Chapter 20
20
Malik
I fucking hurt . And something annoying was beeping, dragging me out of my slumber and grating on my last fucking nerve. Slowly, I peeled my eyes open, thankful the room I was in was dark. There was a cloying scent of disinfectant hanging heavy in the air and the low chatter that only came with hospitals was reaching my ears, almost as annoying as the fucking beeping machine.
Right—I got fucking shot trying to save Anatoly’s ass.
I hoped whoever shot me got to meet Rurik because this was going to put me out of commission for a while, and the goddamn medical bills were going to be a pain in my fucking ass. Add rehab on top of that—because I knew I would need rehab for my shoulder—and I was looking at hundreds of thousands of dollars since I didn’t have health insurance.
Mother fuck .
With that kind of debt, maybe Anatoly should’ve just let me bleed out in front of that restaurant.
“You’re awake.”
I turned my head, watching as Rurik rose from the reclining chair against the far wall, tucked into a corner. His clothes were rumpled, and he hadn’t shaved, a light stubble coating his jaw that usually wasn’t there. And his hair was shiny with oil from lack of washing. It was a bit alarming to see him so disheveled, especially when he always had his shit together.
“How long was I out?” I rasped.
“Few hours,” Rurik told me as he came to stand by my bedside, his hands in the pockets of his slacks. “Long enough for you to undergo surgery to dig the bullets out of your shoulder and chest. I wasn’t here for that though.”
I grunted as I shifted, trying to get more comfortable. Immediately, despite clearly being pissed, Rurik began to help me, raising the bed a little with a button on the railing and adjusting my pillow for me. Once I was comfortable and my pain levels had gone down some, I looked back up at him, hating the sheen of sweat that’d formed on my skin.
“Where were you?” I asked. I wasn’t upset he hadn’t been here. What the fuck was he expected to do—sit in the waiting room and twiddle his thumbs while he waited for me to come out of surgery? If he had done that, I’d be pissed . All that time could’ve been used to find who the fuck did this to me.
Because fuck knew if he’d been on the receiving end of these bullets, I wouldn’t stop until I found the mother fucker and stole the life right from their fucking eyes.
“Taking care of business,” he said, leaving it at that. I nodded, knowing what he was getting at. Whoever shot me was taken care of. But then, I paused, realizing something was around my neck, and my good arm slowly raised to touch my throat. When I felt the chain there and the small padlock holding it together, my muscles froze. Tension rode my body hard, and for a moment, I couldn’t fucking breathe.
“What the fuck is this?” I growled, tugging at it. But I wouldn’t be breaking it. I knew that much.
“Your new collar,” Rurik supplied. Something in me loosened knowing he’d been the one to put it on. His lips quirked in amusement. “What—you really thought I’d let someone else put a fucking collar on you, baby?” He scoffed. “Fucking think again.” Reaching forward, he fingered the padlock. “There’s a tracking device in here. Every sixty days, I have to change it out.” His eyes met mine. “But I’ll always know where you are.” He gritted his teeth, his mask slipping, that monster he hid peeking through. “When Anatoly called me to tell me to come to the hospital, I felt… lost. Untethered. Because I didn’t know where the fuck you were, and he wouldn’t goddamn tell me.”
“I was here… I think,” I said, wondering if I could remember. But all I remembered was getting shot. Everything after that was just gone.
“You were,” he confirmed. “But I didn’t know what room you were in. Didn’t know what hall or what part of the fucking hospital.” He gritted his teeth and tugged on the chain around my neck, lifting me just the tiniest bit. I grunted in pain, but he didn’t release me. “And you’re not off the hook for that stupid fucking stunt you pulled,” he growled, lowering his face to mine. His mask was completely gone now, and his eyes were cold yet somehow full of fire as he stared into my own. “When you get out of here, Malik, you’re going to pay for every bit of suffering I went through from the moment Anatoly’s call came through my line until you woke up a few minutes ago.”
I swallowed thickly, hating that his words had my dick hardening all while trepidation slid through my veins. “I’m injured,” I tried.
His lips curled up at the corner, but it wasn’t a kind smile. No, his smile was full of malice and the promise of sweet torture. “You think I don’t know how to punish you without injuring you further, Malik?” He pressed his mouth to mine in a kiss so hot and aggressive, my lips bled, and I leaked precum beneath my hospital gown. When he pulled back, his blue eyes were bright with mania, and his lips were stained red with my blood. “I’ve been living in fucking hell since I got that goddamn phone call, Malik.”
“I’m sorry,” I rasped. And I was sorry. I never meant to make him panic like that. Or lose control of himself to this point. “I just… Anatoly has a family. A daughter and a wife. And he’s your best friend.”
“And you’re mine ,” Rurik snarled, tightening his grip on the chain until it choked me. I gripped his wrists, pain flaring through my shoulder as I did so. “Doesn’t that fucking mean something to you, Malik? I can survive losing my best friend. I cannot survive fucking losing you.”
With that, he released me, and I dropped back onto the mattress, gasping. My shoulder and chest were burning . Rurik stalked away from me, pacing to the window and staring out over the dark world outside, his hands in his pockets again as if he hadn’t just choked the absolute shit out of me. I mean, fuck, I was going to have bruises in the shape of his chain.
“I’m sorry,” I said again. I wasn’t used to apologizing. Wasn’t used to feeling guilty. But even though Rurik and I hadn’t always seen eye to eye, he’d given me freedom in my mind. When he was in control of me and I let him, my mind was free of all the millions of thoughts that constantly plagued me and left me feeling on edge. He left me feeling calm .
I couldn’t lose that. I couldn’t lose him .
He turned to face me, that mask of his carefully put back in place. An almost pleasant smile tilted his lips, and honestly, it scared the shit out of me. No one should be able to flip their emotions like that. No one .
“I know you are, baby,” he murmured, his voice like silk. I swallowed thickly. “And once we get out of this fucking hospital, I’ll make sure you don’t make the same mistake twice.”
Fuck .