Chapter 2
ROSALIE
Idrew in a deep, calming breath and closed my eyes, Anson’s words on repeat in my head as I clutched the pink, bejeweled microphone he and Evan had custom-made for me.
You’ve done it a thousand times, LeeLee. What’s a thousand and one?
I blew out the breath that was burning my lungs as the thundering of the crowd sounded out around me.
I’d wanted this. I’d dreamed of these moments. But as I stood beneath the stage waiting to be raised in front of the crowd in my tight black dress, all I wanted to do was cry.
I caught sight of Ryder, who frowned and took a step toward me.
“Are you OK?” he mouthed, concern on his face.
I swallowed and shook my head. I felt like I was going to have a panic attack.
Ryder made to move toward me, but it was too late.
Before a tear could fall, the signal came, and I was raised to the center stage. I forced the sadness away and fixed the fake smile I’d perfected over the years onto my face in the darkness as the crowd roared around me, screaming my name.
Bishop! Bishop! Bishop!
Victor’s heavy drums pounded my intro. Lights flashed. I had to. I couldn’t let my sadness get to me.
I opened my mouth and let out the first line of my newest hit fall from my lips.
We built a world almost a thousand miles from home.
Fans rushed the stage. Security formed the line I’d seen thousands of times. I sang, taking in every face I could. Some fans stood staring at me in awe as others jostled and screamed around them, tears streaking down their cheeks. Others jumped up and down, holding signs.
Every time I try to hold you, the universe says no…
The song poured out of me as I moved on stage, dancing the routine I’d gone over a million times. Move against Hex. Cradle Cas’s face. Lean into Bane. Prance around the drum rise.
We dance between the moments, like lightning in the rain…
The song ended to thundering applause as I stood staring out at what I’d always wanted. However, something was missing, and it had been for the last almost five years.
Years had flown by. We walked out of each other’s lives, and it was like they’d never existed to begin with.
Like I’d never existed.
And this was me now—a girl with a microphone and a broken heart with thousands of people screaming my name.
Beneath the sadness I masked, I did have love and joy, so I couldn’t complain, but I also still harbored anger and confusion about how it all went wrong when I thought everything was so right.
The things the horsemen did—cheat, marry, impregnate another woman—all when everything was falling apart. The betrayal cut me so deep that it became the subject of many of my songs.
But still… I couldn’t help but wonder what might have been.
The drums hammered out again, and Cas nudged me, his lips to my ear.
“Head in the game, Cherry,” he said, his deep voice rumbling. Cas was one of my guitarists, and he could read me like a book when he wasn’t destroying a hotel room or trying to set things on fire.
I closed my eyes and breathed out before forcing a smile onto my face. I let my eyes open as I stared out at the thousands of fans in the sold-out stadium.
“Hello, New York! How the hell are you tonight?”
The crowd roared back just like they always did.
And me?
I sang for them just like I always did.
This was my life now.
“We have the Grammys coming up. An interview with Risqué magazine, two interviews, one of those being for a big YouTube channel. We have to shoot the new photos for the promotion Trackmaster wants done, and you have Ellie’s ballet recital coming up,” Anson said as we settled into the back of the limo after the show.
We were nearing the last handful of shows before the tour ended. A little downtime for me, finally.
I felt like I hadn’t breathed in the last four years, not since my first album release went double platinum. I’d gone from a nobody to a someone overnight, it seemed. And it hadn’t stopped. I never seemed to have any peace.
I groaned and rested my head against the seat.
Anson chuckled. “I scheduled us time away, too, LeeLee. I thought we could go somewhere quiet so you can rest and spend time with family.”
I cracked my eyelids open and gave the handsome man who had become one of the most important people in my life a smile. “I knew I kept you around for a reason.”
He grinned at me, his blue eyes glittering. “I thought you kept me around because I can cook.”
“That too,” I said, my eyes locked on his as I moved closer. He glanced around before reaching out and pulling me onto his lap.
His soft lips met mine in a possessive kiss, his hands tight on my waist. The limo had blacked-out windows, and the partition was up. I kept my relationship status a secret. In fact, my entire family life was a secret. Anson did an amazing job ensuring it stayed that way.
Typically, behavior like this was off-limits when we were outside our home, but I needed him.
“Fuck,” his voice rumbled against my lips. “I’ve wanted to kiss you for hours now.”
“Mm, well, here I am,” I replied before deepening the kiss.
