Chapter 7
Three nights later, we had a big show in a cool venue on East Colfax. There was a popular local band called Blame the Night who drew in a big crowd—and then there were not one or two but three supporting bands. And the backstage area was the nicest I’d ever seen.
But the best part? Since I was the only female in the bunch, I got my own dressing room.
I wasn’t completely sure, but I was under the impression that each member of Blame the Night had a personal dressing room, but supporting acts had to share with their own band members—so Cy, Zack, and Braden had their own spot.
I felt almost like a princess. Or I would have if not for the assholes in the other bands.
None of the guys from Blame the Night bothered me, but the two smaller bands were populated with neanderthals. Actually, that wasn’t true. Neanderthals would have been preferable.
It started when we first arrived. I was helping haul in the drums through the back and two guys were standing in the hallway talking. But as we got close to the area where we were told to leave our equipment, the first asshole said to Zack, “How’d you guys manage to score a roadie chick?”
Zack didn’t have a chance to respond. I said, “I’m not a roadie. I’m the drummer.”
At first, I’d just taken it for a simple mistake—but his next words confirmed that he was, indeed, a jackass. Looking at the other guy he’d been talking to, he said, “Isn’t that cute? She bangs on the drums.”
All I could muster was “Fuck you.”
Zack, however, stopped, setting down the bass drum to look the guy squarely in the eye—and the rest of us froze in place. “She’s damn good. I’d put her up against your shitty drummer any day of the week.”
“Our drummer’s not shitty.”
“I’ve watched you guys before. You’re delusional if you think you have a good drummer.”
I would have sworn the asshole’s cheeks turned pink. “We got a new drummer earlier this month.”
“And without even hearing your new guy, I’d still put Dani up against him any time.”
The guy just shook his head. It wasn’t until we were walking away that I heard him, voice lower, say to his friend, “Aw, she even has a cute little boy name.”
I was relieved that Zack didn’t hear it, ahead of us a few steps, because he probably would have escalated it further.
If that had been the only incident, I probably would have forgotten it, because that kind of bullshit happened all the time, even when I proved my worth.
But, when we were done getting our equipment in place, Cy and Braden stayed behind to tune their instruments while Zack and I headed back to our dressing rooms to find that the third band arrived backstage.
When they came over to introduce themselves, I thought that was pretty cool, because we were getting to know more bands the more we played—and more connections might always mean more chances to be heard and seen.
“Zack, right?”
“Yeah. Jon?”
“Yep.” The two frontmen shook hands. Jon said to his bandmates, “This is the dude I told you guys I was talking with online. We’re thinking we might collab in the future.
” His bandmates—a mixture of goth and punk types—seemed enthusiastic about the news, but then Jon had to go and say something obnoxious.
“You’re doing way better than I thought.
You already have a groupie hanging with you.
I’m jealous.” He chuckled, eyeing me up and down like a piece of meat.
I wasn’t wearing anything particularly provocative, because I was beginning to realize that it brought me the kind of attention I didn’t want.
Instead, I wore a pair of ripped jeans, red Converse sneakers, and a black t-shirt with a picture of Slash in his top hat, shredding his guitar.
I glared—but this time, Zack beat me to the punch.
“She’s not a groupie, man.”
“My bad,” he said to me before shifting his eyes back to Zack. “I’ve brought my woman with me on occasion.”
How I’d wished I was Zack’s woman…but he quashed that notion as well. “She’s our drummer.”
“No way!” said one of the other guys in the band.
“Yeah, and I kick ass.” I hoped they took my meaning in more ways than one. But that told me that, even though Jon had said he wanted to collaborate with our band, he clearly had never seen us play live and likely hadn’t watched any of the fan videos posted online.
At least he didn’t double down on his asshat-ery like the last guy had.
He said, “I’ve heard that—I just didn’t know you were a girl.
” If I hadn’t felt defensive, I would have asked if he was saying he’d heard our band was good or me specifically.
I was pretty sure he was talking about Once Upon a Riot.
