Chapter 14
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
My wolf surged forward, restless and ready to fight. Between the imminent threat and not training every day, my human and animal sides were easily excitable, and not in a good way.
I stepped toward the woods, but the wolf disappeared from sight. The padding of paws grew faint as it slipped away.
Dammit. That wolf could've overheard my entire conversation with Rosemary. And I’d been none the wiser to his presence because I was too overcome by my emotions. Dad had warned me that was what happened when you didn't think with a level head. Being rogue was clearly affecting my ability to be rational.
The urge to shift almost overwhelmed me, but I pushed my wolf back and took a moment to think. I couldn't allow my animal to take control away from my human side. If I let it happen, the rogue part I was already struggling with would get even worse.
For all I knew, the wolf shifter could've been the one who drew the painting and had been watching my next moves to confirm it was me.
Well, if that was his end goal, I sure made it easy for him.
I should've ignored Rosemary and waited for Killian in front of the building, but something inside me had snapped. Now I wished I could take it back. If that wolf was someone scouting me out for the men who’d attacked my pack, I'd placed a flashing neon light above my head that basically said, “I'm here.”
Dad had to be shaking his head at me in heaven. I kept messing up. Everything he’d taught me I'd wildly abandoned.
Maybe me not being alpha of my pack was a good thing. I wasn't wise enough to lead.
Refusing to make another damn mistake, I inhaled, filling my lungs, and cautiously approached the woods. I wouldn't go far, just try to catch the wolf's scent better. At least, that way, I would recognize him when I ran into him again.
As I approached the tree line, I stopped and listened for anything that would indicate there were more shifters close by or anyone who could possibly jump me. My too-stupid-to-live moments were done from this point forward.
Nothing sounded or smelled out of the ordinary, so I pushed forward in the direction where the eyes had been. The closer I got, the stronger his scent became, but the smell was strange. The musk that confirmed it was a wolf shifter was there, but that was about it. There wasn't anything unique about it, which meant he’d used something to mask part of his scent.
Which told me everything I needed to know.
He could be part of the pack that slaughtered my family and friends.
I had to get out of here before he circled back and brought reinforcements.
Pivoting on my heel, I made my way back toward the main building, passing four vampire girls who were hanging out in the sun. The fact that they were sitting in direct sunlight meant they still had their humanity. That reassured me that they didn't kill for pleasure and were able to control their instincts. That was a requirement in order to attend school here, most likely due to the human visitors who came to hike the amazing woods.
One of them wrinkled her nose when she saw me, proving that, like angels, vampires didn't like intermingling outside their species.
Or it could be me. I did try to give off a fuck-you vibe. The more that people talked to me, the more likely I could slip up and say something that could hint at any one of my secrets.
Pretending that I didn't notice her sour expression, I pushed through the double doors and headed straight toward the hallway.
Luna's all-too-familiar voice rang in my ear from the tables in front of the cafeteria. "Aw, did Killian leave you?"
I'd gone a little over a week without seeing her, and still enough time hadn't passed. I stopped short, making my point clear that I wouldn't try to run from her. "Nope, he needed to run an errand, and then he'll be right back." I forced a sweet smile that felt foreign. The only reaction I wanted to give her was the middle finger.
"And he didn't take you with him?" Luna sashayed over, her dark sage maxi skirt flowing out around her. She tilted her head, causing her hair to fall in front of her shoulders, brushing against her cream top. "Sounds like trouble in paradise." She turned to face a girl a couple of inches shorter than me who was following right behind her. "Jessica, you may get Killian sooner rather than later after all."
The girl's forest-green eyes focused on me, and she gave me an uncomfortable smile as she twisted chestnut hair with natural light caramel tips around one finger. Her modest pale pink wrap top complemented her medium olive complexion. "I'm sure he needed something, and things are okay between them."
Wow. I hadn't expected that.
I'd expected this girl to be as hateful or even more so than Luna, but positive energy emanated from her.
"Oh, you don't need to be nice to her." Luna waved me off. "She doesn't live in the city and never will if I have anything to say about it."
I'd never disliked someone as much as Luna before in my life. Well, correction. I outright hated the people hunting me, but she was a very close second. "Killian doesn't live in the city either."
"His best friend—my future mate—" Luna said as she patted herself on the chest "—will get him into the city where he belongs. It's only a matter of time."
That was an odd thing to say, but whatever. I didn't have time to deal with her mind games. "Great, good luck with that."
"I didn't dismiss you." She walked over to me and lifted her chin. "I'm not done talking to you."
