Chapter 73
RAINE
It’s snowing when I open my shades. Light, fluffy snow peppers down from the sky. It’s not the type of day that goes with my mood. Outside, Hallmark movie snow drifts out of the sky. Blue sky snow. Not lost-in-the-backcountry-woods-with-a-dark-sky snow.
Today’s the day. Six months.
There’s an impression on the pillow where Roark was last night. Two nights ago, it was Evander. There’s no pattern, but I’m never alone. But I haven’t asked to be.
I dress and head to the dining room, where I’m shocked to find them all. That’s something that doesn’t happen very often. Not with Roark searching the sky for Firested dragons. Not with Kieren playing cat and mouse with his parents over his sister’s wellbeing.
Kieren reaches for me first. “Raine, you look beautiful today.”
I hug him good morning. It’s hard to look him in the eye. My six-month contract was up two weeks ago. Today’s the six-month anniversary of the ceremony. I’m trying not to back down. I have to go through with this. Walk away with my dignity. Let them fulfill their commitments.
“Thank you,” I say to both Kieren and Evander as he pulls out my chair.
“Duchess,” Roark says. I place my napkin in my lap and cock my head at him. “The three of us have to head through the Thessari today.”
“Oh? Why?” I’m trying my best to sound cheerful.
“The king and queen have set up another ball. For tomorrow.” Evander leans forward.
“Six months and a day after the ceremony. That’s—”
Kieren cuts me off. “Disgusting of them. Manipulative and uncaring.”
“I was going to say resourceful. You got them to delay it before, because of the six months. But they want what they think is best for the citizens of Crest Wing,” I say.
“I don’t give a damn about them,” Kieren spits. “I care about us.”
Evander nods. “You’re the most important person to us.”
I smile and wince. Because I’m breaking my own heart.
“And the three of you are the most important people to me. But I can’t have you changing everything for me.
You need the magic from the Thessari. You .
. . you are other-realm dragons. Not Earthbound dragons.
And if we mate, you’ll have to stay here and give up your families, your homeland.
Like you said before, Evander. What of your real thunder mate?
What if she’s at the ball? We always have choices.
I need to go back to New York.” I cross my arms over my chest.
“Exactly, Raine. We have choices. I choose you. We can live here. Be Earthbound,” Kieren says.
“And then what happens to your sister? Who will be there to protect her? Who will lead Crest Wing? Protect them?”
“We can still protect them; we have the portal,” Evander says.
“No. The portals aren’t working correctly. What if they stop altogether? You can’t be both places, protecting the portal and Crest Wing. And you can’t reign. No, you won’t be happy.” I cup Kieren’s cheek. “None of you will be happy if you are Earthbound. You need the power from your homeland.”
Roark clenches his eyes shut, and when he opens them, a tear rolls down his cheek. “I don’t want to lose you, Duchess.”
“You won’t lose me. I will keep you all in my heart. I’ll keep loving the three of you enough for all of us. But you need to take a mate at the ball. Forget me. Find a witch and erase me from your consciousness if you need to.”
“There’s not enough power in the world to erase you from my heart, Raine,” Evander says.
He pulls me into his chest. His arms wrap around me.
It’s the tightest hug I’ve ever had. I breathe in his musky almond scent.
I need to memorize it. I should find a perfumery before I leave Europe and bottle them.
I want to cry. I want to cry so badly, but if I do, I won’t stop. I won’t stop and they won’t go. And they have to go.
Kieren glares at Roark, and they are clearly having a fight. It’s silent, but their faces twitch and the coffee cup in Roark’s hand groans under the pressure he’s putting on it.
“You have something to say, say it out loud.” It comes out like I’m a kindergarten teacher, like I’m going to ask them to catch a bubble next.
“We have to go to the realm together today. I’m begging you to change your mind.”
“I’m sorry, no. I want the three of you more than anything. But I can’t. We tried. I’ve never tried to make something happen as much as I tried to make the lightning happen.”
“No.” Roark’s blue eyes glare at me. “No.” The cup shatters on the table.
“Roark? Please try and see this from . . . No, you don’t have to. You don’t have to see this from my point of view. You don’t have to do anything, but I’m going to ask you to respect my decision. I’m not going to change my mind. I’m not taking you away from your people.”
“That’s really what you want?” Kieren asks.
“It’s what I need, not what I want. I need to go back to New York City.”
“You’re a lot tougher than I ever imagined.” Kieren stands and pulls me to his chest. “I love you, Raine. That’s not going to change.” He shakes his head and leaves the room.
Roark’s face is red, his lips in full scowl. He pulls me into his chest and hugs me tightly enough that I might break in two. But I’m hugging him just as tight. I let go first, and when he does, there are tears in his eyes. He pivots away without a word.
“I want you to change your mind. Please have mercy on us, Raine. We’re grown males. Nothing has ever felt this right for me. Nothing. There’s a reason the lightning didn’t hit you, and I will find it,” Evander says.
