our session, we immediately jump into work. Today, she’s a bit hostile towards me, eyeing me as if I’d kicked her cat, and it confuses me.
Did I do something to her? What could possibly be her issue with me?
Just as I’m about to question her, my phone dings over the Bluetooth speaker we’re using.
“It’s fine, we can ignore it…” I say, waving off the message as Daisy frowns, but just as we get back into the swing of things, more messages come in.
Daisy scoffs, her head rolling back as she looks up at the ceiling as if to ask God for the strength to deal with me. I cock my head to the side, watching her agitation grow.
“Can you be any more unprofessional? Go answer your phone!” She shoos me, flicking her wrist dismissively.
My imagination is overactive as my brain transports me into a combat video game. I imagine I’m a sharpshooter and Daisy’s my target and I’m aiming to kill. Just as my finger rest on the trigger I—
Ping! Ping!
Oh for the love of…
Snatching up my phone, my heart stutters as I reread the two messages from the one person I’d least expected to text me.
Heart
Did you make your decision?
It’s been two days
Me
Busy
Heart
Well get unbusy, we have a lesson today.
I reel back at his audacity. I don’t have to do anything. What could we possibly have a lesson—Oh! He means for work…I forgot that he’s my student…right. My heart triples in rhythm from the thought of being in a closed space with Jace grinding dancing with one another.
Get your head out of the gutter, girl…
Jace doesn’t give me the opportunity to text him back. My phone vibrates as he shoots me another message, this one sending my heart rocketing in my chest as I read it.
Heart
Outside.
Don’t make me wait, angel.
I look up to find Daisy already staring down at me, her expression pinched as she folds her arms under her chest.
“I’m sorry—” I try, guilt riddling my tone as I gather my things on the other side of the room, but she isn’t hearing any of it.
“Save it. When you’re ready to work, call me,” she grits, turning away from me to the large mirrored wall in front of us.
Not wasting any time, I make my way to the parking lot, pausing at the sight before me.
Jace leans cooly against the hood of his dark green Aston Martin SUV, his tanned, veiny forearms on full display from his sleeves being rolled up.
I tilt my head at him, and though he’s wearing sunshades, I just know he’s smug as all outdoors.
“Didn’t your mom put you in ballroom dance as a kid? Why do you need lessons?” I quip, siding up to him as he smirks at me.
“My teacher’s hot. Besides, we’re not here to dance today. We have to do an item on your list,” he says. Without giving me any time to process his words, he’s pulling my dance bag from my shoulder, transferring it to his.
I stand in my spot, gawking at him as his smirk morphs into a grin. Jace leans in close to my face and my stomach flips as he grips my chin, closing my mouth.
“You’ll catch flies, beautiful. Now go sit your pretty ass in the car, we’re late.”
Still in shock, I slowly make my way over to the door, but Jace beats me to it, opening the passenger door for me.
“Ladies first.”
Ladies first? Did the demon that possessed this boy for the past three weeks die or something? My mind races as I sit firmly in the heated leather seat. Not only did I walk out on practice, but I’m sitting in a psychopath's car…
“How did you even know I was here? Stalking much?” I shoot at him, my head snapping to face the smug bastard as he chuckles.
“You call it stalking, I call it being aware of your surroundings…” The asshole shrugs as he pulls out of the parking lot. Low R&B plays on the radio, and it takes me a moment to realize that it’s an unreleased song from my cousin, Zola.
I furrow my brows at the sound of the song, Jace must sense my confusion, but instead of acknowledging it, he turns it up.
How did I end up here…
I was supposed to go to dance practice with Daisy, check on the Minis at the studio, and then get a head start on my History of Modern Art coursework considering it’s my hardest class right now. Instead, I’m sitting in the passenger seat of my childhood crush's car, on the way to God knows where.
I side-eye Jace as he taps along on the steering wheel to the beat of the music that plays.
“We need to talk,” I say, turning off the radio, twisting in my seat to fully face him as he smirks slowly .
“Is this where you apologize for ditching me on the top of a skyscraper after tonguing me down and ignoring me for two years before professing your undying love for me? Or is this just a casual talk between besties?” he asks, briefly looking over at me.
His quick gaze is playful, but I can hear the seriousness and hurt in his words.
I hurt him.
Suddenly, my mouth is dry and my chest hurts. A part of me wants to tell him to pull over and give each other the clarity we deserve. But I know that time has passed us. So instead, I push back my feelings and wet my dry mouth.
“Sorry, bestie, but no.” I try feeling a bit at ease as Jace chuckles quietly. “We need some ground rules between us before we do anything on that list.”
“Shoot.”
My brows raise. Is it that easy?
It’s never that easy with a Heart man. I of all people should know.
“ This between us, stays like that. Between us. No one else knows. Hell, the girls don’t even know that I’m doing this shit—the list, I mean—Cleo almost passed out when she saw my hair .
I can’t send her to an early grave if she finds out I’m sneaking around with her best friend .
” I pull at my fingers, trying to calm my nerves as guilt racks my body.
I know that Cleo and Georgia would never judge me. They’d both be there for me no matter what, but how do I tell my best friend and closest family member that I fell for her best friend when we were eight and nine?
If Jace wants to interject, he doesn’t. For the rest of our fifteen minute drive to who knows where, he’s silent.
