Chapter 8 Circe
Circe
“You should kill her and be done with it.”
I turn away from Hecate and face Antigone. She’s been at my side for a very long time, and that familiarity means I allow her to speak her mind freely. A leader without dissenting opinions in the room is no leader at all but a tyrant. Even so, some things I won’t allow.
I meet her gaze squarely, letting her see how serious I am. “Let’s make one thing clear. If any harm comes to Hecate, I’ll visit it upon you tenfold. She’s not to be touched. Even by you.”
Antigone flushes, but she doesn’t look away. “She’s a dagger poised right at your heart. You hold back with her in a way you don’t with anyone else. The rest of the Thirteen are complacent and prime for the taking, but even we have had a hard time keeping track of Hermes.”
“Hecate.”
Her lips thin with displeasure. “She may have been Hecate to you, but she’s Hermes right now. By her choice. By her actions.”
The truth of her comment stings, but I brush it away.
It doesn’t matter what Hecate has done since believing me dead.
I’m not dead and neither is she. As long as that remains true, there’s hope for us.
I haven’t experienced hope in a very, very long time.
It’s a tiny breath of lightness in the back of my mind, something fragile and easily crushable.
I have no doubt Hecate will hate me for a time after I see this through, but the connection between us never faded.
It never will. That’s something to fight for, no matter what else is true.
I’ve never considered myself a romantic, but she brings it out in me; she always has.
Instead of continuing to argue with Antigone, I change the subject. “The bodies?”
She pauses but finally releases a long sigh. “Aphrodite has been dealt with according to your orders. Demeter and Psyche claimed Eros’s body. Psyche won’t leave its side. It’s pathetic.”
“She loves him.” I shrug with a nonchalance I don’t feel.
Eros was a miscalculation, but I don’t see how the situation could have played out differently.
Maybe if I’d had him and Psyche sequestered…
They still would have discovered Peitho’s death at the same time as the rest of the city, but at least that would have given me the opportunity for damage control.
Perhaps I could have found a way to avoid killing him.
I can’t say that to Antigone, though. The only reason I occupy this position of leadership is because I don’t showcase doubt.
I’m not about to start now when we’re so close to the end.
“If Psyche is focused on her grief, she won’t be causing problems for us, and Demeter will be focused on her.
Leave her to it, but have someone keep an eye on both of them.
” I know better than anyone not to underestimate the lengths grief will drive a person to.
By the time Psyche pulls herself out of hers enough to act, this should be finished, but there’s no reason to get complacent.
“Will do.”
“Give me the status on the rest of the Thirteen and the legacy families.”
“We should have dealt with them earlier. A good portion have taken refuge behind the barrier in the lower city.” She shifts from foot to foot.
Antigone has never been able to stand still when she’s agitated.
“Artemis, Hephaestus, and Apollo are still on this side of the river the last report I saw. Maybe Dionysus, too, but none of our people can confirm one way or another. Artemis stayed because she’s too stubborn and proud.
The others are trying to ensure we won’t gain access to their information and networks. ”
I laugh. “It’s a little too late for that on most counts, but let them scramble.
” I glance at Hecate again, measuring the steady rise and fall of her chest. It’s frustrating that the main three responsible for my harm are currently unreachable, but they won’t stay that way for long.
All we have to do is find the location of the machinery responsible for keeping the lower city barrier up, and it will come down just like the one around the perimeter of the city did.
Of course, I’m not the one who brought down the barrier around Olympus.
Hecate is. By my estimates, my team was a bare hour behind her, arriving just in time to see the building explode.
She ensured Olympus will have no path back to its former isolation, that nothing will ever be the same again.
And still she insists our interests aren’t aligned.
“Keep me updated on the progress of our team in the lower city. Stealth is the top priority, even if they see one of our targets. We need that barrier down.” I take a breath and roll my shoulders.
“In the meantime, gather up the members of the Thirteen left in the upper city. The legacy families, too. Every one you can get your hands on.”