She was grating on my nerves. I’d come inside so the wolf couldn’t spy on me, but I’d rather be captured than have to deal with her. However, I had to be careful, I didn't want her to follow me outside. "What?" I couldn't hide my annoyance.
"Look, I'm trying to be nice." She scoffed and crossed her arms. "I wanted to say thank you."
She was determined to tell me whatever was on her mind. However, I wouldn't give her the satisfaction of asking. "You're welcome."
"Don't you want to know why I'm thanking you?" She pouted.
Like that was going to work. "No, but I don't think that matters. Clearly, you want to tell me."
"Griffin’s been spending a lot more time in Shadow City, which has been amazing for me. I was so upset when he bought that house by Killian, but now that he’s avoiding staying there, I'm wrangling him faster than I'd originally planned." She ran her hands through her hair. "I'm thinking you had something to do with that."
My wolf howled in my head so damn loud that I almost whimpered. My heart felt like it was fracturing, but that made no sense. I'd seen the guy only a couple of times, and he’d been an asshole for most of it.
They were a match made in heaven. I should have been thrilled that he had a reason to stay away…but I wasn't. I'd have liked to pretend it was because Killian missed his best friend, but that wasn't the truth. I wanted Griffin around too.
A portion of my heart grew colder at the thought of him with Luna. Not wanting to risk sounding broken, I nodded and glanced at Jessica. I forced my words to be smooth. "It was nice to meet you." And I turned and headed back out the front doors.
"What a bitch," Luna huffed. "I was thanking her."
"Well, you did tell her she'd never move into Shadow City and then in the next breath said her boyfriend would," Jessica said, "I'm thinking that hit her hard."
Not wanting to hear anymore, I stepped outside and walked onto the lawn in front of the building. The vampire girls were now watching a group of bear shifters playing football with no helmets. They had their shirts off, which almost made me laugh because their chest hair was so thick you couldn't even see their nipples.
Needing to be around noise so I couldn't hear Jessica's and Luna's conversation, I sat against a tree trunk close by and watched the idiots tackle each other over and over again.
Familiar footsteps made their way to me, and Killian's scent tickled my nose. I glanced toward the building and found his gaze on me.
"Are you ready to go?" he asked as his eyes flicked toward the bear shifters, who were putting on a show for the girls sitting around them.
The longer I’d sat out there, the more girls had congregated. I had to admit the bear shifters were sexy in their own right, and they were eating up the attention. Even a few angels, their floral scents giving them away, were standing around near the vampires, pretending to want to watch the game.
"Yeah." I knew I sounded terse, but, I hated being around people right now. My skin was crawling. Any time one of them made eye contact with me, I felt like they knew my secrets.
I needed to get control of my emotions because being rogue was beginning to cause even more problems. My hands kept growing sweaty, and my mind became hazy more frequently. At times, I felt a phantom pack connection that made my wolf restless. But it would vanish almost as quickly as it appeared. My wolf and I both needed to feel a connection to something, and the cold void seemed to be expanding and putting a wall up between my animal and human sides. If I didn't find a pack soon, I might go insane. Even Killian’s comforting presence was having less of an effect on me. But if I became part of his pack, I’d connect with all the other hundreds, which wasn’t an option. And the fact that he tried to maintain distance from his pack spoke volumes. I doubted they’d accept me—an outsider—so easily.
I had no clue what the answer was, but I needed to figure out something soon.
"Well, come on," he said and reached out a hand.
The stench of spray paint attacked my nose. I almost coughed but managed to hold it together. If the wolf was watching me, I didn't want to tip him off to what Killian had done. He could figure that out on his own. Granted, he probably wouldn't care that the image was covered. He’d painted it to get a reaction from me, and I’d already fallen into the trap.
Placing my hand in Killian’s, I let him pull me to my feet, and the two of us headed toward the truck. We held an amicable silence until we were pulling out of the university.
"Were you able to cover it?" I tried not to let him know how nervous I was, but he knew me too well.
He nodded. "Yeah, I was. Sorry it took so long, but I had to make sure I didn't get caught."
"No, it's fine." His words weighed on me. "You shouldn't have done it. You're putting so much at risk by housing me and being my friend."
"Stop it." He pointed at me in warning. "That's what friends do for one another, and come on, you know I think of you as a sister."
"Because I remind you of her." Maybe he was investing too much in me because of that. "Even though we have different tastes in clothes."
"Olive wanted to fit in with Luna and Jessica." He sighed. "She dressed more like you until the last year or so before her death, but to be clear, I’m not helping you just because you remind me of her. Maybe at first, that was why, but not anymore. You've become a true friend. "
I loved that he could be honest with me. I owed him the same. "I don't want anything to happen to you. There was a wolf watching me when I went off on Rosemary."