He pushed the straps of my dress down before he massaged my breasts. I broke away from him, breathless, and his lips descended on a nipple, sucking it into his mouth amid my whimper.
“Shh, LeeLee,” he murmured, kissing along the soft mound. “I don’t want anyone to hear me fucking you, baby.”
He had such a dirty mouth.
I loved it.
“Are you going to fuck me?”
“Yes.”
“What about your rules?”
“Fuck the rules. I want you.” He shoved my panties aside and ran his finger along my slit, his lips back on mine.
He pushed his finger forward, making me moan softly against his lips again. He was quick to swallow it down before pulling the digit out and breaking off the kiss.
I watched with parted lips as he sucked his finger into his mouth.
“I’d eat your pussy if we had more time,” he said before undoing his pants and pulling his long, thick, pierced cock out.
I was quick to shift and slide down on it, a low, strained groan falling from his lips as he bottomed out inside me.
“Mm, baby,” he said breathlessly. “I love you.”
“I love you.” I rode him, his hands on my hips guiding me.
His lips pressed to mine, his kiss deep and possessive. That was the thing about Anson. He did everything with his entire heart, including loving me.
The last almost five years had been the best of my life, despite all the heartache I lived with.
I twisted my fingers in his black hair, earning another growl from him as he shifted upward and hit a spot within me that made me whimper out his name.
“Oh god,” I rasped.
“Yeah, baby? You like that?” Anson asked against my lips.
“Yes. Yes,” I moaned.
“Shh.” He kissed me again. “Shh, songbird. You know the rules. You have to be quiet when my cock is buried inside you when we are in public.”
I whimpered, my release teasing me.
Anson knew every tell I had and railed into me hard, sending me spiraling over the edge. It took everything I had not to shriek his name.
He followed a moment later, his dick pulsing inside of me.
Breathless, I pressed my forehead against his.
“You’re my whole world, LeeLee,” he murmured, cradling my face.
I kissed him gently. “I love you, Ani.”
He smiled at that, so much adoration on his face.
“Fuck, I will never get used to this,” he continued softly.
“Mm.” I kissed him again. “Me either.”
He chuckled and squeezed my hips. “Based on the number of stops we’ve made, I’d say we have enough time for one more go.”
I smiled at him before slowly moving again. He let out a soft groan, his hands guiding me as he liked.
“LeeLee, baby.” He jutted up into me. “Faster. Make me come for you.”
I loved it when he went weak for me like that. I moved faster. He captured my lips with his to silence my moans.
I came a moment later, my body trembling.
He followed, shaking beneath me, his cock pulsing deep inside me a final time.
We both came down breathlessly, our foreheads against one another, while I stayed on his lap, his dick still buried inside me.
“I can’t wait until we’re making our baby,” he whispered. “I keep dreaming of him.”
I raked my fingers gently through his hair.
We had been discussing having another baby lately.
We had Ellie, but had been talking about having another one.
We were just going to do it, and whoever got me pregnant would be fine, but I knew both Evan and Ani were hellbent on competing with one another over it. “Soon, Ani. A few more shows.”
“I’m counting it down.” He kissed me again.
I smiled against his lips.
“We will be at the hotel any minute.”
I groaned, not wanting to move off him. He chuckled and pecked my lips before helping me shift off his softening dick. We both quickly righted ourselves, me wincing because of how much of a mess he made inside me.
“Is it weird that I like knowing my come is dripping out of your pussy?” he asked, his blue eyes on me.
My cheeks flushed at his words. “Is it weird that I like it too?”
He gave me the sweetest smile. “Then we’re both weird, baby.”
I chuckled softly as the limo came to a stop. He reached out and fluffed my hair and fixed my dress.
“Perfect,” he murmured.
The door opened, and we were met with the shouts of fans and papparazzi who learned which hotel I’d be in. My band rode separately, but I knew they’d be going out because I’d heard them discussing it before the show started.
Anson helped me out, and I plastered my smile onto my face as I signed autographs for fans.
“Easy,” Ryder’s deep voice boomed out as several fans tried shoving the barrier.
He and two other members of my security team moved forward to surround me. Anson’s warm hand never left my back, though, as he helped guide me through the mess.
Ryder and my security always rode in a separate car. Sometimes Ryder rode with us, but tonight wasn’t one of those nights. I think he knew I needed some alone time with Anson because he’d winked at me before climbing into the second SUV.
“Bishop! Hey, bitch!”
I looked up just as someone in a mask threw something red all over me. It was warm and sticky. The smell of it made me gag.
