Chapter 9
CHAPTER NINE
Sven’s bushy white eyebrows dipped low and his beard-framed mouth flattened into a thin line. “I’ll do whatever it takes to convince you to stay and I’m not changing my mind about the marriage proposal, so say you’ll think about it. Or you could just say yes.”
Every cell in Christy’s body ceased functioning for what seemed like an eternity. Despite the warmth of his skin around her fingers, she seemed to have lost all feeling. She couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think, couldn’t move—except her knees, which decided to give out.
“You need to breathe.”
When she couldn’t force out a response, he scooped her into his arms and carried her to the chair he’d used during the visit-with-Santa segment. He sat, still cradling her to his chest and looking like he was contemplating a call to the on-site emergency crew.
She finally managed to suck in a slow breath. “I—”
“Do I need to alert the EMTs? Is she okay?” Brenna’s concerned voice cut through the weird buzzing in Christy’s ears. “What happened?”
His slightly rosy cheeks grew redder. “She was feeling woozy. Can you have somebody get her something to drink?”
The photographer reached past Brenna in her wheelchair, holding out a bottled water. “They started kissing under the mistletoe while I was taking pictures and then she looked like she was going to faint.”
“You were kissing ?” His daughter’s half whispered question rose an octave with every word.
Sven grabbed the bottle and twisted off the cap. “Here. Take a few sips.”
The worry in his eyes faded a little as she drank two swallows, but the shock inspired by his unexpected request lingered in her confused brain.
Brenna rolled closer and spoke low enough not to be overheard by the crowd still gathered in the gym. “Are you planning to answer my question? Not that I have a problem with it. I’d just kind of like to know if you’re dating my OT.”
He capped the bottle without looking at his daughter. His gaze seemed permanently locked on hers, setting off that lightheaded feeling again. “I’ll date her if I have to, but I’d rather marry her. Maybe you could put in a good word for me since she likes you, Bee?”
“Wha— Oh my god. Of course!” Brenna sounded more excited than any of the kids who’d sat on Santa’s lap. “Christy, listen to me. I know he’s a little grumpy sometimes, but I promise he’s loyal and kind and reliable and he loves with his whole heart.”
The fake beard wiggled, as did his hat, when he shook his head. “I’m not a dog.”
“Hush, Dad. I’m not finished. Now, where was I?” His daughter frowned for a moment before forging ahead. “Oh yeah. And you must be incredibly special to him, because he’s never asked anybody to marry him before. I don’t think he’s even been on a date in years. Or maybe my entire life.”
Christy didn’t believe the last speculation, but the fact that Brenna hadn’t met any of his dates meant something.
“Oh, something else. My dad is definitely not a love-at-first-sight kind of person, which means the two of you have a history—probably from when you lived here. I wouldn’t be at all surprised if you’ve known each other since kindergarten and were high school sweethearts. You might not have grown up in the digital age, but information is pretty easy to find on the internet if you know where to look.” A smug grin created a pair of shallow but visible dimples in the young woman’s cheeks. “Am I right?”
Sven grunted, clearly unwilling to confirm her guesses with an outright yes.
“And, Dad, did you actually ask Christy to marry you? Or did you do that thing where you make it sound like an exasperated command? A ring would probably make your proposal more sincere too. I’m going to check in with the ticket committee. Text me when you’re officially engaged.” Brenna wheeled away, evidently finished with her insightful guesses and unsolicited advice.
He tightened his hold around Christy’s waist and sighed. “I swear she’s a bigger know-it-all now than she ever was as a teenager. Sadly, she’s also almost always right. I should’ve asked you instead of sounding desperate and bossy. Do you mind if we get out of here so we can have a little privacy?”
Hope tried to take root again, but she smothered it. If she told him the secret that had sent her fleeing years ago, maybe he would understand why she wasn’t cut out for relationships.
The sea of Creekside residents parted as Sven escorted Christy to the gymnasium’s double doors. Their smirks and winks told him word of the very public mistletoe kiss and Mrs. Claus’s subsequent swooning had spread like wildfire.
He tangled his fingers with hers to keep her from making a break for the teachers’ lounge or the parking lot without him. Carrying her had been his first choice, but she probably would’ve strangled him if he’d tried. Thankfully, his hard-on from holding her on his lap hid behind the hem of his fur-trimmed red coat.
She tried to tug her hand free when they finally emerged from the crowd and grumbled when he didn’t release her. “Where are we going?”
“To the nurse’s office.” Dodging an elf carrying a box, he narrowed the space between him and his make-believe better half.
“I don’t need medical attention.”