I don’t think I’ve ever seen a silent Jace Heart before, so the phenomena leaves me with an uneasy feeling as he pulls into the parking lot of an apartment building about five minutes away from my place.
“Listen, Sienna. I want to make you comfortable, so I’ll agree to your terms. but you owe me, I'm not someone you can just hide…I mean look at me.” He scoffs jokingly, but I know that he's serious as he gestures to himself.
My eyes betray me as they track Jace’s movements, slowly trailing from his collarbone to his crotch.
He sure isn’t someone I can hide …
My eyes trail up from his crotch to his mouth, my own mouth salivating as I stare at his plump lips before landing back on his eyes.
The air around me grows electric with tension as Jace's face grows closer, pulling me in. I want to kiss him, to get to know him again, but I can’t. So, instead of acting on that instinct, I turn my head and look out of the front windshield, cursing myself.
Jace chuckles quietly, getting out of the car. He turns to me in the passenger seat, completely brushing off the interaction.
“Don’t touch that door,” he commands as my palm lies flat against the door handle.
Raising a brow, I watch as he jogs around the car to my side, opening the door with a smug grin. Chills rack my spine as Jace leans down, his lips brushing the shell of my ear.
“Atta girl, tonight you’re mine.” he whispers. A flutter of butterflies swarm in my belly as I try to hold a tight leash on my composure, but my body tingles from where he’d just lingered.
When we enter the unknown apartment, my voice catches in my throat as I take it in. I stand in stunned silence, looking around the modernized loft with a glass balcony.
Had I known this place existed, I would’ve moved here instead of my current place.
This apartment is like all my wildest dreams in one, with a bed the size of Texas in the loft area and a couch equally as big on the lower level.
Pillows and soft throw blankets decorate the couch, but what catches my attention the most is the large flatscreen TV with the opening credits to one of my favorite movies in the world, The Lovers , on display.
My eyes brighten as I take in my surroundings.
“Do you like—” Jace starts, but my eyes immediately shift to the large vase of light pink Stargazer Lilies displayed intricately in a vase on the marbled kitchen island.
“Are those lilies?!” My shocked gasp is loud as I run over to the flowers .
My eyes brighten and the buds of my fingers tingle as I gently trace over the lines of the flowers.
Jace chuckles softly, making his way over to the kitchen.
He quietly goes through the cabinets, pulling out instant popcorn and a large white box.
I watch as he moves silently and efficiently through the place as if he owns it, and it isn't until he takes off his jacket, throwing it on one of the island’s chairs that I voice my concerns.
“Uh…Who’s place is this? I thought you lived with the rest of the team.”
An amused grin falls onto his tanned face as he places the white box in front of me. “Keeping tabs on me?”
“More like being aware of enemy territory,” I retort, squinting mockingly at him as he smiles.
“I bought this place at the beginning of the year when I thought I’d move out of the house.
Love the guys, but Blake snores when he loses games and Alec is a loud dude in bed, which is odd considering he’s the quietest out of all of us.
” He sighs, running a hand through his mop of blond waves.
Opening up the box, he steals a cookie, making my mouth water.
He got cookies from SweetTooth.
Fuck, I love their cookies.
“So why—”
“Did I bring you here?” he cuts me off, raising a brow from across the island.
Instead of responding, I nod and take a cookie of my own, watching him carefully as I chew.
Jace doesn’t seem to mind, though. Instead, he holds my eye contact, unwavering. He licks his bottom lip and my eye tracks the movement as his eyes glitter.
“Because I know you,” he says simply, as if that was the answer to all of my questions and more before stalking into the living room, plopping down on the massive couch.
I reluctantly follow, taking the box of cookies along before settling on a cushion a few feet away .
Jace raises a brow at the action, but remains silent as he moves in closer to me, spreading his legs out to get comfortable.
My mind is like a warzone as I fight the urge to let my shoulders drop and melt into him, but something in me can’t. I want to be able to lay here and watch a movie with him, but I don’t know how. And yes, I know that sounds stupid, but can you blame me?
I’ve never done any of this before.
Jace doesn’t seem to mind, though. Instead, he rests an arm over my shoulder and pulls me into him.
“You can trust me, Sienna. I won’t do anything you’re not comfortable with, I promise,” he says softly, holding out his pinky.
The breath in my throat catches at the reminder of all of the promises we’ve made with one another over the years, and without hesitation, I lock pinkies with him, my head turning towards him.
This close, I can see his every imperfection, but let’s be honest…Nothing about Jace is imperfect. He has these tiny freckles that decorate his golden skin like constellations, and those eyes . If I’d been standing, my knees would’ve grown weak from staring into them.
Jace takes his bottom lip into his mouth. His hooded gaze lowers to my lips, tracking my movements before settling on my eyes once again, dark and hungrily.
“Jace…” my voice trails off as I lean in close. We’re so close that I breathe in his minty air.
“Angel—”
The sound of crashing on the screen jolts us apart. My heart rackets against my chest as my eyes snap to the screen to see Lolark, the female main character, screaming in pain as an arrow protrudes from her back.
Blinking my surprise away, I focus back on the screen, inches away from Jace. Just five seconds ago, I almost kissed him. And had the TV not interrupted us, I would’ve.