Chapter 14 – Rosie
ROSIE
It shouldn’t matter what I wear. It’s just pizza at Golden Pies. And I’ll be third-wheeling it again.
With that in mind, I tug on a pair of wide-legged light-wash denim jeans and a light green tank top.
Charlie wanted to wear a dress. She said she wanted to look pretty for her daddy.
Her new vocabulary is going to take some getting used to.
The identity of her father has only been known by a few people in this world, but having it out in the open is still strange.
“Mama,” Charlie calls from the back door where she’s been peering out the small window.
“He’s here. He’s here!” She runs to the living room where I’m sitting on the footstool and sliding my feet into a pair of strappy sandals.
Snatching her stuffed mermaid from off the couch, she tugs my arm. “C’mon, Mama.”
I exhale a light laugh. “I’m coming, I’m coming.”
She takes off in a skip heading back down the hall, her red hair flowing behind her. “Hurry. I don’t want him to leave without us.”
I grab my purse and a thin sweater from the counter and meet her by the back door. “Don’t forget your jacket.” I nod toward the rack by the door.
“That’s not going to match with my dress,” she argues with a little pout.
“Denim goes with everything.” I flash her a smile.
She ignores me, pushing back the sheer curtain hanging over the little window on the back door. Her feet shuffle in place. “He’s not getting out of his truck. What if he leaves?”
“Hey? Charlie?” I call her, attempting to draw in her attention and focus on me. She glances at me over her shoulder. “It’s okay. He’s not going to leave. He’ll wait for us.” I touch her arm softly and lift my chin. “Get your jacket and then we can go out and meet him.”
With that, she hops to snatch it off the hook, then swings open the back door. I follow her out and lock the door before hurrying down the steps. Beck steps out of his truck and rounds the front of it to meet us at the bottom of the steps.
His brown hair is wavier than usual and isn’t hidden underneath a ballcap.
Dressed in a pair of tan Carhartt pants and a black Carhartt T-shirt, he might as well be ready for a ranching or hiking photoshoot.
We lock eyes and the air in my lungs stick.
But what freezes us both is when Charlie flings herself at him and wraps her arms around his waist.
“Uh…hey, Charlie.”
“Hi, Daddy. I thought you weren’t coming,” she rushes out, pressing her face into his side.
He flashes me an accusatory look before crouching. “Of course I was coming. I told your mom I would be here, didn’t she tell you?”
I’m still standing here, paralyzed by Charlie not only hugging Beck, but calling him daddy.
“Yes, but it took you forever.”
He checks his watch and chuckles. “I guess I am a few minutes late. Sorry about that.”
“It’s okay. What do you think of my dress?” She spins in front of him and my heart pushes against my chest. But it’s like whiplash when another feeling hits me. My core tightens as he takes her by the hand and spins her around again.
He smiles wide, his brown eyes glittering as he beams at her. My knees wobble at the sight of this moment of vulnerability. “Your dress is beautiful.”
“Mama picked it out,” she admits, once she’s finally done spinning.
“Well, your mama has good taste.” He glances at me, and my cheeks burn. “All right, little girl, ready to go?”
“Yes!” She jumps up and down.
Beck opens the back door of his truck, and she climbs inside.
I give him her booster and before he takes it, he leans in.
A blast of smoky cologne hits me when he whispers, “Or I should say, she had good taste. But now she thinks rich guys in business suits are more attractive than blue collar guys.”
My mouth pops open and we hold a look before he takes the car seat and turns around, leaving me stunned and dare I say a little turned on.
Golden Pies is just as I remember it. Same wood wall paneling, large black-and-white-checkered tile flooring, and red Formica tables.
The lighting has a golden glow to it, but I appreciate the haze.
It means when I look at Beck, his features are fuzzy and softened.
Because the very last thing I should be doing is checking him out.
We peruse the menus while seated across from one another on a wraparound bench. Charlie is in between us and sits up on her knees to reach for the children’s menu printed on a coloring page. She sets her stuffed mermaid on the bench next to her and chooses a blue crayon.
The bench vibrates beneath me, and I don’t need to look to know Beck is jiggling his knee. I study him over the top of my menu. He glances from his own menu and back at Charlie.
“You okay?” I ask him.
“Huh? What?” He fiddles with his menu.
Charlie’s crayon stops and she looks at him too.
“Your knee is shaking the whole booth.”
“Oh, sorry.” He stops jiggling and glances at Charlie again.