“No, but we need a quiet place with no chance of interruption so we can have a serious discussion that should’ve happened a long time ago.” A sign for his destination pointed to the right, amplifying the nervous tension in his neck and shoulders. This would be his do-or-die moment.
She didn’t drag her feet or argue that they had nothing to talk about, which were both positive signs.
The key the school secretary had loaned him slid into the lock with no resistance, saving him from having to text her for assistance getting into the room right outside the main office. He flipped on the light, gestured to the empty chair, and closed the door behind them. “Let’s sit.”
Although she didn’t look terribly pleased to be trapped in the tight space with him, she settled into the seat and calmly folded her hands in her lap. Her white knuckles betrayed her calm exterior.
He moved his street clothes from the second chair to the counter and turned his seat to face hers. As much as he needed to pace, he sat instead. “I still love you, Christy. For a while, I was so hurt I thought I hated you, but I couldn’t help it. No matter how hard I tried to wish the feeling away, it was always there. I gave up fighting it after a while and resigned myself to being alone for the rest of my life and focused on being a good father. Do you still love me?”
She stared at him without blinking for what seemed like a full minute. “My feelings for you are irrel—”
“No, they aren’t.” Despite wanting to vent about her worthless father’s influence on her self-image, he swallowed the harsh rant that wouldn’t make any difference since the jackass was dead. “Your feelings matter to me.”
Her hands clenched tighter, making him yearn to wrap them in his. “Fine. Yes, but—”
“No buts.” His heart sang with the knowledge that she hadn’t lost the intense connection he struggled with twenty-seven years later. “We’re taking this one step at a time. Okay?”
She nodded, even though she looked like she wanted to be anywhere but here.
Relieved to have her cooperation, he sorted through his jumbled thoughts. “Will you consider staying? I know Creekside has a lot of painful memories for you. We made so many good ones, though. Our friendship. All the things we did together. Falling in love. I want to make new memories with you, like loving you last night and kissing you under the mistletoe just now.”
“But…” Tears shone in her eyes, and they were like a punch to his solar plexus. “The day I left… It was all a lie. I found a legal document, two letters, and a picture by accident when I was looking for a book in my father’s bedroom. My mother didn’t die in childbirth. She signed away her parental rights and gave him full custody of me. My grandparents forced him to keep me when he wanted to turn me over to the state. Then they grudgingly let me stay at their house over winter break every year. None of them wanted me. How was I supposed to stay here?”
“Son of a bitch.” Rage coursed through him, even as he hauled her into his arms and wrapped himself around her, wishing he’d been able to protect her. He’d known her family situation wasn’t anything like his, but he hadn’t realized how shitty it was until her revelation. “I’m so damn sorry. They didn’t deserve to know you. If you stay with me, I promise you’ll never question if you’re wanted. Not another second for as long as you live. I love you and I’ve always wanted you. Please stay. Be part of my family. Will you marry me, Christy?”
She buried her face in his chest. Quiet sobs shook her shoulders and ripped his soul to shreds. At least she wasn’t pushing him away anymore.
He tightened his hold on her and rubbed her back in slow circles, hoping like hell he was providing her some comfort. “I’m here. No matter what you decide, I’m here for you.”
His phone buzzed in his pocket, but he refused to let the outside world intrude on this breakthrough moment. She needed his full attention, and he gave it willingly.
Several minutes passed before the heartrending weeping tapered off, her intermittent tears now accompanied by an occasional shuddering breath and sniffle. “I’m sorry.”
The heartache he’d endured for years returned with the softly spoken words.
It’s too much to ask of her.
How could he expect her to stay in a town associated with that much trauma?
He kissed her forehead, determined to set aside his disappointment and support her. Talking or guilting her into moving back to Creekside permanently would eventually backfire and she would leave again. “You have nothing to apologize for. Do you need a drink of water? There’s probably a box of tissues around here somewhere too.”
She clung to him, throwing him off-balance when he would’ve tried to stand and shift her to his chair. “I let you down the one time you really needed me. You were my best friend, and I ran away instead of helping you and trusting you to help me. I can never make up for that.”
Had her apology been for what had happened when they were eighteen and not equipped to handle the horrors of a parent with cancer and another who’d failed his flesh and blood every day of her life?
If he had only a miniscule chance with her, he would seize it. What other choice did he have? “There were extenuating circumstances. For both of us. We can’t change the past, but we can overcome it and right the real wrong. We deserve to be happy. Together.”
The glasses did nothing to hide her red-rimmed eyes, a testament to how deeply she’d been hurt. In spite of her pain, the palpable emotion that glowed there made his pulse race and gave him hope. “I love you. How soon can we get married?”