"What are you talking about?" His brows furrowed.
I filled him in on my embarrassing display.
"That doesn't change anything, other than that we need to figure out who the wolf is.” He patted my arm as he said firmly, "And we're going to get through this together. We're each other's family now. That's final."
But the problem was I couldn't agree with that. If I were in his shoes, I'd have been saying that same thing. But he’d lost his family too. And because of me, his best friend hadn't been around.
Thinking back to the night before Griffin disappeared felt like a punch to the gut. One second, we were at each other's throats, and the next second, I wanted to rip his clothes off and do things I'd never done with anyone else. I still had whiplash from my emotions that night.
The worst part was that not seeing him was driving me crazy. And to know he'd been spending time with Luna was like mixing Pop Rocks candy and Coke. I was about to explode, or implode, and I had no fucking clue why.
I decided to change the subject from something I didn't want to talk about to something he didn't want to. It would make him shut down, at least for a little while, and I could use the reprieve. "Jessica doesn't seem all that bad." I lifted a brow at him. "In fact, she's quite breathtaking."
"How'd you meet her?" Killian pursed his lips as he glanced at me.
"Well, it involved Luna, which was very unpleasant." On so many levels. "Jessica was with her. She seems sweet."
"Jessica isn't the problem." He tapped his fingers on the steering wheel. "It's more of who her best friend is. Although honestly, what does it say about her that she chooses to be close friends with Luna?" He shuddered.
He did have a point. "They’re from Griffin’s pack, right?"
"Yes, and their fathers are close. They grew up together, but still. Also, my parents were fated mates, and I want to find my own. I don't want to settle for something other than that. A chosen mate is out of the cards for me. Why try to build a relationship with someone fate knows isn’t for you? Why waste time in a relationship with someone when I know how it'll end?"
And he had a good point there too. If he knew what he wanted, then pushing him to do otherwise would only result in heartache.
Either way, with my secret coming out and the wolf now watching me, I knew exactly what I had to do to protect Killian and myself.
The moon shone through the window, alerting me that it was around midnight. I’d been lying in bed for hours, needing rest, but sleep wouldn’t come. Each time I closed my eyes, images of my dead pack jumped vividly through my mind, but surprisingly, that wasn’t the worst part. The worst part was Killian lying lifeless with them as well.
I got up and paced back and forth at the edge of the bed, trying to find some sense of calm, but it was futile.
My wolf howled in my mind, wanting to seize control, desperate to get out, and Killian’s lifeless face was in every shadow of the room. Something tugged inside me, making my wits scatter, the sensation adding to my sense of losing control.
Terror took hold of me, and I couldn’t regain my calm. My wolf surged forward, bucking against my hold.
Staying here wasn’t an option any longer, but leaving would break my heart. I’d promised Killian we were in this together. However, if I didn’t do something, I wasn’t sure how much longer I could hold my wolf at bay.
On the nightstand sat some plain white stationary and a pen. I grabbed it quickly and wrote a note.
Killian,
Earlier when you said I was your family, I know I didn’t say anything in response. But I want you to know I feel the same way about you. You’ve been the one bright spot since that horrible day you found me in the river.
I planned on staying like I promised, but I realized tonight that I can’t put you at risk. It would be selfish of me to stay and to risk the amazing future you deserve.
I’m sorry this is how I’m saying goodbye, but I'm not strong enough to say it to your face. You’ve become my home, and I love you.
Your sister always,
Dove
I placed the note on my pillow, and a sob formed at the back of my throat. I swallowed it down as I opened the window, making sure not to make any noise. The bag I’d packed earlier lay on the floor with a few changes of clothes, ID, and some cash. Of course, my trusty knife was strapped to my ankle.
After grabbing the bag and tossing it through, I slipped out the window and landed on both feet. Forcing myself to stay calm, I scanned the area.
Everything looked clear.
Sighing, I picked up the bag and slung it over one shoulder. My plan was simple. Get to the river and use it to find another city or town. I'd rent a car and get as far away from here as possible. Staying near my old neighborhood must have made it easier for them to find me.
As I jogged toward the back of the house, the back porch light at Griffin's house turned on, and the back door opened.
The tug was so hard I nearly fell to my knees. I stopped in my tracks as emotions I didn’t understand surged through me—a mixture of desire, need, and desperation.
"Dove, what the hell are you doing?" Griffin growled. "That bear shifter could be out here. Get your ass back inside."