“You need to think of Aisling. If you find a mate and take over for the queen and king, you can stop another clan war. End the fighting, make things better. Do that for me.”
Evander cocks his head at me. “Raine?”
Now I’m the one shaking my head. “I love you, Evander. I love all of you. It’s why I have to let you go.”
“Let us go to the realm today. We’ll come back in two days. Just give us that. You’ll have changed your mind.”
“I’ve booked my ticket for tomorrow.”
“Tickets can be changed.”
“Yes, but I’m not going to change it.”
“You know, you can be very stubborn,” Evander says.
“I know.”
“This isn’t goodbye.” Evander kisses me. “I refuse to believe it.”
I’m alone in the dining room. I’m not going to cry. I walk so slowly from the dining room to the collection room, where I spend all day finishing up my records and saying goodbye to the paintings.
I turn off the computer and hand the binder with the collection catalog to Leo. “Here. Will you make sure whoever takes care of the art after me has this?”
“I will.”
“I’m going to go to bed early. I’ll see you in the morning?”
“Of course, Miss Fischer. I will see you in the morning.”
Istand beside my breakfast chair. My eyes are puffy from crying all night, but I laugh. It’s been six months, and I’ve forgotten how to pull out my own chair. I’m trying really hard not to be sad.
It wasn’t me. I know they love me. But it wasn’t me. I’m not their one. The lightning didn’t happen. You can’t force fate.
I pull out my own chair and eat my breakfast. Most of the staff has left the castle for Crest Wing. It’s a big deal, the gathering. That’s what I overheard in the hall. They talk in front of me now. With sad expressions. But they don’t rush away or use the hidden passageways.
My chest aches. I don’t care about being a dragon’s mate. I don’t care about wealth or the art collection. I wish I could have been theirs, forever. But they have responsibilities, responsibilities I can’t take them away from. Percy’s agreed to take me to Zurich later today.
Tonight’s the ball. Tonight’s the night they will find someone. One of their own. Someone from Crest Wing. Someone who will help them protect Kieren’s sister. I twist off the ruby ring and leave it next to my plate.
A bell chimes.
“What’s that?” I put my coffee cup on the dining room table.
“It’s the front door, Miss Fischer,” says Leo.
“It’s my last day here. Can you call me Raine?”
“As you wish, Raine. I’m going to miss you.”
The chime goes off again.
“One last first for me here at Cloud Rift. I’m going to answer the door.” I race by him and through the foyer. I can’t look at the portal. My heart squeezes. Actually, my heart’s pounding as I race toward the door.
The chime sounds again. I slide around the corner. I need less cloudberry sponge cake and more cardio. I right myself and keep jogging. It’s a weird feeling, but I want to be the one to answer the door. I slide by a staff member, almost bowling him over.
“Miss Fischer,” he says with shock in his voice. My steps pound the stones, and I slide into the large oak door that faces the gravel “car park.”
I throw open the door and I’m staring at a man.
No, male. He’s definitely a dragon shifter, and fuck, I think I have a new type.
Dark hair, well over six feet tall, but unlike the guys, he has bright green eyes and there’s no business suit.
He’s wearing a leather jacket and a wool stocking cap over his midnight hair. Firested for sure.
“Where the hell are they?”
I play dumb. “Who are you looking for?”
“The thunder?”
“The thunder? It’s not even raining.” I bite the inside of my cheek.
His large chest fills. “They’re fucking ruining everything.” He glares at me. He’s not buying my dumb act. “Are you inviting me in?”
“Depends. Are you a vampire?”
“No, and that’s not how that works, anyway.”
Damn, I didn’t know vampires were a thing, but then I didn’t know there were other realms six months ago. Figures I have one more thing for my NDA on my last day here. “Well, I’m leaving for the airport soon.”
“You’re not going anywhere—at least, not in this realm.” He reaches out and puts his icy hand on my cheek. I should step back. I’ve just lost three boyfriends. I don’t need to get another one before the bed’s gone cold. My heart wiggles in my chest. My throat starts to close.
“You can’t tell me what to do . . .” I trail off. Where his hand is touching me isn’t cold anymore. It’s on fire, a tingling sensation running through my body.
There’s yelling going on behind me. Lots of yelling. But I can’t make it out completely.
“Firested,” a staff member screams.
“No,” Leo’s voice echoes behind me.
I itch. No, not itch. Burn. My face isn’t the only thing on fire. My left calf, right thigh, my lower back—it’s a long list up to the skin on my chest. I’m in pain, dizzy, and turned on all at the same time. I’m shaking, quivering. All the while, the stranger’s green eyes hold mine.
“What did you do?” I say through dry lips.
“The final touch. Didn’t want to. You and them are going to make my life a hell of a lot more difficult.” His eyes glow. “It’s going to hurt like hell, but you’ll be okay. At least you didn’t fall out of the fucking sky.”
My eyes slam shut. I’m going down.
Thank you so much for reading Shadow of Wings.