But it was thanks to all the unwanted attention about the fact that I was female—and not about my skills as a drummer—that made me try even more. And I decided that I would play harder than ever before tonight to prove my worth.
Although this was the first time I’d been mistaken for a groupie or a roadie, it wasn’t the last, and it wasn’t the first time I’d been discounted—but the more I played, the more confidence I had in my abilities, and tonight was another chance to prove myself.
As the newest kids on the block, we went first. I was in complete awe—because even though we’d been playing bigger crowds, this one blew them all away.
Even the stage was a step above the places we’d been playing.
And the crowd gave me more energy that translated into a better performance.
I thought of flashy drummers, guys who were fun to watch, like Shannon Larkin, Fred Coury, and Keith Moon, and other guys who had showy set ups on some tours, like Tommy Lee and Joey Jordison, and wondered if I should start practicing to be more entertaining.
Or would it be better if I just quietly did my job like I always had?
By the end of the show, I was sweaty but excited, because I knew without a doubt that this was one of the best shows we’d ever performed in our short career. The guys knew it too.
After getting our equipment offstage, we took it out to the van and then, before the second band even began playing, we went to our respective dressing rooms. The four of us planned to meet up in fifteen minutes to head out to the auditorium—but I wanted to take a quick shower.
As I did, I smiled to myself that this was the first dressing room I’d been in where I felt like an actual star.
I could get used to this.
When I got dressed again, I tucked my panties in my backpack, not wanting to put the dirty things back on, and made a mental note.
From now on, I’d bring a change of clothes just in case I got the chance to shower at future venues.
In the hallway, I headed toward the guys’ dressing room since they weren’t in the hall as we’d planned.
I was not going to be happy if they’d gone out front without me.
As I approached their dressing room, though, I heard voices coming from an open door.
One voice I didn’t recognize at all. When I peeked my head inside the door, Zack waved me in—but the guy my bandmates were talking to had his back to me until that moment.
He gave me a nod and paused what he’d been saying to the guys.
“Hi. I was just telling your colleagues that you all came highly recommended by one of the other bands on our label.”
Braden, excitement dancing in his chocolate eyes, said to me, “Fully Automatic.”
As the man continued talking, I noticed that the guys were all holding in their hands what turned out to be the guy’s business cards.
“Anyway, I honestly don’t know if we’re looking for another heavy metal band—but when I talk to my higher ups, I can report that you’re all definitely talented.
You’ve got stage presence and confidence, and you get the audience involved.
I think you’d be a good addition to our lineup. ”
I couldn’t read Zack’s expression, but he didn’t seem too happy about it. Obviously, I’d missed something. “What do we need to do to get the ball rolling?”
“Barring any changes, nothing. I’ll talk to the powers that be and, if they’re interested, they’ll contact you.”
“I can give you my cell number,” Zack said.
Although the man put it in his phone, he seemed like he was in a hurry to leave—and, when he did, I asked, “Why didn’t they act like this is a good thing?”
Braden said, “I told you guys Fully Automatic wouldn’t let us down.”
“No, but their label is fucked.”
Even before I asked what he meant, I could see in Braden’s eyes that he agreed. Cy said, “He was just giving us lip service. If Fully Automatic ever asks the label, they can say they sent somebody.”
Zack said to me, “He told us it would be easier to sell us to the label if we were all male.”
“What? That’s bullshit.”
“Yeah. And I told him that. We come as a full package—and I hope you guys, Cy, Braden, agree with me. Dani’s part of our team and we either make or break it together.”
“Did you remind him that Pop Evil, Code Orange—”
“We didn’t even get there, Dani. You came in before we could grill him about his attitude.”
Cy said, “He pretty much clammed up when you showed up.”
“And that’s why he didn’t give you his card,” Zack said, dropping it so it fell to the floor. “I’m gonna shower.”
I glanced at the stiff paper he’d tossed on the ground. The man’s title was A&R Representative. I had no idea what that meant and decided I didn’t care. “But wait,” I said, pausing until Zack turned around, already opening the door to the tiny bathroom.
His response was a mere raised eyebrow.
“I…don’t want to hold you guys back. If you can make it without me—”