Antigone doesn’t immediately move. “While we do that, you’ll finally rest.”
I don’t tell her for the thousandth time that I don’t need as much sleep as a normal person. My insomnia has been well documented by my people through the years. I’ve been up for well over twenty-four hours at this point. I need to sleep, even if it’s only for a few hours.
There’s one last task to handle first, though.
“I need to speak with Demeter before I do.” Eros’s death will have rattled her, and if she’s going to break, I need to know sooner rather than later.
She’s a formidable woman, and having her as an ally weighed public opinion in my favor.
If she’s going to become an enemy, there are several steps I need to take before I can remove her as a threat. Permanently.
“We’ll set her up in one of the classrooms. Nerissa will come get you when she’s ready.”
“Thank you.” I can feel her gaze on me, but I don’t look at Antigone.
Not this time. There was a point in our relationship where we might have been friends, might have even been more, but the events leading to my exile from Olympus left me too hollow.
I’m not monster enough to string along one of the few people in this world firmly in my corner for the sake of caring for me, not because of what I might give them.
Antigone deserves a partner who can love her sharp edges and the softness hidden beneath.
It was never going to be me. Up until setting eyes on Hecate, I wasn’t sure I was capable of loving anyone anymore.
After a prolonged pause, Antigone turns and walks out of the room.
I exhale slowly. I should have said something, found different words.
Directing the conversation to the plan instead of my personal conflict regarding Hecate was cowardly, but it was the only way.
I don’t have a good argument to keep her.
Antigone’s logic is sound, and if I were in her position, I would advocate for the same thing; remove the threat and simplify everyone’s life.
But this is Hecate. I won’t let anyone kill her. Even me.
I sink onto the couch next to her. She looks so peaceful while she’s sleeping, even if it’s a forced sleep courtesy of the drugs I injected her with.
The only side effect she’ll suffer is a headache and some lingering lethargy when she wakes up, but I can’t keep drugging her without long-term effects.
A few more times, yes, but after that, it will harm her.
No matter what else is true, I don’t want that.
“You little fool.” I can’t stop myself from brushing my fingertips over her forehead. “If you’d stop being so stubborn, we’d be unstoppable.”
The door opens, Nerissa poking her head in. “Demeter is ready for you.”
“Thank you.” I rise and look around the room.
The vents are too small for a human to fit into.
There are no windows to escape from. A single door is the only exit.
Even if she were to wake up before I estimate the drugs wearing off, she won’t have the strength or time to try to bash through one of the walls.
Someone would hear and come to investigate.
It will have to be enough. “Station someone at the door. No one comes in except me.”
Nerissa frowns but nods. “I’ll see to it personally.”
“You have other more important things to do.” I smile as I say it. “But I appreciate the offer. Station someone else, Nerissa.”
She waits for me to close the door behind me to speak. “She is important to you. Antigone might be looking at this with a protective lens, and I can’t blame her for that, but it’s clear your feelings for that woman haven’t gone away.”
I raise my brows. “Do you have a problem with that?” I can recognize Hecate is undermining my authority within my people, but the only logical solution to negate that is to kill her, and that’s the one thing I refuse to do.
The alternative is to make an example of one of my people once they cross the line questioning me, which brings me no joy to contemplate.
So many choices of leadership come down to bad ones.
“It doesn’t really matter if I do or not, does it?” With anyone else, the statement would be barbed. With Nerissa, it’s simply fact. “My job is to protect you while you bring justice to Olympus. That woman didn’t hurt you.”
False. Hecate tore my heart out of my chest when she took the Hermes title. But that betrayal is between the two of us. It’s personal, and we’ll navigate it one way or another. Together. “That doesn’t change the fact that you have plenty to do that doesn’t involve babysitting our captive.”
“Circe.” She sighs. “Every single one of us would die for you. You know we’d kill for you. Most of us have already.”
I know this. “And?”
“And all it would take is one of our people deciding to save you by eliminating what is the biggest perceived threat. Her.” She squares her shoulders. “I’m staying on the door.”