Acrid. Rotten. Like copper that was shoved right through my senses, the taste invading my mouth.
Immediately, I reached for my face, my entire body trembling as the sour, metallic mess trickled down my cheeks and across my lips. It was everywhere. My face. My hair. My chest. Everything was covered in… red.
People screamed. My security jumped the barriers to catch the guy who’d thrown it. Fans shoved one another as my security struggled to get through them. Cameras flashed. More shouting.
It was complete hysterics as I tried to blink away the fluid, my stomach roiling.
“LeeLee?” Anson’s frantic voice cut through the haze. “Hey. Hey!”
He gripped my face, his blue eyes raking over me before his arm was around my waist and he lifted me into his arms. He rushed through the front doors of the hotel as I clung to him.
I didn’t even realize I was sobbing until he had me in the elevator. The moment the doors dinged closed, his hands were back on my face as he placed me on my feet.
“Look at me,” he commanded. “Are you OK? Does it hurt?”
I shook my head, my tears streaming down my cheeks. “I-I think it’s blood.” My voice was a soft rasp. “A-Ani. I-It’s blood. It’s blood!”
A muscle ticked along his jaw. The moment the elevator dinged at our penthouse, he had me in his arms. He walked me straight into the shower and began peeling my soaked clothes off me. He turned to start the water, cursing softly under his breath.
I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror to see that I looked like I’d just survived a horror movie. Blood was caked in my hair. Down my face, arms, abdomen, and legs. My body trembled, and I nearly collapsed, feeling really light and strange.
Anson turned just as I started to go down.
He caught me in his arms and went to the floor with me, stopping my fall.
“Hey. Hey, LeeLee,” he said, giving me a shake. “Fuck. Baby. Hey. Come on. Open your eyes. Look at me.”
I fluttered my lashes, feeling weak.
“I know you’re scared,” he murmured. “Talk to me. What’s wrong?”
“I-I need to be cleaned,” I whispered. “Please. Get it off me.”
He didn’t say another word. I was placed in the shower, with him following me in, fully clothed in one of the dark suits he often wore.
“Your clothes,” I mumbled.
“Shh.” He began washing and scrubbing me after he sat me on the seat against the tiles, his face a stone mask of pure fury.
His phone buzzed in his pocket, but he ignored it.
“Ani—”
“It’s fine,” he said tightly. “You’re more important.”
He removed the showerhead and set to work scrubbing my hair. I cried, my body shaking the entire time as I watched the red water fall around me.
“Close your eyes, baby,” he said gently. “OK? Close them. Let me handle this.”
I did as he said.
“Now, deep breaths. In. Out. Breathe with me, my love.”
I tried, but I was too worked up. I’d had fans do a lot of odd things over the years, but no one had ever done anything even close to that. All I could think about was what if it had been a knife or a gun? Then what? Ellis would be without me. My family would be without me.
Anson’s soft, shaky singing sounded out.
I squeezed my eyelids tighter, listening to the way he sounded. He’d have been a big deal had he followed his dreams. Instead, he’d pushed me to have mine.
He continued cleaning me until he finally turned off the water. The door opened, and then a warm towel was wrapped around me.
“Good as new,” he said softly as he dried me off.
I stared up at him, taking in the sadness and anger on his face.
“I’m going to order you something to eat,” he said, his voice thick.
“You’re going to eat it. I-I need to get you to the hospital.
What if…” His voice trailed off, his throat bobbing before he shook his head quickly.
“Then, you’re going to sleep. I’m going to handle this.
Call Evan like always, OK? Can you do that? ”
I swallowed and nodded. “Y-Yeah. I-I can do that.”
“Good girl,” he murmured, dragging a soft white robe onto my body.
I didn’t even get to walk. He lifted me easily into his arms and brought me straight to our king-size bed and placed me in it, tucking me in tightly before pressing a fierce kiss to my forehead. He turned on the TV, and a romantic comedy came on.
“I’ll be right back,” he said.
“OK,” I whispered, curling into a tight ball.
He stepped away and grabbed new clothes, letting me know he likely wasn’t going to be sleeping tonight since they weren’t his pajamas.
He left the bedroom, and I could hear him on the phone in the living room area moments later, his voice rough.
I turned up the TV so I wouldn’t have to hear whatever was happening.
I just wanted to forget the entire ordeal because I wasn’t afraid to admit that I was terrified.
I knew in my heart it was blood. Anson knew it.
But god, why?
And I think that was one of the most terrifying questions of all.