Chapter 28
Connor traced the week-old cut on Raven’s forehead as she slept. It was no longer bandaged and the doctor said it was healing well, but that did nothing to make him feel better. It should never have happened. Connor should have prevented it from happening.
The anger raged beneath his skin. Anger that he’d been feeling a lot of lately. Usually aimed at Xander or Nathaniel, but every so often it shifted toward himself. For leaving Raven unprotected. For letting Xander distract him with the truck and the body.
They’d traced Xander’s text message conversations, contacting the kid he’d used at the firehouse for another “job.” This one involving breaking into Connor’s house. But obviously, when they’d arrived, Xander had murdered him before he’d even had a chance to get out of the vehicle.
A soft sigh slipped from Raven’s lips, and when she turned her head, a lock of hair fell onto her cheek.
Gently, he smoothed it behind her ear. Her eyelids fluttered, then those beautiful ocean-blue eyes were open and looking right at him.
Her brows flickered. “Hey.”
“Good morning.”
“Have you been awake for long?”
He shook his head. A damn lie—he’d been awake for at least the last hour. He hadn’t wanted to move though.
She rolled to her side and seemed to take a moment to study him, something she’d been doing a lot. “You need to stop.”
“Stop what?”
“Blaming yourself. Nothing that happened that day was your fault.”
“You were attacked in my home, because I—”
“Left the house to investigate a threat. You did exactly what you were supposed to do. It was him who killed someone and broke in. And there was something good that came from that day. Xander’s gone and we’re safe.”
“You shouldn’t have been slammed into a mirror and almost drowned in a bathtub.”
She reached up and slid a finger down his cheek. “Do you love me?”
“You know I do.”
“Would you do anything for me?”
“Anything.”
“Forgive yourself.”
He should have seen that coming. “No promises…but I’ll try. How are you doing?”
“Excited to get back to work today without a shadow.”
“I’m still not—”
“It’s happening, Connor. Xander and Nathaniel aren’t a problem anymore. Deep River is safe. Plus, you need to get back to work or that anonymous benefactor will stop funding your lavish lifestyle.”
He laughed, but other than the lavish lifestyle part, it was true, he did need to get back to work. Ryan had training scheduled for them this morning that he knew was going to kill him. And shit, he loved those trainings. Plus, it would feel good to get back into a normal routine.
But how the hell was he supposed to leave Raven after last week? “You’re still hurt.”
“I’m not. I’m fine. Exactly why I’m going to visit Mom and Dad after work, then make my own way to Trap.”
“I’ll take you to visit your parents.”
She pushed him onto his back and leaned over him. “No.”
“Why not?”
“Because you’ll be going straight from work to the bar to have drinks with the guys.”
“Raven—”
“Why are you so argumentative?”
“Because you’ve suddenly become unbelievably stubborn.”
“I’ve always been unbelievably stubborn. I was just holding it in until you were locked into this relationship.”
His lips twitched. “Really?”
“Yep. Surprise and bad luck. Now, we’re going to shower. Then I’m going to drive myself to the community center while you drive yourself to the firehouse so that Ryan can slaughter you.”
“How do you know about that?”
“I heard Joel complaining yesterday. He said something about needing two breakfasts for that one.”
Connor laughed. “He eats two breakfasts every day. Says he’ll perish if he doesn’t.”
“Maybe he will.”
“And maybe pigs will fly.” His small smile faded. “You need me today, you call. Okay?”
“I need you, I call.”
He still wasn’t happy. But at some point, he needed to get okay with her being out of his sight.
He lifted his head and kissed her. He was just rolling her to her back and settling between her thighs, deepening the kiss, when she slid out from beneath him.
He growled. “Hey.”
“No time for that,” she called as she waltzed to the bathroom. “We have work.”
He caught her halfway and tossed her over his shoulder.
She cried out. “What are you doing?”
“If we shower together, we halve the time.”
“That is not what happens.” She laughed. “The opposite, actually.”
She was right. It took them twice as long as it should have to shower, maybe three times, because showering wasn’t the only thing they did in there.
When he finally got to work, the guys were already outside, warming up.
“You’re late,” Ryan called.
Jesus, someone was in a mood. But he’d been in a mood for weeks. Since that town meeting where Ferris had revealed a movie would be filmed in Deep River. Connor wasn’t even sure why. The cast for the movie had been released, and Emily Prior wasn’t in it.
Ryan shoved a weighted jacket into his chest. “Put this on. We’re starting with a run.”
And by run, Ryan never meant a leisurely jog.
Connor put on the jacket. But before starting, he moved over to Ethan and lowered his voice. “Hey. We have any idea where Xander was staying yet?”
Ethan shook his head. “Nope. It definitely wasn’t in any of the paid accommodations here in Deep River.”
Connor frowned. So where the fuck had he been?
“Sleeping in a stolen car?” Zac asked.
“No other cars have been reported stolen.” He’d checked with Ward.
“Let’s go,” Ryan shouted.
Connor started moving, but his mind was still on Xander. He needed this final piece of the puzzle before he could close this shit and stop thinking about it. But Xander was dead, so how exactly he was going to get it, he had no idea.
“You should have told us.”
Raven tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, her gaze going to the forest beyond the gate before returning to her father. “I know. I didn’t want to upset you.”
How many times had they had this conversation over the last week? A hundred? A hundred and one? And by the frustration on her father’s face, and the sadness on her mother’s, they’d probably have it a hundred more.
