Chapter 37
?
Maksim
After a few days, Roman sets up a gathering so I can officially meet Victoria. I knew she needed time to process the idea of me, and even though I never pushed, letting Roman decide when the moment was right, I can’t help but feel a little nervous.
What if I say the wrong thing? What if she’s scared of me? Next to Roman and Niko, I look like I just got out after twenty years in prison.
That’s how I end up standing in Roman’s entryway, Julia’s hand in mine, waiting for an eighteen-year-old girl I’ve never met.
Roman and Luna come down first, followed by Niko and a woman in her sixties carrying a tray of cookies. The scent of vanilla and strawberries drifts through the air, calming me for a moment until I spot a messy bun tied with a pink ribbon.
She’s wearing a pale pink sweater and black leggings, with giant unicorn slippers on her feet that make her look like a yeti. I can’t help but smile.
When I focus on her face, I notice tears in her eyes. They’re the same color as mine, but hers are clearer, brighter, holding a kind of light I’ll never have.
A lump forms in my throat, and Julia’s grip tightens around my hand.
As Victoria steps in front of me, my mouth goes dry. Not a single word wants to come out.
She studies my face for a few seconds, seconds that feel like forever. Then, all at once, the sweetest smile takes over her features. She looks like an angel, and I know that if anyone ever tries to dim her light, they’ll beg every god to turn them to dust before I get my hands on them.
“Maksim,” I manage, my voice rough, as I reach out my hand.
She frowns at my hand for a moment, then suddenly throws her arms around me, holding on like I’m a life raft in the middle of the ocean.
“You can call me Vi. I love pink, but I can shoot, and I love ballet…oh, and fantasy books, but they have to have some romance, otherwise I get bored. And I really like powdered donuts,” she rattles off in one breath, still hugging me tightly.
I take in every detail, every inflection, trying to figure out what matters most. I’ve missed her entire life, but I want to believe that someday she’ll turn to me the way she does to Roman or Niko.
“Vi, I don’t think he needs your whole autobiography,” Niko jokes.
Vi lets go of me, but grabs my hand and turns to Niko. “You’re just jealous you’re not the prettiest brother anymore,” she teases, sticking out her tongue.
Niko clutches his chest, feigning heartbreak. “You wound me, Vi. That’s all it took for me to lose my place in your heart?”
Roman rolls his eyes. “We’re twins, and everyone still thinks you’re the better looking one,” he grumbles, making everyone laugh.
“For me, you’ll always be the most handsome,” I hear Luna whisper to Roman as she kisses his cheek.
Roman kisses the top of her head, and for the first time, I feel a warmth in my chest that’s different from what I feel for Julia. It’s a sense of belonging, of being included, of comfort. Maybe this is what it feels like to be surrounded by family.
?
Later, after Victoria shows me all her ballet trophies, I notice her hesitate at one particular newspaper clipping. It’s from her first performance, the one I watched from the shadows. I realize why she doesn’t want to mention it.
“You remember the girl who pushed you and made you lose your balance?”
Her eyes widen, and confusion flickers across her face as she wonders how I could possibly know about that incident.
I just keep scanning the other photos of her on stage, letting the moment hang.
“Rumor has it, there might be some nude photos of her floating around online. She had to move to another city because of it,” I say, still not looking directly at Victoria.
When I finally glance at my little sister, her mouth is hanging open.
“You did that?”
I nod, something like pride swelling in my chest.
“Wait, you were at my first recital?”
“I wouldn’t have missed it for the world.”
Her bottom lip trembles. In the next second, she’s launching herself at me again, hugging me like I’m the only thing keeping her afloat. I’ve never been one for public displays of affection, but for Vi, I’d never turn her away.
Across the room, Roman and Niko exchange a look. No words needed. She’s the treasure of this family. For her, we’d all lay down our lives, paint the streets red if we had to. She’s the one pure thing in all this darkness.
Before we leave, Anuska, the woman who made the cookies, touches my arm gently.
“Can we talk in private for a minute?” There’s something in her eyes I recognize all too well: guilt.
I simply nod and gesture to a quiet corner. The others stay in the living room, probably grilling Julia for every scrap of information about me.
I study Anuska’s graying hair, her face pale from too much time indoors, her hands worn but gentle.
I never had a mother figure—Carmen was the only one who ever looked out for me—but if I had to imagine a mother’s hands, they’d look like hers.
Hands that knead dough for hours but would wipe away your tears without a second thought.
“I wanted to apologize for keeping silent, Maksim. You deserved to be known. I know Roman blames himself for not finding out sooner, but I was afraid of what he might discover if he went looking for you.”
I get it. I could’ve been dead. I could’ve turned out like Ivan-a monster. Or maybe just an ordinary man, untouched by violence. Finding me was a gamble, and she couldn’t risk putting her family in danger.
“There’s nothing to forgive, Anuska. I could’ve reached out to Roman a thousand times, but I chose not to. And I don’t regret it.”
She nods and, before heading to the kitchen, rises on tiptoe and kisses my cheek.
“You have a good heart, Max,” she whispers, and my chest tightens as I watch her go.
A good heart? That’s not something I’d ever call what beats in my chest. Broken, maybe.
Not enough. Weak. Guilty. If my heart were good, maybe I’d have been kept in this family.
If my heart were good, maybe I wouldn’t have caught the attention of a monster searching for a reflection of himself in his heir.
If my heart were good, maybe I would’ve seen the poison choking Zoya before it was too late.
No, my heart isn’t good. It’s worn out, gray, and the only reason blood still moves through my veins is her .
She’s laughing at one of Niko’s jokes, curls tumbling nearly to her elbows, that free, easy smile lighting up her face, too fucking beautiful for her own good.
Jealousy flickers in me as Niko studies her smile, but the moment her eyes meet mine, all my doubts vanish. There’s fire and light there, and I know no matter the life, no matter the world, I’d find her, and she’d be mine.
But the thought of Aleksandr still out there sends a prickle up my spine. He’s the last viper whose head I need to take. The last man who needs to pay for all the innocent blood he’s spilled.
Right now, it’s too quiet, far too quiet. I’m not naive enough to think he’ll stay hidden in whatever hole he’s crawled into. He’s plotting, I can feel it, and the storm on the horizon has me on edge.
All I can think about is keeping her safe.
Always her.
?