She smiles at him. “I shake my knee too.”
His lips tip up and he folds his arms, resting his elbows on the edge of the table. “Really? Well, look at that. Just another thing we have in common.”
She giggles and returns to her coloring.
“Tell me something else about you?” he asks, leaning closer to her. “You’re artistic. This is the second time I’ve seen you coloring. You’re good at it.”
She hunches a shoulder, twisting her lips to the side. “I guess, thank you.”
“Oh c’mon, Charlie, you’re better than good.” I encourage her to keep talking.
“Emma in my class, she’s really good. Miss Owens hung her art on the wall in the hallway. But not mine.”
A wave of defensiveness rises in me at the sadness in her tone. Beck whips his head in my direction and gives me a look like, what the hell?
Turning back to her he says, “Well, I’ll tell you what. If you finish coloring that before we’re done with dinner, I’ll hang it in my truck. That’s way better than some silly hallway.”
Her grin is huge, lighting up her light brown eyes. “Really? Thanks, Daddy.”
His lips twitch and his eyes flicker to me. My stupid heart spasms in my chest. It’s only a moment, a blip of a moment, but it’s one I’m bottling up to hold on to for safe keeping.
A server swings by our table and interrupts, which is probably best. We order a cheese pizza for Charlie and a gluten free crust pizza for me and Beck to share. Beck and Charlie get lemonade. After the margaritas the night before, I stick with water.
Beck tries to keep the conversation going with Charlie and I try not to butt in.
I could sing her praises forever, tell him everything about her, show him all the photo albums of her on my phone, but I want their relationship to form as organically as possible. I already took so much from them both.
I slip my phone from my purse and text West. Maybe it’s out of guilt because I’m spending time with Beck or maybe it’s guilt because I haven’t told him about Charlie meeting her father. But I will owe him an explanation. Eventually.
Hey, what happened to you last night? I thought we were going to FaceTime
West
Sorry, sweetie. I got tied up at the office. Raincheck?
Sure
West
Tonight?
After I get Charlie to bed?
West
Works for me. I miss you!
Miss you too
Genuinely I do. West has been the only man since Beck that I’ve trusted with my heart.
When I agreed to date him, it was a big deal.
And when he asked me and Charlie to move in, I spent a month contemplating it.
Yet, when he proposed, it was an instant yes.
Maybe that decision had been easy because Charlie loves him.
Or maybe I figured if I couldn’t make it work with him, I couldn’t make it work with anyone.
West is also the only other man I’ve slept with besides Beck.
With Beck, it was safe. He made me feel safe.
Even though I hadn’t been diagnosed with endometriosis yet, based on my symptoms, we assumed.
But he knew sex was often uncomfortable for me or even painful.
But he was patient with me. We talked through it together, there was plenty of trial and error, until we learned what positions were more enjoyable. He always made sure I was okay.
Sex with West is…difficult. While he’s gentle and tolerant, he’s usually more interested in getting off rather than assuring I’m comfortable.
I guess I’ve concluded that it’s something that will be more painful rather than pleasureful.
Even if I do experience an orgasm, it sometimes leaves me with a throbbing ache afterward while he’s already snoring.
“Ready to go?” Beck asks, standing next to the table and gazing down at me.
I blink up at him for a second before hurrying to scoot out of the booth, and a sharp pain stabs into my lower stomach. I pinch my eyes shut and hold my breath until it passes.
There’s a light graze of his calloused palm against my bare forearm. “Hey, you all right?”
Steadying my footing, I flutter my eyes open and find Beck’s face close to mine. I exhale and force a strained smile, reaching for my purse from off the bench. “I’m fine.”
Instead of forcing the subject, he takes my word for it and leaves me to tend to Charlie. I follow behind them, the earlier feeling of being the third wheel tonight cemented when I see Beck’s large hand tethered to Charlie’s small one.
Once we’re back at Dottie’s, Beck takes Charlie’s booster out of the back seat and sets it just inside the house once I’ve unlocked the door.
“Well,” he says, rising up on the balls of his feet and shoving his hands in his front pockets. “I hope you had a good time tonight, Charlie.”
“I did. It was fun.” She hugs his waist, and he removes one hand from his pocket to wrap around her from the side. “Thanks for the pizza.”
“You’re welcome. Maybe I can swing by tomorrow night and we could play a game or something?”
“Yay!” she squeals, jumping up and down.