“If we’d known what he put you through…what he’d done…” Her mother covered her mouth like it was too much to process.
And it was. She wished she hadn’t had to tell them, but it was too much to hide. Plus, she needed them to know that he was gone and she was safe.
“We would have done so many things differently,” her mother said quietly. “We wouldn’t have taken his calls. We wouldn’t have passed on those things he sent to you.”
“I would have killed him,” her father grumbled.
Her mother dabbed her eyes.
“You shouldn’t have come back here,” her father added.
She swallowed. That was probably the hardest part for her parents—particularly her father—to accept. That she’d come back for them. To keep an eye on them and make sure Xander was keeping his word and leaving them alone.
She hadn’t told them that part, though they’d figured it out because they knew her too well.
She leaned forward, wind brushing her hair over her face. “It’s over now. Xander’s gone. He can’t hurt me or you or anyone.”
“Thank God,” her mother breathed.
“Now, can we please talk about something else?” She wasn’t above begging. “How’s bridge going?”
For a moment, she wasn’t sure her parents would let it go. They often didn’t.
Thankfully, her mother started talking about yesterday’s heated game and some cheating that had taken place. Her dad, of course, always the diplomat, added that her mother didn’t have evidence.
The first smile since arriving finally curved her lips. She loved it when they bickered. It was always accompanied by love. For a long time, she hadn’t been sure anyone would look at her the way her father looked at her mother…then she’d met Connor.
She nodded as her mother started ranting about how much the residents gossiped. Raven was tempted to tell her mother that what she was doing now sounded kind of like gossiping, but she kept her lips sealed. Their conversation had turned around, and Raven didn’t want to ruin that.
“They’re like teenage girls when any young man steps foot in this place.”
“You mean like Connor?”
“Yes. I think most of the women here, nurses included, almost hope Herbert wanders off some days.”
“Don’t forget about Briar’s man,” her father said, as he sipped his coffee. “They loved him.”
“I haven’t seen him for a while.”
“Briar has a man?” It shouldn’t surprise her. Briar was young and pretty.
“She tried to keep him a secret, but we’ve all seen them sneaking around the place.” Her mother leaned forward and lowered her voice. “He has nothing on Connor.”
She chuckled. “Connor will be happy to hear that.”
“What are you guys laughing about?”
They all looked up at Briar across the lawn. She stopped at the gate and used her key to check the lock.
“I was just telling Raven about Pattie cheating at bridge yesterday,” her mother huffed.
Briar’s smile widened as she headed over to them. “Now, Gene, Pattie vehemently denies that.”
“Pattie lies, my dear. You know she was an accountant before she lost her marbles. Never met an accountant I trusted.”
Briar gasped. “You do know I was an accountant in a past life?”
Raven’s brows lifted. “You were?”
“Yep. I’ve always been good with numbers but decided I was better with people.”
“I’d never have guessed that because I actually like you,” her mother mumbled, almost under her breath.
Raven chuckled again. Times like these, it was impossible to imagine her mother’s memory loss worsening. She was too full of life.
“Please tell me you’re here to get us for dinner.” Her father sighed. “Coffee and cookies just aren’t cutting it.”
Briar dipped her chin. “Dinner’s ready.”
“Want to join us?” her mother asked, looking at Raven.
She shook her head. “I’m meeting Connor at the bar. You go. I’ll clean up here.” They’d shared a plate of cookies, and her father had complained the entire time that they were too sweet. Lucky she loved her parents, because anyone else would say they complained too much.
After a quick hug, she watched her parents head inside with Briar.
She was about to stand with the empty plates and cups when Herbert stepped outside with two mugs.
Crap. “Herbert, I was just—”
“Have tea with me.” He sat before she could respond. “Please. I need to apologize.”
She frowned and lowered back into her seat, taking the tea from his outstretched hand. “Apologize?”
“I scared you the other day. Maybe both days. I’m sorry.”
The mug warmed Raven’s hands. “It’s okay.”
“It’s not. You asked me to leave and I didn’t. I also grabbed you.” He shook his head, genuine remorse on his face. “You don’t need to accept my apology, but it’s there.”
“There’s no apology needed.” She sipped the tea. Argh. She was not a tea person. Like, at all. And this just confirmed it. It tasted like she was drinking a sugary flower. “Chamomile?”
He nodded. “It was Lila’s favorite. I used to make it for her before bed. With a generous heaping of honey, of course.”
Oh, she absolutely tasted the honey. “What was she like?”
“Strong. Independent. She was a journalist, and she came down here to chase this big Lotus story.” He sighed. “Maybe that was her problem, she was too ambitious. I wish I’d helped her more.”
“Unfortunately, we can’t always help the people we love. They have to want to be helped.”
“While I agree, I also think when you love someone, you go to any lengths to save them.”
She sipped the tea again, nose wrinkling. There was something off about it. An almost bitter, chemical aftertaste.
“I shouldn’t have let her leave me to come here,” Herbert continued. “I should have kept her home where it was safe, shielded her from all the ugly in this world.”
Everything began to sway.
She glanced at the tea again before looking back at Herbert, a sick feeling starting to churn in her belly. “What did you do?”
This time when he looked at her, there was nothing confused or unsure in his gaze. There was just unwavering determination. “What had to be done to save you, Lila.”